reliability is a liability...

where was i to go once life misdirected its path?
under the assumption that i found the retreatin past.
standin still. which way was to lead to a home movin away?
wrap ur mind around the loss that flew without a cape.
it wasnt i that leaped into the skies lies seen through overflowin wells.
superman was as human as those emotion in which u dwell.
strong enough to withstand any blow that blew in the wind.
as still as the earths plantation to be witnessed as a friend.
where was i suppose to tuck the unused luv?
growin uncontrollably ready to burst with a single touch.
hidden from interest taken in my own character.
who is it u thought i was as if it even mattered?
by thy side of the one that pulled me under.
am i a thought of twisted pleasure emptied by the hunger?
unwillin to give to a new face what was promised to an other.
whats the angle expected to get the toes tappin.
after all, i became the design of pure emotion that happened.
open n infected by self righteous worth lingerin on.
til the pop poofed the smoke n i walked from the cloud still goin.
underestimated n unseen in a dyin devotion u failed.
u were witness to the honesty u couldnt accept as u derailed.
dismounted as legs spun unknowin intention told comin forth was a state of mind.
where was i to go stranded in a world all alone, doin nothin with time?
speak those unspoken words of truths as u run to me with the every now n again.
hidin behind the scenes unnoticed by others as a secret thing.
my luv does not fade in moments to harsh that happiness cannot thrive,
in the middle of the madness ilu ripped from my lips unwillin to die.
so tell me where was i to wind up to ur approval passin judgement.
as if u earned ur place to verbally connect with what u threw into a dungeon.
all ive eva wanted was to see that smile awaken with joy.
yet, what came of my attempt stalled n swiveled within the void.
clingin to the walls of the hole u dug deep enough to bury me.
thing is, i allowed u to dig what i pushed u into as ur own pet cemetery.
reincarnated as a more demented tongue comin back from the dead.
n i listen with ears that could hear the beatin of ur own heart that fled.
where was i but lost tryin to redirect what ur thoughts have become of relations?
i was only a man standin in the way of wantin to be seen tryin to correct ur imitations.
so i wound up where but in the movement of gettin the head leveled out.
slippin across lips not of urs i stepped into the good ol ways without a drought.
as ur disapproval riddles diddles written in a true form of us.
what was it u expected id do after expressin what was neva on hush?
i am more than youve eva ask for that came from a childhood dream.
n u took me n placed me at ur 4eva ungrateful needs down upon my knees.
as the tappin of letters through the alphabet searches for the answers unheard.
the sound of ur voice alone toys with what u claim as me holdin off the birds.
refusin to be mad over the events that led to the now of playin peekaboo.
let it ride or live the life u choose the most as do or die could neva lose.
ya neva cried with me in those moments stealin worth from the feel.
whats real in the depths or ur eyes from a distance watchin the unfoldin of the deal?
but me driftin with the ripples that float away from the presence of us.
n this is what u consider to want me to believe is luv?
ur always right on cue that affects the effect of gettin the regulated rules of this imprisonment adjusted.
locked in to the ball n chain that attaches the vibe to the fingers thrill rung by the material corrupted.
devided by the concur, its not my hands that gently soothes ur skins comfort.
where was i when u doozed of but in the mix of holdin u up? but we aint countin numbers.
this is the me in the flesh that presents the under linings able to surface as what left.
feelin my way through the cracks that have exposed the undeniable proof at its best.
Its the hauntin of tge memory u tease with ur coming of the goin.
Tucked in tight as the night consumed that unconditional mourn.
i wore that full mental jacket u locked Me in.
n the Houdini in me left it on long enough to grin.
what did ya think would become of the papers that bound to burn?
fire to ice, I felt the confusion eradicate an alliance hurt.
Over the hump n down the hill on a sled the wee came back into its own.
Standin erect in the middle of my lifes domain finally grown...

written while listening to rhcp...