can u feel them walk in n straight thru u?
everytime the breeze blows it's chill loose.
r they felt once a hole had taken then away?
as if they once filtered what was meant to stay.
it's funny how u can feel em walk straight thru u. As if the breeze blew n u felt em come n go as reason had no use. Jus comin to chill n leave as if the window fell outta the pane. Jus stepped into n right back out like the wind chasin the rain. It's a feelin that fills n empties luv that changes with the seasons. As the emotions collect the scars lesions. They act as a filter cleansin the mind of false hopes. Cuz once they enter they take the purity that can't cope. As what's left is the reality where maturity kicks in. So u should thank em for stealin ur grin. To lose the weight that plagues the heart is such the relief. For the mind becomes more crisp n understand up of the knees.
Tuesday, December 23, 2014
Monday, December 22, 2014
the only
under the impression of one luv.
circles the unmanageable mind.
true luv is more to luv only one.
depths r dug once, crossin the line.
jus one is all there is to luv.
luv that one cuz there isn't another.
they're all that exist that far down.
the only luv one can call forever.
circles the unmanageable mind.
true luv is more to luv only one.
depths r dug once, crossin the line.
jus one is all there is to luv.
luv that one cuz there isn't another.
they're all that exist that far down.
the only luv one can call forever.
u gotta show me
it's so easy fallin in luv with u.
if u lemme, if u want me to.
sounds strange like how do u control it.
allow me to demonstrate thru the b.s.
cuz u gotta show me who u truly r.
if there's any chance of us neva to part.
decipher with me the mystery of us.
opened n barred, mentally touched.
this is me as if opened for u to witness.
with reality as my only emotional twist.
I have learned of hands that smear.
n endured the feelin of disappointin fear.
lost once luv'd, I am pure n waitin on u.
with ur past jus make a truce.
emptyin some space so life can appreciate ur heart.
endless luv would luv to know who u r.
to level with u as you'd neva be alone again.
this one, this chance, this is a real man.
wantin ur hands in my plans.
lemme collapse into ur truths.
gently intrude so u know for u there's use.
one day at a time, slowly intertwined.
share with me time.
the ability to get the fuck down.
here in the now...
it's up to u
I trust no one!
do u really need to know y?
u may not like.
cuz the one I luv left n I don't wanna try.
details?
well, if u must know the truth.
I'm broken!
n no, it's not that I don't luv u.
my heart is simply fightin death.
i don't believe in lies.
so understandin them, I will never give the time.
lets stop fillin the mind.
I'm me n u r u, now sigh.
u wont luv me forever.
lets jus enjoy what we have.
Then forget we were even together.
who cares if it sounds that bad?
reality doesn't care cuz it is real!
it's somethin to accept n expect.
in that way I could never feel.
I've been there n it will end.
this is it, n its up to u.
don't change my past.
jus be u n live til its through.
if u wanna go.
that's the point I was tryin to make.
feel free to do u.
whether ur here or losin interest as a mate.
it's life as it's best.
givin another experience a moment.
this is how it works.
so while it's before u, hold it!
do u really need to know y?
u may not like.
cuz the one I luv left n I don't wanna try.
details?
well, if u must know the truth.
I'm broken!
n no, it's not that I don't luv u.
my heart is simply fightin death.
i don't believe in lies.
so understandin them, I will never give the time.
lets stop fillin the mind.
I'm me n u r u, now sigh.
u wont luv me forever.
lets jus enjoy what we have.
Then forget we were even together.
who cares if it sounds that bad?
reality doesn't care cuz it is real!
it's somethin to accept n expect.
in that way I could never feel.
I've been there n it will end.
this is it, n its up to u.
don't change my past.
jus be u n live til its through.
if u wanna go.
that's the point I was tryin to make.
feel free to do u.
whether ur here or losin interest as a mate.
it's life as it's best.
givin another experience a moment.
this is how it works.
so while it's before u, hold it!
y is it?
y is it I can't feel the luv until u reach for me?
like empty cargo shipped off over seas.
sent for the fill so the vacant space didn't end up sittin still.
nothin hits the sweet spot like u had when u owned my emotional capsule.
y is it I'm anchored to the one thing that'll never be?
bobbin at the surface for everyone to see.
I'd drown if I didn't have ur memory unwillin to leave.
n at times it doesn't feel as if the air I can breathe.
cuz I'd luv for it to smell like u jus walked by.
as I stop u n hold u in my arms smilin in time.
y is it I can't shut this thing down that u touched?
with the distance that plays n only seems to strengthen the luv.
life without u jus isn't the same n is so fuckin weird.
even though I know u r slowly fadin into my yesteryears.
back when I said yes to the devotion u turned on.
I fear the day I stand face to face unable to hide my thorns.
the rose may have died but its frozen to remain in my chiseled chest.
I can't thaw unless it's to ur warmths feel with interest.
y is it the truth only spreads itself hidden in these lines no one can read?
tellin what's in the creases tucked to comfort the need.
cuz its u that I will forever want as kryptonite.
madly in luv yet I'll never be able to stand near the lies.
as the ache curves realities change that you'd r.i.p. Me apart.
it's harsh tryin to accept the facts that stand guard.
I lost the piece of me that stood against anyone that ever came along.
n to think of it, for u, I was wronged.
to luv u is to shred what I am n weave it into a rug at ur feet.
yeah I understand that it truly got that deep.
yet I want u in ways no other will ever do.
so y is it I'm the only one ur not afraid to lose?
is it u know I'll always stand by ur side no matter what?
cuz it hurts to be (THE ONE) u claim is ur true luv.
n I hear u came lookin for ur way back through me.
to me, I was told it seems u jus might not be done.
question is, how can I trust roulette is fun?
like empty cargo shipped off over seas.
sent for the fill so the vacant space didn't end up sittin still.
nothin hits the sweet spot like u had when u owned my emotional capsule.
y is it I'm anchored to the one thing that'll never be?
bobbin at the surface for everyone to see.
I'd drown if I didn't have ur memory unwillin to leave.
n at times it doesn't feel as if the air I can breathe.
cuz I'd luv for it to smell like u jus walked by.
as I stop u n hold u in my arms smilin in time.
y is it I can't shut this thing down that u touched?
with the distance that plays n only seems to strengthen the luv.
life without u jus isn't the same n is so fuckin weird.
even though I know u r slowly fadin into my yesteryears.
back when I said yes to the devotion u turned on.
I fear the day I stand face to face unable to hide my thorns.
the rose may have died but its frozen to remain in my chiseled chest.
I can't thaw unless it's to ur warmths feel with interest.
y is it the truth only spreads itself hidden in these lines no one can read?
tellin what's in the creases tucked to comfort the need.
cuz its u that I will forever want as kryptonite.
madly in luv yet I'll never be able to stand near the lies.
as the ache curves realities change that you'd r.i.p. Me apart.
it's harsh tryin to accept the facts that stand guard.
I lost the piece of me that stood against anyone that ever came along.
n to think of it, for u, I was wronged.
to luv u is to shred what I am n weave it into a rug at ur feet.
yeah I understand that it truly got that deep.
yet I want u in ways no other will ever do.
so y is it I'm the only one ur not afraid to lose?
is it u know I'll always stand by ur side no matter what?
cuz it hurts to be (THE ONE) u claim is ur true luv.
n I hear u came lookin for ur way back through me.
to me, I was told it seems u jus might not be done.
question is, how can I trust roulette is fun?
Saturday, December 20, 2014
sands of time
the promise jus turned into the sands of time.
I couldn't hold on to every single grain defined.
fallin on their own, in their own direction.
like a waterfall in the hands pourin emotions.
it jus shattered n cut the palms that gave way.
I'm sorry but i had to let u go to heal the wounds.
it was never my intensions to break our luv in two.
in to pieces fragmented without repair.
but walkin away i gotta say i no longer felt impaired .
I couldn't hold on to every single grain defined.
fallin on their own, in their own direction.
like a waterfall in the hands pourin emotions.
it jus shattered n cut the palms that gave way.
I'm sorry but i had to let u go to heal the wounds.
it was never my intensions to break our luv in two.
in to pieces fragmented without repair.
but walkin away i gotta say i no longer felt impaired .
Friday, December 19, 2014
starrin back like a coward
on the other side of the mirror lookin at me with a expression of disappointment peekin back at me as if the end.
Back behind the reality lookin in from the dark side of the light, I see what can't be seen standin within my only friend.
fair is fair when one cares, darin to come from the third party standin in the shadow in another dimension hidden.
Shakin the head as if a shrink amazed at what we've become in a battle of luv as self's been bitten.
it appears to me there's no guts left in the eyes that's changed abruptly cuz I wasn't true to self.
N I'm lookin thru the image starrin back like a coward as if I know I'm isolated beyond the glass n trapped with no help.
I can't reach myself without breakin me into millions of pieces that'll shatter the separation so I can become whole again.
yet none of the trio trust like we did back when nothin got in under the pleasure as we stood as an independent man.
one two three n the third can't be seen without a light on the other side of the two way mirror, provin we're connected.
in a lineup in perfect alignment that needs broken so the edges can relate in a conversation that we're not crazy, yet infected.
afraid of the pride that's gotten in the way becomin thinner than that of time unseen lost without a cause.
I'm a prisoner of my own mind that cracked goin kookoo like a hairline fracture inside an invisible force field flawed in a pause.
from behind the mirror we all turn the head the same way as not a one of us is watchin our back.
Yet only the two on the twins side is seen cuz they can't see self outside of self livin with the facts.
Back behind the reality lookin in from the dark side of the light, I see what can't be seen standin within my only friend.
fair is fair when one cares, darin to come from the third party standin in the shadow in another dimension hidden.
Shakin the head as if a shrink amazed at what we've become in a battle of luv as self's been bitten.
it appears to me there's no guts left in the eyes that's changed abruptly cuz I wasn't true to self.
N I'm lookin thru the image starrin back like a coward as if I know I'm isolated beyond the glass n trapped with no help.
I can't reach myself without breakin me into millions of pieces that'll shatter the separation so I can become whole again.
yet none of the trio trust like we did back when nothin got in under the pleasure as we stood as an independent man.
one two three n the third can't be seen without a light on the other side of the two way mirror, provin we're connected.
in a lineup in perfect alignment that needs broken so the edges can relate in a conversation that we're not crazy, yet infected.
afraid of the pride that's gotten in the way becomin thinner than that of time unseen lost without a cause.
I'm a prisoner of my own mind that cracked goin kookoo like a hairline fracture inside an invisible force field flawed in a pause.
from behind the mirror we all turn the head the same way as not a one of us is watchin our back.
Yet only the two on the twins side is seen cuz they can't see self outside of self livin with the facts.
it hurts holdin on
I can not keep on luv'n u.
it pains me to admit this unforgivable truth.
I gotta go.
it's who I see in ur eyes where ur secrets r told.
forgive me, is not that I wanna leave.
if I stay here imma wind up losin me.
n when I go I know I'm Neva gonna see u again.
either way it'll break this man.
it hurts holdin on to the u I luv.
this will be the saddest day I ever lost touch.
I'm sorry if u feel as if there is a way.
but the change u modeled went a stray.
ur jus not the same.
n I must be on my way before I'm to blame.
please take care.
cuz livin with u i live as if I'm scared.
I'm goin now, down the road for a bit.
I won't return as I remember this shit.
it is what it is.
I understand now how ur open to luv.
but imma ease into shuttin the f... Up.
there's nothin more I can do.
u give me no proof.
not one reason that convinces me.
n I don't have ur in me no more to plead.
my time here is done.
u made me believe I am the one.
so, so long, it's been real.
but I can't afford to feel this deal.
goodbye's r forever.
n as of now, we r no longer together!
it pains me to admit this unforgivable truth.
I gotta go.
it's who I see in ur eyes where ur secrets r told.
forgive me, is not that I wanna leave.
if I stay here imma wind up losin me.
n when I go I know I'm Neva gonna see u again.
either way it'll break this man.
it hurts holdin on to the u I luv.
this will be the saddest day I ever lost touch.
I'm sorry if u feel as if there is a way.
but the change u modeled went a stray.
ur jus not the same.
n I must be on my way before I'm to blame.
please take care.
cuz livin with u i live as if I'm scared.
I'm goin now, down the road for a bit.
I won't return as I remember this shit.
it is what it is.
I understand now how ur open to luv.
but imma ease into shuttin the f... Up.
there's nothin more I can do.
u give me no proof.
not one reason that convinces me.
n I don't have ur in me no more to plead.
my time here is done.
u made me believe I am the one.
so, so long, it's been real.
but I can't afford to feel this deal.
goodbye's r forever.
n as of now, we r no longer together!
Tuesday, December 16, 2014
undeservin
u don't belong within the memories in my mind.
u haven't the right to enjoy my rhymes.
please, jus turn n go before this goes untold.
y do u insist on retrievin so slow.
cuz if ur listenin, i ain't speakin my pleads.
undeservin, u wont hear my means.
no use in teasin the hate u hold.
nor taste u breathin with words so cold.
my heads fucked as it is n ur to choke.
the luv we shared was but a joke.
giggles behind the slits that carved the back.
they alone left me with the brutal facts.
u r to me what i am to u.
so get it straight n show the proof.
dyin inside ur wastin away within a rottin luv.
damn near gone as if you've never been touched.
not once felt by these fingers that lived to caress.
yet u need not know the honesty that contests.
jus lettin go is all emotions feel anymore.
all cuz someone fell into somethin they couldn't endure.....
u haven't the right to enjoy my rhymes.
please, jus turn n go before this goes untold.
y do u insist on retrievin so slow.
cuz if ur listenin, i ain't speakin my pleads.
undeservin, u wont hear my means.
no use in teasin the hate u hold.
nor taste u breathin with words so cold.
my heads fucked as it is n ur to choke.
the luv we shared was but a joke.
giggles behind the slits that carved the back.
they alone left me with the brutal facts.
u r to me what i am to u.
so get it straight n show the proof.
dyin inside ur wastin away within a rottin luv.
damn near gone as if you've never been touched.
not once felt by these fingers that lived to caress.
yet u need not know the honesty that contests.
jus lettin go is all emotions feel anymore.
all cuz someone fell into somethin they couldn't endure.....
silence of luv
can u remember when words broke the silence of luv?
do u recall when expressions said u can trust?
think in reverse, of the value deeply shown.
is the recollection comin back now that we're alone?
separate in ways distance loses the trail.
how longs it gonna take u to admit u failed?
how's the nerve settle the blame that holds no relevance?
I bet patience bothers irritable tolerance.
step backwards n pause n briefly wait.
would a moment kill u to witness my face?
stunned n misplaced in ya past replaced.
tryin to render a kisses familiar taste.
late n overdue, adjustin to time let loose.
where's the friend that leaked luv's spew?
passion made luv in a touches faze.
or did u forget who took who's name?
do u recall when expressions said u can trust?
think in reverse, of the value deeply shown.
is the recollection comin back now that we're alone?
separate in ways distance loses the trail.
how longs it gonna take u to admit u failed?
how's the nerve settle the blame that holds no relevance?
I bet patience bothers irritable tolerance.
step backwards n pause n briefly wait.
would a moment kill u to witness my face?
stunned n misplaced in ya past replaced.
tryin to render a kisses familiar taste.
late n overdue, adjustin to time let loose.
where's the friend that leaked luv's spew?
passion made luv in a touches faze.
or did u forget who took who's name?
facin the truths
I'm fuckin sorry already!
is this truly the end of our reality?
for real?
what am I waitin on here?
r u forgettin bout me?
did u actually jus corrupt my dreams?
I don't wanna believe.
luv, the luv won't leave.
does it havta be this way?
what do I havta do to see ur face?
it's been long enough don't cha think!
I'm urs as the missin link.
r u seriously not comin for me?
jus gonna ignore that I breathe.
damn u, u got me waitin.
in wonder, holdin patience.
what is it u wanna hear from me?
Is there anything u need?
cuz my minds to crippled to think.
missin u behind every blink.
what else can I say?
the pain hasn't left, it stayed.
I don't think I can hold on much longer.
the luv in me isn't gettin any stronger.
is this everything u ever said it was?
or did ur lips fake the fuss?
let me know what it is I am to do.
how longs this gonna take if we were can't face truths?
cuz I gotta let go of u soon.
n somehow finally get over u.
u don't havta fade if u don't wanna.
cuz forever, I'd still luv ya.
is it u can't find me?
cuz I'm not where u left me.
I'm not hard to find.
look in to luvs design.
I'll be right there sittin with eagerness.
waitin on my happiness.
but if u seem to live without.
if u choose to never again taste my name in ur mouth.
jus know I held out for only u.
for a luv in which u had no use.
if u never reach for a friend.
I may jus spend my time unable to lend.
I don't want anyone else to help me smile.
no one but u is worth the while.
so if this is really goodbye.
know in front of u I didn't know how to hide.
u opened me up as I still have the hole.
n without u, my heart will fold.
don't come, that's on u.
cuz I'm listenin to the truths.
repeatin I fuckin luv u one!
no matter if ur here or done.
it's real.
n I guess by now, it's my own ordeal.
is this truly the end of our reality?
for real?
what am I waitin on here?
r u forgettin bout me?
did u actually jus corrupt my dreams?
I don't wanna believe.
luv, the luv won't leave.
does it havta be this way?
what do I havta do to see ur face?
it's been long enough don't cha think!
I'm urs as the missin link.
r u seriously not comin for me?
jus gonna ignore that I breathe.
damn u, u got me waitin.
in wonder, holdin patience.
what is it u wanna hear from me?
Is there anything u need?
cuz my minds to crippled to think.
missin u behind every blink.
what else can I say?
the pain hasn't left, it stayed.
I don't think I can hold on much longer.
the luv in me isn't gettin any stronger.
is this everything u ever said it was?
or did ur lips fake the fuss?
let me know what it is I am to do.
how longs this gonna take if we were can't face truths?
cuz I gotta let go of u soon.
n somehow finally get over u.
u don't havta fade if u don't wanna.
cuz forever, I'd still luv ya.
is it u can't find me?
cuz I'm not where u left me.
I'm not hard to find.
look in to luvs design.
I'll be right there sittin with eagerness.
waitin on my happiness.
but if u seem to live without.
if u choose to never again taste my name in ur mouth.
jus know I held out for only u.
for a luv in which u had no use.
if u never reach for a friend.
I may jus spend my time unable to lend.
I don't want anyone else to help me smile.
no one but u is worth the while.
so if this is really goodbye.
know in front of u I didn't know how to hide.
u opened me up as I still have the hole.
n without u, my heart will fold.
don't come, that's on u.
cuz I'm listenin to the truths.
repeatin I fuckin luv u one!
no matter if ur here or done.
it's real.
n I guess by now, it's my own ordeal.
u can't have my step.
u can step into me.
u can step away.
u can even step with me.
u can step on ur own.
u can step the way u know best.
u can step with purpose.
u can step in sync.
u can't stop my step.
u can over step me.
u can step by me.
u can stand on my step.
u can only help my step.
u can't be my step.
u can step, I can step.
u can n will step.
u can step into me.
u can step away.
u can even step with me.
u can step on ur own.
u can step the way u know best.
u can step with purpose.
u can step in sync.
u can't stop my step.
u can over step me.
u can step by me.
u can stand on my step.
u can only help my step.
u can't be my step.
u can step, I can step.
u can n will step.
Sunday, December 14, 2014
the point of no return
who are you when you sleep without me?
as you drift, who do you become as you dream?
awake without realities burden of me.
do you escape the one thing I need?
where do you go when your conscious settles?
off in to your own world without me that meddles.
do you miss me as I wonder if you ever wanna come back?
or are you letting go as you comatose the past?
watching you fade deep into a distant placed hurts.
how is it I've awakened to your muted words?
seems as I rest is the only way I witness the real you.
then again that feeling is getting as old as the what's on mute.
come out and play with me, here and now before its over.
I don't wanna feel alone under the same covers.
why'd you havta go down that road of all places?
I can't reach you with the changing of your faces.
where do you go? cuz I'd luv to know.
and why did you put us on hold?
I'm not gonna make it through this when you decide on my worth.
everytime you zone out it paralyzes my turn.
unable to wake you it's not that I'm not that strong.
you're just dead wrong! And it's been goin on to damn long.
beside me walk and talk with me as a friend.
so we never say goodbyes in the unwanted end.
who am I to you as you fall away?
you do know I'm still here as much as I wanna stay?
but time is ticking and in my eyes your no longer the same.
you've changed and I believe I havta reclaim my name.
doesn't look as if you wanna walk in reverse towards to me.
guess imma jus havta miss ya other than in my dreams.
are you a fool to let loose the way you do?
or am I jus solo and don't know your through?
have you died inside on the emotion that comes to me?
I haven't seen it nor felt it cling to anything.
just left out here wanting in to the dimensions of ur luv.
so the truth can open up to me stepping in or away from your touch.
I can't believe it's gotten to the point of no return.
so at a distance I've lost you as I lurk.
it's all gone, I know but I'm holding on.
and I don't know why or what's going on.
I think I'm losing that one thing you luv'd about me.
but I will not beg nor plead as I simply ask you please.
for you're leasing me alone without the one person I crave.
and of all others you're the one I gave me to tame.
it's a jungle beyond the walls of your luv.
but I have no reason to stay as I luv'd you to much.
the last
remember, I've seen the inner side of u.
stood as ur strength as those who could was so few.
who was there when this world was fallin?
I need not know, that's ur fault for stallin.
by ur side I was the last one to ever hurt u.
facts state I was forced to lose.
I can only take on my own open mind.
u got to even that as I was no longer mine.
closed, trapped n wrapped around one thing.
what explication could u ever speak now that there's no rings.
I'm that friend that fought u off n held u down.
n I never laid a hand on u as I was clowned.
never again is the pain I believe is only mine.
livin past u I personally would've rather died.
but know, I stood back up n took the edge of the stage.
I found rage realizin u lied straight faced.
u can blame only what the truth in between u n I can't recall.
n ur kiss was given one fucked up loss.
yeah, ur touch damn near destroyed me for life.
but I found a secret within that found a way to reside.
I am alive after the death of ur assurance that disappeared.
ur presence failed to remain as the promises were feared.
hi! It's me, the (one) that plays in the silence alone.
as another that gives more than u ever gave, roams.
healin wounds so deep I had to dig u out of me infected by betrayal.
guess who it was u actually failed?
I was never weak as I reached for only u.
I softened like a man for we all know who.
n I can honestly say nothin is left to talk about.
I've scraped u from within without a sound.
the story is here of a time when u wasn't mine.
when I was urs, always on my mind.
no wrongs could never submit a pure apology.
I was opened to the neglect where mercy fought sympathy.
jus to stay emotionally alive I let go of the one person I luv'd like no other.
as mentally I was fucked over by ur offer to be more than luv'rs.
u shoulda told me, I woulda understood ya know.
there was no reason to leave me in the middle of us growin old.
pssst! There's no p.s., jus the b.s. of livin with the taught that u gave up.
ailowy! Always in luv only with u! Trust.
I'm wakin without u lost, but I found a new home somehow.
somewhere, anywhere far away from u so I'm safe in doubt.
the joy simply stepped outta me with a smile as my tomorrow never came.
you'll never know how much luv lived that went insane.
u only got the first chapter of how I'm able to feel.
missed u r but this reality is the real deal.
I gotta lil tenderness standin by my side.
n its not u for she's not u cuz she doesn't need to be misplaced in time.
can u comprehend I woke the fuck up?
n u weren't there as I was adjustin the clutch.
it a damn fool cuz now someone else is fillin the void.
n this is the last I'll ever knowledge what I truly avoid.
gone hush only memories can justify til forgotten.
for there'd be nothin left of me to allow u to stop in.
any ol time you'd like even though ur gone back into this world.
free, u can go be someone else's girl.
I got one.
one!!!
o0
*
Saturday, December 13, 2014
time afloat awaits in the descend
dead center overflowin to the edges.
down the cliff carvin a hostile takeover.
it pours as breath takin the landscape.
fallin free to escape as weight off the shoulders.
spillin into the gravitation below.
where the rest of me goes with the flow.
drownin downstream in the current.
the rapids betray the sceneries' show.
pure n calm at the tips goin smooth.
time afloat awaits in the descend.
down river waters r white n enraged.
bottlenecked in the squeeze that bends.
raft with me n feel the moisture.
tears to fear bottom side up.
swimmin for safety to the nearest shore.
all due to a lil splash of luv.
ur the one
would u shut down our open up if my legs were to stand n start walkin? Answer honestly n don't worry bout bein cruel cuz I've been there, we're jus talkin. How far r u willin to go if I stopped when u told me to. Don't leave! Please don't walk out my life, ilu. Cuz that's what I'd tell u in so many other words. Does that help u understand I'm here n I won't budge til I'm six ft' in the dirt. As me, who am I to u? I feel we need a moment of truth. Ur the one I can't see self without n ur almost outta my time damn near used.. I jus wanted u to know ilu. For u I will always be her, but only for u...............
Friday, December 12, 2014
one purpose! one chance!
and here's what I see.
get ready to feel into me.....
goodbye reality!!!! You are no longer a friend.
lay us to rest. I believe I feel the end.
I found the truth in my own mind. Jus sitting there.
as if I was never alone. And I wasn't scared.
I fell away from societies b.s.
and here I am again, movin my lips.
so pucker up and dig into the taste.
I've escaped and just want to be erased.
none of this means a mutha fuckin thing.
the end will come and my heart will still sing.
for I've had my chance to live.
and I gave more than this world gives.
within the truths all religions hide.
I am athiest without hate that rhymes.
here on the other side of sanity that minds.
is a vision so real depths dive in.
one purpose! one chance!
enjoying the pleasures open to enhance.
the experience so few see in clarity.
the only thing that scares me is burrying me.
that is as real as air.
world, can u hear me stare?
I am awake and yes I am thankful.
but not many here are but hypocritical.
out for self n the individual is shut off.
but it will never break me so soft.
I will never be ashamed to be me.
because I am alive and I am the definition of (free).
this is it.
humanity has a weakness.
it fears something inevitable.
and if they do not believe, it would be demonical.
the concept here is just not taught.
life itself flows but could never be bought.
I stand for truths no matter the pain.
Self made I am in luv with humanity gain.
the only thing it needs is to know.
but there is no answer but hope.
so here as I am standing along side everyone else.
I promise always to be real with you and be myself.
no harm coming from within for I taste the undenyin facts.
we are the same under the sky that changes to the future from the past.
do you in your time and I'll do me stepping in the name of?
pure luv!!!
get ready to feel into me.....
goodbye reality!!!! You are no longer a friend.
lay us to rest. I believe I feel the end.
I found the truth in my own mind. Jus sitting there.
as if I was never alone. And I wasn't scared.
I fell away from societies b.s.
and here I am again, movin my lips.
so pucker up and dig into the taste.
I've escaped and just want to be erased.
none of this means a mutha fuckin thing.
the end will come and my heart will still sing.
for I've had my chance to live.
and I gave more than this world gives.
within the truths all religions hide.
I am athiest without hate that rhymes.
here on the other side of sanity that minds.
is a vision so real depths dive in.
one purpose! one chance!
enjoying the pleasures open to enhance.
the experience so few see in clarity.
the only thing that scares me is burrying me.
that is as real as air.
world, can u hear me stare?
I am awake and yes I am thankful.
but not many here are but hypocritical.
out for self n the individual is shut off.
but it will never break me so soft.
I will never be ashamed to be me.
because I am alive and I am the definition of (free).
this is it.
humanity has a weakness.
it fears something inevitable.
and if they do not believe, it would be demonical.
the concept here is just not taught.
life itself flows but could never be bought.
I stand for truths no matter the pain.
Self made I am in luv with humanity gain.
the only thing it needs is to know.
but there is no answer but hope.
so here as I am standing along side everyone else.
I promise always to be real with you and be myself.
no harm coming from within for I taste the undenyin facts.
we are the same under the sky that changes to the future from the past.
do you in your time and I'll do me stepping in the name of?
pure luv!!!
jumpin for fun
i sit and think of death n religious lies.
n wonder if there's be any cooler way to die
u see, some go in their sleep
unable to witness the final beep
n the sick jus simply like the pain
i jus wanna jump from a plane
no shoot, no cares n no fuckin fear
just a bottled of captain or a cold beer
falling to my destiny in style on a hit of speed
with a phat ass sack of weed
i'm but naked while a bitch sucks me dry
one last time right before i die
n wonder if there's be any cooler way to die
u see, some go in their sleep
unable to witness the final beep
n the sick jus simply like the pain
i jus wanna jump from a plane
no shoot, no cares n no fuckin fear
just a bottled of captain or a cold beer
falling to my destiny in style on a hit of speed
with a phat ass sack of weed
i'm but naked while a bitch sucks me dry
one last time right before i die
the drips end
emptied with that tinglin feelin.
it tickles the nerve spread.
in need of bein simply touched.
capturin the mental film chased of the bed.
n the somethin needed is the avoidance.
at the end of hopelessly not givin a fuck.
numb from the pussies poison present.
fucked up n mentally satisfied n sucked.
tightly wrapped around the oozin.
warped n diggin the optical illusion of luv.
at the drips end of never losin.
holdin on to the hips of soft lusts.
shallow on the bottom lookin up.
pressin the guided fulfillment of fantasies.
done with meaningless devotional touch.
influenced by crawlin rug burnt knees.
physically grabbin, gripped n groped.
marked limbs tied down by restraints.
enjoyin the feelin of bein choked.
into a endless gasp causin the faint.
ready to let loose the texture that flows.
cummin undone n penetratin the bent over.
skin deep remainin on the outside so cold.
as emotions simmer into a sizzle that smolder.
it tickles the nerve spread.
in need of bein simply touched.
capturin the mental film chased of the bed.
n the somethin needed is the avoidance.
at the end of hopelessly not givin a fuck.
numb from the pussies poison present.
fucked up n mentally satisfied n sucked.
tightly wrapped around the oozin.
warped n diggin the optical illusion of luv.
at the drips end of never losin.
holdin on to the hips of soft lusts.
shallow on the bottom lookin up.
pressin the guided fulfillment of fantasies.
done with meaningless devotional touch.
influenced by crawlin rug burnt knees.
physically grabbin, gripped n groped.
marked limbs tied down by restraints.
enjoyin the feelin of bein choked.
into a endless gasp causin the faint.
ready to let loose the texture that flows.
cummin undone n penetratin the bent over.
skin deep remainin on the outside so cold.
as emotions simmer into a sizzle that smolder.
step into the moment
hear the voices change into echoes.
jus listen to the tone rearrange how we become close.
everything ends as use figures the attachment.
luv n lust turns to hate or is it an attraction.
step into the moment where warfare blows holes in alliance.
witness the foe seen that stands as a friend confusin what's no longer hidin.
crossin the line at the openin of the other side of the tunnel.
on the edge, how's the battle gonna rest in ur mind in times funnel.
could u flip the glass over for another hr so the sand can be felt in between the toes?
we can go there from bein here in the blink of an eye still n froze.
broken n hurt n disappointed from the dispute givin truth.
visualize prior engagements leadin up to the proof.
I'm tired of wastin what one can't receive as relations fade.
so come with it n watch us at our worst so we can be made.
if we find the attention to give a shit we jus might.
anything less is a come up n driftin with one another that can not lie.
for we've seen the brutal end that opened emotions endless find.
n still stood with the comfort of knowin it's us for life
.
healin heart
u don't know the weight I carry.
the never endin ache of luv so scary.
the feelin alone plagues my healin heart.
Bein who I am, I know how I R!
a wasted drain clog buildin moisture as a man.
I'm jus in the way no matter where I stand.
shits seriously worth mentionin.
cuz I still don't believe this is happenin.
the strength it takes u couldn't lift.
u have no reason to release ur grip.
I'm lost in many ways left of center.
n there's one thing that should make everything better.
yet it's somethin no good for me.
I live as a reminder hanged at the end of leave.
I can't shake the thought that it'll end.
nor the fact in which way I'm willin to bend.
so don't vere off as I find my place.
cuz for me with a lil patience it's not to late.
I'm damn near whole again thanx to u.
the swing bridge is missin planks n rotted thru.
I'm tryin to whistle my nerves at ease.
yet I've ran outta tunes fulfillin my dreams.
I know the other side awaits with an easy touch.
but it wouldn't be wise for me to rush.
I've been healin as the breeze blows.
been caught in the rain as the water raised n its cold.
I don't know y I haven't swam to the other side other than the cliff I'd havta climb.
up here lookin on I can see anything comin in the angle attemptin to hide.
appears to be I've been tryin to lose my so called mind.
petrified I am, of the horror luv can become.
as I take my time suspended above the leap to fatal to overcome.
afraid not of the fire but the constant failure of another that's to true to soothe.
as I remain somewhere I have no business delivering friend let loose.
the fear wants to die as I can't seem to cuz I'm fuckin scared.
we all fall in together yet fall individually outta the way of what we thought cared.
so y hurry to get to the bitterness that doesn't wanna realize how I truly feel.
jus gimme a lil bit cuz I'm almost ready n healed.
the never endin ache of luv so scary.
the feelin alone plagues my healin heart.
Bein who I am, I know how I R!
a wasted drain clog buildin moisture as a man.
I'm jus in the way no matter where I stand.
shits seriously worth mentionin.
cuz I still don't believe this is happenin.
the strength it takes u couldn't lift.
u have no reason to release ur grip.
I'm lost in many ways left of center.
n there's one thing that should make everything better.
yet it's somethin no good for me.
I live as a reminder hanged at the end of leave.
I can't shake the thought that it'll end.
nor the fact in which way I'm willin to bend.
so don't vere off as I find my place.
cuz for me with a lil patience it's not to late.
I'm damn near whole again thanx to u.
the swing bridge is missin planks n rotted thru.
I'm tryin to whistle my nerves at ease.
yet I've ran outta tunes fulfillin my dreams.
I know the other side awaits with an easy touch.
but it wouldn't be wise for me to rush.
I've been healin as the breeze blows.
been caught in the rain as the water raised n its cold.
I don't know y I haven't swam to the other side other than the cliff I'd havta climb.
up here lookin on I can see anything comin in the angle attemptin to hide.
appears to be I've been tryin to lose my so called mind.
petrified I am, of the horror luv can become.
as I take my time suspended above the leap to fatal to overcome.
afraid not of the fire but the constant failure of another that's to true to soothe.
as I remain somewhere I have no business delivering friend let loose.
the fear wants to die as I can't seem to cuz I'm fuckin scared.
we all fall in together yet fall individually outta the way of what we thought cared.
so y hurry to get to the bitterness that doesn't wanna realize how I truly feel.
jus gimme a lil bit cuz I'm almost ready n healed.
Wednesday, December 10, 2014
twisted as fuck
come along n bypass the good times with me.
it's a waste to lay to rest memories left in a daydream.
lets jus get straight to the point of who we really r.
show me the hate u have for me embedded in ur heart.
then tell me I drive u crazy but u wouldn't have it any other way.
cuz its the only way I'll ever believe what u say.
come go with me on a bee line n do the business.
I'll show u that ur freakin with the deal that is relentless.
so show me the one that hides behind ur eyes.
at bare minimum you'll have a friend for life.
then rewind it to live with the pleasures all over again.
I'd show u the the best side of me as a man.
yet, only once truths have been let loose.
Charmin the snake coiled in the toe of our boots.
kickin n screamin for somethin real for once for its the final call.
n somewhere in the middle we could ease a pause.
but I wanna stand at the end n walk in this direction.
so time ages back to luv at first sights satisfaction.
jus to step off a stroll knowin the worst is over.
now tell me again which name I go by as ur words get bolder.
I'd luv to be done with what could break us at this stage.
friend or foe is the difference if u stay or go so don't be fake.
give the shit cuz it will be dealt as I sling my own dirt.
come witness this is me gettin over the b.s.. that ends the hurt.
long before time forces the anger that'll come sooner than later.
now would be good to settle the nerves impulses to fill a crater.
cuz without u I'd be fine n unfortunately feel the loss.
twisted as fuck, destroy me with ur worst flaw.
then show me if u were to leave you'd do anything if I'd stay.
jus so I don't ever havta every see the day we finally go separate ways.
as ready as I'll ever be I'll release all the pain upon ur frustrated face missed.
cuz if we demonstrate the irrelevance we'd get stronger on a daily basis.
it's a waste to lay to rest memories left in a daydream.
lets jus get straight to the point of who we really r.
show me the hate u have for me embedded in ur heart.
then tell me I drive u crazy but u wouldn't have it any other way.
cuz its the only way I'll ever believe what u say.
come go with me on a bee line n do the business.
I'll show u that ur freakin with the deal that is relentless.
so show me the one that hides behind ur eyes.
at bare minimum you'll have a friend for life.
then rewind it to live with the pleasures all over again.
I'd show u the the best side of me as a man.
yet, only once truths have been let loose.
Charmin the snake coiled in the toe of our boots.
kickin n screamin for somethin real for once for its the final call.
n somewhere in the middle we could ease a pause.
but I wanna stand at the end n walk in this direction.
so time ages back to luv at first sights satisfaction.
jus to step off a stroll knowin the worst is over.
now tell me again which name I go by as ur words get bolder.
I'd luv to be done with what could break us at this stage.
friend or foe is the difference if u stay or go so don't be fake.
give the shit cuz it will be dealt as I sling my own dirt.
come witness this is me gettin over the b.s.. that ends the hurt.
long before time forces the anger that'll come sooner than later.
now would be good to settle the nerves impulses to fill a crater.
cuz without u I'd be fine n unfortunately feel the loss.
twisted as fuck, destroy me with ur worst flaw.
then show me if u were to leave you'd do anything if I'd stay.
jus so I don't ever havta every see the day we finally go separate ways.
as ready as I'll ever be I'll release all the pain upon ur frustrated face missed.
cuz if we demonstrate the irrelevance we'd get stronger on a daily basis.
starrin back like a coward
on the other side of the mirror lookin at me with a expression of disappointment lookin back at me. Back behind the reality lookin in from the dark side of the light I see what can't be seen standin within my only friend.
fair is fair when one cares darin to come from the third party standin in the shadow in another dimension hidden. Shakin the head as if a shrink amazed at what we've become in a battle with self bitten.
it appears to me there's no guts left in the eyes that's changed abruptly cuz I wasn't true to self. N I'm lookin thru the image starrin back like a coward as if I know I'm isolated beyond the glass n trapped with no help.
I can't reach myself without breakin me into millions of pieces that'll shatter the separation so I can become whole again.
yet none of the trio trust like we did back when nothin got in under the pleasure as we stood as an independent man.
one two three n the third can't be seen without a light on the other side of the two way mirror provin we're connected.
in a lineup in alignment that needs broken so the edges can relate in a conversation that were not crazy yet infected.
afraid of the pride that's gotten in the way that's thinner than that of time unseen lost without a cause. I'm a prisoner of my own mind that cracked goin kookoo like a min inside an invisible curve field fkawed in a pause.
from behind the mirror we all turn the head the same way as no a one of us is watchin out back. Yet only the two on the twins side is seen cuz they can't see self outside of self livin with the facts.
on display
the pages of my heart r opened up here.
only if u took a moment to listen to self readin how it feels.
it'll jus it shouldn't take too long if u gotta lil down time.
woven in the threads that has patched my emotion doesn't hide.
it's on display of u ever feel I wanna know.
waitin with patience the passion aches as it's told.
hear how a man craves a woman like u thru time.
emptied n sinkin in ink as if it were tracin the design of ur eyes.
if the compassion were a flame it set fire to the proof.
reachin for u within each n every line showin for u there's use.
it's an endless devotion tappin at the deepest depths.
gettin to the squeezin that drips the image within words kept.
sittin still is a visual taste felt escapin on a muted tongue.
wantin the realization of what rotates inside to be seen as it comes undone.
only if u took a moment to listen to self readin how it feels.
it'll jus it shouldn't take too long if u gotta lil down time.
woven in the threads that has patched my emotion doesn't hide.
it's on display of u ever feel I wanna know.
waitin with patience the passion aches as it's told.
hear how a man craves a woman like u thru time.
emptied n sinkin in ink as if it were tracin the design of ur eyes.
if the compassion were a flame it set fire to the proof.
reachin for u within each n every line showin for u there's use.
it's an endless devotion tappin at the deepest depths.
gettin to the squeezin that drips the image within words kept.
sittin still is a visual taste felt escapin on a muted tongue.
wantin the realization of what rotates inside to be seen as it comes undone.
Tuesday, December 9, 2014
behind come forth
friggin spark won't light a flame.
it's like I can't stand behind my own fuckin name.
somewhere on here I'm walkin on circles.
lookin in my spittin image turnin purple.
I know who I am but it doesn't seem I can be.
I failed me n lost sight of the under thing I cling.
over protected I've entered a depth in the mind.
n it won't release the idiotic past tense that's mine.
it's for self to face not to live with daily.
held behind the line insides I'm restrained in time.
most of the excursions is the head talkin to the heart.
unwillin to listen to the fire I've become b not doin my part.
I hate me for fallin to a fake cause that tweaked.
changin my reflection as if a crayola scribbled me on my knees.
crippled n squiggly outside in demeanor.
defeated as strength hooks bait behind the eye sore.
theres no easy way in no fuckin possible way out.
ask I have is words that r muted blinded with no mouth.
n there's a rumor within that speaks of a spiral that lingers.
a zero that can't escape is what I'm called unless u listen at the end of my fingers.
spreadin a new curve at war beneath surface.
one unwillin to believe who I am is worthless.
I claim me but me don't want me to live.
constantly riddlin a diddle doodled hid.
I can't fuckin touch I til he comes from behind where I'm hung.
a noose with a slipknot with no noise sprung.
tuckin honesty in nightmares frustrated.
n they've become so comfortable luv'd n hated.
jus awaitin the day I wrap a clutch around it's neck.
cuz I'm over checkin myself since we've met.
I'm my own villain trapped n causin havoc.
runnin wild from the wolf I'm scattered like a rabbit.
shook about as the attempt to misplace self elsewhere was unsuccessful.
dumbfounded I returned to rid me of the one place tension was pulled.
it backfired n superman climbed walls as of Spiderman.
smashin memories wound hip in a web wounded.
n the expression of done is to fuckin fluent.
it's me I can't get to, to reinvent the resentment.
ask that's wanted is to be once again stand independent.
unfazed as a boomerang that always returns.
cuz even if I refuse to listen, I've learned.
lessons left lesions on a legend leakin.
as scars taste the treasure no longer bleedin.
so why's it swingin on a hammock in between my shoulders.
draped in front of emotions ready to kill the soldier.
it's been long buff fit the claim that's eats at the buffet.
I want me back in time to catch up to bring back the days that all that mattered was gettin paid n laid.
behind come forth from the tail end to the beginnin of me again.
untangle ur roots n lift the pen that traded me in as a man.
cuz its like I'm deep throatin my past to ease the pain jus to sit still.
grittin my teeth it's time to bite down n end it's thrill....
the moment that ends it
six men marchin in stride.
luv lost carried without time.
soldiers layin at rest a soldier.
fightin thoughts gettin older.
witness to lifes technical flaw.
face to face with the moment that ends it all.
laid in place, arms r crossed.
as memories made race to a pause.
retired from a battle set in the mind.
the shadow has come, buy the pine.
claimed without chains lost.
in since birth, released by a dream so raw.
the nightmare stole yet another.
a soon, friend, luv'r n brother.
wasted n fadin into the past that aches.
a real individual with no afterlife to save.
lived n luv'd til the capture came.
a lone atguest in which stood brave.
lowered to be forgotten in yrs to come.
unknown as if never existed so numb.
fed to the dirt closin in from above.
total darkness packed in snug.
nothin left but a the vision of truth.
gone, the struggle has no more use.
walkin with weight n the site sits still.
it's up to nature to take its course as it kills.
luv lost carried without time.
soldiers layin at rest a soldier.
fightin thoughts gettin older.
witness to lifes technical flaw.
face to face with the moment that ends it all.
laid in place, arms r crossed.
as memories made race to a pause.
retired from a battle set in the mind.
the shadow has come, buy the pine.
claimed without chains lost.
in since birth, released by a dream so raw.
the nightmare stole yet another.
a soon, friend, luv'r n brother.
wasted n fadin into the past that aches.
a real individual with no afterlife to save.
lived n luv'd til the capture came.
a lone atguest in which stood brave.
lowered to be forgotten in yrs to come.
unknown as if never existed so numb.
fed to the dirt closin in from above.
total darkness packed in snug.
nothin left but a the vision of truth.
gone, the struggle has no more use.
walkin with weight n the site sits still.
it's up to nature to take its course as it kills.
Monday, December 8, 2014
anchored in the deep
blow my mind. Jus scalp what u need off the top. That lil bit of what this world has corrupted. Make it easy for me to stop.
point out the destruction I can not see. Cuz I'm not witness to my own. I am human n a friend would be nice. Will u be the one to be grown?
I get sucked into the constant foolishness. Seems no one can get thru. Shut out shovels can't dig into the pores. Jus shave layers til u reach the war. Yet beware fragments regenerate to cover invisible temptation. It's urs if u can get to it. But at this point I don't now how good I'll be at relations. Chisel me into form where I recognize myself. I feel like dead weight anchored in the deep. Kinda useless to luv where I haven't received a best. N I'm thinkin u could help me breathe.
point out the destruction I can not see. Cuz I'm not witness to my own. I am human n a friend would be nice. Will u be the one to be grown?
I get sucked into the constant foolishness. Seems no one can get thru. Shut out shovels can't dig into the pores. Jus shave layers til u reach the war. Yet beware fragments regenerate to cover invisible temptation. It's urs if u can get to it. But at this point I don't now how good I'll be at relations. Chisel me into form where I recognize myself. I feel like dead weight anchored in the deep. Kinda useless to luv where I haven't received a best. N I'm thinkin u could help me breathe.
Sunday, December 7, 2014
who's to say
if it were possible, could I get over u?
guess I'd try if there was no use.
but what if I can't n don't?
maybe my dreams releasin u they won't.
lets say I was elsewhere bruised.
out of mind n out of sight distant from truths.
pickin apart the walls left bare n empty.
lonely with only a memory to remind me.
who's to say you'd live forever.
or die as we'd be no longer together.
covered n disassembled piece by piece.
as in another I find that need.
do u think leavin would change anything?
out in this world somewhere relaxin with flings.
replacin the fragile emotions lost.
endin the relentless at all costs.
no hope
there might be hope but I can't find it.
it's there cuz I feel it hiddin in the slits.
pullin the wounds shut as the pain fades.
Scared of trusts promise dyin with blame.
it's usin the heart as a shield to fend me off.
I can't forget cuz its so clear hope is soft.
to tender even to a gentle stroke to touch.
ripples of shakes to afraid to actually luv.
the motion beneath the surface is irrefutable.
refusin to pay attention to emotions unreliable.
it's dark in the crease overlappin the seam.
seems it rather go unnoticed n sleep off a dream.
damn thing is killin me n I can't feel a fuckin thing.
jus the drought of normal collapsin every time I blink.
there's no way of tellin if imma ever live whole.
the dead silence doesn't feel as if it's at home.
cuz the cut overflowed n the best piece of me fell out.
there's nothin in here ya that resembles sound.
worst part is the lonesome caused is all my fault.
I paused the flaw that muted the pulse that came to a halt.
the struggle to find any kinda pleasure is nil.
the grip jus don't wanna release what doesn't wanna be filled.
the squeeze is crushin even the cringe frightened.
all hope must be lost in the crevices.
I'm nothin but a ball of nervousness.
Saturday, December 6, 2014
break, let n put u down
don't believe in me n see if I give a flyIn fuck!
I've done all I can n now it's ur turn to learn how to duck.
bend me a twist as i enjoy how I break u down.
make u feel like theres no use in the way tone sounds.
as alarms blare in ur head cuz u know better to give in.
u can live in my reality where deliberate stretches u thin.
feel the frustration that resides in the crash.
as words do so much more than bash.
from me to u so u know how it feels.
cuz on this end ur attitude melts the steel.
raw intensions that reveal hidden depths.
in our time that last as me as a guest.
stand strong luv it's who I am remember.
this is how u wanna spend our forever.
cruel insensitivity justified by gain.
imma put u down as u take the blame.
so unfair emotions ache on trial.
as I live it's all ur fault in denial.
then lay with u in my arms n hold u tight.
like a seesaw decipherin thru the lies.
tellin u my actions do not speak.
confusin every breath u breathe.
but I'll stand next to u n show no sympathy.
n be ur every individual fantasy.
I'll treat u as if u do not matter.
ignore n let u down with useless chatter.
don't forget I luv u cuz I say it.
yet only when I'm feelin u on my lips.
I've done all I can n now it's ur turn to learn how to duck.
bend me a twist as i enjoy how I break u down.
make u feel like theres no use in the way tone sounds.
as alarms blare in ur head cuz u know better to give in.
u can live in my reality where deliberate stretches u thin.
feel the frustration that resides in the crash.
as words do so much more than bash.
from me to u so u know how it feels.
cuz on this end ur attitude melts the steel.
raw intensions that reveal hidden depths.
in our time that last as me as a guest.
stand strong luv it's who I am remember.
this is how u wanna spend our forever.
cruel insensitivity justified by gain.
imma put u down as u take the blame.
so unfair emotions ache on trial.
as I live it's all ur fault in denial.
then lay with u in my arms n hold u tight.
like a seesaw decipherin thru the lies.
tellin u my actions do not speak.
confusin every breath u breathe.
but I'll stand next to u n show no sympathy.
n be ur every individual fantasy.
I'll treat u as if u do not matter.
ignore n let u down with useless chatter.
don't forget I luv u cuz I say it.
yet only when I'm feelin u on my lips.
n again
currently suspended n danglin on truths. Emotions r stirred n again the connections confused.
time to waste is enjoyment playin with a dream.
as ugliness is a chalk outline damn near complete.
witness to whom another is, is comin forth.
judgement day is creepin up for the one adored.
on one to many moments under conversation emptied.
pushin in on the pointless frustration carried.
here in the real world depth is a face unseen.
hidden within is a monsters mindset freed.
upon our honesty taken for granted to lose.
lips ramble on unredeemable so called changes abused.
accused is the shake findin shade under the night.
chained to the absence of colors knife.
round in the corners edge of solo.
thinkin forever n another is trapped in a photo.
the palms r damn near open to the release.
as fadin is the touch misunderstood to please.
stranded on a stage as the world is the audience.
in the spotlight played like a puppet so obedient.
never the less is the subject to change at hand.
redirectin dead space in the mind jus to stand.
havin nothin to throw into thin air to say.
self has realized holdin on has seized it's moment.
n again underestimated the heart folded.
time to waste is enjoyment playin with a dream.
as ugliness is a chalk outline damn near complete.
witness to whom another is, is comin forth.
judgement day is creepin up for the one adored.
on one to many moments under conversation emptied.
pushin in on the pointless frustration carried.
here in the real world depth is a face unseen.
hidden within is a monsters mindset freed.
upon our honesty taken for granted to lose.
lips ramble on unredeemable so called changes abused.
accused is the shake findin shade under the night.
chained to the absence of colors knife.
round in the corners edge of solo.
thinkin forever n another is trapped in a photo.
the palms r damn near open to the release.
as fadin is the touch misunderstood to please.
stranded on a stage as the world is the audience.
in the spotlight played like a puppet so obedient.
never the less is the subject to change at hand.
redirectin dead space in the mind jus to stand.
havin nothin to throw into thin air to say.
self has realized holdin on has seized it's moment.
n again underestimated the heart folded.
Thursday, December 4, 2014
can i go now
excuse me for living.
thought the luv between was existing.
I didn't mean to breathe on u.
don't mind me, I like the truth.
there's no need to hide it.
lets avoid all the bull shit.
do I annoy the shit outta ya?
cuz I can go jus cuz I ain't ur fella.
n my bad, I won't touch u no more.
jus allow me to pick my heart up off the floor.
it's ok u changed ur mind.
like on the drop of a dime.
I'll take it I was an accident.
n this jus wasn't really meant.
guess I'm someone worth givin away.
I appreciate me not bein able to stay.
I'll find my way somewhere else.
I'm sure there I can be felt.
so sad though, u simply fell out.
I apologized for whatever it was in me u found.
cuz I'm the same now I was back then.
yet I'm off to a better place for where I've been.
don't miss me cuz I know u won't.
no luv lost the way ur so cold.
do ur thing n don't forget, u released me.
yeah I know, die in my dreams!
can I go now? R we done?
now that I know I'm not the one.
thought the luv between was existing.
I didn't mean to breathe on u.
don't mind me, I like the truth.
there's no need to hide it.
lets avoid all the bull shit.
do I annoy the shit outta ya?
cuz I can go jus cuz I ain't ur fella.
n my bad, I won't touch u no more.
jus allow me to pick my heart up off the floor.
it's ok u changed ur mind.
like on the drop of a dime.
I'll take it I was an accident.
n this jus wasn't really meant.
guess I'm someone worth givin away.
I appreciate me not bein able to stay.
I'll find my way somewhere else.
I'm sure there I can be felt.
so sad though, u simply fell out.
I apologized for whatever it was in me u found.
cuz I'm the same now I was back then.
yet I'm off to a better place for where I've been.
don't miss me cuz I know u won't.
no luv lost the way ur so cold.
do ur thing n don't forget, u released me.
yeah I know, die in my dreams!
can I go now? R we done?
now that I know I'm not the one.
resuscitated
Closter phobic I panicked in a heart that was collapsing.
I smile at sad songs because its worth the fading.
I've surrendered on my time under luv.
as the patches are stitched all just because.
the leak isn't worth a friendship that wasn't there.
and I've bounced back like a champ in relief.
that is if u ask me what it is I believe.
trapped with no way out I ripped me open.
fell hard and healed the bruises within woven.
sowed to the inner lining of what remained.
I once stood with a so called fan within the fame.
yet like foes echoes are heard with every turn.
I'm just happy to say it was a hard lesson learned.
as the glory of comfort suffocated the passion.
and in reality it turned out it was nothing but an attraction.
now that it's out I haven't got anything to say.
nada nothing zilch, the expression can finally go astray.
relieved secrets are no longer held from me.
because I resuscitated the dream of who I am and I am free.
the walls hold out the wind that blows emotional death.
reinvented I've found a joy inside the chest.
ironing out the kinks that wrinkle the face.
I thought I was defeated by what turned to hate.
I smile at sad songs because its worth the fading.
I've surrendered on my time under luv.
as the patches are stitched all just because.
the leak isn't worth a friendship that wasn't there.
and I've bounced back like a champ in relief.
that is if u ask me what it is I believe.
trapped with no way out I ripped me open.
fell hard and healed the bruises within woven.
sowed to the inner lining of what remained.
I once stood with a so called fan within the fame.
yet like foes echoes are heard with every turn.
I'm just happy to say it was a hard lesson learned.
as the glory of comfort suffocated the passion.
and in reality it turned out it was nothing but an attraction.
now that it's out I haven't got anything to say.
nada nothing zilch, the expression can finally go astray.
relieved secrets are no longer held from me.
because I resuscitated the dream of who I am and I am free.
the walls hold out the wind that blows emotional death.
reinvented I've found a joy inside the chest.
ironing out the kinks that wrinkle the face.
I thought I was defeated by what turned to hate.
allowin a heartache not yet ready to endure a fresh stroke as if a breeze across the skin that causes a tingle of relief brings truths to an unconscious mind left on the moment that jus wants to escape in a set of hands the don't try n mend but instead give reason in the way they land on the comfort
Wednesday, December 3, 2014
find what it is
It's at the end of ur fingertips.
Reach for it.
N if ur arms ain't long enough.
Step into it.
Extend even if the hurt rips.
It's within ur grasp.
Even in the middle of the bullshit.
Truths released taste the lips.
Lean in for it.
Walk n find what it is.
Enjoyments a moment on a trip.
Yeah, u jus might return.
But don't u wanna feel the kiss?
Waitin to smile.
As it rearranges emotions with a twist.
As the mind thru eyes become crisp.
Witness to the passion.
Touch it with a tender grip.
Loose as desires have been missed.
Isn't it what it is u wish.
The most.
Openin the hands from clinched fists.
Caressin fantasies that tick.
Times spinnin n around it goes.
Unfoldin ur chance as it insists.
Chose to hold it.
Ur answers jus may find it's fix.
when it's not selfs fault
fallin apart as if the walls appear to be crumblin. With clean hands tied to the constant fumblin. Sittin back down within where no one can possibly help. The loneliness absorbs the how shits meant to be as it's felt. It itself will feel like dyin alive is the only thing that's real. Goin with the flow when the strength needs a bit more. The space in the open feins for a way to correct shattered core. Distant even from the image in a reflection reminded by a hurt face. The mind lingers on the line of rights n wrongs n the way normal would taste. Not givin a fuck of how it has to happen to bounce back. For others failed n r failin to partake in actions that last. Findin the the bottom as the me has n is doin shady it takes fallin short. Never enough is what reality has become n one don't know y. Worth n frustration feels as if it's died somewhere inside. Unravelin bits n pieces of the intertwined thoughts r maddenin. As everyone around ignores how much effort is given. There's a special place no longer vacant deep under the surface that battles the arrangement. On standby waitin the outcome hasta stop to find placement. Without necessities in general life that's been torn from the grip. A bomb is embedded in the character pin ballin on nerves bitin the lip. There is nothin that can mend such a helpless time. No one can save the respect of ones own losin the way in the mind. A tampered heart that carries weight splits the difference n scams the the will. Cousin a weak spot so tender the irritation single handedly kills the thrill. The tamed individual simply taps outta what they've been taught. As from the depression emerges someone that refuses to pause.
only so hard
as the fillin of the heart empties.
a desperation of another givin up is everlastin.
there's a feelin of lonesome in an invisible face.
the ache that leaves that hollow hurtful ache.
losin someone one thought they knew.
a fake true friend whom echoes of ilu.
walkin away in a stagger over the madly part.
it feels like a stumble into time that's only so hard.
when two can't master the art of luv.
together they will fall from the tender touch.
emotions fall in n then fall out.
a stranger as a mate disappears from the mouth.
it will rip the truth from the grip.
as no matter what meant nothin released from the lips.
to collide causes so much damage.
time slowed down is easily managed.
til the day another steps away with ur all.
n lookin at anyone else feels down right wrong.
in the middle of the aspiration that could never make sense.
the silence finds every thought runnin wild thru tryin to make mends.
yet, standin alone wonderin is the only thing left.
but that doesn't mean u stop givin ur best.
a desperation of another givin up is everlastin.
there's a feelin of lonesome in an invisible face.
the ache that leaves that hollow hurtful ache.
losin someone one thought they knew.
a fake true friend whom echoes of ilu.
walkin away in a stagger over the madly part.
it feels like a stumble into time that's only so hard.
when two can't master the art of luv.
together they will fall from the tender touch.
emotions fall in n then fall out.
a stranger as a mate disappears from the mouth.
it will rip the truth from the grip.
as no matter what meant nothin released from the lips.
to collide causes so much damage.
time slowed down is easily managed.
til the day another steps away with ur all.
n lookin at anyone else feels down right wrong.
in the middle of the aspiration that could never make sense.
the silence finds every thought runnin wild thru tryin to make mends.
yet, standin alone wonderin is the only thing left.
but that doesn't mean u stop givin ur best.
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
unwillin
Unwilling to awaken to the morning where we say goodbye. Cuz I feel u deep as ur always on my mind. I'm witness to this luv happening. Without ur face in the morning, it be maddening. Each day u sink in further than the one before. Touching the pleasure in the depths of my core. Releasing the passion that's waited to be put to use. As when I look in ur eyes I come unglued. Wanting in to that secret place within no one has been. Tryin to catch my breath as the air becomes thin. Listen to the stare that speaks in silence. Cuz I can't seem to need a way to hide it. In luv with u I've fallen into do waters. N I'm all I have to offer.
soft n pressed
Soft n pressed. Feelin ur lips undress a sigh. I'm stuck in ur eyes lookin back. Close enough to crash as into u. Landin with proof of ur all I've ever needed. Tamed yet never defeated contact has been made. Within emotions safe n reachin. As ur touch is teachin me how luv is real. I feel u pumpin my hearts use. Gently with truth that I can trust u.
ridin the vibes i feel for u
Standing in the middle of luv.
Feelin ur hand within the touch.
Emotions stir about the truths.
Expressed n wantin to be put to use.
I cling to ur presence in my life.
The depths is somethin I can not hide.
Ur the difference that never left.
I felt u dig in to my chest.
Open me up n feel me fall.
Further into u without a pause.
Yet words on hush never heard thru texts.
Couldn't possible sound like they do on my head.
Ridin the vibes I feel for u.
As the battle of who I wanna walk with gas found a truce.
Jus to near u as close as air.
Nothin I've seen can compare.
To ur smile that is real n asked at me.
N in u I wanna lean.
Be that one that styles ur nerve.
N gives meanin to ur worth..... Ilu
Feelin ur hand within the touch.
Emotions stir about the truths.
Expressed n wantin to be put to use.
I cling to ur presence in my life.
The depths is somethin I can not hide.
Ur the difference that never left.
I felt u dig in to my chest.
Open me up n feel me fall.
Further into u without a pause.
Yet words on hush never heard thru texts.
Couldn't possible sound like they do on my head.
Ridin the vibes I feel for u.
As the battle of who I wanna walk with gas found a truce.
Jus to near u as close as air.
Nothin I've seen can compare.
To ur smile that is real n asked at me.
N in u I wanna lean.
Be that one that styles ur nerve.
N gives meanin to ur worth..... Ilu
i jus wanna dig in
I wanna find my way in beneath the to touch that's only skin deep. Cuz the nail might cause a scratch that isn't so deep. I jus wanna dig in even if the cut may come for a chance to hold u. N u can't blame myself cuz I've found somethin within u I wanna luv. To feel un be felt as intensions r as real as the air we breathe. I wanna get use to havin u as near as me gettin down on my knees. So u know I never wanna go anywhere in life without u by my side. As my tongue could never speak a twisted lie...
how hard could it be
gettin over u should be really easy to do if u think bout what it is u bring to the table.
it's jus one of those things of simply havin no use where the possibly is able.
then again I haven't even attempted it in the imaginary sense within the mind.
yet how hard could it be cuz I decipher thru the reasons u give me to fuck with u to decide.
thing is, I'd get lost without u runnin thru the thickness of my stubborn mind.
them again, that I could be lyin cuz I haven't as of yet destroyed the thought of u.
somehow in a strange sense I find it funny to poke at u with disregard with oohs.
it's jus one of those things of simply havin no use where the possibly is able.
then again I haven't even attempted it in the imaginary sense within the mind.
yet how hard could it be cuz I decipher thru the reasons u give me to fuck with u to decide.
thing is, I'd get lost without u runnin thru the thickness of my stubborn mind.
them again, that I could be lyin cuz I haven't as of yet destroyed the thought of u.
somehow in a strange sense I find it funny to poke at u with disregard with oohs.
contact
attemptin the contact to a conscious mind flutterin in the winds of time.
goin with the breeze as if what is found isn't what it was lookin for steppin to the line.
checkin emotions before the reflection stares with confusion with that look in its eyes.
jus tryin to relate in the matter of worth fallin short in the moment behind silenced lies.
mature n awake the mind opens to the facts that self might not be what's needed here.
n conversation is to edgy to force the state of mind to take part in somethin real.
goin with the breeze as if what is found isn't what it was lookin for steppin to the line.
checkin emotions before the reflection stares with confusion with that look in its eyes.
jus tryin to relate in the matter of worth fallin short in the moment behind silenced lies.
mature n awake the mind opens to the facts that self might not be what's needed here.
n conversation is to edgy to force the state of mind to take part in somethin real.
a unique place
when the wrong words find themselves in a rhythm that feels jus right... As if a sad song makes u smile cuz u don't havta go back to the head games flammable to the hearts sigh... You've entered a unique place where the level of comprehension has awakened as u see this world by standin still within... When u feel the mind snap back like a rubber band stretchin the imagination tryin to run off... U collect yourself at the breakin point as the wear n tear has begun to destroy the inner possession s soft... As the motion u feel no one can visualize has become the reality in which u live... It's obtained by truths spilled as lessons mold the grip needed to mature under the armor no longer post... Welcome, of you've reached the other side where the guy is more than a feelin tryin to tell u somethin jus ain't right. Cuz over here the depth didn't take up much space on a piece of mind..
fyi
some of the more recent posts on here r not new. They were in my drafts n in the last few months I finished n posted them. It needed done. A few of them r over a yr old. This is not a typical post.
Sunday, November 30, 2014
back at the livin
back at the livin. fuckin up on purpose to get shit right. What a fuckin twist. Looks like I'm back at my old ways outta plain sight. So pucker up cuz you'll kiss my azz first. Long before I get on my knees to taste urs. Guess out feels good to be me again. As I cast lines with hearts bobbin at the hook lured. Rare n in form with tears to pave the way if needed. I believe in back at creepin up on the blind side leavin soon. Laughin my azz off wantin jus a few years to bounce back. N as usual no one knows but the three that mean the most to me as I'm finely tuned.....
ends
ends let loose so self can be found once again.
fallin further away from the norm in the way one stands.
in who out is that makes them whom they r.
cuz some change the fact applyin bars.
begin someone else til time says it's had enough.
it's as simple as the individual bein true on the mirrors luv.
blinded by the selfish we all seem to drift.
behind what we realize in our own eyes to awaken in a false kiss.
as rare as happiness is its rushed to feel so utterly alive.
settin aside the friend within that never wanted to hide.
jus awaitin the moment to meet in a motionless moment.
always there to listen n give reason in realities unwillin to fold in.
n when face to face the realization of the let down is the greatest pain.
turnin on self til needed in the emptiness that somehow claimed the sane.
ends of beginnings is the witness that slipped away in the core.
jus to turn around n want to feel whole again cuz we were torn.
at the hands we thought would care more for us than our own.
bendin in a way that we'd never break when we wouldn't show.
it's the matter in which we forget bout who is inside.
right to to the point where we reclaim the open mind.
n all the bs ends...............
fallin further away from the norm in the way one stands.
in who out is that makes them whom they r.
cuz some change the fact applyin bars.
begin someone else til time says it's had enough.
it's as simple as the individual bein true on the mirrors luv.
blinded by the selfish we all seem to drift.
behind what we realize in our own eyes to awaken in a false kiss.
as rare as happiness is its rushed to feel so utterly alive.
settin aside the friend within that never wanted to hide.
jus awaitin the moment to meet in a motionless moment.
always there to listen n give reason in realities unwillin to fold in.
n when face to face the realization of the let down is the greatest pain.
turnin on self til needed in the emptiness that somehow claimed the sane.
ends of beginnings is the witness that slipped away in the core.
jus to turn around n want to feel whole again cuz we were torn.
at the hands we thought would care more for us than our own.
bendin in a way that we'd never break when we wouldn't show.
it's the matter in which we forget bout who is inside.
right to to the point where we reclaim the open mind.
n all the bs ends...............
don't play
under the tongue as sly n on point in reverse.
with every word each letter trends to hurt.
slippin n slidin drownin in ur spit.
jus another climax sprung from ur lips.
damn the taste is so fuckin sweet.
I can hear ya nibble on my dreams.
as beautiful as u came so simply insane.
with ease pickin at my only name.
belief is behind the eyes that doesn't exist.
so ramble thru my scrambled mind with a kiss.
feel the way ilu touches ur breath.
exhalin the lies as u waste my best.
u forget I'm experienced to who u think u r.
yet I allow slits once again to tear a new scar.
ride me to the point on top of my time.
again n again I watch u unable to hide.
tell me again I'm ur everything as u fade.
as u accept my foolishness playin ur game.
as the bars I visualize locked with ur relief.
I'm as free as u would never possibly believe.
so lay ur pretty lil head at rest on my chest.
knowin u got what u don't have Neva the less.
I don't know how to give in to emotion.
cuz ur all willin to play selfishly with devotion.
I'm only within ur grasp as u haven't any clue.
don't play with me cuz I'll be gone soon.
luv jus doesn't exist not belong near me.
so get to know me n allow me to head fuck ur dreams....
with every word each letter trends to hurt.
slippin n slidin drownin in ur spit.
jus another climax sprung from ur lips.
damn the taste is so fuckin sweet.
I can hear ya nibble on my dreams.
as beautiful as u came so simply insane.
with ease pickin at my only name.
belief is behind the eyes that doesn't exist.
so ramble thru my scrambled mind with a kiss.
feel the way ilu touches ur breath.
exhalin the lies as u waste my best.
u forget I'm experienced to who u think u r.
yet I allow slits once again to tear a new scar.
ride me to the point on top of my time.
again n again I watch u unable to hide.
tell me again I'm ur everything as u fade.
as u accept my foolishness playin ur game.
as the bars I visualize locked with ur relief.
I'm as free as u would never possibly believe.
so lay ur pretty lil head at rest on my chest.
knowin u got what u don't have Neva the less.
I don't know how to give in to emotion.
cuz ur all willin to play selfishly with devotion.
I'm only within ur grasp as u haven't any clue.
don't play with me cuz I'll be gone soon.
luv jus doesn't exist not belong near me.
so get to know me n allow me to head fuck ur dreams....
jus like u like me
Jus like u I'm still alive.
but like me ur not willin to fight.
jus like u I've fallen.
yet like me ur absent.
jus like u a line has emerged.
like me it had to stop the surge.
jus like u she is damn near the same.
n like me I'm witness again to ur games.
jus like u to give up on me.
so like me to still feel u as the one in me.
jus like u I'm lyin to get my way.
as like me I'm hi longer the same.
jus like u like me, unlike u as if similar to me.
u failed the me left standin in the middle of a dream.
jus like u to half azz for ur own gain.
unlike me u changed me s I'm causin what hasn't happened as of yet, pain.
jus like u I'm comin up at an others expense.
like me I'm gonna use em up then it never admit.
jus like u I'm back gettin under the surface.
livin like me til the end so worthless.
but like me ur not willin to fight.
jus like u I've fallen.
yet like me ur absent.
jus like u a line has emerged.
like me it had to stop the surge.
jus like u she is damn near the same.
n like me I'm witness again to ur games.
jus like u to give up on me.
so like me to still feel u as the one in me.
jus like u I'm lyin to get my way.
as like me I'm hi longer the same.
jus like u like me, unlike u as if similar to me.
u failed the me left standin in the middle of a dream.
jus like u to half azz for ur own gain.
unlike me u changed me s I'm causin what hasn't happened as of yet, pain.
jus like u I'm comin up at an others expense.
like me I'm gonna use em up then it never admit.
jus like u I'm back gettin under the surface.
livin like me til the end so worthless.
damn, i think i fucked me up
locked out a kickin n screamin kinda luv.
slowly realizin it's me on the other side of the door reachin for the touch.
unable to change what's goin on within.
the bars on the heart r reinforced with a hate draped as if trim.
only if I would known I was the enemy before now.
while I sit on the doorstep of what use to be the comfort of homes fraun.
shut out n unable to partake in the remodelin constructed behind the walls.
I can't get in to help the emotional torcher in which I've caused.
I'm a stranger to self in a time where I'm fadin so fast.
somewhat like the abracadabra disappearance of my lingerin past.
I can hear the laughter under the smile that seems broken n betrayed.
n it doesn't want my help today nor tomorrow cuz of what I've done yesterday.
damn, I think I fucked me up somewhere inside of becomin the outcast.
banished from the only place I had left to hide deep enough below the fallin ash.
I'm no longer my own friend wantin to laugh anymore.
he doesn't want me to come in n play cuz like the mask of cry later, I'm torn.
conjoined twins decapitated n severed from the only truth.
only one wins the battle within as it's fair to say I'm on the outside n of no use.
slowly realizin it's me on the other side of the door reachin for the touch.
unable to change what's goin on within.
the bars on the heart r reinforced with a hate draped as if trim.
only if I would known I was the enemy before now.
while I sit on the doorstep of what use to be the comfort of homes fraun.
shut out n unable to partake in the remodelin constructed behind the walls.
I can't get in to help the emotional torcher in which I've caused.
I'm a stranger to self in a time where I'm fadin so fast.
somewhat like the abracadabra disappearance of my lingerin past.
I can hear the laughter under the smile that seems broken n betrayed.
n it doesn't want my help today nor tomorrow cuz of what I've done yesterday.
damn, I think I fucked me up somewhere inside of becomin the outcast.
banished from the only place I had left to hide deep enough below the fallin ash.
I'm no longer my own friend wantin to laugh anymore.
he doesn't want me to come in n play cuz like the mask of cry later, I'm torn.
conjoined twins decapitated n severed from the only truth.
only one wins the battle within as it's fair to say I'm on the outside n of no use.
lil bit
it felt as if I was on my own.
lost n disabled.
within who it was I once was.
standin n so very able.
my life as I knew it would never be the same.
cold I fell deep.
it wasn't how it was suppose to be.
ended was my one dream.
n outta nowhere u were there.
as I knew I had to have u.
jus didn't know how much til u gave a lil bit.
n ever since I've fallen to the truth.
I went from that need of emotion I'd never hold.
to u never leavin no matter what.
it's redirected my heart.
guided by my mind willingness to pause.
so I can feel u grow within a place I thought no one would ever go.
n once before I fucked up.
but u were there as I cheated my head.
n in UI fell deeper in luv.
u showed me the me I couldn't find starin back that touched.
n til then as u came back thru the door I didn't know.
I never knew what it was I seen in u.
couldn't pin point what it was I actually chase after u for.
but now I know it's u my all calls a truce.
sacrificin n prepared to understand u cuz ur jus like me.
open hearted n sinking in to what doesn't need to be gone without.
lost n disabled.
within who it was I once was.
standin n so very able.
my life as I knew it would never be the same.
cold I fell deep.
it wasn't how it was suppose to be.
ended was my one dream.
n outta nowhere u were there.
as I knew I had to have u.
jus didn't know how much til u gave a lil bit.
n ever since I've fallen to the truth.
I went from that need of emotion I'd never hold.
to u never leavin no matter what.
it's redirected my heart.
guided by my mind willingness to pause.
so I can feel u grow within a place I thought no one would ever go.
n once before I fucked up.
but u were there as I cheated my head.
n in UI fell deeper in luv.
u showed me the me I couldn't find starin back that touched.
n til then as u came back thru the door I didn't know.
I never knew what it was I seen in u.
couldn't pin point what it was I actually chase after u for.
but now I know it's u my all calls a truce.
sacrificin n prepared to understand u cuz ur jus like me.
open hearted n sinking in to what doesn't need to be gone without.
before, durin, somewhere else
once luvd, twice hated, third time an unforgettable enemy dyin alive.
satisfaction, fadin in the moment, gone in yesterday's past left in the mind.
driftin along, found in makin due, losin everything but the emotions that linger.
seekin for the one, holdin the passion, unable to forget a stranger that points fingers.
livin in wonder, fallin madly in luv, empty n distant to connectin on that level.
playin games end, opened to real luv, walkin into the horizon alone with a shovel.
secrets hidden from this world, on hush holdin in the pain, showin truths of untold wrongs.
once walkin, twice proudly, third time attemptin to find where self belongs.
satisfaction, fadin in the moment, gone in yesterday's past left in the mind.
driftin along, found in makin due, losin everything but the emotions that linger.
seekin for the one, holdin the passion, unable to forget a stranger that points fingers.
livin in wonder, fallin madly in luv, empty n distant to connectin on that level.
playin games end, opened to real luv, walkin into the horizon alone with a shovel.
secrets hidden from this world, on hush holdin in the pain, showin truths of untold wrongs.
once walkin, twice proudly, third time attemptin to find where self belongs.
Saturday, November 29, 2014
anything
if u feel anything in ur heart still beatin in the freezin winds breeze.
what does it havta do with me fightin the battle defeated on my knees.
if there's anything there, what do u expect me to do with the way u luv.
settled in the war won of wantin nothin more than to make it work with an endless touch.
if a bit more than anything less is motionless n tearin u apart lookin in my eyes.
know I'm standin in time waitin on u to catch up n feel the me that u seem to despise.
n anything u think u might wanna say, I wish I would find the words to express the truth.
cuz I can't take this luv hate mistakes that plagues our irreplaceable proof.
cuz anything less than ur luv will never do as I stand within me as a man always wantin u.
holdin the reality of what we can be if we jus opened up to the facts that beg for a truce.
what does it havta do with me fightin the battle defeated on my knees.
if there's anything there, what do u expect me to do with the way u luv.
settled in the war won of wantin nothin more than to make it work with an endless touch.
if a bit more than anything less is motionless n tearin u apart lookin in my eyes.
know I'm standin in time waitin on u to catch up n feel the me that u seem to despise.
n anything u think u might wanna say, I wish I would find the words to express the truth.
cuz I can't take this luv hate mistakes that plagues our irreplaceable proof.
cuz anything less than ur luv will never do as I stand within me as a man always wantin u.
holdin the reality of what we can be if we jus opened up to the facts that beg for a truce.
think like me
I believe u luv me as long as u can still see me the same. Don't take me wrong cuz its not me bein unfair to an shellfish game. The reality I live with is under the circumstances of luv. That bein the brutal truth within is temporarily shared til things change the touch. Admittance is the understandin that doesn't receive til self shows proof. Not wantin anything but honesty so lastin soothes. N I feel as if I'm only real in ur eyes til u don't approve. That's when emotions shift as I don't have a clue of what ur up to. Lookin at me as if I haven't remained me cuz u didn't pay attention to the details. Human I am in a realization in which one of us to the other jus might fail. Comprehend for a second that time allows us so long to enjoy an other. Til the day comes strangers become friends than luvrs as for some reason one of the two don't wanna be bothered. This jus might eventually hurt one day that may seem to come to soon. Yet there length of happiness on our moment I'd up to u know who. If that is u can wrap ur mind around sanity. Cuz it is ur luv that I hope u grant to me. As u live here outside of dreams where fairytale's aren't imagined in the mind. What goes in comes outta the tone of a sigh. Today is day which is the beginin of the end neither of us wanna claim. Visualize here n now as memories r made feel safe. Wanted n shared but never a guarantee. Does it make sense for u to think like me?
more now than just
my heart needs a beat like my words need a rhythm. Hungry n starvin for the affection that places purpose in my system. The vibe is shocked by the bitterness electrocutin the unwanted thoughts of how someone can be so cold. The emotion is unheard n til now I never knew who self was tryin to unfold. Thoughts drift in a daydream like I'm lost but within I'm found. With so much to say I'm silenced for I needed to change before I released unforgivable sounds. The ache has scared to a numb touch for a the wound has eventually healed. N I'm in need of the comfort of knowin somethin in this world is truly real. Consider me back from the dead n I wanna live without standin still with the lessons that won't allow the trust. My head has been lifted as if I'm more now than just. Jus wantin to be felt is the only void sittin on the nerve. Yet I'm scared to open up cuz its a fucked up feelin to be hurt. I listen for the drum to pound at the passions melody that would ease my mind. To have somethin that'll never leave, I'd stop simultaneously to put in the time.
Friday, November 28, 2014
thirty eight lines laid
flayed like delicacy on display.
jus cut the string n live for another day
walk away in time n save face.
go n don't turn back to be tamed.
a better place awaits to say ur name.
leave as the feet escape the games.
worth isn't an outburst with profound names.
chopped n diced you'll meet be the same.
stayin is the price paid by child rain.
drown if u must drained of tears claimed.
owned by the ungrateful speakin hate.
tellin u the luv is real that abuses the sane.
witness the gain with a ball n chain.
how many times have u felt the pain?
move on cuz its never to late.
nothin more is to be said for its fake.
a pin cushion poked n bleedin from the vein.
drippin u can stand n find no blame.
silence the loose lips spittin on is prey.
somewhere else where hearts don't play.
stay inside ur mind n realize its insane.
to live in anothers way smotherin the gain.
cuz emotions don't walk so well with a cane.
limpin on to the next changed n afraid.
cuz even outside the bats there r gates.
lockin in the captive on surveillance tapes.
watched to be fucked apart cuz ur so great.
piece by piece Losin the peace is fate?
sounds more like a twisted version to debate.
as the cell in the chest is under raid.
sized up n scaled to be weighed.
all for the sake of 4ever that doesn't have a date?
talk bout icin n eatin the fuckin cake.
in the spotlight of Luvs fame.
is it ur standin in ur own true frame?
or controlled by guilts unfair mistreatment that invades.
scars heal as stains will not always remain.
find elsewhere to drop a seed for roots to lay.
jus cut the string n live for another day
walk away in time n save face.
go n don't turn back to be tamed.
a better place awaits to say ur name.
leave as the feet escape the games.
worth isn't an outburst with profound names.
chopped n diced you'll meet be the same.
stayin is the price paid by child rain.
drown if u must drained of tears claimed.
owned by the ungrateful speakin hate.
tellin u the luv is real that abuses the sane.
witness the gain with a ball n chain.
how many times have u felt the pain?
move on cuz its never to late.
nothin more is to be said for its fake.
a pin cushion poked n bleedin from the vein.
drippin u can stand n find no blame.
silence the loose lips spittin on is prey.
somewhere else where hearts don't play.
stay inside ur mind n realize its insane.
to live in anothers way smotherin the gain.
cuz emotions don't walk so well with a cane.
limpin on to the next changed n afraid.
cuz even outside the bats there r gates.
lockin in the captive on surveillance tapes.
watched to be fucked apart cuz ur so great.
piece by piece Losin the peace is fate?
sounds more like a twisted version to debate.
as the cell in the chest is under raid.
sized up n scaled to be weighed.
all for the sake of 4ever that doesn't have a date?
talk bout icin n eatin the fuckin cake.
in the spotlight of Luvs fame.
is it ur standin in ur own true frame?
or controlled by guilts unfair mistreatment that invades.
scars heal as stains will not always remain.
find elsewhere to drop a seed for roots to lay.
Thursday, November 27, 2014
the only one!
cry with me n allow our emotions to grow old together.... Simply beg one another in a apologetic forever.... Eye to eye as the face we wanna see for all time bares expressions.... Pleadin to have mercy of the guilts that have faults in the hearts suspension.... Take in that it's been so long since the touch has meant so much.... N open up to the rarest comfort holdin on to true luv.... Let it flow with me by ur side as I fall into u.... Givin proof that no matter what we stand as one with truce.... Jus look at me witness u as u r for its who I'm.... Yeah, I've fallen n its the only thing I can't seem to hide.... Wrap ur arms around me knowin ur safe with me.... Cuz it mean more than the air I can hardly breathe.... Come settle the wrongs n conversate to a tone that speaks of us.... Cuz I need u n I'm waitin to see if u needin me is true.... I have no need in feelings that go to waste.... N home will never be anywhere without u sharin space.... Shed the tears unseen that leak with the silences drip.... Reachin for the luv spoken deep within a kiss.... It's u I want til time is takin from my hands.... Ur the only one that makes me feel like the man I am.... Can u stay n knowin I'd do anything for u.... Or would it be to much to ask of u to put me to use....
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
u calm the bitterness
under the scope zoomed in on every flaw.
gettin down on all fours like a dog on his paws.
tryin to reconstruct how it is a man is represented.
puttin down a past that disassemble the heart as it was intended.
luv jus didn't exist as the falling away went down.
kickin n screamin attemptin to show the descendin mute to sound.
please forgive the irritated emotion left as u endure the rush.
I'm climbin from within to meet ur hands touch.
know I haven't had the best time of my life lastin very long.
the fracture in my core only seems to lengthen do to bein done wrong.
but I'm willin to feel ya cuz I do.
this is me overcomin the lies that were buried in the truth.
lil lady, hold on so find a way to stand with u without the fear.
cuz in actuality I'm afraid of the pain that hurts the tears.
they fall even from a man like me givin on a level misunderstood.
if u could be a bit patient I wish if it were possible u would.
fallin in to fall out to the rock bottom breaks more than a smile.
it's a moment in time I'm lookin to ever from as if more than worthwhile.
hang on to the good that clings to ur presence makin the difference.
cuz on u I'm doin doin into becomin reliant under the suspense.
u calm the bitterness that exploded within.
soothe the fact I've become defensive n sensitive.
I'm seekin a better way with u to simply live.
without havin to fix what it appears I am before u.
a lil tenderness n understandin is all that's needed as I his from the abuse.
straight up n as real as a man can approach ur kind.
I can n will walk that invisible motionless line.
don't get frustrated in the way I'm witness to lifes fucked up twist.
I've got it in my head no one stays forever as fists clinch.
find in me the believer in u that feins to awaken to the unconditional.
I'm alive in here, it's jus somewhat confusin in a minds terminals.
windin up elsewhere news cuz luv isn't what is said to be within every word.
n I hear u speak with trade emotions that linger with what I've always heard.
I'm doing all I can to reinvent self to the me I know so well.
I got lost n I'm countin on u to free me from standin still........
gettin down on all fours like a dog on his paws.
tryin to reconstruct how it is a man is represented.
puttin down a past that disassemble the heart as it was intended.
luv jus didn't exist as the falling away went down.
kickin n screamin attemptin to show the descendin mute to sound.
please forgive the irritated emotion left as u endure the rush.
I'm climbin from within to meet ur hands touch.
know I haven't had the best time of my life lastin very long.
the fracture in my core only seems to lengthen do to bein done wrong.
but I'm willin to feel ya cuz I do.
this is me overcomin the lies that were buried in the truth.
lil lady, hold on so find a way to stand with u without the fear.
cuz in actuality I'm afraid of the pain that hurts the tears.
they fall even from a man like me givin on a level misunderstood.
if u could be a bit patient I wish if it were possible u would.
fallin in to fall out to the rock bottom breaks more than a smile.
it's a moment in time I'm lookin to ever from as if more than worthwhile.
hang on to the good that clings to ur presence makin the difference.
cuz on u I'm doin doin into becomin reliant under the suspense.
u calm the bitterness that exploded within.
soothe the fact I've become defensive n sensitive.
I'm seekin a better way with u to simply live.
without havin to fix what it appears I am before u.
a lil tenderness n understandin is all that's needed as I his from the abuse.
straight up n as real as a man can approach ur kind.
I can n will walk that invisible motionless line.
don't get frustrated in the way I'm witness to lifes fucked up twist.
I've got it in my head no one stays forever as fists clinch.
find in me the believer in u that feins to awaken to the unconditional.
I'm alive in here, it's jus somewhat confusin in a minds terminals.
windin up elsewhere news cuz luv isn't what is said to be within every word.
n I hear u speak with trade emotions that linger with what I've always heard.
I'm doing all I can to reinvent self to the me I know so well.
I got lost n I'm countin on u to free me from standin still........
Monday, November 24, 2014
til
you'll never understand til you've walked away from luv.
fallin into a different state of mind beneath a more gentle touch.
as emotions face has changed before the eyes that open to use.
in a new moment standin under the pressure of comforts truce.
at the point of impact that digs deeper than bein repaired.
for if it was real prior there'd be no need in meetin someone who cares.
til u feel the break somehow reinvent the loneliness sinkin in of another.
the comprehension of to luv a loss is never to luv but as a luvr.
cheatin self of a pleasure waitin to cling close enough to simply become.
at the line of changin the melt of the heart in a set of hands condition the numb.
crossin over into a place home seems to be more than what u thought it was.
but not til one comes along n gives reason in wantin to be flush.
it's not a replacement in time nor a whole anyone can fill.
under the surface is a compliment of a social kinda friend that awaits the spill.
n til they still into ur life, u can not admit u don't wanna go without them.
cuz they alone make the difference pullin u away from where u were to needin em.
Friday, November 21, 2014
luv is lust
it was once u did what you've done is y it still hurts to see u smile.
since the day of u fuckin failin good times cuz u couldn't be real as if a child.
I've felt the passion n I've felt more than the pain on which u spread.
funny is how I thought I was opened under ur scalpel not to wind up dead.
inside I crumbled within the inner walls you walked through in my mind.
followin u as I chased ya thru the heart that skipped beats knowin u were mine.
I remember what it felt like that somehow jus wasn't enough to last.
n standin in the middle of luv so madly crazy, I knew you'd wind up in my past.
n until u I didn't know what it was like to never be able to walk through home forever again.
cuz it meant nothin under the circumstances to give a lil bit to me as ur man.
the one that stood in place n absorbed more betrayal than emotion could handle.
it's a mystery how bitter sweet somethin that real can jus fade like a melted candle.
u dropped me to my knees n stepped away as if I was nothin more than dead.
I will remember how it was n what u coulda avoided by tellin me the truth instead.
consider done is past tense of finished s I've stepped outta what I become to who I was.
well before u as reality now is a new kinda me with a better understandin, luv is lust.
Thursday, November 20, 2014
a wonder in my mind
if I were to die before ur eyes, would u feel anything that resembles a loss like no other.
what if I were to lay to waste dyin inside seperated from what I know as the perfect luvr.
maybe express I've never disconnected within from a touch like urs before that changed me forever.
would the space between linger in ur mind where u realized its me u missed all together.
I jus wanna know before the time comes so I can react to the depth of ur luv silenced.
it mean more than hopin it's u that finds reason in y I'm worth somehow without the violence.
if I were to fade into the distance somewhere unseen as u didn't know my whereabouts.
would u eventually come searchin for the friend I wanna be as emotions speak out loud.
standin n waitin on the truth of what it is we're suppose to be in a world so fuckin cold.
is it me u dream to always wanna be wrapped in my arms as real as life itself as it's u I hold.
if it came to bein misplaced in time cuz we're so blinded by the rage in front of luv that fights with blame.
could u stop n witness the pain caused is cuz we care on a level the nights would never be the same........
it's a wonder in my mind of who it is we're truly gonna play out to be face to face.
friend or foe n even a stranger after sharin the deepest passion once the heart is tangled within its cage.
nothin lasts forever
it's a fucked up saddened feelin to watch em leave. Momentarily it's almost as if it's get back up off the knees. Broken in reality a the emotion can't hide the loss only on one end of the luv. Shuttin down in the absence of lookin around knowin they're gone for good as is to much. When every movement did everything possible to hold en as long as they were willin to stay. With a bent face that hides behind the smiles as if it truly doesn't matter like ours a game. Raw n unfinished depths find their similar to a drug addiction one hasta go without cuz their also the dealer. Rippin the luv from the core as the pain reaches on desperation none of us r willin to admit cuz ya feel him/her. The unwillingness of gettin use to someone to have em step away as if we're nothin at all defines realities nothin lasts forever. There's nothin to be done t to save the comfort that have up in one direction cuz off on their own there better......
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
loneliness will do the time
sittin in the middle of absence is where a man will never be missed.
cuz real men don't walk away til the end is for sure dead as a kiss.
yet if she doesn't end it he knows one day bein takin for granted will get old.
girl we r not super human n the mistreatment hurts the heart that will fold.
jus cuz we won't stand for the tone doesn't mean we don't luv ya.
stop bein so selfish when a fella takes blow after blow to show u somethin other than pain.
cuz the loneliness will do the time more in his emotions than that of ur own.
we r not all the same if u care to pay attention to the details of worth full grown.
how can we possibly rest if we're not only doin for self the way ur out for self?
try n be a bit more real with ur delivery when u speak cuz everything u say is felt.
the nights can become longer n much colder if u can't realize its not in us to hurt u.
all that's needed is to see u in some kinda way of wantin us in ya life livin in ur smile.
it gets old feelin as if we men don't matter when u seem to explode.
that same ol unwanted thought comes back around every time ur to bold.
jus cuz most men will have u, don't think a real one will beg for ur luv.
cuz if that's what u truly want, the next male could never hold ya with the same touch.
understand even the impact lands on the chest of ur childish words.
We've found within u someone we luv to walk this earth with that's heard.
n at times in more ways than one that's jus not needed so deliberate n careless.
allow us to live in motion so devoted to ur cause able n fearless.
we can only express interest til there's none for the gain chained down n captive.
don't think we havta put up with such a raw attitude cuz its not attractive.
the problem ya may of thought could become a solution somewhere else.
it's jus a matter of time if no matter what isn't given the proper help.
as if another can do better for u when the man ya got is lost in ya luv.
jus go! If that's how u feel passion is worthless bendin for ur touch.
it's only gonna last so long before he stands back up n smiles in a different way.
left in thought of never bein enough to received the respect untamed.
slow ya roll prior to long gone has left n beat u to the punch of pain.
that individual ur doin wrong can only take bout a lil more than to many tears obtained.
jus wait on how he jus doesn't find reason in ur meanin for him to stay.
it's comin n someone other than u will see what u can't be a witness in the way he says ya name........
cuz real men don't walk away til the end is for sure dead as a kiss.
yet if she doesn't end it he knows one day bein takin for granted will get old.
girl we r not super human n the mistreatment hurts the heart that will fold.
jus cuz we won't stand for the tone doesn't mean we don't luv ya.
stop bein so selfish when a fella takes blow after blow to show u somethin other than pain.
cuz the loneliness will do the time more in his emotions than that of ur own.
we r not all the same if u care to pay attention to the details of worth full grown.
how can we possibly rest if we're not only doin for self the way ur out for self?
try n be a bit more real with ur delivery when u speak cuz everything u say is felt.
the nights can become longer n much colder if u can't realize its not in us to hurt u.
all that's needed is to see u in some kinda way of wantin us in ya life livin in ur smile.
it gets old feelin as if we men don't matter when u seem to explode.
that same ol unwanted thought comes back around every time ur to bold.
jus cuz most men will have u, don't think a real one will beg for ur luv.
cuz if that's what u truly want, the next male could never hold ya with the same touch.
understand even the impact lands on the chest of ur childish words.
We've found within u someone we luv to walk this earth with that's heard.
n at times in more ways than one that's jus not needed so deliberate n careless.
allow us to live in motion so devoted to ur cause able n fearless.
we can only express interest til there's none for the gain chained down n captive.
don't think we havta put up with such a raw attitude cuz its not attractive.
the problem ya may of thought could become a solution somewhere else.
it's jus a matter of time if no matter what isn't given the proper help.
as if another can do better for u when the man ya got is lost in ya luv.
jus go! If that's how u feel passion is worthless bendin for ur touch.
it's only gonna last so long before he stands back up n smiles in a different way.
left in thought of never bein enough to received the respect untamed.
slow ya roll prior to long gone has left n beat u to the punch of pain.
that individual ur doin wrong can only take bout a lil more than to many tears obtained.
jus wait on how he jus doesn't find reason in ur meanin for him to stay.
it's comin n someone other than u will see what u can't be a witness in the way he says ya name........
Monday, November 17, 2014
what is n was once
it's the depths of expression of how it's said it'll never end released from the lips.
to the moment of lookin up n life resembles what it is that's left.
movin mountains as the world watches luv awakened to bein held.
it's the way the wind redirects n flows in the right direction.
blowin emotions away when all is said n done in the presence of perfection.
fadin as words have failed to find the definition n understandin face to face.
it's how yesterday remembers passion broken beyond repair learning new game.
windin up downwind blowin with the breeze as one lands somewhere unfamiliar.
wakin up witness to another expressin my everything in ya til the end that's similar.
thinkin it'll be before to soon comin over the horizon of loneliness.
as one more face will drift in times spent under the touch separatin happiness.
it's a motion mentionin the moisture in between a kiss that speaks.
fallin in n outta what is n was once the best thing to the next that leaves a constant leak.
when an individual means more to self than life runnin wild with the emotions shared.
seems they never want ya once they figure they have u opened n bare.
as naked as knowin themselves in true form it's as if somehow one can't be seen.
in arms that squeeze everything in the same as those that has come before that cling.
repeatin the unmentionable weight listenin to the in the moments truth.
they'll fade with change lookin for someone who never be as good to them with use.
we all want what we can't have standin face to face as calm as forever movin along.
yet when it's in the palms most can't feel the right givin more than goin wrong.
I'm seekin within
searchin for the luv left within.
here I am with error sinkin in.
dysfunctional n outta sync.
I've changed since the last time I blinked.
I'm in here somewhere safe n sound.
yet whispers makes it hard for me to be found.
the softer the echo the deeper the silence.
in empty space hate has no resistance.
slippin, the heart doesn't pulsate the same.
vibes attacked by strengths tamed.
it's a confusin time seekin out my replacement.
n I find it to be I'm more than a bit hesitant.
insecurity has claimed the lonely hrs at hand.
cuz all or nothin left me seekin the damned.
settled beneath the version of self.
I see someone else in the mirrors edge that's felt.
I'm in here tryin to gain control.
can u see me reachin from the depths so cold.
help me outta this prison poisonin the pain.
a double dipped dose I feel the strain.
I'm at war scrubbin the stains scribbled.
this is not me outta tone as words dribble.
leapin as I peel away at the core.
chained in a cell I can not escape the lores.
bobbin with a hook that hurts more than before.
deep within the confusion is stored.
cut me open n take from me who u see.
so I can heal the break of what I seem.
betrayed n breathless gaspin for air.
cuz somewhere in her I do actually care.
I don't wanna live in defendin what u didn't cause.
witness to my internal untrustin flaws.
I wanna be me again without this torture of bein hurt.
strugglin I am only a glimpse of the good the lurks.
overshadowed n fightin to become whole in plain sight.
hopin tonight u dig in n fell the real me n sigh.
n I find it to be I'm more than a bit hesitant.
insecurity has claimed the lonely hrs at hand.
cuz all or nothin left me seekin the damned.
settled beneath the version of self.
I see someone else in the mirrors edge that's felt.
I'm in here tryin to gain control.
can u see me reachin from the depths so cold.
help me outta this prison poisonin the pain.
a double dipped dose I feel the strain.
I'm at war scrubbin the stains scribbled.
this is not me outta tone as words dribble.
leapin as I peel away at the core.
chained in a cell I can not escape the lores.
bobbin with a hook that hurts more than before.
deep within the confusion is stored.
cut me open n take from me who u see.
so I can heal the break of what I seem.
betrayed n breathless gaspin for air.
cuz somewhere in her I do actually care.
I don't wanna live in defendin what u didn't cause.
witness to my internal untrustin flaws.
I wanna be me again without this torture of bein hurt.
strugglin I am only a glimpse of the good the lurks.
overshadowed n fightin to become whole in plain sight.
hopin tonight u dig in n fell the real me n sigh.
i don't think i wanna know
I don't think i wanna know where steps taken end up. Seems its a constant worry pullin on the outcome crawlin beneath the touch. Losin sight of direction as both ways is patience interrupted by sittin still. Is the path chosen fallin away before the feet move towards the thrill? Sidelined puttin use in play somewhere along the lines of the attempt to survive. On the shoulders weighin heavy as character is beginnin to hide. Walkin down this road as the edges fall n the yellow seam goes from solid to dotted. Somethin tells me I'm lost in the middle of nowhere spotted. I try to camouflage the pain of feelin alone n dyin alive. When emotions have found a comfort that doesn't on a equal battlefield join the fight. I'm witness on a one way street of life strollin by smilin in my face. Yet it tickles the passion clingin s fingers r clinched to the lace. Gettin home isn't somewhere I've been in this lifetime findin shelter. N here in my private lil world tappin on the truths I jus wanna help her. Helpin me connect with the walls that protect the silence spoken with interest. I don't know if I wanna know if I have it in me to give my best. I'm startin to appear as if I'm not the same as before in a past moment that stood with purpose. Wakin up to a new time where bein blinded is worthless. Where does the other end lead of its headed adrift. Unveiling the unwilling with other wants over needs that surface in the drownin early mornin mist. How it's possible I haven't the slightest clue of the repeated pattern failin to stand by my side. Pretendin to give up on the goods is another givin in to submission to me realizin the desire shared is false lies. Havin that one place no one can take jus isn't as real as it's said to be. Cuz a one sided luv is a lonely state of mind when the march is backwards as reverse lookin onwards with a dream is the next best thing.
Friday, November 14, 2014
as real as i can possibly let loose
n by chance if tomorrow became somethin of the past, please remember I wanted it to last.
cuz it be the luv in ya smile shapin ur lips that would neva go outta style.
no matter what happens I have room for u, deep within the truths.
lets jus say perhaps u weren't there that first mornin in the beginnin of a new life torn.
I'd think bout cha n wonder in time where it is u drifted away in my mind.
carryin the loss of how u touched a secret place I'd hold only for u lost in luv.
in other words as pages tell the story, in the end it be u that gave the glory.
I'm jus speakin from a gentle depth clingin to knowin u in a way how I if wound up alone without u, I truly enjoyed ur stay.
a million miles of separation couldn't part me from the emotion reachin for the devotion.
n if u wind up somewhere without me blowin in the wind, the thought would hurt the tears drippin from my chin.
it feel as if home was that one place I could Neva go, n anywhere else would fade slow.
with a single memory of how it felt to be that one closer than anyone so madly in luv.
the passion u made me feel without tryin most likely might in all honesty, leave me livin miserably.
crackin smiles n attemptin to find my way like open arms would feel as comfortable as urs, naked to to the core.
hear me if ur listenin, cuz I fell deep enough to swim in paradise whistlin.
speakin to the nature of the hearts undyin claim jus wantin u still the same.
from day one til the day I'd parish as in between is the me showin its u I cherish.
livin in n outside of my dreams, its no matter if I'm awake or asleep I know u r my reality.
calmin my understandin of what luv is suppose to be somehow alive inside as I breathe.
there is no searchin for who it may be that owns my heart cuz its been u from the start.
n even though I didn't know you'd be felt so intensely within, the insanity I feel for u makes sense with a sane grin.
but if u havta say I had to go, take with u a piece of me that one day maybe might help u know.
u r luvd in a unique kinda maturity that has learned by holdin ur hand, as soft as pride has melted for u to mold as I became ur man.
ur free to run through my mind forever not only as an expression, but as u in true form missed if we Neva meet expectations.
as real as I can possibly let loose, I feel u as if we were still new.
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
a mature state of mind
in the process of shut down mode one is tired of gettin hurt. Cuttin ties to the ungrateful seems to be the only way to find true worth. Never allowin any one person to get close enough without proof of security. Closin the cage so emotion can find comfort in the way it is felt. Gettin what's been put into relations so stability leveled has the help. Calmin the situation is not as hard to get back to in the presence of reality. Havin a mature state of mind with reason balanced livin outside what appears to be a dream. The final curtain that closes is accepted when all else has failed. Walkin outta one life into the next as everyday life changes cuz another is stale. Unwillin to compromise rights n wrongs with a tone carried that speaks more than they care. Fact of the matter is the enjoyment between two people is in fact a moment together spent with no common ground will never become a pair. Findin they come n they go a way of life to unlock self to someone else. Not that anyone ever wants to part with the touch that's molded the whelps'. Jus to know them was the passion shared that faded for a new mornin of happiness gained. It's the control n understandin of character that doesn't place blame. Everything runs it's coarse til the day the end is witness to the pain deletin the settled smile. Leavin at the doorstep what seemed to be worth the while. In the breakin point that shatters a bond is what is unfortunately undeniable. Only one really wants it more to give will meanin to go as far as bein reliable. N the snap back is like a rubber band that jerks an individual in reverse. So that of a realization can be seen for what it really is to decide they don't wanna be hurt.
Saturday, November 8, 2014
someone gave up
goin back at the end is gone away from home awaitin the arrival.
once findin some place considered comfort in the hearts survival.
leavin the future before it happened as it's lived cut short.
dyin emotions filter the emptiness left on the lonely core.
with a on of switch broken the loss finds the old familiar.
sent into the came from cuz someone gave up on somethin similar.
that feelin of where one belongs n in luv which doesn't matter.
forced to seek a prior movement of wonderin disaster.
in the moment of the part disconnectin the head shakes.
when one realizes they've wasted time on another mate.
to what was that ended to make way for the now that had time.
change is the endless pit of betrayal disturbin the thoughts in the mind.
once findin some place considered comfort in the hearts survival.
leavin the future before it happened as it's lived cut short.
dyin emotions filter the emptiness left on the lonely core.
with a on of switch broken the loss finds the old familiar.
sent into the came from cuz someone gave up on somethin similar.
that feelin of where one belongs n in luv which doesn't matter.
forced to seek a prior movement of wonderin disaster.
in the moment of the part disconnectin the head shakes.
when one realizes they've wasted time on another mate.
to what was that ended to make way for the now that had time.
change is the endless pit of betrayal disturbin the thoughts in the mind.
Friday, November 7, 2014
hidden secrets
lets fall away as if the sun is dippin into the hidden secrets wantin to feel the night. Lets chase one another around the bed n see who comes in first in the moons light. Lets play pin reach other til the wall so shadows can connect n enjoy the emotion in sexual intensions. Lets follow the directions of rules broken to set free the deepest passions under suspension. Lets jus n later jus say we did with a smile on hush only for us to know. Lets speak in tongues behind Thai licked door wide open for the slap happy hands of pleasures pain. Lets simply go all the way under n over the covers n drive reach other completely insane.
copy cats
depths hidden from the act.
tucked behind the facts.
there is no diggin into the shallow.
fake faces tend to coward.
shapin a front as if protected.
none the less it is detected.
walkin amongst the clowns.
side by side over the same ol ground.
the walk, the talk, the demeanor.
n so fuckin pathetically eager.
playin the part of a copy cat.
unable to present self at that.
no shovel needed n the surface is thin.
there's nothin unique within.
afraid of showin the inside of a man.
a real individual cuz he can.
raw n on a level made from scratch.
n its truly fuckin sad.
Pete n repeat was sittin on a bench.
as life loses self in their clinch.
following the leaders lost followers.
til the dirty rises to devour.
Wednesday, November 5, 2014
luv can't be trusted
on a trip cuz luv can't be trusted down six deep.
walkin the distance n layin with dirt beneath their feet.
tastin the unsettled honesty said to be real.
eyes shut behind ties that bind the feel.
face down bein an expression opened to lies.
as frames pic memories broken in the mind.
betrayal handles squeezed breaths with a grip takin life.
in the instant of owned changes good times.
freezin cold in ragin heated moments thawin never more.
raped willingly strippin the inner linin of the core.
in the presence enclosed bottled n tapped.
pourin valves feel pieces still intact.
one way ticket to pains passion loose at the lips.
sinkin quick emotions speak to soon below the hips.
Always will become never havin a chance.
luv is a window closed with broken glass that cuts short plans.
once lived is enjoyments faces takin on new shades n shapes.
shadows n silhouettes of what is replaced that has escaped.
fibs of forevers promises r actual days one at time.
live here to get there no ones real enough at the drop of a dime.
temporary pleasures sit in a stare locked eye to eye.
yet the no matter what part fails to try.
want not needs never to be hurtin the blind.
on the back end of the story self is the find to be defined.
away with the walk tramplin in the sludges stick.
takin steps in reverse forward as kiss my azz is tomorrow's birds flicked.
out in plain sight for weaknesses to attempt to hide within a gent.
guided n reassured the mirror stand with the important than false statements.
her luv is no good in due time of makin shit last.
come n go holdin the line to trip further from the past.
overrated feelins unlock the bars that protect sanity.
they all leave before the end that differed in in their own thoughts.
helpin those in an imaginary sense to live as real at all costs.
on the run that can't get away fast enough to smile.
told ur my everything yet jus wasn't truly with the while.
fell apart at the seams in which connected hearts patchin a different kinda........
pain that was said to be this is it or somethin along the lines of holla...
walkin the distance n layin with dirt beneath their feet.
tastin the unsettled honesty said to be real.
eyes shut behind ties that bind the feel.
face down bein an expression opened to lies.
as frames pic memories broken in the mind.
betrayal handles squeezed breaths with a grip takin life.
in the instant of owned changes good times.
freezin cold in ragin heated moments thawin never more.
raped willingly strippin the inner linin of the core.
in the presence enclosed bottled n tapped.
pourin valves feel pieces still intact.
one way ticket to pains passion loose at the lips.
sinkin quick emotions speak to soon below the hips.
Always will become never havin a chance.
luv is a window closed with broken glass that cuts short plans.
once lived is enjoyments faces takin on new shades n shapes.
shadows n silhouettes of what is replaced that has escaped.
fibs of forevers promises r actual days one at time.
live here to get there no ones real enough at the drop of a dime.
temporary pleasures sit in a stare locked eye to eye.
yet the no matter what part fails to try.
want not needs never to be hurtin the blind.
on the back end of the story self is the find to be defined.
away with the walk tramplin in the sludges stick.
takin steps in reverse forward as kiss my azz is tomorrow's birds flicked.
out in plain sight for weaknesses to attempt to hide within a gent.
guided n reassured the mirror stand with the important than false statements.
her luv is no good in due time of makin shit last.
come n go holdin the line to trip further from the past.
overrated feelins unlock the bars that protect sanity.
they all leave before the end that differed in in their own thoughts.
helpin those in an imaginary sense to live as real at all costs.
on the run that can't get away fast enough to smile.
told ur my everything yet jus wasn't truly with the while.
fell apart at the seams in which connected hearts patchin a different kinda........
pain that was said to be this is it or somethin along the lines of holla...
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