let's be as real as even crystals aren't clear...

i cannot sleep so here i go... let's research what i can find to help me live it through...  i need some positive shit that jus simply doesn't know how to hide... reverse jus isn't an option when i can take the financial burden to be free from bein enslaved in the mind... no can do for the creativity to see life in a different way lives... n there is ,uch i still have to give... to my fuckin self... bcuz i deserve  to be happy in every aspect with only what helps... don't speak outta line bcuz i will be gone so u to can find somethin u enjoy.... baby, i ain't the one to be tried as a toy.!. if i cannot have what i lend as a bit of a comfort, there's no reason in clingin to me... i am not one of ur forced realities where miserability takes control n dreams... actions will neva take a back seat to my own fuckin shine... i could give a fuck less if it isn't real n worth my time... lookin at angles that thrive with a moment to relax rather than hold me down... i wanna live for i've spent more than enough time alone to find who it is i am standin on my own two feet wonderin with the silence of sound... lookin in a new direction... over in the yonder for my own protection... n that goes any of u... let's speak the fuckin truth... u wanna know the same way i'm literally dyin to find out... i'm zoned the fuck out knowin what true luv is n i ain't seen nowhere near the likes of it put to use...walk with me, leave n come back... you'll know then without pushin youself to have a heart attack... for me i'm mentally intact the way u so claim to be... luv it or like it we want the same things n that is to be truly free... for i am not lost nor here or there... my home is not open but for sure isn't  bare... there's room to move around in my emotions like the sliver on a stick can get.... as we would havta be friends... otherwise i can't do it as assumptions are shut the fuck up... it's like over luv.!. or stay the ur silly azz awat from me... i know what i live to breathe... you'd jus be an additive understood to give pleasure in many different ways... n right now i'm here within this day... prolly talkin to u... or even u... bcuz for the life of me idk who u are... so no, u cannot have the depths of the lunge into my over sized heart... step along side n let's move as action speak without words... sssh, as even this shouldn't havta be heard...