She awakens me...

Awakening to a kiss to the cheek... Feeling a smile stretch as she breathes... As the heat from her sigh does so much more than open my eyes... She's the perfect reason to come to a new day as i am to rise... As she touches my face n slides her hand down my chest... She never fails to show me her undeniable best... With ur whispers funding my ear... It's her softness i cannot help buy to hear... Nibbling a lil bit like a tug to get up... As every morning without fail it's me she's ready to luv... Curling up to the comfort she seeks by my side... She makes the moment more than worth having her in my life... N when i don't move she chuckles in her own weird way... Climbing up on top of me with the sun behind her to begin a new day... She's breathtaking n hopelessly in luv with who it is i am... As i witness myself coming from within on a daily being get biggest fan... As her fingertips find the curve of my ribs... My palms ride the texture of her hips... She jus wants to see the design in my eyes look back at her... Looking up at her goofiness unable to put her into words... She has this way about her that gives me so much joy... Able to play like a child yet understand like an individual of what it takes... As free as being who she is i am what she believes is the ultimate gain... Making it as easy as jus being able to live... N there's no one else I'd personally would rather be with...

Fall away...

To be present the day u fall is not something i wanna see... With a stare having in my direction leaning in to a belief that I'm the answer to ur dreams... Ur blinded by what u want n cater to the thought of who u want me to be... When there's something missing in my eyes u can't seem to believe... As u think u can change hire my heart feels by being the way i breathe... Unable to realize the physical entanglements are shallow giving to momentary needs... I don't wanna stand n watch u wind up on ur knees... Doin anything it takes to win my interests lingering with the breeze... I'm trying to be a friend n my kindness is seen as being mean... Refusing to give in to emotions demanding the sooner than later grief... So to entertain ur smile wanting to suck n kiss on my lips is a fetish u peep... Why don't u believ one day eventually i will be forced to leave.?. Back on my own with another memory neither of us can attempt to keep... In the second u tilt my way i don't wanna catch u falling into what u feel is free... I come with a cost where pain jus may develop is i donut witness mentally sanity... N you get that they is no limit to the days to know what it is u bring... I can't become ur version to me as i drift into the back of ur mind as if a careless fling... So if u would go reach in to someone else's chest, please.!. I'm not as easy as ur one two threes getting lost within what ads up in ur pleads... Years earn the gaining of the five to ten to get to the sigh of twenty...

Altered...

At one point life was with every moment in the living... Ever since it's been to hard to bare for there's not much to be given... It wah like being at the top with lung to spare in the heart... N anymore it's what the fuck do people expect when touching old scars... Once there was peace befor the chaos came along... N now the silence jus wishes other would get lost... From the heights of smiles raissed to peaks seen for days to come that are never alone... Down to the belly of the pits where nowhere ever feels like home... It used to be there was a joy that was as free as the air we breathe... Though that all changed when reality was a struggle to be redeemed... After being touched by a worth that made everything make so much more sense... The end result lingers in the swamps refusing to pretend... Knowing the better days have come n gone asf if time is shortly lived... There's a diffetent kinda chuckle in the way names are shaped upon the lips... From a prior emotion that believed in others... The myth formed its own tale where the loneliness can only be comforted by acts of random luv'rs... Damn the though of how passion consumed desires wanting to play... Due to all that's left is fear of what could be if self ever did escape... Remembering the foolishness that spread like a virus through the chest... Back then is where usefulness have it's best... Altered into the makings of a solo act running scared... There's no hope to ever allow the sensitivities to be bared... Things were simple once upon a time ago... So fuck it if u must know...

Jus drive...

I have shotgun n u can drive to wherever u like...

We can hit the coast n sit on the beach or find an old country road n roam...

The direction doesn't matter as long as here is in the rearview mirror...

Just start it up n let's get lost for a lil while with a smile...

Work the bends like u work ur curves n allow me to loosen my nerves...

Off to a getaway made for two as life is to be excused...

With a lil one on one to wherever u decide is our momentary home...

Take me with u is all i ask n ill be good company n that's a fact...

I just need u to steal me n go live some other kinda dream...

With the windows down we can head down south...

Even travel as far as the mountains transforms our faces into a more comforting norm...

Anywhere will do as long as I'm with u...

Cruising around with nowhere in mind n everywhere to be found...

Listening to the wind in between out favorite songs as we flee...

I can be ur sidekick n enjoy the risk...

Let's go to a place where it's jus our own lil escape...

Drift n turn the wheel to become simpler than what this world can feel...

Jus u n i, mobile, free n at times looking up at the sky...

Talking in the silence as the horizon changes before the eyes widened...

It's the brief stops along the way that create a spark prior to the flame...

To give a lil light at night to see how we in fact sigh...

Resting for a bit as we sit n shoot the shit...

In a remote undetermined location as if nowhere feels like a relocation...

Either in the middle of the thick of woods known as the sticks...

Or upon the opened flat lands where forever can be seen as our last chance...

It's up to u as I'm getting in to take a ride bcuz ur worth the zoom...

Tilted sideways...

There's days i feel like me, free n complete... Then there's others that scream from daydreams to stop it, please... Pleads follow the need to gather myself within my means... Then i lean into the the way my mind leaves me to wander with eyes that leak... Finding a shortness of breath when screening through the anxieties pleads... I teeter on things in my mind my heart caused due to cheap tings... As hitting my head only indented bings in the chest that opened holes for grief to breathe... Sometimes I'm ok n everything seems to be a relief... Then i wind up not being able to believe in anything... Idk if I'm coming or going or what mood will trigger the lead down deep in my very own heap... I'm no one to be although others think I'm living the dream... I feel alone n dead all at once n it swings like saloon hinges that creek something mean... I'm tilted sideways unable to rinse myself clean from the heat that creates a sweat that stinks... As i sink n then surface with a gleam safe from what I've seen...

The comfort of depression...

Battered emotions will take the mind for a ride... Confusing the inner details that make self resist reality's reason of why... When a luv truly felt refuses to feel in return it'll ache in the heart... Triggering the rawest passion to bury itself deep in the chest that's been chard... As time has the only key to unlock the chamber to where true worth resides... N even with the door swung wide open it'll still choose to hide... Leaving desires to wander about carelessly in the wind... As if luv cannot rationalize what a friend truly is... Damaged thoughts destroy the mental aspect to believe in others... Building a wail so figurative due to the interest in self sought out by luv'rs... For self has misplaced the ability too reconnect with what goes on in the outside... Claiming the singke life is so much better when sitting alone in the middle of life... As depression is fought in the silence behind the smile that creates joy for others to feel... Transforming is the clown from within the pain that is all too real... Having control of every function other than late at night... When the day fades n the no one can see self shine... The twist reflects on the hurt that feeds brain... Keeping self awake is the desperation of trying to forget that one fuckin name... A face that haunts the memory due to no one else is allowed in... N this is how the betrayal is able to live... Sucking on everything good that comes along... Wishing the one thing that haars everything could actually talk... As walls have no ears n cannot absorb the voices vibes... When all is said n done n the tongue cannot lie... Hope has been lost in a solitude made for one... The one true place that becomes the fears home...

Back n forth...

Swinging in the sunset sitting on the porch... Thoughts of a life lived is a crave of wanting more... As age tells the body it was worth every fuckin second spent... For the reflection alone has its very own story as it went... It was long... Yet shorter than it could ever be thought... Having times where alone dragged out n being in luv swept up memories gathered for self to hold tight... But that's life... Sitting in a stare on why it tends to turn out differently than what the heart wants... N it isn't until it doesn't matter when the mind throws in the gloves... As the creeking sways back n forth jus thinking about where one had been... Without anyone to share a single tear with when poking at the ribs... Jus watching the horizon change colors until the night does its thing... All the while drifting with the loneliness unable to breathe... Being too old for anyone's bs yet having a lil somthing to give... The solo rock goes back n forth content to be at peace with the grit... As the skin wrinkles n hands that have gone empty for so long... Being trapped in the head is a norm where one doesn't feel so lost... Bcuz when the day comes to rest there's no one left to lose... N that alone is with a chuckle to be amused...

Along comes another smile...

With another smile to come along the fight is on... The wall goes up n the shit down hides holes that's been torn... As the refusal to heal is just ventilation as i breathe... Making it easier to feel the flow of the breeze... Though it brings yet another stranger triggering the fear... With self goin back inward attempting to avoid words lips want me to hear... When the silence sounds better than what week eventually fade... Voices last as long as yesterday coming up from tomorrow stuck with a familiar face... Here comes an adaption demanding worth... A soon to be friend where nothing is ever good enough just to claim that it hurts... In the moment of sharing a lil time... But is it to gain an earning to be in my life.?. Coming outta nowhere are inquiries using selfish interests they cannot see... Unable to witness the difficult choice that must be made of simple lil daydreams... For thoughts are created by an imagination that doesn't live in the real world... I'm jus trying not to have my fingers buried into my fists as they curl... Due to luv brings hate if deptgs are bout considered in the indivudual that stands alone... Knock knock knock, the heart vibrates from a tappong wanting into my home... Shaking behind the locks... Watching hands spin around hours looking up at the clock... There's one more digging a tunnel to get to me... As my anxiety bounces off the walls jus thinking about the day they leave... At the end of everything i am to open up to they means nothing at all... I sit on my solitude chuckling jus to listen to reason echo off the walls... The one true thing that's been there line no other had ever felt me from within... This gesture constructed is a twist shaped into a grin... A defense mechanism that doesn't seem to work... As the presence of a possible luv'r lurks... Waiting for a reply to actions put into play... What is the mind to decide when all it craves is to escape.?. With eyes awaiting something different to come along... To touch a deeper texture ever so raw... Rare to the sinking beneath the skin... Truly living in between the tickle of each n every rib... There's a new figure telling me nights would be so much better if they were laid up by my side... As i collapse jus wanting to die... Petrified of what it is yet to come... Drifting back n forth in no need to get along with the rush... The struggle tugs a pull to give in or be folded by another passerby... I believe my brain has finally been fried...

all i ever wanna do is...

my imagination has an illusion it's trying to stick to ur silhouette... yet ur more like a hologram only i can see when my eyes focus in on the shadowy figure i haven't been able to witness as of yet... like a day dream that i chase in my head i cannot quite catch... i sleep to watch u play in the thoughts i cannot control every night as i relapse... jus to drift on the wonder of who u are come mid day as my mind gets lost... my sights knows ur shape n my senses can feel u the close u get... though it's when reality has faded n i'm lingering in the space in between my ears is when i reach for ur lips... as they are claimed by the darkness as i awaken to my heart racing ever so fast... like the story of my life of never being able to lean into the thrill of ur body in a moment that lasts... i try to go back under bcuz ur nowhere out here to be found... n all i ever wanna do is fall beneath the lights n slip away with u in some sorta fantasy that creates a friend whispering wow... bringing to life the mirage u seem to be... just outta reach... right in front of me... yet, too far to mingle in the flesh in need... though there are times i cannot remember a fuckin thing once i come n back from ur grasps... knowing every time i jus wanna see ur face so i know who it is that wears a faceless mask... roaming in the depths of my chambers so freely it aches to play cat n mouse... sitting upon my tongue is the usefulness i cannot get to come outta my mouth... for all i ever wanna do is taste the flava of ur name as i call out to u... for u to spin around for once so i can have a glimpse of u on the loose... staring at me like come n get it if u want it... knowing damn well i cannot keep up with u floating around in the domains within as ur a mere glitch... a fascination made up to comfort the loneliness i cannot seem to run away from... as ur jus an escape from everything gone wrong by rule of thumb...

If u would...

Answer the calling of my heart n put it to use... I'm all i am as one man standing in the middle of life waitin on ur move... Allowin u to feel how my emotion can not deny the way u trigger my thoughts... As it ain't ur body that i need to pay the cost... Feel me without a sense of luv if that mashes any sense... Like a friend who comprehends a bond is stronger when minds do not pretend... Think of me n tell a truth of who it is i coukd be to u... Yet set aside the passion just long enough to get to the goods... Those details of use that linger on the tips of tongues wanting to move... Into my eat whisper the silliness of who u are... Tug on my smile to lift as u ignite a spark... I just wanna see u ain't live everyone else hanging around before u havta go... So if u would, give me something I've neva known.!.

A more darker place...

Idk how many times I've turned away from the mirror with a tears falling from the eyes... As the whisper of fuck life shakes my pupils n i can't face myself bcuz i know who i truly am in my mind... Wasted n tucked away in the silence where no one could ever reach me... I jus didn't resemble myself n everything around me wasn't worth the living it took to believe i was free... Trapped in isolation without a friend within as the walls keep closing in... Tweaking my smile until it was tilted into a grin... As my reflection showed me i wad no longer the same... N at times i wished it would all end so i could be done with the hate... Lost i fell deep as age changed my face... Awakening to every morning to the sane ol  that i couldn't escape... I wanted out n cane close to digging my way into my grave... Unable to stare back au myself i eventually caved... Found the floor without a bed but wad better than a seat behind a wheel with no shower to bathe... Just to feel it slip away again as of there was nothing in this fuckin works to be gained... I was my worst enemy though i wad the only friend i had... N it didn't add up in the confusion when i did the math... N living, fuck, i mentally killed myself night after night... Making empty rooms more crowded than the space between my ears listing the fight... Alone i sat n contemplated how death would take all the pain away... As i cried for i was afraid... Living in fear of what i might do if it had gotten any worse... Listening to my tongue taste all the things that hurt... I felt distant n sucked into a more darker place in which i was constantly torn... As my mind snapped n somehow a light came on... Though i remember the endless disbelief that drained me dry... Having to gather reasons to move on n collect my life...

Cum on out...

If we got to the stimulations that aroused hormones to truly come out n play... Who would i witness come to life as I stroked every naughty thought displayed upon ur face.?. Giving them what the seek beneath a indescribable chuckle stretching ur smile... Has ur eyes speak to me looking up from ur knees making the mood worth the while... Is there something deeper to ur desires u haven't as of yet done.?. I could show u a few things about yourself if u accept me as that one... In an act of submission where ur pleasure is that of my own... I just can't do the typical bs that cannot comprehend it's all in the way u moan... Teased to beg n yet want me to stop bcuz the nerve is just to fuckin much... As i shh ur lips n go a lil softer until ur able to compete with every pounding of a thrust... Is it in u to feel my hand squeezing the blood flow to ur head.?. Exiting what triggers u to open up n be used to make u vent... To speak out obscenities as filthy as ur human nature cannot be tammed... Though through sexual interaction you'll be maintained... Played with n enjoyed until ur body gives the fuck up... N what we do will remain in the room in which we take the time to explore the rush... Pushing limits until i have gained ur complete trust... Ooh, what the tongue is willing to hush...

It's always there...

The fear of change never seems to stay away for too long... Causing a ripple effect that makes anything other than the silence, wrong... It shakes the heart n tries to pry the bars off the mind... Wanting in to give hope like it'll never turn out to choose a different life... As emotions tremble when fingerprints touch the surface of the skin... N thoughts get the better of a good thing knowing it would be messy to live... On the outside of the loneliness where smiles are shared... Yet that's a place where redirect interests n it's right back to feeling scared... With a chance comes one of two things... To enjoy it while it lasts or reject the offering of an other attempting to sing... To awaken to a familiar face they know n trust... Though a day lingers in due time where forever comes too soon n there's a falling outta luv... Friends don't talk n the void fills rooms unable to hear echos flung at the walls... Finding self alone n wondering if others ever truly care about a simple pause... A moment in time that speaks in its own honestly way to be claimed... Believing in opening up instead of all of the hate... It's the ache that shuns comfort to the side... Petrified that if someone gets close they'll use the dull side of the knife... Yet, it doesn't tend to ever miss is cue... Right when a smooth groove is found one remembers the end that rips holes in the chest from the abuse... N it's like closing the casket sorta speak... To be done with the twisted bs that's always placed at bare naked feet... To do ones own stomping or to turn n stray... It's inevitable so why ever look at relations as a gain.?.

Creepin on...

There's things i do n do not believe... In between this n that n all the questionable definitions of free... I just wanted to show u i never lied when i told u i was a friend before anything else... Even though i was never considered as a keep as i was never truly felt... N the hardest thing was to havta stop doing what i swore to u, but i wasn't given a choice... For even i for some reason couldn't fill that empty void... I never had a chance but I ain't mad though... I had my moment n I came to witness a real sense of worth that snuck up on me after the fact of u n I n all the oohs n ahs that turned into whoas... I found me in a different situation in which u refused to partake in other than being stuck in my mind... As all i can say is, life goes on n it's about fuckin time...

Something i just...

Do u remember that time i slide up behind u n softly whispered in ur ear, "I'm madly in luv with u" as i kissed ur ear.?. N do u recall ever since, not even my friendship ever meant anything to u bcuz truth be told i was someone u could spared.?. Yeah... I've lived through the change my heart had to adjust to as u had fun at my expense as no matter what stood its ground without one ounch of proof... Though i looked the entertainment based on gimme gimme that allowed me to remove u from depths i didn't believe would ever let go of u... U don't know but when i wad with others it felt like i was cheating even though there was spave n time forcing me to wake the fuck up... Though i liked it due to the things I've learned that helpedme comprehend the true messing of luv... N i just wish i could have my tag back at times bcuz u ain't it but i wouldn't know u the way i do... From ya smile to ya strut to that laugh thst went through me it's the real me u are too lose for i honestly never had u... Don't call, don't text n by golly don't ever believe or wonder if u ever cross my fuckin mind... I buried u in the hole u dug n watered me a brand new htatifying type of life... Using ur memory as the fertilizer to grow upward n back into what u failed to realize what u held in ur arms... N yeah, I've known for some time i was never held sacred to ur heart... N we all have how w feel n u have that right though i jus wish u woulda told me instead of thinking u were smarter than me... I have a knife n gave u a flame as the wick burned until u couldn't be felt pulling out the blade setting me free... I just wanted u to know bcuz u presume to imagine I'll always be one phone call away from u needing a lil comfort from a friend... When in actuality i was done the day i didn't at me in ur eyes n that was prior to ever walking away from a touch that soothed the beast that came to peace with relations end...

dead's end...

if there's nothing at the end, what was it all for.?. when the day comes to look back, what's its worth if life is a lonely bore... unable to share memories as self hasta store images no one else has ever seen... living daily as a loner making ones own way n bypassing nearly missed day dreams... jus to  wind up in a solitude state of mind with not one person to enjoy a smile with... as chuckles can't even rumble a tickle on the shallows of the ribs... who is one when it's all said n done n everything has gone by so fuckin fast.?. as time ages the face unseen in an other's past... what's the purpose of doin shit on ones own if the loneliness is all there is waiting.?. to sit with a void due to the fear of being hurt just sounded too evading... having a sense of lost not wanting to ever be found... to dwell of what one should've done when luv tried to make a sound... where's the comfort in a friend that has no idea where years hide in self's head.?. only having stories without a true visual pondering in old age due to trust issues that define one until they're dead... when evenings are as eerie as old tales of unfulfilled passions stagnant upon the tongue... when is change needed before ever winding up miserable n so outta touch.?. is there any meaning to the self righteousness of what's best for me.?. repeating a cycle that rotates into strangers unable to remember that one time type of free...

Who to be.?.

Who to tell the details to.?. The secrets that make us living proof... Beneath the surface where truths are hidden... Deep in a place damn near everyone's is forbidden... So who is it one is to share the centers core with... To tell them of the fine design in which one lives... Like the enjoyment of a cool breeze on a auier night flowing through an opened window at peace in the mind... Or a tailgate lowered to lay beneath a star filled sky... Though it could be a evening cooking dinner with that one person that means the most... Where glasses or even shots tink to a toast... Then again what of the slow motion created when intimacy stroke desires... Could it be a friend is to be witnessed by a flickering fire.?. Perhaps it's the joy of family gathering for a feast... Who's to know of what touches a chuckle deep within.?. Or a soothing moment that eases fists... Maybe driving down a road that hasn't been captured by the sight... Stopping briefly to listen to natures's way of life... Yet, who will cherish the pieces that settle the nerve.?. To be trusted with the heart's very own worth... Discrete n giving every fragment of themself in return... When use is never to speak of a bond muted without words... As eyes open to every new day seeking the thrill n the calm... Holding luv softly in the center of palms...

Jus to be nice to u...

If ur hungry we can go get a bite to eat... I don"t want much in return but a conversation n some company... Maybe just chuckle over a meal as implicated.. U can go ur own way n I'll drift back into my life as the privilege would be appreciated.. Just to feed u so i know you've eaten today... To create a smile upon ur face to take u away from every other day... As a friend to enjoy a lil nibble as I'd rather not be alone... So if i could, I'd like to get u outta ur home... Simply take u out n show u a moment worth a gesture so free... To wherever you'd like to go it's my treat... From a stake juicy enough to fill u up... To the tailgate lowered as we slam some pizza jus doing us... With no strings attached to a lil time spent with me... I'd be grateful to have ur company...  I'd surely enjoy u for jus a lil while... To say i wouldn't I'd be living in denial.... For i find it soothing to be around u n I'd like to know why... Over candle lights or grabbing some chili dogs I'm down to dine... As long as it's u that joins me for a lil chitter chat I'm willing to listen before u havta go... That is if a gentleman could possibly stuff u whole... To live within a few hrs u wouldn't soon forget... With my eyes making contact above ur tits... I know it's a rare thing in today's world to be treated with respect... So consider me if u ever would wanna get out n about to gab ur gums over a lil taste test... I'd try not to bore u if i can... As I'll be waiting with a full attention span... Jus tell me where you'd like to go or leave it up to me... I promise u i jus wanna be nice to u n get some nummy...

Rare breed...

I like average... Even if they come in a rewrapped package... Someone who doesn't have much but still tries... One that knows every now n again even luv cries... The simple type that ain't never been rich... Though fight to have a lil something kissing their lips... To freely give to an other without distributing old pain... Knowing hope has faith in enjoying a gain... I enjoy an open mind... With one that owns a heart unafraid of life... A more rare breed to open up to... Comforting the feel of truly being put to use... With a conversation that doesn't havta say a word... Or talk all night talking about anything jus to be heard... As their smile in its own brings me from within... In sync with themself before looking my way to lift a grin... A unique kind willing to share a few memories made along the way to the looking back on... Where there's an unspoken connection known as the norm...

The circles end...

I remember now... Of who i was n what happened to make me become who i am... I can feel me again... N idky it's taken so long to come back to life... To feel free like all the weight has finally lifted from my heart... I see me as a child... As a teen... A young man n everything from there on n in between... As i can recall vivid memories in which I've forgotten... How did i ever forget how to live.?. To wonder lost for so long... I was so full of energy... Hope... Luv... N now I'm back in touch with me as the pieces within have finally found their place... I'm me again... Laying in a silent room listening to the sounds outside... N as i close my eyes i can go back... To replay thoughts like I'm still there... I see my mothers face... Feel the cool breeze coming in the window laying in bed... I've always been the loner who just wanted to be luv'd... The distant one that allowed my mind to get away from me... Taking me inward... Creating a fear... Stealing from my own heart, my own worth... Though here tonight is what I've waited for for so long... To reunited with the old me as i introduce him to what i don't wanna be... Trapped... Afraid... Defeated by emotions cut from the nerve... Damn it feels good to sigh... To release the pressure on my head... Not to have that feeling like drifting is all i am... As I'm still here after all this time... Smiling n able to enjoy my life... N i haven't felt this way for quite some time... Loosened up to be once again... As the real me was happy to get it in... Fearless... Ready to gain a friend... So to combine what I've learned with the truth I've hidden away, priceless... Like a child eagar to awaken to see what i can get into... The circle has found its end n now i can finally breathe... I'm safe from living with the void... With precious memories of my kids when they were lil coming back into view... N dreams of how I've always wanted to do it all... It's now that i chuckle for i cannot be stopped... Hi world... This is the real me n I'm never letting go...

Far from home...

As we rest with the engines idling wanting more... We give the road a moment of silence for its back by our tires is worn... We sleep as we straggle in one at a time... Far from home n missing out on a normal life... Yet when our eyes awaken come morning's call... It's the money that spins like wheels turning in our minds hoping to see a new dawn... One where luv'd ones faces aren't so strange to sights leaving the pavements alone... N as the truck shakes with a vibe it rocks full grown babies to sleep as we miss home... Lined up night after night for weeks... Crammed into stops along the way for our own selfish greed... Sacrificing family for wealth to roam freely with the scenery most will never enjoy... From small towns to big cities there's paper to be earned to fill the void... To gain a better life left on a horizon in the mirrors reflection... Giving what we have to a trade demanding perfection... N on nights where the smell of rain lingers to soothe the beast... We rest for a dusk will rise to be claimed that doesn't come cheap... As down the highways n the backroads we drift as we drive... Thinking about that one turn that takes us back to our families waiting with grins that shine... In the stillness of thoughts we think is this as good as it gets... There's a choice in how one chooses to live... To wander around from here to there able to take in the beauty outside the city limits... With images embedded in the head that are so very vivid... Just rolling at will looking for a good bite to eat... Knowing a home cooked meal would be so fuckin sweet...

it's ur scent...

come a lil closer, so i can sniffle me a whiff of u... just move in to my way as the breeze helps u linger perfections truce... i've missed the scent of a woman n i'd like to get used to ur smell... as one brush of ur hair in my face just flowing as it's felt... over this way u can bring ur yourself into my space... as ur skins fragrance revives me in a way life is my escape... as my nostrils open to catch ur presence leaning in to feel the comfort u create... i could find a use for u if you'd jus ease my day... as u n i could be laid up wanting more... attracted to the aroma coming from our pores... as us, attached to each others bodies not wanting to let go... content with the motionless vibe settling the nerve never again to be alone...

come on sooner than later...

accused of my own i stand alone... no matter what is done it is sitting in silence lost in a place that doesn't quite feel like home... n as the music plays i feel pieces of me drift within trying to get away from the truth... seems there's more than the tongue refuses to speak of when mentioning what my life could use... guess i've been all by lonesome long enough as the linger of the solitude just ain't fitting the mood anymore... n i'm leaning in to the future a lil more everyday n there's no one waiting for me to land as my heart pours... still i can't move wondering how much longer it's gonna take for me to get over myself... for i don't wanna keep on with the fear that's damn near faded as my mind seeks outside help... i blame me for allowing it to take a lifetime to wanna accept someone new to snuggle up next to me... i just need to do my thing to create a smile upon someone else's face as the believe in the same dream... two as one until the show comes to close... i don't want this empty void that consumes the mind controlling hope... the lifting of weight has come to free me from hiding in from eyes wanting to take a peek... n by golly i have done my time of being locked behind closed doors when others has so easily breathed... it's my turn to feel my way along to see where it is i am to belong... all i'm waiting on is a vibe that cannot be denied n this one here is gonna open n to show depths so soft... in my moment to enjoy a bond transformed by free will... mingling with an other so in tune with the rhythm of sighs carrying the same note like has a luv known as a thrill... rounded out to the opening that could never cut a hand reaching for the comfort that holds a friend all night long... adding to my story to land on her pages as we read the same final chapters that has it's own song...

tormented by self...

Sometimes... Every now n again... A thought momentarily comes to mind... N for a second, here n there, it isn't sexual... Nor stubborn behind the walls... I feel human every so often... I wonder... Dig a lil deeper than i usually allow myself to go... I quit pretending when the silence is listening to my heart... Unable to lie... Knowing I'm cheating myself... N i think, why do i over look smiles... Bypass emotion... Settling for a life of solitude... As i sit, sleep n awaken with the empty... As patience comes to a nerve that won't let go of the question that's gone unanswered... When I face me when alone... Seeking without being seen... Lingering through life, waiting in a sense... I wander in my mind for the key to open me back up... Caught in daydreams that come n go... As i can feel the hope just outta reach... Drifting... Creating a version of self that cannot come out... Fearing yet another friend to lose... To witness a cherished luv sooner or later just walk away... Mixed feelings arise... Anxiety crawls beneath the skin... There's something missing that eases my days... The belief that I'm the piece that fits is no longer an option... Awakening from dreams i wish i would've never woken up from... As the mirror reflects the truth in my eyes... Lost, n looking for what.?. Stuck in a phase... Trapped within... Accepting unfulfilled nights as a way to remain safe... Trying to avoid that ache that sneaks in to remind me that there's more... Breaking the strength down when zoned out... Scared to tune into some real shit that could make a difference... As passerbyers are picked apart... Dismantled like they deserve the judgments of what's best for me... N as convo meets the hollowness of a room in which only i reside... I remember what i was once like... Free...

The Line up...

Line then up n knock then down... One by one imagine yourself sharing life with their unique way of being found... From the early mornings to the late night ease... What is it u see for yiel yourself as u dirt off on their arms n dream.?. Witness yourself in each one of their lives... Those who has done a lil more than actually caught ur eyes... U know the few that u have thought to here n there... Go ahead, do tell Wray you've seen as it was ur heart to be spared... In an arrangement where realities combine for a moment to evolve... Which one did u sigh for more when the mind felt a calm.?.  As daydreams catered to a smile no one could see... Is it possible they have no idea you've considered emotion clinging ti them as a need.?. Sitting in silence not knowing who would soot self best... For the mind cab only pretend to enjoy what lingers in their chest... Line luv that constantly changes its face... If u had to choose, wood be the one you'd think u could believe in to forever whisper ur name.?. To fulfill all the lil fantasies from time to time... Transforming the way u live by allowing an other to recieve what u have to gon give... U missy knew how it'll pay out... Having options to go through like a line up unable to hear a sound from ur very own mouth... As ur secret interests can't decide on who to become more than strangers with... Trying to fugue out in which one will not levee a void...

When...

When all one needs is for someone to come along to makes the thoughts go away... To stop the chaos in the head that does nothing but destroy the hearts attempts to find a joy to gain... Making the mind a more settling place to live... Stopping stray tears that come from outta nowhere like a leaking sky driwning the ribs... When a friend would be nice so there's not so much alone time... To keep self from hating self when losing ones mind... So emotion can admit it's not scared of being hurt... As a comfort can heal what cannot find a way to find a worth... When the one thing needed the most is the biggest fear shaking in the chest... Causing ripples so unnecessary one refuses to give one's best... As a body would reassure a lil hope... Possibly begin to break the chains so just one can get close... Giving daydreams a different outcome that doesn't involve another night alone... Listening to the darkness take away sight just to see everything wrong as desperation moans... When something is missing from an equation one doesn't know how to solve... Wanting to fall outta luv with the torture that cripples the all n the above struggling in the middle a pause... Unable to climb from within to face someone who believes in what self has forgotten how to use... When the plot thickens n the surface is as shallow as fake smiles that are confused on how they should move...

Losin it...

Only if someone could reach in behind the smile... Down deep to feel what's truly goin on in the wild...
Scaring the heart from ever wanting to be used... Yet would it even help the cut the edges loose.?. When the thickened texture only needs to be soften by a single touch... The wonder fades knowing no one can get in to ever be considered someone to be luv'd... Though the thought is nice when the mind gets to playimg with delusions... Until the tragic truth awakens the feel that corrupted the chest with illusions... Never to properly enjoy the falling for its believed to go all the way through... Back to rock bottom as self is to lose passion hung from a noose... Set on display to be reminded of why ores not ok to open up... Damn, the linger aches when like can never evolve into luv... When shame of being unable to feel any fuckin thing... When others witness the failure to comply that fades with eyes that leak... Is it possible to wipe away the final tear so life can continue to live the way one felt it so long ago.?.  Where in the fuck is home.?......................

The funny one...

The wonder drifts if they know when the clown gets tired of entertaining everyone knowing real facial expression doesn't like acting like the paint...
In sights with a funny chuckle to pass a few moments afraid to show anything else as the fear builds a wall of humor worn upon the face...
Do they ever consider there's real depths hidden beneath the mask worn to make others smile so at least they can feel a lil joy here n there.?.
When the act is done for the day n the solitude surrounds the happiness that everyone has witnessed as an attraction that's only a front bcuz someone needs to care...
Has it ever crossed a mind that just maybe it's an helplessness finding a way to live n bcuz there's noir much within the heart worth the feel to move.?.
The lingering of a thoughts wanders through the mind if anyone has every noticed the truth of the matter when laughs are actually hung from a noose...
As the perfection of creativity desguises the pain lookin for a release that comes n goes...
N to allow it to fade is a fear of being seen as bare as rare in a form that could be identified as the loner so distant the silence triggers a smear behind closed doors protecting grins that roam...
Have they ever paid attention to the details that tell a story of having so much to give that's locked away.?.
Captured by the wits pulling strings so the delusion of sane can shield the issue of lost hope with everything to gain...

It's coming...

It's coming, i just don't know who she'll be... My chest is ready to open... Though, it doesn't need just another fling... N it's uo to me to know what's best so i need to be sure... With my eyes rotating in my head ages gotta be the cure... My reason why i should allow my luv to be shared... The whole purpose in dreams waiting to have someone who cares... So passion n desires can transform just one more time... As my everything is directed to the fylfillment of life... Until my final day as she is the onmy one that will every do... But I'm uncertain on who... I haven't a clue to what she looks like... N I'm lost on where you begin so i hide... In fear of not being able to watch her walk my way... What if i give in to the wetting one again n she passes me up due to someone taking her place.?. I don't wanna hurt anyone out wondering around... With my head on swivel disrespecting them as a void makes no sound... What if i get caught up n what i need vibes from a far.?. I'd hafta end relations n step away from doin my part... To embrace someone i can feel without ever touching their skin... Knowing damn well they're who I've missed... How's that fair to anyone who hasn't done me wrong.?. Alone i believe I'm better off... Drifting into the wind until depths match minds free to be... Making air so much easier to breathe... It's coming... N the day of, I'll stop running...

Then n now...

Careless with time as moments pass on by... Not knowing their true meaning until the heart meddles with the mind... Forcing the images to notices noticed Wyatt was overlooked... Wanting to give anything to go back so thoughts can be shook... To have one more chance to appreciate who deserved to feel more than this world has to give... In a round two where the real ones live... Yet glimpses of then n now rotate in the space between the ears... As today somehow gets away like the days of yesterday when trying to enjoy each one making memories that cheer... Not needing to repeat the past n allow another minute to escape... Knowing there's only have one shot to create a smile before life itself fades... As age sneaks in n changes the face of young to old... Attempting not to sell out though money talks so it's self being sold... With expressions unseen due to the distance in the middle of a hope that cares to see them soon... Jus to witness them living in their own movement feeling free to find a groove... N yet strangers drift needing to find their own way as even death comes to call... With precious photos to remember the good times hung upon the walls... It seems in the still frames is where we somehow get lost... In a wonder where mouthing can return to the way once upon a time ago was somewhat paused... Causing an after effect that lingers deep in the chest... Leaving a question, did we do all wet could to allow others to see our best.?.

Mirror mirror...

What is it u need me for.?. There's so many others willing to feed ur ego n pick ur worth up off the floor...  I'm. no more than a head count in ur eyes... As ur jus an other in luv with the attention to ever acceot something real in ur life... Living off of attractions that only build u up to look down on everyone else... Though it's ur heart that no one could ever help... Hiding behind the vanity that draws others into the empty taunt... As u smile n then turn around n talk scoot how others are seeking u as a want... It's a game u play to help yourself feel better in which you'll never admit... Ur too into yourself to ever come clean from the nonsense... Making u no more than a feind to the masses tuned in on u... N yet not a one of them u will ever have a use... Ur jus absorbing the energy that u will never become...  Lost in ur own awaiting what you'll never give into as u go completely numb... Though days will fall behind u as u age with time... No longer to depend on to the flesh in which you've been defined... What will u rely on once the wrinkles begin to set in.?. For others will be forced to see who u truly are deep within... A has been, a fake, a bitter azz dwelling in ur emptiness... Who is it u think u are thinking ur better than anyone else when ur yet to join the rest.?. Back to the basics in which you've refused to accept as a real individual... U won't resemble yourself one day as u drift from sights no longer a spectacle... Humbling u as a different version able to adapt to not having ur fame... Or taring u from limb to bcuz ur thirst for everyone to admire u has gone away...

Torn...

Comforted by the fact that self cannot be hurt if no ones aloud to get in... There's a linger that aches at the end of each day that feels alone in ways natural functions are derived of true grins... Brain is the heart wanting to give itself away as the mind haat tendon in control... Sitting in solitude is the insanity of regaining sane when the isolation wad never meant to become all that's known... As the pain slower eats at anything ever being able to adapt to an other willing to be enjoyed... It's like watching others walk backwards so thoughts don't havta admit the void... Lost in Monet's replaying how emotion jus took to many fuckin hits... Believing in anyone is jus not an option due to the price paid is the reality faced... Losing someone new would cripple the interest in ever wanting to say a certain name... When in actuality its a slow death awaiting the unfulfilled passiin left to collapse in tears that fall... Behind locks n tucked away is a place of many twists that conflict with the outside world as selftalksto walls... Afraid to open up for one figures saloon doors that swing both ways... Allowing them to come n go at will as desires fade... So it's the silence that feels right n oh so wrong... As the chest craves to be touched by a head laid upon it jus to listen to the rhythm of its song... Needing someone else's words to complete the message forgotten by one to many attempts to bounce back... It seems strength has different meanings when the light comes in the mornings calling to have at another day with no one in the sack... Leaving the bed inmade jus to return to the same ol bs night after night... Asking one question on both ends of why...

Lettin em go...

The one thing self can't have is the time it takes to know a friend is in the making of more than hoping... Tends to turn out the demand of gimme just before the name calling is as impatient as the selfish luv twisting emotions coping... It's never about slowing the moment down to relate to the surge wanting to live... When it's a comfort to last sought out as strangers wanna attempt what they say they have to give... All being the same ol feeling losing their mindset of how to find distance in the soace in beaten bodies su the heart can sigh... Poof, goes another memory cut short of a later in life hand in hand due to the now or never kinda mine mine mine... So it's a life of wonder that jus doesn't seem too fit the mood... As eyes gander at other things the the exterior beauty that thinks it's jus so cute... Too soon is a thing no one tends to relate to... As words clsim so much juts before the now is the walking away from a so called friend cut loose... Sad in a sense is emotion never truly getting to dig in to the who that never had a chance to come out n play... Placing yet another face in the collection of those who jus couldn't comprehend the true gain...

The full shabang...

Bared n attending life before u... Opened up n giving u unlimited access to my use... Who would u turn into.?. If i was to drop my gaurd n get lose... Altering u to see how it is i truly move... If I'd rather be nowhere else but witness to me in ur eyes seen as the only thing in the room... Striped of insecurities that went poof... As i true form waitin patiently to feed u fruit... Jus wanting my moment to slow myself as the truce... Mind removing everything that isn't about us looking at the horizon in our view... On a daily being close to the way comfort eases sighs so smooth... Settling the fact that u believe in me on levels friends simply cannot lose... As a lifestyle compliments hard work gathering loot... I'm talking about the full shabang placed in ur hands so u too can feel the proof... Feeling my heart as ur head rests on my chest never wanting it to end too soon... So we as us can plant some roots... Creating our own woos... Knowing who's who... Doesn't that sound so cool.?.

Bowing down...

I like eating on the edge of the bed... Where ur azz meets the edge... It's a better view down three on my knees... N the angle allows me to enjoy the way u breathe... With ur legs spread so i have access from the drug to the back... A my tongue slides through ur cheeks to ur clit in which creates a gasp... I'm literally in luv with tasting pussy on my lips... The smell of it awakens the beast within... With my eyes open for the duration of the pleasure it gives me as i lick on u...  Kissing n sucking n playing with ur moans in the loose... Freed to become a sound that touches me Kline a melody... I crave the feel of tgat soft wet texture pouring from hormones fur that's no helping me... N i can't help but to fantasies about u laid out upon ur back... Ssh, just lay there n do what comes as natural as its ur azz getting smacked...

Truly effected...

After goin in n goin through the highs to land at the lows where the door of the heart reopens to get goin finalizing tha fallin out... Loose takes a different mindset once the realization styles the nerve that there's no one needed to become who the mirror can smile n with chuckling lil sounds... Have crazy for facing this world alone with a comfort that a friend comes from within prior to acquiring a body coding the distance in between attractions... Aware that most are lookin for a special kinda enjoyment yet go abhor the process backwards seeking satisfactions... N the outcome of ever lookin at one single individual any different than everyone else verbally saying they're unique is besides the point of interest... For life in its own had changed in its comprehensions of wants conflicting with needs that people tend to reverse jus to feel emotion leeching in to the way fingertips roam to touch the ribs... Seems gettin caught up is jus a matter of time being redirected for a lil hope in relations if it is to ever be... For the way stood had to turn n walk away from the chances taken truly effected who the up n up couldn't rely on others puttin in on mutual dreams... The feeling gets lost along the way of ever believing in temptations due to the picking apart being a acknowledgement of what self doesn't do well with... N it transforms into a seperate type of linger that stings silently due to there's something inside that would be so grateful to an other who would step the fuck up n be sane as the ease is no longer missed...

Friends first...

If ur popping off at the lips on some bs I'm out... I ain't listening to that kinda immature shit coming from ur mouth... Ur human before ur a gender so would advise u to keep ur mine straight.... Since ur so different n claim to be a real mans escape... Speak like a friends bcuz u have one time to act like ur shit don't stink... Like a ghost that don't exist imma sidestep yr demands was n needs... That whole friend thing u wanna neglect ain't my style so all i can suggest is for u to mature... I'm not someone who wants to feel the flip flop twist my honest depths opened up as u forget who i am as ur supposive cure... To attract me ur mind hasta be intact... Able to maintain on any level of relations that never strays from luv's grasp... No matter the situation, like is a neutral flow of comforting the hope... That lil thing that most allow to linger when it needs to feel a place caked home... Without all the babbling to make an other's emotion tweak taking blow after blow... Life isn't too me something I'm willing to give awayto someone who cannot function living upon their own metaphoric throne... Not me... I don't want to play man vs woman as u tri to get ur way jus so u can turn aroynd n do the same ol shit while i change untoi cannot see u in my dreams... I need not be torn from behind let alone face to face... You'll find ur true self solo as fuck mousing the feel of my name...

Put to use...

U ever had someone openly admit they fantasies about u.?. N if they ever got u alone they'd enjoy the flavor in which u taste... Eating every orgaam as u moan for more... With ur legs spread so u could feel every stroke licking u from front to back... Trying to suck the pigmentatuon from ur skin as ur clit would smoothly be rotated around so delicaty until it was time to slide deep inside of u... Reaching for the sound of u gasping for air... N as it digs it throbes from pure excitement from listening to u accept every fuckin inch as ur nent over to be fucked from behind until u cum all over a thick juicy cock penetrating u... Jus to feel the burying of a face going back down to finish off every nerve demanding for it to stop bcuz it tickles... As ur forced onto ur back with throat grabbed snug into a choke... Shoving u full of thrusts jus to watch ur facial expression beg the feeling to keep moving... Cumming... Harder... Faster... Hearing get that shit as u say fuck u as a sound growls like an explosion inside of u so fuckin worth the time it took to enjoy u wrapped around some really good dick... Mmmm... Yeah... Fuck yeah...

Realities twist...

I have this one in my head that goes a lil something like, u know ur the only one who could ever get up n under the thickness my fuckin skin...

Yet, ur smirk offsets my grin as u control the situation from ever having a chance to be a win win...

Knowing damn well what I'd do if you'd ever think about giving in...

For me to taste the tenderness in the texture of ur lips...

With my hands slowly caressing the curve of ur hips...

Allowing my fingertips to flow upward to create a gentle tickle deep in ur ribs...

Thoughts spin as motion sinks within...

In wonder of why you'd rather pass me by just to be missed...

U must not know of satisfactions finest details openning up the valves of the heart to live...

With intent in my head that chases u around inside my wits...

Crisp detailed images linger in my mind's fix...

The crave is real enough to give u pieces of me to recieve ur smiles kiss in a daily sip...

So i pretend not to shive a get...

Due to it ain't me u desire as motion is to cling to when tongues flip...

Delusional is the ripping of a moment opened up to witness the design of bare facts resemble u at the top of my list...

Although all i can do is ramble in the silence trying not to throw a fit...

Sounds childish...

Maybe a daydream in which i wish...

Yet , in my head it spins...

Knowing there's is a reality twist...

To u, i really ain't shit.!.

Don't ever wonder why i stopped smoking weed n hit the road

Why is there such a need in emotion when a friend is what's craved the most.?. Kinda seems backwards when everyone is after the feeling instead of an honest toast... Ready to give into a stranger they hardly know... Just to wind back up at square one with more weight in the heart feeling so fuckin alone... Always thinking it's someone else who is to complete self as the mind roams... Over thinking everything but the one detail that defines the worth of a real home... As actions repeat the same ol silliness chasing after every other passerby that claims to be royalty without a throne... With an endless depth that cannot be reached for the digging of the chest has yet to be filled with self being known... Cheap thrills gather luv'rs at best playing house damn near cloned... Believing in the sound created by hormones more than an honest use as they moan... Demanding the feeding on attractions that tenderize the char still to sizzle the hope... It's like people like their feelings flame broiled as long as the body is being groped... In a catch n release policy when expectations piont at everyone else on somewhat of a loan... As closets collect bones thrown into the memories past talking about whoa... Guess living off the surge that rushes with the pulse is more important than somehow acting grown... N yet real is 100 when 99 percent of that bs has been spent on believing in words that ain't worth a hoe... Though folks pretend to be with it but like putting on a show... Taking hit after hit when a lil patience is what is considered to be a foe... With the gimme now n we'll determine later why hate formed in between differences full blown... Hearing distasteful tongues telling on ones own... I'm good, i don't want none, no no no...

The best damm version...

One hasta be who they truly are... Without the status on relations or being single tampering with their heart... Who it is beneath the surface when a front isn't needed is rare... N for anyone brave enough to jus be is as real as an emotional tare... Yet to remain in tact as the only one they know how to be... That shit is what makes an attraction come to life from within dreams... In one form where eyes see beyond the shell in which most hide behind... In which there's a depth more mature than what any other can clsim to give life... Not having to check the mirror for whom lingers jus below the skin forcing smiles to fake out other opponents... Knowing there one chance to enjoy the missy beautiful creation we all share in each n every moment... With a patience that chuckles bcuz it can relate to choices have actions n reactions making decisions to simply live... In the best damn version possible as the good n the bad are equally satisfying... N only those who can comprehend is on another level as it itself is mesmerizing... To feel complete before ever adding an other to the mix of joy... So no one is to take part in a game to be played as if a toy... In a seperate kinda individuality able to cope with a mindset that can think... Not being the smartest but efficient enough to stand on ones own never to rely on wants over needs... In tune with what it takes to evolve in a true state of happines formed by digging in to self... N it is that person that is the reason everything else can vividly be felt...

Work ur magic...

Touch me with ur summer breeze formed in ur smile n warm kisses n unthaw my heart... Jus by being u, feel me come from within n release my version of a work of art... We can mingle in the middle of what we make of the way life is to play out... As ur name is the one thing that tenderises my lips as it forms in my mouth... Then shade me from the sun like a shadow draped on my skin like the night feeling me up with a soothe... With a stare to awaken what seek in my eyes to bring to life what no ither could move... As a single finger stirs me from within by a simple stroke playing with my flesh... Reach for my heart n watch the horizon transform colors chasing the sun until the moon hears the beaat growl from the inner makings of the chest... Like the winter giving into springs beauty that blossoms so elegantly... Listen to the rhythm pump a beat flowing in perfect harmony sith ur very own individuality... Standing as u sway tempting me to dance the the music created in a connection only u n can vibe to... Loosen me with one fingertip upon my lips so i know words alone need not mention what we can put to use... So dig in to me opening up to how ur sweet prrsence causes my interest to nibble a lil bite... To taste ur pheromones escape ur body to intice me into a thrill I'd luv to call mine...

It's on u...

I ain't typical n i like the way u move... Kick back n find a chuckle n jus feel how a lil company can help u vamoose... We may just find a conversation put to use... Living on the outside of the thoughts of who could possibly comfort the wonder locked away in daydreams running from the noose... U should step outta what's become a norm so overrated there's a need to cut loose... Free yourself for a moment to mingle with someone like me in which u juts might decide to  choose... Yet the choice is urs to u load ur day upon me as we sit alone in a room...  To collaborate with a few chosen words so vent or jus enjoy the simplist things to fulfill the mood... I ain't whatcha think i might be from a far wondering of my use... We could walk for a bit n feel the flow of how we naturally define the chemistry bouncing to a vibe up under the moon... Talking about the now of gettin it in while the chance is a duece... Peace with a piece of mind attached to the sharing of a friendship in a unique kinda groove... Or maybe jus take a ride with me to out in the middle of nowhere as we zoom... Gathering seconds where gestures add up to the a more gratifying indulgence giving proof... As lost is the best place too be found in the time it takes to realize who's truly who... It's on u...

nibble a bite...

right where ur earlobe meets ur jaw... lemme nibble a few whispers jus before u unthaw... playin into my way of doin what i want... ssh, jus move to the feel of we being us... goin with the flow of sighs filling the air... feeling fingertips in motion n eyes that stare... soft kisses felt on the side of the neck... lips move to the curve down to the chest... with a pitter patter of pecks loosening to the mood... one, two, three lil sucks create a moan to fill the room... with hands pinned against the wall... above ur head as my tongue drips as ur defenses fall... caught in a moment where sight meet... n smiles slighty lift hormones through a desire fed... slowly caressing ur arms until ur cheeks are touched... jus to taste unspoken words in sync with the rush... breathing heavily as the arousal awakens nerves... knowing intentions at their best truly lurk... as ur spun around to feel me pressed against ur body so right....  grabbing the back of ur hair in a grip to make u feel alive... wanted needed to comfort the beast within me... mingling with ur own monster chuckling to be pleased... to be taken advantage of as teeth bite a lil inches going down ur spine... arching ur back as ur azz craves to be grabbed... a squeeze settles the thrill of enjoyment that will forever last... gently removing layers under garments hide ur skin... with a couple slaps to excite ur grin... u turn n sink ur fingers into my shoulders... twitching from me twirling my way up ur inner thighs to unfold her... she's wet n ready but i jus wanna play... having my way with the surrounding area until u say my name... reaching for my head to show me ur craving to me licked... allowing me to witness what it is you've actually missed...

opening n closing doors...

how can i get close enough to get u behind closed doors.?. stealing a moment so u can see me find a comfort to intrigue a lil more... to get to the point if our hands can reach to be held... i haven't been a romeo in some time yet i feel a bit different as to admitting i believe u are felt... i don't know what it is but i can't resist a convo to find out why i think about u... so, how can i tell u i've come to a cross roads of interest already on the move.?. playing me like a rhythm coming form the chest... creating a curiosity of what life would be like if you'd give in to the mind slowing to a rest... i wonder of the  way we could connect when in motion... coming to a sigh of where in the fuck have u been as i was using up pointless emotion... thing is, how can loosen up without all the bs you've already seen.?. i ain't typical n i feel u could relate to something to come along that's actually real... i need no one to catch me for i come complete... n i think that would be a plus for u jus so u could find a lil room the breathe... it' not u on ur knees i wanna set my sights on if we could get away from everyone n jus dig for a fortune... i jus wanna figure out if there's a way to find a cling to the skin as the night shortens... as we dabble in to the mind opening doors for eyes to gather how rare the tongue can speak... stripping us down to the rawness of dropping guards with a couple smiles to adapt to the rotation that brings the daylight back around as we sleep...

No answer to be found...

Why do i havta carry the remains in my heart.?. Weighing down my mind as i cry when too much alone time tares me apart... Who is it no one can't seen to feel... To get to know someone past silhouettes accepting something real... Why can't i get over a luv i wanted in my life.?. Lingering on n crippling the nerve to open up to the hype... Why can't an other drag the burden around for a change.?.  Why does it gotta be me fallin into a luv others cannot help but to hate.?. Ann i so fuckin different I'm not what they seek.?. Is it after so long they lose the feeling of comfort in the way they breathe.?. I jus was be me of all things n nothing more... Why am i not what that one person is looking for.?. Does it havta be lugging around the wonders that haven't an answer to give.?.  N who in the fuck lies about dreams ti brake hope into pieces that will never again fit.?. Causing confusion to be driven into thoughts the mind cannot release...  Unable to even hear a goodbye whisper on with a lean... What is it people are out to get ahold of ad I'm never enough.?. In between the honesty of the free i know won't work due to complications that deserve to be luv'd... Left to free them from the heartache to come that's foreseen by it jus doesn't add up... Keepin shit respectable when the tongue moves never to be hushed... Where's that face that embeds itself to stick around.?. So the reel in the head doesn't havta recreate imaginary figures that disappear when night comes along listening to a single hat pound...

Over so fast...

When dreams last longer than luv could ever fall from the eyes... The belief lingers to a standstill goin to waste in the mind... Hope drifts from interest stalling to a hault... Finding self in disgust with emotion always changing not long after the fall... As reason fades from smiles in mirrors living forsomething else... There's a different kinda worth that collects self felt... Feeling passion transform from depending on others into a life alone... Goin further with a comfort without the pain ever to reevaluate a place caked home... Safe in the moment of trusting no one for they always collapse... Blowing their own lips into the wind tgat carries kisses away with the past... When down redirects its meaning from for one to descending... Depths reach an all time low once realizing nothing lasts through the pretending... Goin with the flow moving flames until the flicker goes out... Putting desires to rest as hands release the silence awaiting sound... For the now to catch up to the future n lose time the heart cannot get back... Becoming delusional in a period where feelings die in the boom that crashed... Tears dry up quicker than forever ever happens is the blatant truth... Refusing to rely on what will eventually leave claiming to have a use... When the spark only ignites a stranger to define a friend all but forgotten... To return to how things were prior to the makings of never to be the same somehow rotten...

right back to nah...

It seems lonely is the only way to stay safe... But damn the feeling of that irritating ache... Jus to be free from the a friend changing their mind... One actually hasta enjoy the silence while the heart is deprived... It's line weighing options that make no fuckin sense... Either wait for the end or kelp up ones defense... Living life without the comforts of hope wrapped up in the arms... Or reach for depths that cannot be find due to trust issues playing their part... Pain is triggered as the brain seeks for an answer... Ignoring natural emotions left to die as some sorta unwanted cancer... Becoming lost yet free from ridicules that eventually surface... As bombs go off destroying friend zones by cuttin off those trying to get close enough to something endless... N it's hard to be finest with self when certain nights keep one awake... Goin down every road that defenders memories due to new ones can't maintain... Drifting into a trans of it be nice to talk for a bit... Then it's right back to nah, fuck that shit... It's almost line a jeckle n hyde spin off where reality clashes with dreams... Showing self can only hide for so long before needing to breathe... Coming up for air After being smothered by images trapped in the head... As fear keeps passion in line so the hurt cannot feel like one is dead... But that's the similarity nothing else can can describe... Going about every day having others believe on such a lie... Quarantining self behind closed doors bcuz one more blow will kill what desire is left... Knowing the chest pounds to release outs worth as it fights to survive doin its best... Although timeless is a figment of the imagination scattered into pieces gathered along the way... Even though it would be nice asf to hold an other at the end of some days... The refusal of attachments becomes a way of life... It jus happens when use simply doesn't give a fuck about random interests wanting to take flight... To leap into the unknown so carelessly it petrifies every nerve... It's a real struggle to admit in the mirror that someone else's voice would be put to use... Once the independence creeps in n the belief of not needing anyone is all to real... When all the good is guarded it jus cannot be used even if one had healed... The solitude wins of the recovery drags out longer than needs due to the levels dug into to give ones all... It's as if hearing ones own heartbeat is better than the crawl... Attempting to redefine self after the big bang excludes the partaking in a new find strangers world... Sent back to a prior life one shouldn't have abandoned as thumbs twirl... The distance will develop a stillness that appreciates beyond left the fuck be... So no one can get beneath the skin jus to one day leave...

for a moment...

touch me like u wanna feel fingers flow with ur curves... yeah i'm a man yet, i'm human n wanna be felt as a worth... with a lil sensitivity behind closed doors to ease my day in my mind... not that i don't want anyone to know but it be jus between u n i... be the reason i come around for a lil comfort settling the nerve that never rests... from a place u seem to talk allot about deep within ur chest... move me with a sigh keep in me safe from others who jus cannot get to me the way u do... open me up n dig in through the surface as we flow through a night cuttin the rough edges loose... find me in under dimmed lights where sex isn't but a thought of a possibility... i'm talking about some real shit where we collide n sink into a moment put to use before the mornin backs back around n we go back to our individuality... let ur fingerprints slide across my skin for ur pleasure n witness how i react... in the now of u n i jus chillin n gettin close enough to adapt to a convo far away from our pasts... tease with a slight tickle to let me know ur there... tryin out a lil tlc with a side of chuckles togo with a mood that fits smiles paired... reflections of their own lip bitten tryin not to move at the speed of light... jus allowin what happens to be in the contact beneath the hands pressed against my life... it be nice to enjoy a friend for a lil bit... n maybe the clothes will come off or not n that's fine either way due to if it is to be it'll be lit... but tonight can we jus roam around in the dark n be for a while not wantin to back out in this crazy world.?. without the claimin of labels of me being urguy n u being my girl... maybe with some music playin low in the background playin along to the beauty of bodies laid up... n nah i ain't talking about fallin deep into some other dimension thinkin about luv... jus keep shit simple by directing positive vibes to the points of interest we so need... together we can be different side by side jus before we slip of n dream with my face buried into u like there's nowhere else i'd rather be... 

too much...

When u treat me like a feeling u don't want no more, that's when my emotion dies all over again... N I ain't lookin to go back to the darkness luv causes so it's gonna be that fuckin hard to get in to my heart... Let's jus say i don't wanna sensor out n shake from the vibe joltin my chest... Changin the way I relate to others who haven't done shit to me but level up n silence the alarms... I like it real n it's too fuckin much to get to know people with their gaurds up... N to free from some who go from one to the next talking about fuck everyone when it's self... Seeking an other to fix the missing pieces lost from shattered mirrors unable to see straight... Never owning ones own n taking some shit out on others who don't deserve the harm when felt... There's no way to get to me living mine unless i see without a doubt ur on some other shit... N even then time only tells so i haven't gotten it on me to wait around... Solo n rollin on my own prolly until the day I die n that's jus me... I've been burnt n like me too much to change for a temporary type that never tends to feel how my all truly pounds... I'll fuck ya head up on the pivot of laughter before i ever allow u to dig into my depths... On the loose n in no need of an attachment clingin on for empty comforts... Gimme gimme gimme ain't my style of expecting bcuz it's way too fuckin much for me to entertain... So ride or die with that frfr 100 bullshit most has done used 99% up of trying to get others to notice what's torn... N I can't even sling meat due to the pulse it spikes in the way I like mingling with the potential that turns me on... There's a fine line where umpfh n passion collide n I ain't nothing but honest... U can't twist me to a ring as I drip from fingers that were suppose to care enough... Jus to hate me when the ends that comes sooner than promises whisper claimin I'm the bomebest... I hear lies n I need no set backs bcuz my trust rely's on me making decisions that count on fingers of earnings gained for life to get better... I'd rather do me n configure thoughts that escape me most of the time... Triggering a lil interest if possible from a far of an image of who u truly are once I've licked u in my mind... I'm no whore nor someone ur used to as it's too fuckin much to speak on as lips move to me being all mine... I don't wanna tango with a enemy in the makings when I've opened up to bare myself... There's nothin u can do to surprise me even though ur smile is quite nice as it's something I don't wanna miss... It'll take more than cuteness to venture so freely within me for I know f the power u could posses... Been there n I jus ain't into the shallows captivating my life n what it is I'm doin... N yea, maybe I should give in eventually but there's things I'm jus not good with... As my truths will not fall short of purpose if u fail to deliver ur end of meeting in the middle of gettin to where I'm goin... That monster u hide that hasn't calmed the fuck down when it cannot get what it wants doesn't impress me... If I'm to dabble I'll need a more sensible setting that resurrects a reason to have u near me come mornings light... In a different kinda motion that is as foreign as I am to others lookin at me like some sorta answer in which I do not understand... Though I know I haven't met someone quite like the me I've become from the dark side...

Reestablishing self...

Maybe it's the easy some of us luv... Unable to transfer emotion su easily from one to the next as if anyone can be felt when touched... As if what was meant not a thing past getting to know someone... With pages from a story written. From the heart left alone n torn in two senses of the word as a new chapter must begin... As faces change n names differ in sound when coming from within... Having depths reached just a few times until the shut down has nothing else to spare or give... As time spins n eyes look away from stares wanting in to see what lives... Dig they say bcuz they're not live the others... Yet if everyone heard is similar who's telling the truth of being more than a luv'r.?.  Purhaps change is needed or persay self jus hasta stop thinking so much... Giving enough time to enjoy the presence of a new friend that's in no rush... Hoping to believe just once n it lasts longer than the hype losing again... Could it be the one in the mirror is so easy to get over when it's all said n done.?. When opened to be seen in rare form edge vulnerabilities allow the safe zone to ease up... It Just might be good thing to have a couple or so cone n go... This way we can learn to adapt to what makes us wanna fall into moans... Showing the same smiles prior relations has overlooked... With a thought of i ain't what anyone is looking for that needs to be shook... In the wake of worth. There's a slight chance we just haven't overcame ourselves to evolve mentally... Settling feelings as a second nature n putting ti rest the dary tales of destiny... Knowing there's not just one person who we can dive into for a moment to do more than dream... Eventually if we don't accept anything less than what we are the desire will find a way to breathe... After watching attachments fade n hands feel along their way in the dark... Resurrected with a tingle creating a fresh spark...

Off the grid...

Out into the sticks where no one seems to wanna go... The peace of mind awaits like the heart wanting to go home... Into the silence where nature gives comfort to enjoy life... One is able to sit n sigh without the chaos of a voncrete jungle filled with cluttered minds... Free is the feeling of fresh air purifying the lungs... As rest consumes the body of the unwanted rush... In solitude with a smile as the simplest thing ever needed is to be left alone... Out in what others consider the middle of nowhere as distance is to be roamed... Off the grid n listening to the sounds in a more natural sense... Back to the necessities of space where land n water have been untouched... At one with the sun wamring the skin jus before the moon gives chase as the eyes fall in luv... Set on a different horizon come morning n night... There's jus no way to express the beauty without ever walking off with the wildlife... Where mountains shape the scenery so perfectly... N every living thing has its own inique individuality... Beyond the limits where civilizations attempt to own ones self... Where the edgs of hope n doom collide... There's an invisible line that one can cross to relieve the well being of the social hype... Moving at a different pace in no need of time... In a moment that lasts longer than the constant grind... With streams that flow down to lower grounds... It's a high that helps sight see the true purpose seeking an outlet spoken without a sound... From the snow tipped peaks ti the beaches below... Anywhere is good where people refuse to linger with moans... As waves crash on the shores creating good vibes in the heart... Giving more than a reason to loosen up n shut off the alarms...