Idk how many times I've turned away from the mirror with a tears falling from the eyes... As the whisper of fuck life shakes my pupils n i can't face myself bcuz i know who i truly am in my mind... Wasted n tucked away in the silence where no one could ever reach me... I jus didn't resemble myself n everything around me wasn't worth the living it took to believe i was free... Trapped in isolation without a friend within as the walls keep closing in... Tweaking my smile until it was tilted into a grin... As my reflection showed me i wad no longer the same... N at times i wished it would all end so i could be done with the hate... Lost i fell deep as age changed my face... Awakening to every morning to the sane ol that i couldn't escape... I wanted out n cane close to digging my way into my grave... Unable to stare back au myself i eventually caved... Found the floor without a bed but wad better than a seat behind a wheel with no shower to bathe... Just to feel it slip away again as of there was nothing in this fuckin works to be gained... I was my worst enemy though i wad the only friend i had... N it didn't add up in the confusion when i did the math... N living, fuck, i mentally killed myself night after night... Making empty rooms more crowded than the space between my ears listing the fight... Alone i sat n contemplated how death would take all the pain away... As i cried for i was afraid... Living in fear of what i might do if it had gotten any worse... Listening to my tongue taste all the things that hurt... I felt distant n sucked into a more darker place in which i was constantly torn... As my mind snapped n somehow a light came on... Though i remember the endless disbelief that drained me dry... Having to gather reasons to move on n collect my life...
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