the trifecta of how i became alive...

i buried myself deep within her... expressed my luv n found eyes blinkin through a blur... it was my word that i gave that did not budge... yet, she returned my luv as if she had no use as i was crushed... time opened up to drive me into her pits... i did not know she was empty n there was no way for me to land within... seems i drifted beneath her shell that turned out to be stronger than i could eva be... then again, i know her truths as my lips shall neva free.. as she asked a few dozen times as if she needed a reason for me to cling to her the way i did... i couldn't help but to feel her deeper than i've eva felt anyone as life came to my ribs... changin my face in more ways than one... from the wonder of who to the luv shared i ended up left on the other side of numb... somewhere i neva thought she'd send me off to die alone... i've seen her depths n it's more like an unfortunate broken home... there's no truths behind words that revealed intent as life rolled on... so without her, i kept goin... found my answers standin in the mirror in which i forgave myself... findin pieces of what i'm lookin for along the way where daydreams somewhat help... here is me, peepin like a tom in no need of a replacement but a true friend like i've neva had... as i say my past can lterally kiss my azz... one two three, i watched em fail me in luv with a substance more than they could eva feel me... booze to pills that sound a pair of em doped up n hatin everything about the way i breathe... no, i haven't any time for the chamber to unload in my direction... luv is suicide jus in case i failed to mention... emotional torture set in place so desire chases em around... so fuckin in luv with the way their moans sound... as only the one got deep enough to teach me what i need to know... as the last one brought me back to life by showin me who i am before my reflection caught on to where she was in her dome... runnin like the others, away from what could hurt em the way i couldv'e neva initially taken that kinda neglect... so i rest easy with where i've been as i will neva return to listen to their type of interest... as selfish as it may sound i don't need a half azz woman nowhere within my hearts contentment fallin from self they way they need someone to give into em... hmmm...