better off alone or nah.?.

being ok with being alone is cool until one needs an other to talk to... as living in solitude will make the heart wonder who in the fuck mind is talking to... silence will turn the single life into an empty place sitting alone... ok for the most part but wondering where that friend is to come on home... then the thoughts kick in of not being able to get up n go anywhere without telling someone where self is going... as the process is like fuck it if that's the case for them to know what self is constantly doing... yet the feel of pillows change when there's a body close... having that comfort through the nights to help the sleep take an affect worth the emotional dose... as the everyday thing kicks in as there's no time for self to be have a moment to do as one pleases jus ruins the mood... thinking maybe moving slow can get used to the feel of being around someone on a regular n not wanting to run from within the same room... feelings dip when relations claim the way quiet nights cater to the comfort of not wanting to be hurt.... forcing the drift that creates the loneliness in which becomes a way of life not believing in words... but to hear a tongue whisper ones name as chuckles form smile in the dark... oh the moments that give joy jus feel different depending on where ones mind goes at the sounds of alarms... waking to mornings in routines that tend to get old as fuck... never truly finding anyone worth it is the culprit of the twist that keeps desires clinging to the crave of luv... lost when there's no light to see a face laying with eyes closed... but who is that friend that'll never fade from the enjoyment as days into sleeping habits together doze.?. after spending most of life feeling like there's no one to share memories with that have all but been forgotten... there's a connection between the head n the chest that gets to plotting... listening to the walls echo sounds from the imaginations grips... deliberately playing with the notion of does self want to interrupt an other out there doing what they feel is best for them as this type of nonsense never touches the lips... in the asylum locked away from the word a selfishness becomes of ways set in time... knowing if self doesn't break the cycle there will be nothing to remember but the bitterness that give reason to the why's... yet why can't one remain on their own n be as content as they choose.?. seems the balance of who it is is the ultimate decision that determines depths on the loose...