1 hell of a goodbye

1st arguement. those words chosen n spoken 2 b meant 2 hurt. im out, its a wrap, done. its over rated n 2 my ears @ a loss 2 the sounds made mumblin words. im not up 2 a life filled with everything needin 2 b fixed. if we can not talk. there's nothin 2 say. u can have the bullshit. iv been there b4 n i will stray away from the nest. kickin it over without violence, watchin it fall 2 its death. im not good with relations beatin n shaken beyond repair. im not built 2 withstand a luv in a way that no1 cares. n if it comes down 2 no longer bein friends, sorry but i cant do it 2 myself again. when my happiness i hold 2 myself clinched in my very own hands. wonderin if we can co-exist with the pain that everyone dreads. its not worth the lost time it takes 2 get that far n wind up in an empty bed. some things aint meant 2 last n when it gets 2 that point, i wont turn my head n blush. relations has its moments from the very first time 1 lays down their touch. from distant eyes 2 closed fists, i know when nuffs enough 2 say the least. but within each other i believe no1 needs not 2 tame 1 anothers beasts. yet allowin it 2 stretch its lungs as it lives n a window given 2 breathe. it does need its well bein squeezed n tampered with, 4 it 2 bleeds. yes iv faced n i know of the blinks peekin n long stares lookin in the mirror on the past. realizin where it went wrong as i can only try 2 firmly hold on as long as it lasts. thou i'll never repeat a situations i c comin with a bitter sour end. it'll get chalked, outlined. as im livin my life n holdin my fine line in the palms of my hands btween real n pretend. seein what loves bigger picture has planned as we playwith the thought of a safe place 2 remain. tucked snug beneath the days under the nights that gives in2 the breakin of a new day. attemptin 2 stay as i'll hopefully still b here when i lift my lids n awake. i cant go 2 sleep @ night doin impressions imitatin luvs as bait. wakin 2 sumtin that wont make me drift n pass as we c each other by. jus live n let live in our present presence or it'll b 1 hell of a goodbye.