ready

i got so lost learnin lessons, confused, tryin 2 find my own reasons, i forgot who i was many times ovr, changin faces, waitin on sumtin 2 show me da way, slowly gettin me 2gethr b4 i broke wasnt so easy, u wouldnt believe da things iv done along dis journey tryin 2 find sumthing i was missin, tryin 2 make sense of wat was goin on, findin a lost cause witin me, ovr n ovr, always searchin, no where near who i am 2day,da man standin b4 u wit wat lil i hav 2 offr. there was so many lies, games, forcin da lack of trust, neva bein truely happy n da face of a friend, lessons well worth da time endured, its sad 2 say, n i wish i could change damn near everything, yet i wouldnt b me, cuz it helped me along my way, as i was hopin-knowin whered id wind up, becomin me has been a task 2 say da least, so many dirty deeds, lost friends, losin me in da fight tryin 2 find wat it is im good 4, helpless @ times, yet i struggled 2 look 4 all da pieces, pickin n dropin them so many times, hidin as many as i could gather, attemptin 2 place da birth of a new man back 2gethr, eventually, n as i tried, i found it was leavin me wit holes here n there, cracked bruised n scared, but in betta condition den those iv crossed, its wat i was, who i was, always feelin so ovrwhelmed wit a lack of luv, a friendless loner cuz no1 was worth da time 2 bring me out da slump of my own tortuerd prison, yet 4 da laast few yrs iv tried rightin my wrong, correctin my past, still i find myself appologizin face 2 face wit those i cant seem 2 face, no1 should havta put up wit wat i delt 4 so long, its a trip da things u learn n become 2 believe, n how 2 treat others on da way 2 realism, n im truely sorry 4 da crud, time passed, doin da same ol sh!t day 2 day, slippin, den i realized i was growin in2 da man i am, 7-7-07, da day i had enough of bein me, willin 2 change n become wat i was meant 2 b, thanks MICKEY, luv u, u gave me me back, helped me c wat was wrong in my life, trustin in ur words gave me da comfort i hav 2day, u c dis woman opened my eyes cuz she saw i had more 2 giv, gave me a gasp of fresh air, n i ran wit it, jus 2 bad she wasnt round long nuff 2 c wat she helped create, a true man @ heart, im always in her debt, now burried n gone, luv u, she touched my heart, dis lil ol lady was da sh!t, bcuz of her i learned witin me where da man was forced 2 hide, witout wastin time i was on a recon mission, we became 1 in da same, n here i am, but not b4 goin thru da changes, in memory of a friend i lost 2 soon, i promised neva 2 get lost again, n wit dat i had a lil more help, c there was a certain sum1 dat gav reason 4 a lil while spent in da way i moved, yet it came 2 close, 4 wat mattered da most, jus didnt click btween 2 worlds, lessons learned, i think i get point, n i think its my time, i dont belive in signs, but 4 sum reason i think i had 2 grow up b4 i could do wat iv been meanin 2 do, n theres sum1 who knows where this is goin, cuz jus maybe, timin is everything, needin 2 live thru da bullsh!t b4 u wake up n join da world, n i believe im ready, a man standin wit purpose, willin 2 bend 4 da better cause of evrything iv been missin 4 yrs.