The stray...

Awakening to the wonder of a lost cause... Feeling the misplacement of comfort climb the walls... As one face after another ain't the one... Knowing the heart is to suffer if it we're to open to a false luv... It seems strange beds cannot capture the ease of home... Going from one luv'r to the next something is missing when not alone... As eyes notice the surroundings one jus does not belong... Sitting in the dark in someone else's linger trying to get along... Self jus wants to leave so the sinking of emotions doesn't reach... To fall short of ever getting in as the hurt is not mine to teach... The fuckin boundary of friends being crossed scared off trust... As lanes weave in a blur merging likes n the expectancy of luv... Only having so much time before the release sends them away... As thy feet get to stepping back with a directional turn to remain sane... Loosening the grip of sleepovers that should have never taken place... But to up n go in the middle of the nights is a cowards escape... As their hands touch the skin that creates anxiety ready to run... Oh the unfortunate twist of having no use in laying flush... For the attachment isn't a desire needed to having someone always around... The clingy restraints claims the freedom of the mind losing its ground... As still as not wanting to awaken what sleeps less than inches from me disappearing for good... N nah, in them i cannot find the joy needed to even look... No depths favor my curiosities to ever take part at sharing life... Jus moments that grow old even though I'm blind... Allowing good ones to land in palms jus to slide through fingers that let them go... Like water if it was to continue tears would flow... So the cutting of strings come sooner than thoughts could ever regain... Once gone it's forever as regrets will remember the fear if being trapped by anger burning flame... Lit in the dark for me to see where i must not be... Unable to sleep here i jus want my own dreams...

confronting truths...

baring truths...
it's such a funny thing...
how does one admit what they hide.?.
as times surface from a place where one is so afraid to breathe...
feeling removed from a norm once known...
trying to figure out thoughts from emotions that conflict...
looking off into the distance...
to the horizon of days where sense is so far fetched...
forced to keep a move on...
hushing unwanted phases so they fade from the mind...
pounding to be reached in the most sensitive moments known...
as the silence finds the dark where the heartbeat resides...
thinking there just isn't any fuckin hope...
cool with living out life with the solitude that confronts the smile...
able to do whatever n whenever one chooses...
tucking the unforgettable temptations up the sleeve to lose along the way...
awaiting the settling of the calm to ease from behind the eyes in an escape claiming truces...
as the blur won't help remember what isn't deserving to walk with one on the deuces thrown...
having self as a copilot to soar from here to there...
landing long enough to catch a feel of where a meal is worth the eating...
with the patience of birds mated in a due process of eliminating unnecessary tares...
giving a chance to honest use playing out...
freeing details into motions to be seen...
when is one to know when it's ok to end the drought.?.
crossing back over to entertain another's willingness to advance further than lonely daydreams...
kept warm behind doors that unlock true intent...
wiggling the tongue to speak from beneath breaths sighing for a change...
leaning in to a bit of belief... 
walking through walls that become transparent from their figurative state...
finally pure...
when the end of trust wraps back around to the reality of opening up...
shaking off the flurries that rippled from the drowning of self...
washed back up on the shores knowing how deep one can swim before goin under the surface of luv...
will confronting truths comprehend for once that life must go on.?.
to regain the balance of the teeter that fell to the weight carried...
reemerging from a loss within where it wasn't someone else that wasn't present for so long...
no longer buried...
ready to be happy again...
allowing arms to close in on the torso with a squeeze...
face to face with the truths applied to gain peace confiding in a friend...
with a chuckle that triggers a smile creating a sound that comes out like hehe...

mindless hearts...

one gets tired of giving everything to others when the want it... start holding it in for self's own mental health... as heartless as it my seem the cycle is vicious to hear how everyone is so much different... yet unable to understand why emotion doesn't come as free as they  throw their own passion around as if they're jus trying to help... n when the comprehension relates to sex is better to allow than desires of feelings jus wanting a friend most shun the thought... thinking to body is the temple though it's the well being of a peaceful place within... living as is becomes a way of life for maturity attracts the real ones able to slow to a pause unlike time so flawed... gaining the true depths of stability so smiles interact with the feel of grins... one comes to retract from societies ways when the determination of happiness is the key... done with the rush of child like crushes demanding to be luv'd or else... damn near presenting a fairy tale before the eyes like reality is to step aside to dreams... those that are taught from a young age of ignorant patterns overly felt... 

fake is the exchange of hearts if it's the initial hope... overstepping boundaries before an honest use can even have a purpose... creating a false sense of what relations is by expecting the lack of compatibility will never leave them alone... triggering side effects affected by the mindsets gone empty due to self righteousness that is nothing more than worthless... one sits after so long willing to live for once... refusing to listen to the same ol bs whether or not any other really is legit... with no harm no foul as the tongue speaks no lie of intent never to blush... claiming the very thing the emotional type want to pluck from ones wits... freedom... needing to capture its essence... having the thrill of having another around so life won't be as lonely as boredom... the force of it all one knows is jus too fuckin intense... to bare the inner makings is put on hold to evolve into the clarity of lips flipping tones... spoke to the point of interactions waiting on the mushy drift of a parasite in the mind's world... with a patience one cannot cater to the gates swinging open exposing thy home... with birds that twirl...

silent thoughts...

what if i wasn't a hard azz but i felt i could use someone like u.?. i'm jus talking but there's some real shit in my words that haven't yet come to... only if u knew what my eyes wanna see in my dreams come out to play... maybe then you'd listen to how i feel of wanting to be that truth expressed upon ur face... i ain't much but i give life what i have to give... loosening to the notion that it won't be to late to let u know my heart wants to live... as there's things i've been hiding from those closest to me... knowing you've been in my sights yet i don't believe i fit the type u seek... maybe the wrong shade or even a thought never taken in my direction... i don't know the terms in which u feel must be to give me a take... looking me over to consider an interest for a bit of affection... being a stranger with jus enough curiosity to create some magic finally awake... if i wasn't on ur list of possibilities how could i enlist.?. to show u what it is ur missing out on... chasing what u feel is nothing more than hands once again balled up in empty fists... as what u do not know is if i was to open up it would be u to receive my luv worn... if it ever were to be... crushing i have been for some time... in the shadows where no one pays attention to sighs needing to breathe... only if i had u in my life...

lacking the comprehension...

what's that in ur eyes.?.  that stare i'm trying to avoid... don't lie... why is it u wanna go beyond the void.?. n why is it i don't believe it will last.?. as if a phase controlling the moment... hoping more than anything to dive into the splash... as hinges swing to doors open... watching me move with a beat created in ur heart... please don't do that thing so many do... rushing the empty to unload emotions upon demands from the get go of the start... as the twist hurts before friends ever bare a truce... head over heals isn't to be comprehended as the flip flop of quicksand...  sinking into sights as a physical attraction... made to believe everything is luv at first sight... getting used to the familiarity of attachments... catering to the linger of uncertain minds... who is it u seek in me.?. wanting to give u some sorta comfort in return... needing passion to accept what thought hasn't been able to confirm as next nominee... as dreams force temptation into believing in worth... where do i fit in between thoughts running around inside ur head.?. unable to understand there's a difference in what ur used to n me... feeling before ever getting to know i luv u when allowance is an art so dead... demanding to be something that should be free... touched by use in a way timeless sighs as a must... what is it u want from me jus trying to live.?. n what is it u know about trust.?. having what kinda melody to vibe hushed at the jibs... who am i to satisfy the crave u seek to be fulfilled.?. a stranger u don't even know... a hidden secret within my own giving those sexual chills... why is it me u think u wanna hold.?.

full circle...

swerving in n outta lanes... crossing lines... boundaries over stepped... limits pushed... trying to figure out what's what... no rhymes needed... catchy phrases having the lack of relevance... attempting to configure a mindset that makes some sort of sense... life... short n sweet in its confusing state... turns develop... patterns create an abandoned way of life... changing... rounding out somewhere else... on the other side... trying not to look back... never to be sucked back in... grips release to the tightening of emotional pain... healing somewhere of in no mans land... thinking of how to correct self... moving to a different beat... loosening to a new phase... becoming the evolution needed... smiles transfer from one thought to the next... looking around at unfamiliar faces...finding comfort in a truce... feeling life move within... wanting to live... accepting how things play out... lost to found...

If i was doin me n craving u...

If my heart didn't wanna fall in luv... Would it be me ur fingers wanted to touch... Knowing u couldn't reach for me through ur best sex..  As i ain't looking to meet any of ur clingy demands hidden in texts... Could u take me for what it is n try n maintain.?. Keeping ur emotions at bay so it's not my sanity that feels restrained... For i only come out to get a taste of the kink u don't let jus anyone dig in to... As friends are able to be what remains so the failing of expectations isn't the obvious removed... If i jus wanted to be as is with whatever comes natural to intent... Where would u fit into jus gettin it in with breaths ready to do more than vent... Grasping as lips suck in air to catch life pouring from pores... Down on knees as the eagle spreads for the release of the depths flowing up upon ur shores... If i wanted nothing to do with passion other than in a sexual sense... Would u feel me penetrating u or slip to the side for my eyes to focus in on putting up ur fence.?. Believing me to be nothing more than a fuck wasted in the wind... A nut unable to land on ur hormones bursting to a different kinda freak breaking free from within... As the one worth so much more than my potential portrays me to be... How would u envision where i'm coming from from a single standpoint living in the comfort of solo dreams.?. Only in need of a lil tlc so time doesn't go without the physical attractions bared to the display in the nude of take me as i am... If i wasn't the same thing u were taught was in the form of a man...

The constructive type...

Have u ever wondered what it's like to have someone know who u are without a hitch.?.
Like, u would like to hear them narrate who u are with an ease that captures sound loosened at the jibs...
As if they were closer than comfort as it felt so fuckin good...
Creating a voice other than ones own to speak when the silence had a new outlook...
Giving self a representative when others tongues roll behind the back...
As face to face they're the same mofo to keep it real enough to maintain a respectable friendship keeping to the facts...
Whether it be right or wrong they see, everything in between is jus that...
Defending n correcting actions n tones all the while of never being afraid to tell it sitting naked in a bath...
Has the thought ever took a stroll behind the eyes n wondered of the feeling of true intent one jus hasn't seen.?.
To be touched in a way depths bare themselves with repeated motions showing character in which their delivery was clean...
No matter if at fault or on some goofy shit simply wanting more...
Having truths to thrive together jus wanting to hold on...
Not once to ever hear words in a demeaning manor where being torn is not an option so use can come from the core...
Does the curiosity ever awaken u tugging on ur hopes of knowing the feel of not having to go o war.?.

it's ok...

who is it u think u are.?. believing ain't no one worth ur heart... all bcuz u have a pour taste in luv'rs... claiming it's a friend u want none the other... treating people like they are too needy due to u keep getting hurt... when u ain't shit yourself other than some empty azz words... with an attitude aimed at interests as if everyone is ur fuckin ex... as the truth to be told u jus miss the kinky sex... knowing who you've been with ain't one the same page as self... no good for ur own yet u hang on to ripples still flowing upon the shores of ur heart causing fear to be felt... jus be honest about how the magic slipped from ur mind... finding yourself turned off by emotional connections for some time... for the attachment ain't something ur willing to deal with jus needing to live for once... rather to have someone actually like u than to hear another through around the carelessness of luv... can u be real so u ain't going to waste moments others don't have to replace.?. or is it u like the attention to make yourself feel good so u play the game of the tease with a heartless smile stretched upon ur face.?. 

At peace...

Jus don't interrupt the piece I've already found... Disturbing it will dismiss the thought of u from unwanted bouts... So swing not at what's presented before u as if I'll allow u to complicate my life... I've come to become content with the silence ok which i hide... It's nice enough to live without the pain relations bestow... There's jus no need in feeling twisted due to over emotionalizing ropes... Bound for the restraint to claim one jus wanting to get along... We'd never get far enough to accept our hearts can't go wrong... As real as words slip into sound I tell u not to be so selfish as to think ur the only one giving in to shine... N I refuse to partake in anything that picks at my piece of mind... Jus be a friend with attachments that fulfill the thrill... N u n i can possibly mingle as truths spill... Rare n raw in true form allowing things to ease on by... There's no rush to feel what comes n goes quicker than smiles can reach for the sky... Pause before ur feelings get in the way... It may help u get closer than any other demanding what is never as free as stating in ones lane... To remember the human within that doesn't wanna be disrupted by another passer-bye gone wrong... Exhaling on the relief of backing off due to the urgency of pain coming on too strong... Don't disappoint yourself n the magician won't disappear  form ur sights... Witness the realness that refuses to fade from my worth n time itself can give a lil to the memory held tight in the middle of the night...

jus past midnight...

the funny ones die once the lights go off seeing shit in the dark... unable to hide is the truth of an empty room closing in on the heart... confused on how the days can disguise emotion the way it does... when nights tend to bring out every lil glitch beneath facial expressions jus bcuz... the clown fades into the shadows where laughter can no longer be heard without sounding eerie asf... as time slows to endure a repeated determination to remember everything of no use as ashes turn up dust... the linger settles jus past every evening once the head touches the pillows ease... as sleep is one thing so hard to come by as the goofball loses a smile to the lack of sleep... dragging the heart down a road of wonders n fear... the mind won't stop spinning long enough to rest its grinding gears... for the humorous one that doesn't show how life has taken its toll is crippled laying in bed... hopes to awaken in a morning where chuckles can show everyone it was jus a dream fed...

zipper lips...

felt... but silent to the hearing of words falling outta the mouth... needing help... wanting more than a reason of attraction to say what the heart feels as use cannot be put into sound... found... it is emotion rising from hidden contents looking to live... but how.?. dreams cannot approach reality of such a beautiful motion without a lil stickiness clinging to the ribs... feeling hope... wrapping itself around my mind so its contents can settle down... taking notes... watching how the curves of a body can deceive intent if deeper depths isn't ready to stand proud... held... n holding on to a friend worth the pieces coming together to form vibes... pulsating to the melt... lighting the passion's wick to find a way to the sweet spot simply living life... hello... whispers never reach the walls surrounding what's not known... as non existent echos... as thoughts ramble of a duet that speaks in silence of everything yet to be shown... wasted... hushed to awaken with desires running through the mind... in a moment fearing the outcome in which is over rated... opening up... slowly easing into sights for a lil bit is a good thing... likes n luv... goin with the involvement to care with the swing... leaning in... feeling the tone of flutters floating in the air as a stranger seeks to evolve... dreaming big... believing in what could be a problem solved...

as i am...

would u remember me if the heat turned into a battle losing composure... if expectations rose to fall at ur feet bcuz i chose to be me instead of a version concocted soon to round out into closure... can i jus do what it is i do prior to judgements drilled into my ear.?. u see, i felt sure things crumble to the touch due to others tugging on tears... feeling a lil to much of an image when it was i that went unseen... forgotten to a silhouette i had no business trying to conduct myself as as time loosened for me to breathe... i'm not anything u can think up to fulfill whatever it is created in my place... avoiding the truths that make me who i it is i am for i only have one face... n i wear it everyday so the one in the mirror knows me more than anyone else... so i ask, if u don't mind collaborating a few things so clarity can unfasten its belt... for a ride is not needed to wind back up at the beginnings once chasing the ends of silly lil demands... in remembrance of the good times weighed down by the chaos of being picked apart by ur very own hands... to replace pieces of me with parts more familiar to u... removing my desire to mingle with someone who doesn't witness my use... are ur eyes closed to the facts that i come as i am.?. will u still want me in the middle of relations where comforts support the wanting need of mmm mmm damn.?.

taught to witness...

falling down n getting back up... taking loss after loss n still ale to remain clutch... having a drive to be able to stand without another blow sweeping away at the knees... gaining all that's been lost with a lil time to find a balance to all the late night dreams... crossing over to where the struggle cannot be hands on... accepting how life changed n luv'd ones are no longer a part of what used to lay on the floor... worth is found in the rise when able to see faces for who they are... redirecting the flow awoken within the heart... as the mind continues to push for a better way... remembering what eyes couldn't see as pain... looking down upon the back reaching for the sky... arched by the heartbeat to lift self back to life... without those who did nothing but talk... slitting their way outta the presence to come forth when the rain stopped for a quiet walk... self defined comes to be what is needed the most... losing faith in hope of others whispering in shadows where they can remain a ghost... the bottom teaches things the top will never understand... when the feet seemed to be stuck in the sinking of quicksand... without a stick thrown to rescue a friend fading fast... one will truly appreciate the learnings of how people can sling others names so fast... as patience in the grind to float on the surface in their minds... dead relations are as official as tongue that spoke of untruths now known as how time unwinds...

Unwanted diversions...

Jus leave me be... I'm not trying to feel ur lonely dreams...  Nor fulfill the space abandoned in ur heart... I jus want to be left alone as i drift with embrassions that form my own scars... Remembering the turn of events that changed my face... I'm okay with who I've become as of late... Sitting in the comfort I have that I had to build all by myself... No I do not want to be felt... I'm fine with emotions that confuse the mind... As ur no different no matter of how u speak of ur so called shine... N I don't care to confide in such passions wanting so much more than I'm willing to give... To feed ur own ego, I'm not interested in treating ur lips... I jus want a moment of silence to live for once ... Without all the constant talk of useless luv... As even being liked is no longer a thing to be thought... Jus go on about ur way so I can remain in a familiar pause... Tempted by the money that drives me to get my own... Or can u not comprehend it's not u that gives me hope... Do I need to lie to get u to move on with ur worth.?. Or is it that being straight forward will perceive intent ending ur attempted turn.?. I ain't in need of a friend for I've found myself... The one I can count on when life could've find any help... So believing in ur briefing is besides the point... I've done heard it all before n would rather feel the void...

Lost...

When everything changes... N nothing is the same... Getting used to something new isn't as fun... Lost behind closed doors listening to the silence hushed... Somehow jus wanting the norm to touch the heart... So the mind can stop bringing up old scars... As yesterday one felt so much more alive... Tendencies await a sign of passion to see if self can come back to life... Aching for some sort of break to snap outta the drifting feel... Giving a sigh a chance to be something real... In the dark boundaries are made n feared to cross... In moments there's a comfort in what some call lost... Broken n even ruined by a redirection of hope... Not knowing where to turn other than inward that creates a solo act state of mind... Forgetting how it feels to live for the smile to shine... When life itself switches course... The sense of the loss of what was sit on the doorstep of depression enforced... Sitting in a lonely room with walls bared... Constantly taring self apart as the belief is no one fuckin cares... As the music is the only comfort that can reach depths dug so far down hands cannot be lent... N the land is a bounce that hurts the face that isn't allowed to vent... N jus sucking it up is essential to keeping everyone else away... Afraid of what could transfer from one to the next... To heal is to climb from the sorrows of a collapsed past needing desperately to stand erect... To overcome the twist that snapped the mind free from restraints holding self back... Driven by an emotional dismemberment that holds limits at the end dangling as if scraps... A feeling of uselessness takes control of what one believes in the mirror as lies... Having to face this world without the one thing that forced the cutting of ties...

luv's submission...

the tenderness of her passion of jus wanting to feel alive is a treat if there ever was one... loosened to the sensitivities of her touch my skin craves her nerve opened to my luv... tempted to tease a source of pleasure before our clothes ever come off... it's her i cannot resist as my heart for her has something so raw... playing out before my eyes capturing the image of life willing to be had... looking at me as if there is no one else to ease thoughts crawling the mind with my sharing her lily pad... set on an emotional guarantee reaching for me no matter the situation coming to light... creating a desires unmatched by what is no longer an option for everything else has lost its hype... n as she leans in to me i soften for her to land... face on my bared chest so nothing is ever in between us in some sort of dreamland... catering to sighs that know we have it to share as luv has broke free from likes... without a doubt there's a trust unmentioned for we've found our type... one that's stop to claim a real thing awaiting a lifetime of trembles felt by fingertips... vibing to our own rhythm as our true intent is tasted upon honest lips... going deeper than nights ever shall allow two to come undone... with bodies exposed n pressed against the purist understanding that the longing is to fulfill words hushed... listening to how the connectivity lingers on a bounce of the walls... it's her that completes the missing pieces within as further we cannot help but to fall...

Crippled within...

Less than what's seen by others is a contradiction within self that defeats morall... Having to fight to believe worth is more than a feeling to live in the now... Never good enough weighs on the mind causing emptiness in the heart... Unable to convince the mind the ache is necessary so life can scrape off the char... Yet what's left is a depth so deep depression hides behind humor trying to fool the one on the mirror... Breaking in places cracks separate use of positive vibes reaching across the distance due to fear... Mentally drifting on thoughts of self isn't much but it's all one has... So the best of the war has battles won n lost struggling to evade a feeling of being so fuckin sad... Swimming in solitude's lonely puddles where fear dwells with its ball n chain... Held beneath the surface so no one can hear the sound of pain... In the feet go as the further down the toes sink by tugs needing more from below... Stripping the realization apart to expose there is no hope... Hidden behind the walls others run into when intent needs a door... There's a simmer of a flame damn near sizzling into smoke somewhere in the core... With jus enough light to shake off the restriction of over coming the end... Confidence barely clings to days wraping silent nights into mornings desperately begging to be self's best friend...

use gone to waste...

when u mean some shit n it goes unheard... as if another cannot witness the intent of worth... the pain hurts in ways words stutter into the air... felt deep enough to cut the heart from the chest so unfair... standing in plain sight so use can find a way... as luv isn't on both ends of hope clinging to expression leaping from the face... though if taken into focus the truth spills into tones... creating a disrespect that ends such a pure moan... transforming the release from a sigh into a grunt... as eyes watch the breaking of emotion like ties restrain depths crushed... n from putting self on the line, life itself is never the same... for where one believed they'd forever be jus changes as they escape... with a turn that speaks of a friendship that never truly existed... not the way lies ripped holes in the mind  in which was assisted... yet not the way thoughts played out when the belief was as good as it gets... wide the fuck open for the kill shot not knowing they were a threat... caught behind lines are the lingering pieces slowly to find their own way out... after losing the one person that gave comfort to what becomes the silence of sound... for the tongue itself was never bitten so luv could thrive... as unwanted as it was the twist becomes defined... careful to reason with temptations expecting self to be so free... purpose counters the switch up when trust fades from the lack of needs... wanting more than a emotional hole filled that always finds the bottom falling out... as they can't listen to how the thumps beat for their presence like wow.!

No true direction...

I don't remember a whole lot bcuz every day seems to be the same... With time that gets behind me... Separating me from what there truly is to gain... Fading with dreams... As the hidden ache I keep I jus want to hush in nights tossed... For being in luv with the solitude keeps intent to shut the fuck up... Alone is the mind drifting in n outta thoughts... I believe I'm running from luv... Finding every reason to force them away... At arms distance due to th comfort is pure physical... Knowing they'll get attached to what lingers beneath gestures upon the face... Wanting in to my personal place where the mindset is aphrodisiacal... For I am a lil different n could care less than to be bothered with a crush... Though i'm good with the way sighs are released into gasps... N It hurts them as I'd like to go deeper then the surface in which they touch... Spinning with the ticks it takes to loosen intent from anything other than sexual desires crossing paths... Scared of the sinking in is I the freak with no one  to spend lusts... I watch the rush in their eyes slowly give up on me hoping they would so go... As the dark calls to the memory of why I let each one of them slide from my fingertips like they weren't worth more then a moment laying flush... N I feel it wrapping around me needing a combo... To look at jus one as the package is intact... Motioning the okay to be felt before who hides within goes to waste... Listening to true lips curve words of how time has a purpose to gain an emotion to create a better past... Yet, I haven't been able to recollect a cause to reach for a friend to taste my name... It's fear that I create when I don't know where my heart is at... Numb until it wants to moan of how I think about giving it something to feel... So I reside in my own way forgetting why people want relations to save the luv jam packed... N I'm curious to know if I need to peel me form myself or if I have not healed... Bcuz it looks as if my clone in the mirror doesn't look at me the same way it used to... There's an emptiness that complicates life... A distance in between the head n the chest as if I'm due... Damn, Am I living a lie.?. Is it I could use another sooner than yesterday that had gotten away from my hands unable to hold on.?. Do I have in in me to admit I'm tired of craving the one thing I've never been able to have.?. I'm convinced I am torn... Put back together with pieces missing taring me into halves... So in tuned with the silence chaos cannot find me... Tucked into a sleeve only to be used as a toy to explore pleasure... As I jus don't wanna be what others demand me to be... Some kinda lost or rare dug up after being buried treasure... I can't recollect the tenderness it took to give me to someone with a smile that eased my days... Maybe I'm jus fighting it a lil to hard... As it's peaceful doin what it is I do when it rains... Having my guard down to hear the thunder pound as the lightning creeps along the sky with drops of water no longer from my eyes doin more than their part...

different...

U ain't her n she ain't u... Nor is she her or her she as this is true... each different with similarities that define ones own... yet to the naked eye there's no telling who's who with what's being shown... as words all seem to sound the same pumped into the ear... stirring up all the nonsense beneath all the cheer... as smiles resemble hope in eyes wanting to witness a common use... ur gonna havta truly show yourself for men are spooked... knowing every woman speaks of how they ain't like others yet are exactly the same... categorizing themselves like u when the tongue slivers of a gain... self righteous in ways mirrors do not see clearly of the person displayed... demanding to be accepted as men are to give into certain childish games... allowing emotion to step to the plate before likes can ever be tasted... most females do not realize luv is a side affect to what matters so wasted... crippled mindsets of gender roles are besides the point where reason should jus get it in... as individuals come from within to simply live... shedding the weight of how society has trained the thoughts to be... yet we as men also know most males play along jus to breathe... to feel ur physical presence cater to egos marking notches on the belt... claiming to be in tuned with what u claim as being felt... as he ain't me nor i him as even others are not his no my friend... i too say i'm different as ur sights seek clarity to blend... noticing tones in words that characterize unique sounds belted out... as even whispers tangle with winds carrying something worth listening to hoping there's something to be found... as u i defend my right to know who in the fuck stands before me wanting in... rambling off at the gums like ur someone special when my heart is held captive... hidden from ur touch until time comes n goes with moments that show a truce... walking from within self into a new light where truths can never be abused...

the fire inside...

they say he never truly let go once his heart gave a fuck... spent so much time alone he wound up not believing in luv...  it's said he felt something that he could never regain... n he jus couldn't remember how to care ever again... the thumping in his chest was as relentless as his mind goin insane... n the battle within came to be his own thorn scared of the flame... sparking passion in his eyes caused fear to create anxiety as he shut the fuck down... feeling the tenderness in the texture of his ticker pound... some ramble on of how there was only one woman that ever captured his all... n losing the touch crippled him in ways life tended to shrink ever so small... like his world was no bigger than the walls in which he lived... unable to consider any house a home without the chuckle in his rib... ripped from his side like her smile torn from his sights... the chattering spoke of a man condemned as defined... a slave to a woman who turned n walked away... knowing he stood for a cause greater than his own as time became his obsessed pain... solitude being the only source of comfort to ease the emptiness left in his depths... as thoughts lingered in a wandering drift of the memory left... people talk of how the clinging destroyed his happiness to ever awaken from a dream... one in which he fell in to that made it hard for him to breathe... so he slept n dreamt of make beliefs jus to came back to the realization of how she was no good for him at all... silently taking on every day with the loosening of hope in understandings with the gain was a flaw... finding the quiet chill the most prized possession he has ever known... tongues roll out words of how in some ways she'll forever wear a throne... held higher than any other to give him a reason never to open back up... though deep down whispers chant when alone of the desire he forced into a hush... rejecting anyone on another level where trust gives in... yet no one ever heard him tell it but it lived in his grin... half staffed n blowing in the wind... staring off into nowhere wondering if the prisoner in the mirror would come to terms with never again to touch her skin... to evade the sensitivity of her lips embedded in a press... as her nakedness was not her flesh bared as her body was fully dressed... unlike her intent in which lied straight faced as he hung his head... as the tale goes he was jus waiting on the perfect time to lay it all to rest... he had to come up with a way to rid himself of a burden carried through emotional suppression... to rise from a lowered place that holds him to his own damned depression... lost n drained of the power to give to any other for as long as his will is to survive... u can hear the whistle jus before a storm if u listen carefully as it moans of how he hides... afraid to replace the purist irrelevance that took him for a ride... so far gone the comprehension of the situation is ok with the conditions of a solo act redefined..

speechless...

the intensity is too far from my grasps to sink in... as thoughts crawl through my mind wanting to live... moving with the shape of ur body in need... knowing the use it would get put to could answer the craves dream... a shame it will be if fingertips never had a chance to touch the flesh... driving sighs to the brink on a gimme of a moment to prove intent caressed... wanting to suck the skin of such a beautiful creature's texture wrapped around a perfect fantasy creating a spark... as eyes attempt connect to be seen in a stand still staring at priceless art... waiting on a come get gesture so hidden interest can reach for the smoothness felt... attracted beyond words is a physical interaction being about as patient as scars healing whelps... having no rush to force the issue as it's not an emotion ripping through the pulse...it be sexual satisfaction ready to pleasure nerves aroused by the sight of the positioning deep within wet walls... stroked until hormones plateau n the tongue has it's turn to taste a forever hunger... having to mute words gone unheard for the instant we collide i'd fall into a plunder... so in tuned with all ur corks free will would beg to do it again n again... being unable to put the beast to rest once alone with the imagery us sweat rolling with gasps speaking daaaaaamn... enjoying the thrill a lil too much to ever leave u be... ribs like lungs would plead to ease up so the linger of a night could be achieved... bringing morning to light to dive back down for one more go around... jus in case it was the one n only time my desire for u was able to hear u moan me a few sounds...

wtf is it.?.

if u gotta fight yourself to luv me, i don't want it... there's no natural affect of ur heart feeling me the way emotion exists... lie to me not jus so u are not alone n i'll respect u more... it's better to spit truths than lead me on down a dead end looking for u to see me walking out the door... u can keep the feels of comfort that cater to having me until what u truly want comes along... leaving me with my throat stuck in a gulp trying to swallow passion gone wrong... keep that shit if ur not triggered by my face turning up ur smile... i have no use for foes plucking at my character to fill a void as if a child... lost n seeking any ol someone that'll do... so as long as u hide honest desires behind ur eyes u can count me outta ur so called dreams on the move... unless real is as smooth as a friend understanding i am human too... yet, if i havta tell u this the feeling doesn't go both ways n u know this to be true... as i ain't like most to give in to shallow lips jus wanting a thrill to last right up to the moment u couldn't stay... with a tone sunk into ur voice that speaks of my name as a burden burnt by ur own flame... calling a truce to settle the score with lies that rolled outta ur pretty lil mouth... save me the time n effort for i know a few details that never make a sound... seen by motion that counters the words spoken in tongues... ripping off fairy tales in my ear so u can be luv'd... i cannot be a part of ur false hopes lookin through me as if i'm not worth anything past the hype... i need a guarantee that hasn't a side agenda tucked up under ur sleeve to one day cause conflictions in my life... hope doesn't like the linger of what should jus be... moving in sync with a partner chosen by the undeniable presence of sighs that breathe... it's a no matter what, i cannot quit u scenario that lives with the ease in the mind... breaking open to give everything no ones ever gotten knowing i have u as my ride or die... n death is the last stop riding it the fuck out... so hop on or get the fuck away from me bcuz i'm about done with all the shenanigans having doubts... see me or rid yourself of me it's ur choice... i ain't willing to hear the same ol noise...

the single life...

passion doesn't come so easily after being truly hurt... the shutting down creates a protection barrier that makes sex lose its worth... knowing attachments can arise from the feel of a luv'r getting off... seems the shying away is safest when alone especially when u cannot go in raw... yet the desire to fuck is a thrill where real adults n act out fetishes n secrets... having a go to for the mingle of sliding skin n sweat penetrating the sleepless... with no commitments as lives are to go on on ones own without the expectations of emotion... making it very clear what type of relations is being maintained when feeling the motion... so breathes can live with the pulsating nerves hormones are made of... able to do whatever the mood needs as fantasies are beloved... tampered with as free will is in the hands of a partner giving a show themselves... though depths never surface when tangled up within ones self... allowing friends to enjoy the pleasures without all the feelings getting in the way... n there's no questions asked other than when the hook up is to take place... freeing restraints from the wrists which is the only tying down to be... behind closed doors there is no limit to what the eyes can see... as the burden of hope of anything more simply doesn't exist... until someone new is needed to fill a void the refresh kinks pressed against wet lips...

time cap...

open for suggestions that make some sort of sense... luv is to be tucked away until emotions sit down so minds can invest... there ain't nothing worse than a pit so empty lusts are the only thing left... after so many words guaranteed a friend is not jus some kinda guest... ears are listening for a tone to sink in to a special place unknown... there's jus no use in luv coming off the ropes... being beat around until the feel losses hope... desperately trying to remember who someone is before it's all on my own... back to the basics where the details come into play... attempting to forget yet another friendly face to fade... the wait is challenging but the interest lingers with the flickering of flames... wanting to be lit by some real shit that desires to be touched by the way the tongue says thy name... as a reasonable mind would enjoy different version of what the wait is patient for... to gain something so rare one couldn't ask for anything more... knowing the game is not in need of who can score... slowly time is coming to terms with who will stand to be usefully explored... known from the inside out as the sacred things are applied to pleasure beneath the sky... as fear steps to the side n admires how two can admit there's nothing to hide... having no reason to ever ask why... luv has settled on the like it takes to confirm what there is to truly gain in the middle of life... peeking up here n there to witness curiosities walking with a strut... as the tenderness hasn't been plucked jus quite right to provoke the rush... for the time capsule honors the guarantee of long term trust... from ashes to ashes, dust being the end of a forever luv...

split second...

forgiving u was a realization that u no longer matter to how i feel... that moment of letting go reshaped depths the transformed  me back to what's really real... n it was a weight lifted knowing actions spoke to the heart that wanted what it knew... the saddest yet best thing ever was me admitting it wasn't u... u weren't the one i longed for as a friend... nor were u ever the beginning of my own end... i self destructed on my own free will to believe in someone who could never enjoy me... n as time loosened up its restraints to what i was accustom to i was able to breathe...  to sigh in a way where without u was the very peace i needed so... so to whisper a lil something into the wind i'll tell it as i'm glad u had to go... as missing u is not even a tone switched up behind closed doors... i gave up some time ago n found me wandering around wanting more... more than u could ever give... better than half azz silliness punching me in the ribs... the split second it took to over come my own mind my heart felt relieved... it knew it needed not be sucked back into the memories playing their tricks unleashed... knowing i have luv'd someone more than i ever luv'd myself... n it helps... i've copped with my flaw n stand on my own... waiting for a comfort to wrap itself around my excited moans... all bcuz i fell into u once upon a time ago in some vague dream... as it's a thank u you'll never hear from my lips that say i no longer silently scream... seeking what i had all this time buried deep within... n i dont ever wanna see u again... for it's not hate but a truth of u truly ain't shit... n i let u fade for my own pleasures to gain grips... as i smile with one thought left when u do come up... whew.!. even though it's on the hush...

Red flags...

I ain't heartless yet, who in the fuck are u.?. Telling me I should give in to ur use... To consider what it is there is of an offering... So the heart can begin its softening... Damn near bold enough to brush what I feel to the side... As if there's no me to object even though this is my life... Speaking of a catering to emotions I do not trust... Almost ready to cross right on over into luv... On high demand for me to open up at will... Do u truly believe friends like a short lived thrill.?. I'm no prize as this I know... It's jus ur approach that loses my interest when u wanna sit upon thrones... Has it ever came to ur attention that jus maybe I enjoy the way things are goin for me.?. Able to do as I please without restraints as I am free... Why is it u must have a need to trap natural gestures for ur own selfish crave.?. Forcing attachments that claim ownership of eventual pain... N I ain't wanting to cut u down to gain an upper hand bcuz I'm wrapped up in a pause... It's jus there's other things than having feelings hurt from expectations lost...  To me it's not attractive to rush the vibe waiting on the pulse moving along... So how come u wanna disrupt my happy lil home.?. Clinging to the thought of having what I'm not looking to give away... Can we please jus stay in our own lanes.?. Get on with what's what n figure out if we can even tolerate each other... In all serious I'd rather hold on to my sanity n jus be luv'rs... Touch a few places starting from the outside... As I work my way in to the treasures that are revealed through time... But u wanna chance strangers in relations at some point becoming disappointed... All due to ur eagerness to want the now of how depths linger to fill a void... Now I'm no one to talk of ur expertise of how ur still single but I have a hunch... N I can prolly guarantee it's bcuz it's the silliness in the way u trust... From start to finish giving mind n body to someone u do not even know... So why would I leap head first into a trap jus bcuz u promise ur different than what others have shown.?. Doin the same ol shit ignoring red flags... Are u really that easy or emotionally desperate bcuz ur lonely n sad.?.