it ain't easy but i'm willing to do it on my own...
i've tried to have someone in my life to get ot where rainbows drapped over pots of gold...
but i sit n wear myself down trying to put back together the neglect of belief in others...
i don't cry no more bcuz i know i got this in time when things see the better of efforts without a luv'r...
work has taken over my life yet i've lived n seen n had enough snatch to last...
it's the emotion i spent that withdrew from the feel of the heart remembering the past...
all or nothing fell to my knees losing it all...
letting go of the one thing i wanted so life could do more than dream of jabbering jaws...
n i see what attracts me as i shy away from the flirting due to i get scared...
i don't need any complications with the time i've given up to repair my gain...
n as nights come n go i tell myself luv may not like who i've become...
having to look after me wanting a like instead of an emotional thought on the run...
i live in a isolated that of mind where it's safe to put the pieces back together again...
as my truths are hidden behind my humor to protect my livelihood jus wanting to put my toes in the sand...
i jus got tired of losing friends to substances that took from me the joy i once had...
i was a stranger to self n it hurt in ways homeless dug deeper than life could ever spit facts...
n all i ever wanted was to awaken to a smile used to discribe what i meant to someone in luv with me...
so fuck it as i spill truths on what has settled within me as i breathe...
i gave up on relations when there was no one around to comfort the loneliness as i had to fight on my own...
feeling the chill in the bed when i move jus reminds me of the way others failed to live up to words that roamed...
as lookin in mirrors corrected the mind as i now hear i should give someone a chance...
but they weren't there when i slept in my vehicles battling to come back to the dance...
giving more than they ever had at any giving point in their own lives...
yet i still feel the need to be touched on the hush of what they may be afraid to find...
i needed a friend n i found me bcuz that's all there was when i opened my eyes every fuckin day...
it changed me as i do not think like others even more as i find it hard to relate...
watching how everyone claims to struggle with a roof over their heads...
judged by even family like i was too far gone to ever surface was the kicker that did the deed...
they should've known better as lips slipped to the weakness in themselves that spoke too soon...
failing to realize all i ever did was believe in luv n it was that one thing that twisted my mood...
fighting through depression with a smile for my kids were the main reason i fought to regain control...
n lookie lookie as i've shed those who's tongues talked of me not having a home...
i tried to have what i see so many enjoy in an other's expressions getting it in...
as it wasn't only me that suffered when i decided to better life n it didn't go as planned...
the backfire took it all as if it wasn't for my three i didn't wanna wake continue to go on...
but look how the tides have washed off the shores so this thing we live can accept a wher it is i'm goin...
to the unknown as empty as as laughter can get others to crack a smile being labeled a woman hater to resembling an azzhole...
as it's all good bcuz what they don't see what it is i had to overcome to see my babies smiles stretch on their faces as happiness couldn't help bur to grow...
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