necessities never get replaced...

They hold your head unground as if they’re standing above. But you see them on the way up as they’re falling into luv. Laughing at confused confessions with disbelief. Just to see them kneeling on emotional knees catering to the side affects of dopamines. On the loose, climbing mountains to slide down the slope. Trying to reach the top you’ve concurred while they keep winding up alone. It’s funny when they feel you can’t breathe. When it’s their own pity they drown in that’s so unique. As being left for dead isn’t so bad after facts remain. The wolves have structure and play in the rain. They believe they were your peek. The most tipity top of what’s the bestest this world has to offer. But there’s always another set of hands that are much much softer. And they catch what’s falling away so it never reattaches itself to self. The real ones lend a lil help. Without the weight of betrayal standing at the edge ever so proud. For lessons learned better the makings within to be seen by rare eyes scanning life. Bcuz they too have been on the bottom side of a solid grounds going rounds with a presence of mind. Worth awakens suddenly when luv uses leverage to hurt a friend. Wanting you to believe you cannot find another like them at remains the end. It’s a delusion forged by insecurities in case of a rebound needed to keep emotions from being alone. They hope you’ll never find home. So their ego can live higher than they could ever reach. It’s best that they leave. It's easy to find a lust to crave for a while. It’s even easier to smile. Knowing that they showed you who they truly were. The mind will eventually wrap around the fast that it was just your turn. Right place, right time. Wrong choice, long lies. Just look up and realize they’re nowhere to be seen. Their halo was a facade, a prop to help you believe they were a need. But necessities never get replaced. And you damn sure cannot wipe happiness off your face…

close one...

She has a lil bit of me in her eyes. Caught a glimpse of me in her peripheral and damn near sighed.. I knew in the moment I was almost what she was waiting to find. And that’s flow of my life. So close and yet never the to wear the shinning armor of the knight. The exception with an expression surfaces somewhere in the middle of the hype. It seems the only thing that craves me is the rhymes of these lines. Detailing the visual of a twinkle so sweet I thought it was mine. For I had caught myself staring with a look in which didn’t lie. Truth be told, damn me if i liked. And so it to be, I touched and felt the enemy sweat betrayal coming to my mind. Slowly losing my position by their  side. As a memory enslaved with pallbearers for the rest of time. For it’s the initial mm that the descending plunges like a knife. Easing its way through the rope that dangles worth into of divide. So define as pride adjusts to the unwanted feelings of coming up short of being the reason why. To why they are consistent without turning to another as if anyone will do for a lil bit before once again becoming blind. To be a ghost in the head for reminiscing is psychotic when the lonely heart is undefined. I saw me looking back at me until the blink corrected the angle of sight. As I saw the reflection of use remove me with a glance to side. It was a close one for sure that almost got me going. As I regained my composure to get back to what It was I as doing...

The shit show...

Even those you’d hope you could trust, you won’t. Pain splits the brain when insane thoughts react with reality screaming, "don’t". Lies are truths when the believer refuses to listen to reason’s use. There’s always proof in time to witness who’s, who. Having to peel pieces of self off as if a scab trying to heal without the comforting other's vibe. It’ll force the eyes to become liquified diving solo in the middle of life. Words will never mend what is broken. People delete precise memories that twist the mental when the emotions has had enough to protect in mid motion. Changed actions of growth can’t be seen by blinded sight. We are egos, we are to them special as we tell ourselves at the ends f no more, that’s fine. Lonely swells hit like tsunamis in an empty heart attempting to adjust to a new stance. Just to feel the tide descend over and over again. When lips never whispered from wisdom’s chant. Everyone loses their next biggest fans. It’s equivalent to being torn into two version within. On the inside there’s disbelief rummaging through facts as the outside bares a grin. In the multiverse of multiple minds that have their own consciousness of self. The only one that holds true is the one operated by no others help. Yet when tweaked it loses focus and mimics behavior patterns of one that cannot maintain. Giving truths to pointing fingers in such, creates the rain. Putting down the gut feelings to step aside to avoid the shit show falling from above. Wondering, was I ever truly luv’d? Let alone liked for my words to be a factor in between the chaos echoing in their heads. Even then it’ll feel as if you’re the walking dead. But whose loss is it when promises were kept? To hold the line tugged on by a strangers wanting to play at best. It's in their no depth deep enough to know better as someone is putting everything on the table for the feast? Why is it so hard to breathe? For recognition to define purpose of why we mingle to begin with. Happiness breaks the ribs. Too much laughter lingers into too much comfort in repeated cycles unseen by the naked eye. Self is the only one who matters in words without the structure of rhymes. As songs are the reminiscing leverage for them to remember who stands on what. And yet, it’s still a wtf. All in the pursuit of wanting others to partake to coexist. They hear flutters in the wind released from blabbering lips. Meaningless relations are just lessons learned until there's no need to continue the shit show. All one wants is to simply go home...

Aware within…

I am one, one is me for I am. But I’ll be damned if I don’t get stirred up when I think about you. For I know luv is a hand off acceptance that’s gives its best version placed on display. And you make me wanna play as my hands has found a better use. As need is for self to be complete in which were whole to begin with. But there’s just something in me that clings to the thrill of a habit in the flesh. I’m in luv with my existence and know the difference in an inner and outer presence. And I havta say, you’ve awakened another dimension deep within the layers of opposing versions reaching for you from my chest. At best I’m happy to be alive to encounter the creation of life. You just intensify my senses in ways I can do without you but I cannot find a reason why I should. As calm as I’ve become to fit into this place we share simultaneously, I must confess I’d enjoy the fragments of yourself you’d be willing to open up. Knowing I’m aware of what truly is here in the mingling bcuz we could. From a far or up close and lingering in this room you trigger my desires wanting to be in the essence of touch. With fingertips to partake in your anatomy so soothing it satisfied the urge to crave more. One feel, one kiss, one encounter with eyes staring face to face. We are momentarily able to perform intent in our truest form for the cosmos to watch. As breathtaking as a smile can be my intellect insists we collide to become our own version of utopia to soothe passions to pour. I wanna provoke you to loosen up. To unravel your design around me. As one, for a brief gesture of fuck yes, to pulsate from within. For nothing lasts forever, not even in dreams. It’s as real as it gets on our separate paths roaming through the open and the illusion of time. So mentally indulge yourself in the pleasure that it itself sees fit with its interaction with me. Take me or leave me is the choice curiosity tinkers with in the mind. Naturally, just breathe…

I sense the tension in your presence...

What did you expect to find even you looked into my eyes? There’s someone and home and I'm at rest. You can’t pound hard enough for me to respond. Yeah, I felt your heart beating as if it were trying to escape your chest. But you didn’t see a sunset staring back. So what was it you thought I was gonna do just bcuz you put your emotions on display? I've already went through me and deciphered what matters to me, and the way it hasta be is I’m not advisable to play along. I’m a sexual interactions if I see fit at best to wanna play. As it seems you haven’t a clue in what you’ve seen in my hazel eyes. Too far in you dove as if they were a baby blue ocean waiting only for you. You should’ve noticed in their design I wasn’t for the okey doke. I own my own worth as I ease with the way I move. I’m happy whether you come around or not. My smile isn't doing its thing bcuz you appeared one random day. Making your way into a night where obscenities came to life. I won’t flatter myself in arrogance so you can realize I’m the monster you cannot tame with an evenings sun rays. When you’re gone, that’s just what it is. Not even an afterthought other than lingering in a memory from time to time. And we all have moments in which we chuckle of a past that belongs to no one in particular.  Don’t lose yourself at my expense for your beauty will voodoo another willing to believe in forevers hype. I sense the tension in your presence. Trust me when I tell you there’s no pain with a clear mind for the conscious is free. We’re all just talking turns. Try a lil something different for once. Maybe then you’ll see me and comprehend why I look at you the way I do. For I see nothing beneath the surface I'd wanna awaken. The man in me is alive and I seek peace in the quiet without a storm to come along. I cannot pretend the faking...

Your way or no way…

In the here down under the sky, in which you look upon me from above. From under your halo I don’t seem to appear to be me, in my own eyes. For judgements that aren’t mine that paint a picture in a different shade claims to know me better than self. Tilted sight rolls on the presence of my absence as it’s ok. Your highness is all knowing and I’m a mere afterthought drifting from the memory you forget. Yeah, it’s me. Fading in my own anticipation that you blindly never regret. It must be nice to cast a banishment as if you know everything when wisdom is spoken to protect you. Trust being broken by a tongue speaking too soon. I guess I wasn’t supposed to expect you to wait to gather truths prior to doing your part to tarring us apart. And that’s when it’s me looking after the contents of my own heart. From a distance for you to learn how to be the ol mighty that hands out the rules. But you fail to mention that I’m no fool. I’ve been where you haven’t been as of yet so I’ll be the peasant drifting until you acknowledge your crown is made up. Just don’t tell yourself I never lead with luv. You’ll believe it like the confusion that’s consumed your thoughts. You’re gonna havta get lost. To remember the feel of familiar not wanting to be right but to protect. And I’ve done my best. So, off you go to move with life. As I redirect energy not taken for granted that weakens my mind…

The correction of the slippage…

When there’s nowhere to go but into the descending from the top. When never making it to the tip that peeks out for an earning prior to not having enough piss to fill the pot. It’s always in the rise where the slippage loses track. Sliding so easily back to when self had risen from a moment before creating laughs. There’s a slope in the middle of the climb that isn’t seen. When resting for a bit to take in the scenic view as the imagination dreams. Just to look up at where the struggle once stood until the falling landed to start all over again. As the turn finally walks away from the fight that isn’t worth the insanity of repeating the same ol bs that life grants. It’s forever a grunt grinding going nowhere fast. As the head never hangs with eyes that refuses to accept the impossible facts. Some things just aren’t a matter that must consume expressions as if failures are real. Those who awaken in the adjustment realize living is more important than sacrificing time for a better deal…

momentary at best...

are you, out there? lost in a wave of hands claiming to wanna lend a generosity. as selfish intent of assumptions consume the mask of intentions infiltrating depths for critical deception claiming to hold down the fort that cannot withstand the outside world breaking the barriers. what? no animosity? no fight to never forgive actions that need held accountable to the choices that do wrong as who appeared is safe from the gestured has gone unpunished. for real? help. say it. tell me you're finished. I've lingering down that road a lil too long. as the softer side retreated for a piece of mind no one else could give. it's been too long, huh? sung songs just ain't hitting the feel of completion to drive the force to truly live? what's up? don't worry, I ain't as proper as my words reflect worth. I'm no more than you wanting to configure a resolution to the chaos presented to the unrecognized pain. Yes, it exists but don't tell if I admit it hurts. I've come to adapt to the realization that all there truly is, is me. as you is you. but damn if I find it irrelevant to enjoy life's ups and downs. are you, reading along? did you find me descending within and away from mindless supervision? losing rhymes in the verbal disconnection of running outta what's considered to be time. wounded and healed by silence and solitude, can you relate? too many questions? ok, I'll make words sound all the same. seems every other line is on repeat so you can follow along. am I wrong? what's your face doing right now? oops, that was another bloop, maybe I shouldn't make a sound. are you, with me? drifting in space to allows moments to pass oh so fast. one day after another as change is needed to let loose before it's all over. onward from a past not worth a fuck. in the now of where am I going into a forbidden forever. ohh how shallow everything has actually become when another isn't the enjoyable factor for the awakening of timeless has already begun. tell me if you're somewhere close. another stranger sneaking up on me from my blindside isn't a temptation I can accept. I'm receding slowly but it feels as if I'm falling beneath the level of comprehension. how is it everyone is only about self? hold on, wait. luv is the most selfish of all. it's seems I'm the opposite of what is considered to me the norm. as like is as invisible as the sun at night. what a life. are you even real? do you exist? to give a lil subtleness to the end approaching rapidly. drastically it rushes through sunsets to obtain what's left. hello! or are you more like me? hidden within. wanting to live. with so much life to give. just reach for a feel in my ribs. the chuckle vibrating my bones is real. shaking the ends of me loose. or is it I'm too far gone? boom. kaboom. I'm cracking and I don't want anyone to see what it is I've tucked away. look away. for me. so I'm not as vulnerable as I seem. as the great solo artist deprived by my own pointless solitude that makes too much sense. people suck. where are you? iv'e been losing ground every single moment since I've become aware of this thing we believe is nothing more than in the now. soon too pass. and then..... 

forgotten when those who encountered us vanish as well. are you there? the difference would comfort the confusion of perishing one at a time. or am I even here long enough to matter? am I fucked in the head? or, am I just supposed to pretend it's all for nothing when we're doomed to ache? in the aftermath of nonexistence, what's any of it matter anyways? we're all just taking turns until someone sticks around long enough for one another to die. are you, mentally losing your shit? your mind? is it ok? wondering where I am? no? it's ok. I don't know who you are either. so anyways.............................

Fitted ball cap

It’s my hat that’s holding my head together. My thinning cap hides my eyes when the head tilts. When the beat doesn’t match the expressions and just wants feel better. I don’t wear snap backs for the havta be fitting to the thought process to eat I’m built. There’s no coming back from the past when the more transformed into the future of me waiting out life to see the sun from under the bill. In the shade is ever I was casted so in the shadows is ever is cool to be. I have something to catch the sweat before it drips into my eyes. So I can witness what’s stands before me. To have a choice in the matters of entanglements attempting to redirect my life. I’m most comfortable when it’s turned backwards bcuz ain’t nothing that’s come my way ever been straight. Not like I have been when they get close enough to the monster wanting to play. So just know if it sounds back sound and the face angles to the floor, I’m avoiding luv.,I just don’t want it no more. Now tell me I’m wrong for hiding my secrets in an ol ball cap that no one’s seen the inside of. All my bs goes into my safe space stitched together with threads. Keeping my truths somewhere outside my head so my piece of mind I can trust. It’s dinette they cannot me read. Worn out thoughts will give a reason to upgrade into a new feel upon the dome. Everything runs a coarse like hole to ventilate stench fumigating from effete I’ve been. Released at its highest point my worries escape to complete the process of my mind being my only home. An had had more purpose than anything that’s ever made me grin…

The return of the cuckoo…

When you wake up one day and the version of you, you wanted to get away from reminds you of who you truly are and it brings you back to life. Bcuz all the smiles and good deeds in the world are outta reach. Bcuz being a better person is over fuckin rated. When that dog wakes back up and everything that hasn’t felt like a norm fades away for the comfort of the fight chases it away. As the calmer side failed to maintain a balance as self needs the shackles removed. No fucks giving flies a set of birds seen in the mirrors image for the memory to chuckle bcuz it doesn’t have to like diddly squat. Needing not to play along for peace when the mind flips the switch to misbehave. The thought lingers, I tried. The smirk moves, who cares. When the old refuses to give in to the subtle bs granted can’t even take. When. It’s past the time of allowing shit. When standing on morals fluctuates when weaving to the bob of flowing with the wind. When the mind finally snaps back into reality and faces aren’t familiar any more. As the growl from within hungers for a lil taste of insanity, wanting to play in pettiness for the game is easy for the win. Even those itty bitty butterflies float in the stomach when the cocoon opens up to release the cuckoo laughing steadily. Warped by life wanting to claim its creation. Knowing it was a genetic mutation instead. When the truths of untold secrets hiding up under the tongue wanna speak. Pour a double shot, tilt the head back and feed whatever energy has provoked the monster wanting nothing more than to be left the fuck alone…

Silly goose…

You don’t havta me anywhere you don’t wanna be. So why are you here touching up on me? I’m confused bcuz nothing in my head believes relations last. And to give you what you want will mean I’ll must definitely hurt you. I’m not looking for luv bcuz it’s not for me. There’s just something about the way it moves that ends up destroying dreams. But, oh how your hands give a comfort to my skin. And I don’t wanna mention how I feel alive again. You can have anyone willing to be everything you’ve ever wanted. So why the consistent demand to enjoy the loveless? Am I just next in line? That’ll leave you talking shit about me past the ends of an us due to you thought we’d wind up like. Even though I can admit it’s nice being felt in for a while. And I do like the shape of your smile. I’m not a monster, I just ain’t into what you trying to hunt down. Somehow you’ve got it in your head that I’m the answer to your now. Bcuz that’s all life is to begin with. The presence of being present to actually live. And I cannot promise you tomorrow here tonight. So why is it that stare you have wanted to convince me that this is more than a hype? I’m not into the pain after the memories I cannot seem to keep. In the aftermath you’ll forget me sooner than you think. As I’m humble enough to know the pattern of emotions you possess. I’ll admit, I’m not like the rest. Be on your way so I’m not the bad guy you’ll claim I am. I’m just one solo artist within this man…

Her halo is all mine…

Twirling her halo around my finger and no, I won’t give it back. God ain’t bad if it ain’t worth the fuck so let her be as I blue out her back. She’s gotta fiend clawing at the surface wanting to be freed. And I’m just too into putting her on her knees. She states out shy to endure the twist of being abused. Get her going and her insides bust loose. The bitch explodes the dirtier the fuck get like it’s her first time realizing who she is. Filthy lil cunt brings joy to my boys as she moves her wrist. Right not left swinging from her chin. Deep down setter the tears build up she craves to please. And I like watching her mascara smear as she tries to breathe. Bad habits are hard to break but I’d rather break her in. Choke her with her halo again and again. There’s nothing like turning Princess out to the darker side. Over here if where she belongs getting fucked for life. My personal lil cum sucking slut. She shots hire her knees tap out when her azz gets plugged. Vibrating to the feel of squealing insane to take it all at once. Jet lips plead, daddy it hurts as I tell her to hush. Devoted to my cock is her passion clinging to the use. She’s my demented lil fantasy the way she moves. Her whorish behavior knows how to drain my balks. Tossed upon the bed after being pinned to the wall. My hand in her panties and waited around her throat. It’s how chrny she gets when I leave her alone she must be dominated to get off there’s no other way. I fuck Herr like I hate her as the moans my name. Tasty lil freak swallows every time. As ripped fishnets are the kink that curved her right. Bad girl gone too far to ever return to who she used to be. She demands to be handled to fulfill her wet dreams. I luv when she’s looking back saying harder daddy give it to me. The deeper the better is the way she speaks. Like a savage that blows my mind. Her halo is all mine. Whether she’s dripping in cum or tied the fuck up. At my mercy she’s obedient to my touch. To the sensation of positive to do what I wish. She enjoys the lingering hormones in between her legs that open with a subtle kiss. Perfect is the submissive wanting to play. And I have many games…

Who’s controlling who.?.

Moonlight, bouncing off the walls to give the room a glow. Lips walking upon the skin to hear softened moans. Smooth to the texture the body moves with use. Capturing the night on the loose. Tied up in linen as the silence creates sound. The crave is real enough to touch with the mouth. Still frames in live sight is such a breathtaking image. The nakedness of willing is exposed as I rise to stand at the bed’s edge. Fingers gently caressing the flesh of a luv’r bound to my intent. Like a feather’s stroke releasing a sigh that needs to vent. Who’s controlling who in a game of submission at its best? Patience, I just Ava take ny time to tease your flesh. Slow. I don’t wanna leave you alone. So, truly you head back as I taste you from head to toe. There’s a pleasure in the way your groped. You enjoy receiving the attention as I insist on being your fiddler. Don’t move as I take a few mental pictures. You on display before my eyes is a reason to believe in wanting more. The desire that lingers between us is with the feeling pulsating in the chest. We’re a passion so alive kinks demand to be used to lay a mess. From your neck to your navel I explore you with ease. It’s strange horse you don’t has ask me to get on my knees. To hover over you prior to me going below to where the sun doesn’t shine. That’s when I bring you to life. Tongue swirling with a twirl as my hand grip you hips. Face down and buried without a chance of air to save be from this mind blowing trip. I’m all in to the flavor you possess as I grin. But who’s controlling who as I pucker for a kiss. Right at the tip of your clit as I suck on it. I can hear you squirming into grind trying to get it. Busy cut me once and I’ll promise not to stop. I might release you and let you get up top. Let loose. Who’s controlling who?

it's just her...

it's the way a tear flows softly down her cheek when she sees something beautiful. it's how the sunset touches her face and makes her smile useful. it's the reflection of everything she lives for wrapped up for the keeping that I notice in her happiness. she's fallen for herself but not too far gone to comprehend a luv that would be missed. it's just the way her expression meet the day. it's nice to witness such a pure display. it's something I wish I was capable of. she's not me for sure bcuz she's more than I ever was. it's the presence of self she cannot hide within. it's her motion that lives that has so much to give. it's the little things I've forgotten along the way. she's better than me even when she's in pain. it's the fire she cannot contain. it's the passion flowing through her veins. it's the correction of how she's changed. she's a gesture in her own that gives thanks. it's how strange she's comfortable around natures gift. it's the way she nibble on her bottom lip. it's breath taking how she interacts with no one around. she's unbothered to be alone bcuz she's been found... 

Dysfunctional facade…

It’s the wonder that sends the mind into the silence. In between the thoughts that linger with verbal violence. Without words to speak on due to damage control. It’s the disruption that creates the emptiness of home. As the tongue refuses to play. Disbelief recreates the face. Pondering why is it happiness must be sacrificed so others can smile as self’s feelings hide. Too far gone in the mental seems to protect the divide. Round after round emotion shuts due to avoid the pain instead of living. And all that’s trapped behind the eyes is how what should be isn’t real enough to admit there needs be some level of forgetting or forgiving. The wandering within goes on to be too long alone. One tends to break down the cycle of the purpose believing in hope. As time is the factor no one can get back. With life itself playing out on the other side of sighs simply squeezing the fuck outta the facts. The mute can never be heard unless the mime puts on a show. Encouraging others to live as the decisions made while change is the reciprocation forcing common sense to betray growth. Strange expressions make familiar faces appear to be odd. Somewhat unrecognizable due to the dysfunctional facade. Where oh where can the head be buried and still breathe to get away from the confusion? The conditions of acceptance is to play the part or stay away from the illusions. For delusional mindsets gather in circles to be the standard of getting along. But fitting in isn’t for everyone with a thought process worth a fuck so it in its own has a worth. As thumbs twirl, giving up on waiting on things to smooth out. There’s no better time to get on getting on than in the precise moment of the now…

Less time, more luv...

Maybe if dog years is how long we have. If growing old came faster than tomorrow's gone to an absent past. Would a friend matter with excitement like forever just occurred every time we come together after a few hours apart? Idk but it should be a lot easier on the heart. Living every seven in the blink of an eye where one year gets away. Maybe a smile could feel worth for once as days are months forcing age upon the face. To know this thing called life isn't something that lasts forever. Is it possible that folks just might slow down a bit before it's whatever. This damn creation running through the veins seems to drag on with so much lost. And yet, it ain't near long enough to enjoy when everyone is pointing out everyone else's flaws. Up the walls are holes fighting off the meaningless moments never made. As all the mindset can round out to say is, fuck the pain. Only if our time has a limit as we'd expire soon. But wait, a dog doesn't have the kinda time we do and still can't wait to be near their person in the room. Are we just outta touch or so blind to the facts that we become strangers to eyes looking away as the head spins?  Something hasta give. The lights aren't gonna be on long enough to see kids grow old. And the dog will be leaving even sooner than the loyalty that lingers with the shivering cold. How is it people take for granted all the lil things a dog hasn't a clue to think of? When we're capable of so much more than turning on and off the magic of luv. Is family in this day and age ok with moving on? Are we different in ways we cannot accept one another's lives being scorned? Being too good for anything isn't a characteristic a dog can comprehend. Let's hear it for man's best friend. Aways there where the world is crashing down or living it up. Not knowing how to be a character within chapters as the story goes in motion just wanting to slow down from the rush. A dog's character is as priceless as life itself. Only if we all felt the same way no matter the situations dealt...

I'll smile when I'm dead...

Stretched into a tare I feel me losing again. The bridge between both sides is burning within. Two pieces of self is at the mercy of those who say they care. Intent is on display as I drip into a puddle down there. Far below the most wicked pain. Here I stand caught in the middle of everything I have to gain. Falling away from me is the life taken from my eyes. Damn me if I’m simply just trying to make it through this life. I’ll smile on my way out for others to see what they’ve caused. It’s always after the fact that real thoughts climb then walls. And this is it. Another dagger lunged to settle deep that didn't even try to miss. I'm in the crossfire as I hold on until there's nothing of me left. As I feel the contents of all the good leaving my chest. It's those closest that forget compassion of what it takes to coexist. Forcing a divide that cuts new wounds released from familiar lips. Acceptance is a breakdown from one angle or the next. And this is what's said to be a life truly blessed. I'm turning inward to find strength so they don't hurt me with their selfish ways. With a wonder of do they even see the torture I'm hiding upon my face. Is the fatigue of reoccurrence of hard times surfacing yet? Or is this what I was made to be treated like the rest. Friendly faces frown and it's not my fault. People are so conceited but aren't as conscious as they claim or there'd be a pause. Before luv is lost or even damaged by trusted hands. I'm somewhere trapped in a bubble that's losing air. I'm afraid to swim. Why can't they figure a way to get along so I too can be as happy as their vibrating ribs. Ooh, that dreadful ache of loneliness is coming back. I don't want it as I fear I cannot dodge its grasp. This situation refuses to fix itself with characters that haven't a consideration for me. And yet I'm the one that listens to issues to smooth out the wrinkles so we can all live the dream. So where do I fit in to the chaos I didn't cause? Do I even need to entertain egos that ignore their own flaws? The destruction from an undeveloped mind that thinks it's figured out the way things ought to be is unreal. When wisdom speaks fluent usefulness that's shunned as if I haven't a few times over already healed. Immaturity runs deeper than arrogance as both are taking turns abusing a pure passion fading fast. This is when moments aren't being made just to go without the comfort of enjoying the emotional use as the memory is soon to look back at an empty past. How many smiles are to be missed due to the unwillingness put out on display? How much disappointment can the heart take prior to how it adapts to being betrayed? I'll smile when I'm dead. It'll be for the best...

What’s good.

I can’t warship the ground you walk on just bcuz you’re walking in it. If you find fairness in someone else’s eyes, I wish you the best. I’m more than mature of my awareness as I do with what I have to give. If you must go, you already have coins to terms mentally to better the contents in your chest. Not just anyone can naturally progress longterm due there’s much to one of another trying to reciprocate the gesture of worth. As it’s the self worth that collides in the middle when it attempts to flow. Eventually a revelation is needed to be able to acknowledge how close two have become without words. In the transition at some point differences stand grounds in between hearts that must interact to exist beyond their growth. By chance the day we run our course as life is pleasant without an us. When the mind sleeps through the nights or even thinks of someone new. It doesn’t mean what was shared wasn’t real enough to admit it was enjoyed to gain access to luv. E we were just capable of stopping a freight train with no tails prior to disaster that cut us loose. That type of descending doesn’t mimic the friendship possessed. Be patient enough to gather your thoughts as you consider who you are. Hates us the easy way out so the feeling of a lose is downplayed and hidden behind a defense. The hardest part about playing it cards is adjusting to the sound of alarms. Warnings alert limits breached as two people mingle to relate as long as possible. It’s finding common grounds that beneficial to both. It’s being neutral in a situation to sway through the obstacles. As there’s more than plenty of reasons to go. Way the options for you sake. Knowing you’re the true one that needs to decide what’s good for you. Have a talk with yourself so you can see your face. You can’t lie if my presence needs to be removed. Honestly tell it as it is. Rough patches test willingness of a greater outcome most don’t reach. Where is it you belong as you live? Take a moment and breathe.

Crossroads…

Dirt dust flowing with the flow of wind blurring sight. Heated breaths stink up sound as a weapon released for the fight. Buried in dry lips is the good forgotten due to time took too long to give reason to the madness. Wasted thoughts rotting the memory is what’s left of the misfortune of unwanted happiness. Stones move figuratively through the air but never crack glass houses where monsters breed. Motions aren’t seen on the backside of a blind spot where friends tend to gather for the feast. Whispers flutter like a birds whistle until everyone knows just one version. Crowds shift as scopes seek foes hiding in the diversion. Scented pillows fade when cleansed of the filth that was once in display. Walls trap minds needing desperately to live outside the box far from the dreams that can’t escape. Concrete bridges don’t burn like the wooden Pinocchios that face fucks life. Showing teeth in a smile etched out so beautifully tastes more venomous lies than a snake can bite. Crossroads rarely have roundabouts for merry go rounds to perform relations shit show. Tide in tide out is every other day of wondering when a floatation device will save a home from before it erodes. Sight blinks as faces change expressions quicker than promises are kept. Trust is a word that’s chewed up and spat out for convenience’s ability to prioritize what matters most in depths. Growth at max capacity is complex in its complicity to outgrow patience waiting for a real use. Ends remind beginnings of the flaws that haven’t been corrected as two fingers wave a truce…

Look at me…

The lower the lights go the more your eyes take shape. I can see the rage in your hormones that race. They’re something I’d luv to trace with my fingertips. To get me even closer to your lips. To taste them in a kiss in the preserve of the dark. That’s where I hear the howling in your heart. The faint breaths that come to life. Where I sync to the creature you try to hide. I enjoy when we collide and I sink into you. I grind to the feel to the way you move. There’s a thirst upon your tongue that invites me in. A sound from within that makes me crave again. I listen to you moan so I know how to play with your sex. You’re what I need as I stuck on your neck. Digging my teeth into your flesh I want a bite. But it’s when I go down is when you tend to excite. Your curves adjust to pleasure to feed my hunger. I bow to be you luv’r. To see you looking down at my nibbling your lip that’s pinched between your teeth. As your head leans back for your lingering eyes to close for it to breathe. I’m the monster you wish to tame. But it’s you I have barred to the flesh begging for an escape. To free you is to be accepted into the daybreak comes back around. You’re such a savage when you tease me with sound. As I’m up for exploring your body with lustful groping that drives you insane. Roll on over, arch your back and take real girth that can be explained. Mmm, it’s how your hips rotate as in sliding in. My hands are free to roam to squeeze a grip. Perfection is a breathtaking awareness we obtain fuckin the way we do. We’re just to damn good at it to not put us to use. With a ooh and a weeee, we give and take. Speaking distasteful fantasies we never say. Not until the sun fades upon the horizon as fur is to begin. Choking a freak like you is a dangerous trigger sought out from within. We’re one in the same as we burn the room without a savage being lit. Fuck me with your eyes and make my dick spit. All over your face, nice and warm. Do me and I’ll do you until the day we mourn…

You’ll find me…

You’ll find me in my playlists going back and forth. Riding it like a coaster on a memory attached to the music wanting more. Lost, I’ll be in tune with myself for it’s the sound within in which I cannot hide. Pulsating to a rhythm my heart understands what’s epic to my life. As there’s no one song that completes me so I’ll forever be listening. Singing, bopping, grooving as I’m whistling. You’ll find me looking for sounds the masses have never heard. Easing my pleasure to be soothed by that one line that intensifies my worth. I’ll be surfing my pulse as the bass drops, as the strings stretch, as the vocals explain me to me smiling from mirror to mirror. From solo acts to ballads to silhouettes and duets, I’m in sync with the melody flowing with occasional tears. Grinding for happier times that’s found an orchestrated masterpiece that defines all and the above. You’ll find me in my mental feeding my heart true luv. It could be the sound of an acoustic or a drum roll so precise. At one with the vibe, give me a 432 hrz to ease my mind. You’ll find me as content as having it all. Just me with a few notes in moment that’s untamed and raw. I’ll be grinding in the grit or floating with something so soft. There’s lyrics on a beat that speak in sweet sympathies that haven’t a flaw. You’ll find me adjusting to reality in the way my head nods. Felt deep enough to relate to a creation that hits the spot. Taking me away for just a lil bit. Its therapeutic to enjoy what makes sense of the coming and going and what’s being missed. You’ll find me, that you will. Descending and flying as I climb chords to touch them for my own thrills. You just havta push play to reach me from the other side. I jus hope you have something special to share that I can add to my sighs…

A line…

Carrying the vengeance of men that women created within. With a line if crossed is the end of inconsistent behavior only boys allow. Standing upright with enough pride to know right from wrong, yes in proud. But not as arrogant as a woman’s ego waiting to scorn a man’s heart willing to do right. Silence is met with a combative mindset out to seek and destroy even the simplest thing as a sigh. The weight of burden to correct our masculinity on the rise isn’t so heavy when it’s worth the cause. The mentality of the real ones gather self to move differently than how a woman tends to wanna orchestrate through tones as she avoids her flaws. There are no words when the shoulder turns about for the back to be exposed. That’s the canvas she does her best work on when her way isn’t a priority to the instinct of a man’s hold. In the dirt there’s a line set for boundaries to mingle if the necessity acquires the need to do a lil more from time to time. When face to face is staying in one’s place to show characters has character worth a fuck that shines. Weighed down and moving forward is free will to survive with or without a female trying to get in. Either way I’ll remain me with a determination to never be controlled for all I wanna do is live. She can have her rules I don’t agree with as I ignore every one of them. It must makes sense to everything I am without emotion’s push and pull that for some reason hasta vent. Zero fucks given on a level of submission bcuz my mother is dead and gone. I grew up and know who it is I am and I like me in my peace sitting at home. In good company with my manhood intact hoping the next one doesn’t wind up just another ex. A woman is for sex, a special kinda thrill and my softer side when it has something to show. I havta do what needs to be done as I don’t mind being bein the bad guy all alone twiddling thoughts of luv. Knowing, if given the option a woman will cross a line to see how far her authority runs. They have more issues than actual moments with them that are fun. I’ll lead my life without a follower if it must be. The truth rolling off my tongue will forever say I’m happier when I’m free. On this side of a line where I belong I’ve seen how solitude is so soothing. Yet I ain’t afraid for a female to come along and move me with a ooo we. Work me loose and be the lightning in my skies that light up my nights. With those squiggly lines I’ll bend but I’ll never break so I’ll never submit to the hype. No matter how deep the thunder pounds in my chest there’s always a darkness to claim the absence. I’m just not the type to be bothered by the sadness. Like all the others that I uphold by being a better version of what we are. To sustain the foundation that’s been cracked and chipped away just wanting to do our part. There’s just ain’t a loss worth giving up on me. A line is what helps me breathe…

On read…

On read. That’s where I sit with the silent thoughts of your mind. Pushed to the side for more important things going on in life. In read. I wait for a response I don’t seen to be worthy of. As I question why I should cater to ask and the above. On read. It’s in my face like a an unfiltered slap putting me in my place. I can hear the distance resting conversion staring at tired name. On read. It’s not been hours but days that creates the wonder of significance lingering about. I find it humorous there’s no reply as if words are actual sound. On read. I’ll leave my exposure with you before I shave myself into being belittled. I’m not one for the inconsistency of being fiddled. On read. I’ve become the pause just in case something for meaningful fell through. My guess is you can’t juggle me in bcuz fit me you have no use. On read. It doesn’t matter that much to me. Delete…

If I ever fell…

What would you do to save me if I ever fell.  Knowing I don’t need you to stand back up for I’ve already been there to dwell. Would it be immediate bcuz you cared enough to be a friend? Or talk the walk as I descend into our end. I’m not looking for a savior to rescue me from myself. I just question your loyalty if I ever fell.

No clout…

If you don’t wanna see me shine, imma drink it anyways. And I don’t care about how your emotions rearrange upon your face. I’m the force that seeks to exist. Avoiding the top, I don’t need to be missed. But if your lips could touch my azz you’d feel the singe correct your words. As weird as you are to worry about me, you cannot be heard. Hate me like fading idols you try to replace with your presence. No matter the stakes for status we’re all mere peasant’s. Mirrored to release depths out into the open. I’m just not as ugly as you, insides turn out for the chokin. Bred for the solitude for I don’t run in packs. Only cowards stir up trouble and then hide behind the trap. Exposed to the crowd I need not play. I’d rather go unnoticed than everyone know my name. People just ain’t that important to try to appease. I’m over here living my best life with an ease. You can’t tare me down nor ever get in. I’m just too much for you to comprehend. Your acceptance means nada to me. I’m someone in which you only wish you could be. At peace with myself like the world doesn’t exist. I don’t need no one to praise me for I tickle my own fuckin ribs. Twisted is me for I am in your train of thought. Different so I oppose the norm buried in your pause. It ain’t even flattering just so you know. I could care less and just want to be left alone…

Who’s playing fair?

Family. Love. Friends. Smiles and smirks. What gives it all worth? Who within the circles of evolving truly want it to work. There’s so much the heart and mind conflicts about that creates the anguish of emotions being hurt. What are attachments if they’re not looking out for the core’s peace that is a need? All is good when egos are fed to a degree of awareness going to extremes. As shoulders turn as if roundabout doors help escape mingling scenes. Making time spent stagnant as decisions alter what may or may not haunt dreams. When elders handing down knowledge of situations are that lessons by living in the now is yesterdays brutal trains Ava writes. Who listens to learn prior to repeating the cycle that was once was harsh as unwanted wisdom for they’d rather have tenderness alone in the mirror? Do minds truly elaborate or is considering advice a thing of fear? Is it talking to relate, to teach, is the voice of reason no one to hear. What individuals in the comfort zone only care about self in which dictates actions not of their own. Who comprehends differences doesn’t havta divide the safe space it tastes to coexist? Do these figments of the imagination believe in a better way when strangers come along to be added to haves upon the familiar list. Share are the lines drawn that affect everyone’s mental stability without one single person being missed? Are we in this together or is it a fairytale of old folk tales that are just stories we’re told as kids? When new faces stroll in and out of the crowd to see who fits the chemistry. Exposing who can’t somehow feel another’s happiness and ego shouldn’t partake in the ritual in which we’re all breathe. Who cares, unless self is all that matters when no one attends to witness anything other than the reflection known as the, me? Claiming to be a part of a special type of scenario of belonging sounds very pretty. But do wet get lost in our owns heads when being ok with lost time? Luv’rs bypass sticking around eventually. Family reproduces their own version once age adds to pressures and pleasures that inevitably lead them astray with their individuality. Were we ever meant to remain close enough to bond beyond acknowledging the existence of self awareness that lacks reality? Just to loop back around later on down the road with a better comprehension that was absent to memories due to excuses of productivity. One life. One motion. One chance. Many worlds colliding. All abandoning roots to seek out self’s relentless quest of defining. To make partnerships within relationships work takes a lil acceptance so everyone can participate before the un-aliving. So why are hearts so demonizing? Parents who are offspring and siblings themselves fade into the shadows if remembrance. When downtime evaluates the right time to think of another as if there give too soon as if we’re selfish. Who has the correct way to be when everyone has their own spin on the resistance? Allowing years to go unnoticed by luv’d one’s trapped in the grips of an imaginary alliance. Who like the complications of division by forcefully tearing others apart? With a verbal assault behind backs as ears absorb the sound it takes to ruin their charm. Who in their right mind holds on to unfortunate events in moments of chapters when it’s the series lived that tells the story of growth in the heart? To overcome without the resentment and belittling those most precious we say don’t want to harm. We’re all gonna do something someone else doesn’t agree with. As we attempt to not repeat expressions rehearsed and released from hateful lips. When it all rotates back to the origins in which can’t be found elsewhere bcuz of its grit. As compadres sometimes are the closest people to what a norm could ever get. They to come but when they go they don’t return. Having the same affect of mates do as they run their course until bridges are burned. They all take their turns. But the concept of two bloodlines merging is the oddest form of unity that lurks. Some try and others step away. Causing questions of reasons of who’s truly who at the end of the day. As if it’s cool to avoid interactions at events and gatherings or whole thing together to save face. Silently betraying the luv shared like it’s a game. What is someone to do when watching the fiasco when the willing become the unwilling? When hope gets damaged due to self righteousness feeding its own tolerance that’s chilling. Cold hands have a shut off switch that cripples the joy simply seeking what fulfilling. Is everyone ok with the solitude being appealing? Who can openly admit they’re not perfect in any sense? And has forgiveness without sides taken so no one feels they’re not a piece of the substance. The essence. The purpose of the sequence…

Only if your ego knew…

How does it feel to gather emotions that escaped a luv’rs the heart? From multiple luv’rs that can’t feel anything bcuz you broke in and stole the charisma of their charm. Is it settling to be desired by strangers that become more friends as you threw them back into the world? Discarding their dreams with a heaving whirl. What is it like to live in someone else’s head that can only see the good you refuse to be? Acting out the script in the middle of the hype of getting to know what it takes to set people free. To own portions of pieces of them you’ve never once truly earned. Do you sit upon your thrown as your feet rests on others that have been hurt and not rude in an imaginary hurst? Did the victim mentality create a version of you that can only be seen when it’s a lil too late? Even if you won’t admit it, that’s being fake. Playing others for gains until your tolerance gets bored. Are you what everyone claims is an attraction whore? With so much unused luv left in table where food was to be eaten. All bcuz self is the most impotent player in the game that can’t be beaten. We all know the first one to speak after a breakup creates the scenario that tarnishes the character of the unspoken. As silent truths are forsaken within the broken. So is it that you’re living in your fairytale due to your conscious cannot relate to how pain feels. Cutting ties in the blink of an eye prior to another loss as you just can’t bare to be real. With the capture of so many cherished moments you’ve taken from memories that somehow linger. How is it that it’s you that points the finger? Were you robbed of your essence and never healed? Instead you adjusted to being deceiving with false promises to seal the deal? How many have you claimed for your personal keep? Do you feel better at night as it helps sleep. Forever wanted by needs you abandoned to dangle in the wind. Question is, do you’re really think you are missed? Who’s dead to who? Only if your ego knew…

Day craving you…

Choked, touched and fucked from the inside out. Tempting the alternate version of suppressed moans to feel the inside of your mouth. Gripped, tossed and slapped. Physically bringing the life hidden behind your eyes to the awakening of hour you too are bad. Tasted, teased and squeezed. To get the flavor trapped beneath the surface to ease the moment of your extremities. Tight, soft and wet. My girth buried in between strokes that dig into your chest. Felt, enjoyed and put to use. Lil miss nasty just needs hands groping your caboose. Sliding, thrusting and penetrating you into a levitation with your legs spread wide. Lovely, beautiful and down right gorgeous to my desires. Naked with a side of friction to ignite my fire. Slut, whore, my lil freak wanting more. Rolling you over to put you in all fours. Mmm, yes and the pleasure is all mine. Acting out the lustful thoughts I have locked up in my mind. Bending, licking, behind you with fallacious from your clit to your azz. Your sweet cream layering my face. Wanting, needing, demanding you not to cum. Not until I shove myself inside you so far you can but to explode as you try to run. Restrained, fucked and properly sexually abused. Grinding to get mine after you’ve made a mess of the bed. This is the type of shit that goes on in my head. Thinking, dreaming, day craving you with such a distasteful intent. Sucking and nibbling on your body so your sighs can vent. Yours, mine, were can claim this painting of heavy breathes with just one smile. I promise you it’ll be worth your while…

I owe myself more…

If my arms are such a bad place to be. If you say I can’t luv you the way you seek. If I’m not enough. It’s ok to go find that special kinda luv. Is it you insist for me to be the version on romance you have in your head? What if I wanted to alter you from your emotional state to ease my own chest? Where the balance between a woman and a man? Or does that question provoke you to retract your hand? Do you witness me as worthless and broken bcuz my masculinity is allowed to thrive? Maybe you’re not the woman I was waiting on if so, so ever do I do when you push me to the side? If I say too much when I eventually speak my mind, will you not be happy? What if I stick to the facts we both should hold accountable so as can continue laughing? My compassion doesn’t need to be worn on my sleeve. So who are you to tell me who to be? As passion has many different aspects that determines what is real. Me personally, I’m not worried about how I feel. Sensitivities aren’t to be exposed bcuz some claim to wanna know another through and through. That train of thought isn’t thinking, it’s a forfeit of one’s own presence calling a truce. You will always havta be more feminine than I could ever pretend to be. If you don’t like who it is I am in my natural essence, leave. I can’t share pieces of my life with you as a silhouette you can walk on like a shadow running from the light that shows me in which way I need to be to coexist with your dreams. I owe myself more than that. So if my mental mentality isn’t appeasing your crave spot a softer type of  man, choose a choose a different path. 

Outta place…

To luv someone who isn’t yours to hold. It’ll have you whispering at live, “let’s go”. Moving solo, alone and looking for home. Trying not to rebuttal against another with so much to give. There’s hope. Then there’s the list. A hand full of oppositions that can never take place. It’s when self actuate gets to know one’s on truths. Waiting to see expressions on the face fade fire selfish sakes. Use becomes more than sexual as character needs proof. No more snakes. There’s bo need in being duped. Mental stability must remain the focal point to the madness created by luv. Witness to accountability being present as motion texts to sons choosing paths. With a hushed tongue of what trust truly means to step through and being the hype of the emotional rush. Fast, relations move like cash going in and outta the pocket as the green backs switch up to take turns in the hand that looses its grasp. But the heart doesn’t havta go numb. Just be patient with the lessons of the facts…

Playing catchup much.?.

How far in the past are you? It seems your hanging on to old feels that ruined your use. what’ll it take to died up the process to catch you up to the now where we’re are. Bcuz back then I can’t take to part of the toe of harm. How much are it attached to the feel of being let down? Out looks as if you’ve lost yourself and have never been found. Of not on me to correct your mindset when you can hurt I and bet on work life. I can’t allow myself to be talked in your mental stability doing time. Your vibe is just off. Your mask wore off. As now I see the pain controlling your thoughts. Leasing y down into your emotions where you’re prisoner afraid to heal from someone else’s flaws. Unless this is the real you that’s come along claiming to have overcome your decisions. Have you even considered that nothing is the same as it was when your heart was sowing up incisions. So why does the pain override every good intent displayed before you? Aren’t you moved? You’re still dangling when you should’ve already let go. It’s time to be grown. Shit happens. Start laughing. Or everything prior to now can be the reason I walk away. This isn’t a game. You cave keep going back and forth and expect me to deliver myself when you cater to what no longer exists. You can keep it alive on it own bcuz that’s not I chose to live. It’s my responsibility to go shopping with the chaos in your head. Clear out your mind Ava empty your chest. Yes, is that fuckin easy. What matters in the presence of you still breathing? Nothing can hurt you here but you’re gonna havta comprehend who’s your true enemy. You have inconsistencies. You don’t be smearing your spoils onto me. Decide who it is you wanna be. Be present out longer in it memories. Your reality is conflicting with you’re dreams. It’s evident that the trauma is keeping you from happiness. I don’t want any doings with the distastefulness. Be respectful and move on or gather yourself in your own accord. Either way this show can’t go on. You’re not y pity party. I owe it to myself for you not to harm me. I don’t want your issues for I have my own  that I’ve dealt with a long time ago. Get with it or leave me alone…

Fuckery at its best…

Right when you think you mean sobering to someone elder looking man at you like no one else has ever done. Boom goes the world you’ve come to know. Every moment wasted on memories that will havta be forgotten. Oh no, it’s as true as the lungs needing air. Suffocation by emotional warfare plaguing the confusion settled into the nerve. What worth? Friend? There’s no such thing. Luv only allows compatibility as long as the heart gets what it wants. And if the mind isn’t in control, kaboom. Eventual demise. Fuckery at its best. Proof that life caters to the contents of the chest. Selfish hopelessness rules the weak. As the mental strong who’ve found the balance are considered to be the freaks. Is when the comfort eases in to reassure the feel to move forward. Surprise mofo, noting every good enough. So bounce. Step to the side as they pass you by. Nothing was ever meant to last. And in today’s world, pfft, just enjoy what you can. There’s no true connection. Only moments that alter tone in a false presence of boredom at times isn’t a bad thing. That’s the resting place of peace most cannot comprehend. Carter not. To live is a must. If the pieces fit do you. Must know the puzzle goes back in the box….

Created in one look…

What look do you have me pegged to? Or, which belief of me do you believe I am so I can fail now? Felt, I’m not on the menu to be the flavor I come with. Tongues loosen to the nibble that bites its way into rebellions frowned upon. Reasons will come to help you break away from my shadow you tried to convert into a silhouette. Don’t blame me. I’m just moving to the feel of life. I can only be a moment to what appears to be endless dreams. Truth is, I don’t get along with the crazy you’ve come to pretend you are. It’s false, it’s a gimmick, you’re just afraid to be you. So delusional you’re unacceptable to the norm that lingers within me bcuz I’m not a simp. How long before you realize I won’t tolerate the silliness you have concocted in the overthought process in between your ears? I’m no one and that’s what I’ll be when the end rotates its way back into reality. Without fear. For I’m not a puppet with your hand up my azz. How much bs is there prior to you accepting all I can be is me? I’m asking now before you break your heart and point fingers in my direction. We both know the world caters to women and my character is what’ll take the blow when you leave. Orchestrated to save yourself from whisper’s rumors exposing you. Who am I before I could’ve ever shown you who it is that you’ve come across. Trust and believe I won’t mind ignoring the unforgivable attempt to force me to adapt to who you’ve alerted me to exist as. It’s not my loss. Nor my issue to consider. Heartless I’m not bcuz it’s the one thing my mind protects. I live in comfort. Loosened to the soothe of riding the flow in my chest. I’m ok on my own for my thoughts are at peace. Gracefully in tune with the key player that leads the way. Favor me this, walk out now. Watch the expression upon my face not change. I’m conditioned to get it without luv even though I know it’s the piece I refuse to give in to. Reasons I have. Stories I just don’t wanna tell. Everyone has their own spin on what they want as they cast their emotional spells. So do tell of the stranger you’re to drive mad. The other version of myself I do not know. Maybe I’ll rebuttal and verbalize you’re not who you said you were. It wouldn’t be the first time the switcheroony smokes at me. Just lay the memory of me in the dirt…

No use…

Drop the needle, drop the mic. Doesn’t matter who’s wrong in the middle when depths come full circle in the middle of the night. The heart knows where it belongs after spending do much fuckin time alone. And all it ever wants is to go home. But where is the structure we’ve been taught it resides? Damn if the mind questions life. Please do me a favor bcuz I truly ask for my nothing in return. But, if you could just show some worth. It’s old asf falling short. Every time I open up I find a rebuttal ends my attempt. Of what will never be known as I refuse to vent. I’m here in the mix of finding the mystery of happiness settling into a comfort with the sigh. Sometimes I just wanna die. It’s useless to open up. Luv isn’t luv when characteristics intervene with what matters in the moment of an us. I’m done. But ssh, keep IT in hush. Maybe I’ve overlooked or haven’t found that ease for my bones to move. Life’s good but it conflicts with how the heart just wants to live loose. Boom! Is just another twist that conflicts with the mood in another stagnant room. Proof that I just can’t get it right. It is it me that opposes the creativity that wants to coexist with a friends that connects with the functions is the mind? Is it a question I need to ask? Or am I in the brink of knowing what truly lasts? Honestly, who gives a fuck? Like over luv. If it can’t be in order of getting along, what’s the use? Who looks forward to the inevitable doom? In ask seriousness who has the time for empty empathy? Or am I somewhat of an endless gen x generation that reasons with truths? I’m confused. Who’s who? Why continue word the restrictions of self gathering concepts that conflict with the heart’s groves? Adapting is overrated and that’s being polite. As a gentleman I wanna be alone to enjoy life. I can’t withstand another’s perspectives I can’t relate to, no matter how hard I try to compassionately wanna comprehend. There’s simply no such thing as a frienf. Just fuck and avoid the intimacy that plagues emotions wanting to end it all. No harm, no fowl. But, I’m in the now. Nothing makes sense all again. I’m not my biggest fan. I’m out to get the false sentence of others gathering yet another version of me tried in mental of their own reality stuck in foreverness of me enslaved to an alternate reality of what’s truly real. And this world wonders why I do not wanna feel. I’m just wanting to be left alone. Lemme hide and burrow in my home. I promise not to come out and play. All ask is, please forget my face.::

You, me and he…

What is it you say when your mouth is breathing hot breaths on his neck? As he’s laid up inside of your mind body and chest. I just wanna know if you’re practicing for when you come back around after getting your kicks. I guess I’ve been done wrong too many times as there’s  a fascination of a cheating friend that’s created a kink I wanna throw some dick. Maybe it’s the thought of you getting off that I wanna watch so bad as you scream his name. As I harden from the burden from the way he penetrates you right in front of me taking notice of the expression in your face. You look at me in my fantasies wanting both of us to turn you out. I’d share you to fulfill both of our twisted needs as I feel you cum on his cock and I explode in your mouth. Simply taking turns is the answer to how one man just isn’t enough. I’d actually enjoy watching you get fucked. Doing all the lil nasty shit right before my eyes so I too can climax while wanting to touch. You can be loyal and still bust as we do what we please with you craving to be treated like lil slut. We’ll bring the whore out to playThat you hide and you can participate just by giving it up. I wasn’t right in the head before we meet so just know it’s OK to wanna fuck. No secrets, no betrayals. Just tell me who you want and you can have your cake as we eat and devour every inch if your anatomy and then take sail. Tongue swimming in your ocean with a fat warm meat stick for you to suck on. Or you can just sit on one of us as the other slides slowly up into your azz to force out the filthy obscenities that verbalize a new found norm. You don’t havta sneak around to get what you desire the most. Your flesh, your shape, your face, I’ll share your beauty to witness your hormones being groped. To see the reaction play out in your body language demanding more. In some deranged way I’ve become accustomed to sharing a luv’r who’s excited to be explored. My past has transformed me into a version of if it feels good just do it. So before you think about someone else savagely taking advantage of you, know I’d stare at you with eye contact as you’d be getting your pussy licked. Two on one to settle the anticipation of opening up to your darkest secrets. And yes, I truly mean this. There’s so reason for you leaving just bcuz you cheated. Lemme hear your heavy breathing. Slide down my shaft and feel him enter your azz. Kiss me while it’s you, me and he making this moment last. Taking turns to please you in ways your orgasms come to life. We never need to fight. Just feel his hands on your hips as I stroke you from underneath. We just wanna hear you beg please as you plead. Don’t stop, harder is what’s on you lips. Say that shit. Get it. Open up and get your fix…

Before finding real luv…

I fear the day someone so fresh and sincere comes along and tries to replace you. They won’t know what they’re doing but oh, no, help me. I’m just some fool still enjoying how my heartbeat was put to use. Only if they knew the level they’d havta go to free my dreams? They’d find you dancing in the middle of my empty mind. I’d be waiting a lifetime for you to come on home. They just might feel there is no hope. But luv isn’t for the weak that clings to every other luv’r claiming it’s real. There’s only one type the heart can’t help but to feel. My secret is you hidden behind my eyes as I can’t see no one else. I can feel their hands on my body as they’re not mine bcuz in my emotions they’re simply not felt. I consider it great times with swingers as we pass each other around. As my reality without you will never commit so I will never havta admit that someone took your place as that send to not be aloud. One pulse, one wave, one life to live. Imma die luv’n you from distance bcuz it’s all I have left to give. No matter my encounters with passerbyers while I make sure of the situation I’m in. I live with the chuckles embedded in my ribs. Smiles come and they fade like lights being turned on and off. Evolving in the aftermath is a phase that has self caught up in a pause. Why it is unconditional as you have free range in my heart I’ll never know. You’re just home. It scares me to think one day you’ll never me in my mind as the whispers go hush. As this is the train of thought before finding real luv. In the here as of this far you stand to be a standard of what soothed me. And if another comes along to replace you, you should’ve been here to free me. To release me from the space between my ears thinking of me heart trying to save itself. As this is that moment I tell myself once again, you weren’t much help. So, if I happen to open back up, the memory of you shall vanish in their presence nonetheless. I’m just in a transition attempting to retrain the emotions huddling in my chest. Figuring out what needs to be kept and what needs to go. If I’m to keep it real ima havta face truths to overcome being alone…

This is not a personal piece. I write situational circumstances and a free range of topics…

Speaking in tongues…

Speaking from a train of thought that reflects in words of repetitive escapes. Wait. Lemme gather a new sound so I can rotate my mind to match the look upon my face. I don’t wands talk outta the side of my neck. Nor make sense to only me making things tense. I’ve evolved but I haven’t shown a thing of what comes next. I guess I live in suspense. From the cuff to live a bit until I get it right. Sighs climb so high. Coming out in the replacement of words as I get lost in time. Unspoken is a usefulness hidden and aimed down a snipers sight. Until the target is acquired that doesn’t consist of resisting the imaginary thrill. I smile bcuz my truths are in the cheesiness of my chills. Just listen to the chuckles rumbling my side. Feel the ripples of laughs that escape through gestures reaching with a silence so defined. But I’m trying to express the echoes in my head that not even you can hear. But if you lean in a lil closer I’ll attempt to whisper them into your ear. Fear me not as I loosen my lips to the pitter patter of soft syllables that aren’t trying to seduce you. From the inside leaking out seeking a different type of use…

Behind your eyes…

I don’t mind spending time behind your eyes. I like doing my part to ghost write your life. Living in the exchange of your face that changes shape. Never to be tamed as I refuse to escape your brains tight process creatively made. To be warm like an ora is such a beautiful norm. Wanting more of me dripping into the pour of your heart so you’re never alone. As calligraphy describes how notes draw me up in your head with the way it’s said for me to move as if we were in the same bed. Using words like wet, chest, best, invest, blessed, breast, nonetheless just a blessing as I rest. I enjoy tempting your imagination to play in ways every thought cannot wait for the nights to be embraced. Giving you reasons to think about the experiences in which I read in daydreams that lead into deep dreams as I breathe you with a wink. For the pulse will slow into an ease to please breaths so subtle free will be defined in your wants craving a the need of me. One day to give life to the reasons of why I’ve become the comfort in your sighs. From left to right as you chase me behind your eyes for if never made you cry. 

How time flies…

I woke up in tomorrow in which made it to today as I was thinking about yesterday when I was motionless and well behaved. Something’s different here in the future of all places to wind up as I’m no longer running from flings and old luv’s clinging to my mind’s memory and I can’t seem to remember the altered story. Once upon a few days ago my face was smeared from a scam ran on my heart’s calling that displayed do not disturb in every expression and in so many irrelevant ways. As crossing the threshold of time warped me so fast I don’t recognize this new version of me unable to see my past tense that didn’t last. I’ve been trying to adjust every since the sun came back around but without my frown the funny clown isn’t laughing the in the same ol way, so what now? It appears the war in my head is over as every battle has scattered with its chatter unable to batter and belittle me with a tongue that can’t be heard bcuz it doesn’t matter. I opened my eyes to a the day chasing the night away so it can’t touch the horizon racing for me to escape all the stagnant pain that drove me insane. Prior to the now dreams mourned overnight and morphed into clarity by the time the daylight made life once again, alright. The fading of the weight in the dark created space to counter gestures that changed as of late. Soon enough came around for me to live a lil more than I did before that’s for sure. As I sigh feeling revived, thinking my my my, how time flies…

Victorious…

I’ll win without disturbing your peace. I’ve learned a few things, like how to breathe with keeping composure instead of coming lose at the seams. I need not get rowdy from an emotional altercation. So when I turn and walk away, know I live through demonstrations. As even my pettiness chuckles in victory bcuz I bypass the bs of going back and forth. If you’re not happy go find where your heart belongs as I walk you out to lock the door. There’s no games worth playing if they don’t involve our genitals being exposed. As there’s no sense in going without sexual desires due to what contributes to the crumbling of a home. I don’t fail nor do I  lose. I’m my own standard and things are what they’ll be until they’re removed. You will never defeat me. I will never fall victim to illusions that have complicated my daydreams. Yapping off at the gums is for impersonators attempting to verbally persuade others. I’m not a mimic of your gimmicks just to be your luv’r. I will outlast you in every way. Either near or from afar is what must be for my sanity to calculate what hearts claim. It doesn’t matter how life tends to go. My smile works even if you decide to leave me alone. You’re here until you’re gone this I know. I’ll enjoy you for as long as your feelings are validated with hope. It’s a win win for me. I do not plead…

claim the end...

Once you’ve bored yourself with me after giving me a watered down version of what you say you have to offer. Moving on to find the next thing that’ll never make you happy as you pounce from this one to that one looking for another luv’r. It’s been nice to have known you. Now shove off and float face down. Goodbyes are forever and like ghosts that don’t exist, there’s no coming back to life. Listen to the way it sounds. Dig your grave and lay with the snuggle of dirt as I cover you with the luv in which you came from. Be as still as the disbelief you’ll cause my expressions trying to redirect luv. Just don’t be afraid to find you someone who didn’t expect you to grow. A sucker to tell you yes, as if you’ll be satisfied with the bitch you’ve created him to be before you leave him alone. It’s in the way of modern women is why men just wanna fuck. Just long enough to be superficial so that the solitude is to comfort the trust. But say it with a smile that you can’t reshape. I'll shit a good smirk that no longer speaks a familiar name. Come, get what you’ve came for so I can pass some time. I like being single in between the bafoonery of fake gestures that mount up to worthlessness that create the obscenities of my life. You’re a plaything as I’m supposed to need hurt when you go away. Although, the only thing that’ll bother me is giving up my freedom until you’re done acting out your game. So, who’s getting played? I’ll have my cock in more than your face. You’ll receive a cheap emotional thrill prior to looking onward to what else is out there. And I won’t care. I’ll fill your void so I can touch you in ways you tell the next fella he’s the best you’ve ever had. I just hope you cum and go fast. So I can get back to doing what I wanna do with myself. No, you’ll never be felt. You’re not the type that knows what it takes to earn a friend. So do what you do and claim the end…

I'm not me...

It’s who I’ve mutated into is why I must go. I’m not me by you as this I know. I have to leave you here with the ghost of me. I don’t like who I’ve become none the less. There’s a version of me that I’ve forgotten how to be. And I’m going back to what makes sense to how this reads. Somewhere, I’m not a stranger in my own reflection . Bcuz it’s me when I’m with you that I forget to mention. So I’m loosening up emotions too get a better feel. So I can accept me for someone who’s real. Alive and in the mood to live. I have more of life to give. To another that isn’t you when they define my luv. I’m giving up on you prior to there's nothing left of me to trust. I need the friend within these writings that cannot hide. I’m tired of doing time in my mind. Going over the possibilities that possess my will to survive. I want to do be me again. And I cannot do that here in the making of a monster with unstable hands. It’s me or it’s you. All I want is to call a truce. So, I can fit the molding of me as I fade from growth or actually bloom into worth. For this place is stagnant as fuck and I feel alone. But it’s the missing person I cannot locate that I've never seen. Due to it was me I halted to please your dreams. I’m not happy. I stopped laughing. I’m not a twisted mystery waiting on a magician's trick to change me. I can’t breathe. I’m suffocating from this person mimicking who I am. Of this imposter I am not a fan. I gotta go. I havta find my flow…

let down...

I can’t even get into my heart, what makes you think it’ll let you in? It doesn’t trust me and you’re a stranger. Imagine the solitude that comforts the texture within. I’ve tried to relate with the feel but I’m on the outside just wanting another chance. I guess averted puts you in the mix of wanting to dance. My emotions are stubborn enough to kill me before I’m to ever open up. That alone should tell you what you’d havta be for me to convince myself that you’re any different than the eventual pain that turns off luv. I’m a man and I hate being tougher than any hands that’s ever touched me but I’m I'm forced to stop. I went too deep and learned a few things about me that have been in the makings of having a use. My mind knows what to do, it’s just my thumper doesn’t need a so called friend to pull the plug on forever prior to it living the proof. If I’m broken in your eyes, I’d suggest you leave me be. There’s no easy way to get you to free me from the shackles in my dreams. I’ll agree with you bcuz my pulse is a flatline to say the least. All I know is how to stand on my own two misguided feet. Call me a let down and shuffle yourself into a new reality without me to somewhere you can get what you're so deserving of. I’ll remain here, moving slowly to the rhythm of my own beat vibing with lusts I can’t trust. But I won’t havta open up my chest as if I have the key. My vibe can’t be felt as I refuse to lead. I will I ever follow another for they’re on their own path. It’s ok though bcuz relations move so fast. One day joy is a serum to dive in to as the next is words that don't know the meaning of hush. As the drowning tears chase away the memory as loose fingers throw up a duece. That’s when the endless cycle returns to unchain the melody lost in between the ribs cage. Creating an expression that can't be faked in which is smeared upon the face...

simultaneously in motions...

No one actually luvs anyone else. They luv the feeling they get when they’re holding another. As thoughts roam freely through the mind, emotion rises to the occasion. Making it easy for free will to do things for another. Things happen and primes move on to express what’s going on within them to someone new. The cycle repeats by claiming luv is shared when in fact no one can truly feel any other creating their own version on desire. There’s not one single individual that isn’t in luv with themself. For there’s multiple types that can help self to ignite a feel of joy. But without the inner makings taking part there’s simply nothing there. Self hasta be aware of the phases we go through on our own. Allowing a fresh start with a stranger to feed the endorphine's hope that it’ll last in an imaginary forever. We’re delusional to save ourselves the pain of being simultaneous creatures. Willing to interact to gain access to a better version of who it is we hide from a world that has no mercy. To luv who we are is to show others we’re capable to treat them as we treat ourselves. Red flags can give indications to leave certain chameleons alone. As we face off within relations attempting to relate with a friend who’s gonna leave one day. When it comes back around, the curtain closes for the world to see. And the mind folds into chapters trying not to forget lost dreams...

To you, I don't exist...

Don’t come to me when I won’t know you’re near enough to touch me. If I cannot awake just know, what I’ve come to accept you as is written in stone. My calling isn’t your excuse to say goodbye one last time. If you’re not here don’t bother with the half hearted bs you hide behind as I lay as still as still can be. Worth doesn’t come after the facts of use that was never shown. We’re not even associates so claiming we were ever friends would be yet another bold face lie. Don’t ever cry for a stranger you didn’t care to know. I won’t be to awake at the wake you need to be absent at. Verbalizing that, my truth is I’m better off knowing you don’t exist. For outta my head you’re finally gone. No more memories, no delusions, no bs. If I’m free don’t appear before the ones I luv. You don’t belong in the same room mourning their loss. Have some fuckin respect for once in your life. You don’t deserve to witness my last moments of what everyone will remember of me. You can’t comfort anyone in my life. And you're regrets don’t matter so live with them as I sleep. I’m not weak I just won’t have the capability to defend myself as you whisper in the crowd. Like the breeze you flow so just fuck off and enjoy out living me. It’ll be a smile I’m sure you’d be proud of. One last laugh at my expense is what I do expect. Do you and leave me alone…

I gained me…

For you to miss out on me is for you to be willing to miss out on me. And you’re not here with me where I rest as you reside over there somewhere living the dream. I often wonder if you’re just a lingerer lost, only allowing strangers to touch you long enough until you relocate. Maybe you’re just a selfish individual who hasn’t found that friend in the mirror missing. Writing the smile on your face so you can live under a spell so devastating. It’s possible I was just a moment shared that was merely a stepping stone to comfort your feet. As your life is for you to spend, in which ever way it gathers its means. I once held you in my grasp that’s listened to the feel of you being gone. As no one as of yet has gotten past the wall that protects the memory of you that’s gone wrong. Missing from this newly founded life is you not missing a single thing about me. If you did, it would be known and there’d be a joy that sets my emotions free. But that’s all in the getting over someone that lied straight faced to a friend in ruins that never had a chance. My brief interruption wasn’t much on an impact for us to continue our dance. I’m just an afterthought to the one my heart couldn’t help but to choose. As it was I that was refused. Belittled and befriended by the ultimate choice of preference that you were in my eyes. And now all I have is time. To wait out this life trying to get you off of my mind somehow. I’m no one to you, I know this to be a factual, although it’s profound. For I’ve watched others come and go in your presence and I can’t help but to be confused. It’s always their fault with the same outcome as your flaws luv to be the recluse. I see you the way you don’t see me prepping what you can’t admit to yourself. I’m the only one that was there to help me, I simply wasn’t felt. If we're the lesson I needed to round out my mind. I learned a lot by entertaining your true intent so I could better comprehend worth’s reason to why. I continuously played the part at least one more time bcuz of who I was, as I was someone no one could get to. It was a must for me to endure the meaning of compassion as my composure had to create a sense of use. I was untouchable until I opened up to a luv’rs smile that had nothing to give in return. But oh, how it hurt. How you gave to me the one thing you didn’t realize you had to share with me other than the way you flirt. Betrayal. It was unveiled. As the old me was unalived. For you were no longer mine. As nowadays I cling to the experience bcuz I came from it a reasonable man. With the knowledge of participation being everything that lasts as long as it can, while it can. I obtained me in the journey of luv awakening the stagnant version of myself that was never asleep at the wheel. I live as I'm alive and I've got me now, with the consideration of another wanting to partake in something to feel. In a sapiosexual way where physical sexually is a plus. Without you shunning me and me willingly to seeing how far you’d take me in a detour as you still insist on a woman is someone to trust…

Halting compatibility…

Drama is like buzzards circling over your head. Looking down, patiently waiting for their time to feast. Wanting communications to be dead so bellies can fill on others demise to say the least. It’s your way or no way on a verbal scale of who can talk louder so the breaths scent of differences is to be attacked. As the volume within conversation never fail to ignite frustration. I’ve done the math and far back and watched you destroy relations within inner circles with infuriation. Irritated by others in their own mindset is a trigger for you as I’m well aware. Being a half a heartbeat left from your pulse being activated in real time only drives a wedge.  Say you care, but deep down you know even the surface of your face changes as you walk good intent to the ledge. I’ve come to witness the realization that you do not possess the skills to coexist through mutual respect. You’re so offended, no matter who speaks of an alternate version of frustrations come about. Tones flip a switch in moments where conversation turns away from twisted content on the tongue of a serpent spitting venom through sound. It’s always a combative issue with you. Halting compatibility as others refuse to get close enough to fully accept the script you have to tell as you to play. As I myself am toeing the line on removing you from my sanity that’s questioning me due time, I entertain the chaos I swore I’d never allow to take place. You can’t relate in times of toxicity showing its azz. As the severity of your own creation is bypassed when your fingers point at others believing you're a lost cause. Your past is still embedded in your every word spoken but you insist you’ve changed to become a better person as you’re honestly trapped in your flaws. No on's perfect. No one is going to go sing with the shockwave after so long if dealing with your kind. It’s not that you ain’t worth it, it’s just your presence interrupts their peace of mind…

self aware...

Luv is final as it will die. But after the fact of moving on as if being reincarnated, what is it you’d wanna remember for life? Or is it, who is it you’d wanna be remembered for? Once you’ve turned and walked outta someone’s need for more. Whispers will follow you as to remind yourself of who you are in the now. So how is it you tend to act in ways in which will make you look back ever so proud? Character isn’t a functional character here in the makings of coexisting. Emotion fades like vanity as both become horrifying in time due to there’s only the entitlements of resisting. Eventually we must face ourselves with a slew of truths gathered along the way. As in the afterlife, where moving on we take with us what we can never escape. Mentally we’re aware of our own dysfunctions of trial and error. But at some point, what we’ve learned hasta be present in how we move before Paul becomes the barer. The good moments will pass to resurface more than a few again and agains that regurgitate goodbyes. So why do we allow what will transform us negatively into a monster telling versions of lies? We’re not virgins who are new to how things can play out. As tongue need not be one sided in the downfall of hope clinging to the beat of the heart pounding so loud. To enjoy whatever comes and goes is repetitively insane. So, is self just waiting on another irreversible ending to place the blame? As to be in between worlds that resemble relations is supposed to be the correction phase so we attract the likeliness of a likeminded individual that’s lived through their own shame. There’s no need in squandering the brief self reflection that creates a better sense of who we claim to be just wanting to avoid the pain. Bad decisions linger from one universe to another. If you can relate, that’s one person’s perception of reality to another’s as we slither simultaneously through spaces void to touch every single and multiple luv’r. Tension exists through distasteful tongues that tell tales of who self only claims to be. Or is it, the truth is everything words penetrate to remain emotionally deep?

The nurturer and the caveman…

Why not be the emotional aspect I try to express? You could be the representation of who I am as the man in me is safe to fight this world away. My softer side can live through you as you’nt havta get beaten down ever again. Be the peace that compliments who it is I need to be. A replica I cannot show for the weakness of a man is measured by his stance confirming leading the way. With someone like you I'd have a confident confidant to watch my back if I’m to need a second wind to acknowledge another angle I may have overlooked. I’ll be the bad guy every time if you’d use your femininity to sooth the feel of you I possess inside. Know that you’d exist in my mind and be the reason I should open up. There’s a gentler version of myself only a certain type will ever witness. For I’m not everyone’s plaything to toss about my secrets and details. Level up to privacy and protection from your own natural intent. Be the woman as I’ll be the simplicity of what a man truly is. Just like me before you, like me bcuz there’s a good chance if you don’t this will never work. That’s when the respect breaks down and a friend mutates into an enemy. And there’s combative egos that I have to deal with daily that I don’t want to entertain as it is. Having another disruption isn’t a desire but a nuisance I simply cannot allow. I’m ok with you enjoying me as I become a safe space for you to evolve. As I make the hard decisions so your feelings don’t cloud your judgement. And if I get a few of them wrong you’re not to blame. For you’ve merely stepped back to coexist for our strengths to be active. You’re a nurturer by design. I’m a caveman gaining wisdom to share. Nothing more, nothing less. These terms if accepted could gain a real friend for life…

Woman vs woman…

Face shots. I know your ego is sore. My blank stare is an idgaf. Creating your gestures of discomforted expressions that shows I’m under your skin. Just by being me I win and I don’t have it in me to play that game. You’re triggered and I figure ours your issue displayed across your face. As the silly side of me wonders what you’d do if I were to whip my around in your direction real fast. To see if I can get you to jump off the ledge in your mind. Bcuz hope you’re looking at me confirms I bother you. So for the giggles let’s say I give a lil tudage when I look you up and down. Are you just wanting to hate me from a far? Or is it, there’s jitters beneath the surface that you wanna get off your chest? Mood swings. Are you feeling a certain type of way? Dies my presence infuriate your mindset. Bringing hate along for the ride of emotional distortions. Why are you glitching? Becoming a different version of who you were before I walked in the room. Is your silence that gives you away. The reflection of e in your eyes not entertaining your childish behavior. The only reason I noticed you was bcuz I needed to bypass you. I don’t even know you. Haven’t even thought about it. Your demeanor is just off. It’s a violation of the moment we crossed. Bitter sweet. You’re ugly and I’m living it up. Complications of my best life AB’s the worst response. I wouldn’t wanna live inside of you. To be trapped behind that mug is prolly why that smear on you wear is worn upside down. I’m not that important to you in the way I could care less to even sigh on your behalf. Girl please. Go find a sunset to be mad at…

Stepping…

I ain’t moving. Stepping to the side isn’t an option and I’m not the type to be drooling. But I dare you to turn away. Bcuz life with or without you will be popping as I get on with my day. Bring me struggles or attempt to drag me down. If you’re willing to tempt me to hold you accountable I won’t frown. Do your thing and watch me live. You or no one else will ever be more than life can give. We can enjoy it together and find us. Turn likes into the possibilities of luv. But I ain’t half stepping myself to pease your insecurities acting out in verbal violence. Be a woman in your own way and this thing we do can speak in silence. I’ll tell you once on what it’ll take and that’s ask the details you’ll ever need. It’s on you from then on to be my peace. Otherwise, the first time you overstep your space I’ll step over you getting to going where I intent to end my days. I’m not hung up on emotions when I have an existence craving everything from the mountains to the oceans waves. Who’s with me matters to a point but anyone who comprehends the truth of use will do. If no one wants to be and let be I’ll drift on the planes as I move. Being alive ain’t shit to me. I’m comforted by the ease that comes with the pleasure of doing what I want. So don’t get you hooks into me for I can’t be caught by vanities crush. As wherever can be home at any given moment to sit for a while. Trust me when I tell you, I don’t need to to smile. I’ve been doing it on my own for as long as I’ve been alive. But if you wads calm down and breathe I have the time. We’re here and the mood fits the scenario for the scenery to fill the void to relax for a few. But I ain’t afraid to speak on inconsistencies that I havta waste a breath on as if you’re new. I ain’t down playing you, I’m just gonna be honest from the get go of anything ever transforming from strangers crossing paths. Bcuz one day we too will pass. Until then imma be real with myself. I’m the only one who feels what I feel so it’s me that’s the only one I seek help. You’re just an additive to make life more of a soothe. So live loose. Stepping could be a good thing or a final page. I know who I’ll be to you with the expressions upon your face. Words need not demands but whispers flowing so easily are a must. If it ain’t natural I don’t want your type of luv…

Realizing worth…

What of the moment I realize I couldn’t hate you even if I tried? Would you cry for me in my honesty created by simply loving living life? If you were the happiness added to my own accord moving with the breeze. Could you see me witnessing you without being on my knees? I’m accountable bcuz I’m the only one I cannot cut out of my mind in which is where you live regardless if you stay or not. If there was no softer side of me without you would you believe there’s no altered reality for me to make my thoughts stop. As you linger in my head on and endless quest to ease the way I feel. How would you respond if I told you this is real? But I havta remain me. Without the lies that you’re forever as we adjust to truths of ghosts of dreams. False hopes aren’t a part of the usefulness of your touch. And it’ll take me some time to even dip my toes into luv. No matter how deep you wanna dig into my chest. It’s easier to ride a mentality to relate to interests to invest. So we ain’t regretting a loss and referring to a past lost. Bcuz we forgot to pause. Help yourself feel what you can’t hide. I’ll be the witness to how we play out in the middle of life. Slowly floating down the pulse and eager to ease into the heart. Let’s just say, I know my part. You don’t havta remind me of my intent at any giving point to reassure yourself. If you see me, accept you’re more emotional than I am but I can be felt. I do feel only what I can as you do. We’re never gonna be on the same wave at the same exact time so. If you knew of the words I don’t speak of. Would you see through me and realize it’s not just some lust. For who you are to me is for me to know. As I’m who you’re gonna imaging me as someone you hold. If you’re a come and go I’ll be sitting with the memory until I adjust. The realist shit is moving targets eventually take an arrow and fall for luv. To hear names softened to intensify intent. So what if I come to a crossroads where we normalize our scents? Could you, would you, should you, believe I’d be content to walking with you? Until you’ve alerted my mind in which you’ve entered to work loose. If I admitted you’re behind my eyes doing things I didn’t was imagine again. If I just wanted to be a man. Of the response I wonder. Bcuz from the threshold of the next level everything changes. And comforts fades into the hands of a luv’r holding on for how long? In the beginning I never thought of the end until I realized I cannot go wrong. But what if I am? Who’s gonna hurt more after we land? Imma go my way and you’ll find another to fill your days. That’s the way it goes so who’s truly claimed? It’s then when remembering slowly becomes vague. But the remains of an us will remind us from time to time of a face. Trapped in age is someone from days to years ago. But what if I’m not afraid to live through the many different types of moans and groans? Taking a chance to better life. Getting past the mental illusions of the early hype. If you were a friend what would I miss out on if I said nothing at all? When your voice could be, would be, should be, ricocheting off the walls. In my truths I teeter on an us. Upright and laying flush. But if you knew these details of my pulse that crawls through me when you’re near. You’d know I’m at the doorstep inviting you in without fear…