I pretend there's someone next to me. I don't feel alone with an imaginative dream. A friend that doesn't like to get involved with the world. I make believe I have a girl. I don't know what she looks like n I don't even know her name. But the comfort of believing she's near brings a smile to my face. N I may be going for a loop on the coocoo train but I'm content. She doesn't twist my emotions against me nor care of other men. I created her outta thin air as she doesn't really exist. As her absence tickles my ribs. I think she's here n I sleep all night. N when I awake she's just at work so I get on with life. It's a creepy way to hide behind locked doors. Even worse that my heart has much to give n then more. As I tell myself there's no place like home. Knowing damn well I lost all purpose of hope. So I made up a twisted reality that calms my nerves. As I lay in bed beside no one but a thought losing my worth. But oh how the ache has left me be. I have a false presence that sets me free. A silent mute that never talks a peep. A shadow in the dark that vanishes when my eyes take a peek. I'm disturbed in a soothing way that helps me drift. I just wish at some point I could feel my lips being kissed. Or an arm that's slung over my body for the pleasure itself holding on. But here I am in a strange odd sense of a weird azz norm. Fighting myself by replacing a touch with a breeze cast upon the flesh from a fan. Conditioned to die alone I daydream bcuz I can. Bcuz she can be whoever she wants n I don't mind. Even though I don't know the feel of her inner thighs. With a leg cocked over mine as we fade to black. But I can roll over n trick myself with she's asleep behind my back. N I don't feel so lost in a world I don't fit into when I become the ease. Going under to bring to life my imaginations treat...
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