I'm not the one

my mind doesn't leave realities sighs.
dreams r blackened behind these hazel eyes.
maintained I know the cost of luv.
for it touched me n bounced the fuck off.
u couldn't dig deep enough on the journey hummin nah, nah nah nah nah, nah.
my smile freezes like my frown weezes ha.
never scared to be what ur afraid to admit.
this piece of for my truths as self is the fix.
I'm as real to me as I am to u as if u were my reflection.
rare n the same beneath the surface as I am in my intentions.
I've always been me as the man in the mirror can not lie.
face to face with my image that could never hide.
in a true state of mind absorbin the only thing I'll ever be.
as wells dried once drippin the color of blood freed.
there's no comin back to the world in which u live.
I'm different n in a way u all tickle my rib.
twisted inside I am the rearrangement u fear.
a fragment in time cut loose by evaporated tears.
in my depths I rip into the consistency that forms my frame.
in me n me alone I take the blame as I hear the tone of my own fuckin name.
spoken in my voice to remind me of the betrayal of countin on anyone else.
I'm callin me out daily cuz its me I felt.
slippin under surveillance followin my shadows silhouette.
what else would I be if u were to guess?
I'm not the one mentally tamed by repeated actions unclaimed by my worth.
yet these letters will go unheard as plucked out words.
chosen to shed light on the facts that exist between u n I.
as I find a chuckle in this thing u called life.
pledgin my alliance to the only one that's had my back from get go.
wishin I could put this shit in a funky flow.
so thumbs down to those that deserve two flyin birds.
lost in societies stage tryin to be more than what lurks.
one the other side of the curtains in which u rehearse.
lil do u know ur symptoms r gettin worse.
performin is a play directed to entertain those jus like u.
this is y I went solo n became a ghost to the undergrounds proof.
of the realism untold that can not be taught.
n I'm the the one that is said to be insane n so fuckin lost!
baffled, I'll be me goin outta the inside of my mind from the outside in.
as I keep my proud yet not so arrogant grin...