leavin a friend lost in empty dreams...

words reach for my throat... how could i ever taste whats been choked?.. seems honesty should jus fade behind the eyes... deep beyond the light where the pitch of night hides... makin luv to my mind on what we were suppose to be... yet lost faded back into a life where it only pretends to be a dream.. guess the magic found a way to finally disappear... oh the way breathing was eased cling to what was so fuckin near... livin in a daze of days that lay motionless inside... stirred on the thought of time sneeakin on by... bared n opened was taken for granted witness to the pain.. down the ol familiar road where the roam stayed.. makin it through i could never pull hard enough...  n nothin remained the same as touch eventually lost its crutch... friends vanished in the line of sight to a way of life... as the only thing left is what plays out in my overworked mind... the fame that reminises lingers in between the luv that lived that never had a chance that kept its distance... as real as felt it was captured by a substance that took the image.. the beauty seen fell beneath a crippled truth damaged by lies... as the hate built in the struggle of the fights that did all good in... aimed in the direction of tryin to help hands that were helpless sheddin weight from limbs... jus to leave without knowin how it be if the chaos woulda stopped.. thinkin the drain dripped its last drop... givin all for a moment to save an apology from wakin up alone... n turnin around is a breathe saved that drags the space in the head too far from home... holdin on to the release affected by a good one controlled by the needles rush.. what was i to do when the collapse landed beneath my feet flush?.. but retreat knowin paths must part so u can find ur way.. n thats a feelin that lives as i know u are afraid... gone n reflectin back on who it is i am to u... emotionally doomed... spiralin outta control on ya own battlin life as solo as the ache... as a sorry could never replace the void as the rock that fled from the games... n if u die before u reclaim ur life id carry ur smile til i go... jus so someone in this world remembers u as u were alive without the dope that moans... goodbye shelby... i hope u can wake up from that empty dream...