One outta four...

Two ways to know what will come of the four possibilities. To decide to live beyond the meeting of another in true form. With having a lifelong partner of another face placed in the memories. Without is to determine the mistake of the release or the sigh of relief to calm the norm. To choose is to chance who will accompany thy side. Having a divinities impact of free will to live n let live. As the mind rummages through thoughts of what to do with the find. Weighing the keep of a person or to allow the hand to so easy let loose of the grip never to be missed. In a moments notice to add them as a sigh or bypass the hype. It could hurt either way. Or the gamble will give more than the smile can hold. Pondering with the teeter as the head tilts with fate. Maybe they'll jus be a vague shadow barely remembered without a vote. Possibly another lesson learned that needs more be. One outta four hasta take place. Making up the mind is being awakened to the situation that's vital to living free. all in the act of determining who it'll be to taste the daily feel of thy name...

Waking up...

Mentally blinded by the heart. Losing to gain everything is a focus so chard. Overlooking the good along the way. Eyes close to imagine a better life in which to escape. Shedding the pain n replaced with a greater need. Forgetting what it takes to simply breathe. As further the distance is a necessity from the fall. Looking up for so long keeps sight from witnessing the now waiting to be paused. Driven into a sacrifice that heals the break. Time spent is a blink until a redefining day. To stand in place missing out on the feeling of being alive. Caught up in the come up as living is put aside. Realizing how good self truly has it just by doing outside the box. To enjoy the contents within somehow unlock. Creating a clarity of yrs gone that were never cherished by playing it safe. As the mirror stares back with a more recognizable expression upon the face. Comprehending what was lost in depths. Wanting the excitement of what is to come next. With a sense of happiness that's finally found the chuckle again. Thinking of how they toes really like the warmth of sand...

Intensifying the meaning to live...

The screen savor type. As eyes looking at a phone get stuck in the middle of life. Staring at a face that creates the difference. Knowing why it never was anyone else bcuz of the precise deliverance. Being the definitive reason why the heart is willing. More than a face ever so thrilling. With one button the beauty appears. From a selected picture on display as sighs cheer. As lovely as the inner makings can be wittiness upon the flesh. Thumps come to life from deep within the center of the chest. Amazed with a sight that pulls self into the feel. What's seen is the depths of what is real. Caught in an expression made for the stars above. There's a unique gesture of acceptance in a smile that speaks with luv. N the attraction itself is a crave in its own. Wondering throughout the day of is the thought mutually imagining moans. Only if the touch could caress the skin. The soothe in it could give more to life n intensify the meaning to live. Oh the rush of such an attachment that satisfies the need. Thinking to self that it would be nice to watch the image breathe. To notice it move in its must natural ways. It's crazy how a photo temps the tongue to want a taste...

Oohs n ahhs...

One, two, three, I got outta five stars on my cock. All due to the lack of emotion but fuck it, I don't mind busting in a sock. I'm lying bcuz I've never had a complaint. I'm just running from the feel of emotions always dripping on everyone they meet. Fuck it. From the taint I ain't no saint. I'm just a fuck with the thrill attached with cling to a truce. A feel of oohs n ahhs getting what hormones seek. One, two, three strokes in n everything changes. I become the missing link known as the dream. Without arrogance stepping to the plate. What I do is different than the typical touch. Fuck feelings when the heat of passion rips loose. There's no talk of luv. One, two three nights straight n imma do whatever creativity can become. Having a 9 outta 10 most of my life. But I'm no one to be telling a tale of lustful thoughts. There's just things weighing on my mind. Being a sexual thing pussy wants to slide down. The family curse blinds eyes to who I am. Damn the story that isn't seen. There's just judgements of conceited beliefs of such a simply man. Hung a lil lower than the average male. Thicker than some wrists twisting me off. N the wonder of some can't understand where I go mentally. Truth being, I'm emotionally lost. Never knowing a true friend. Watching eyes open to the sight of the monster growing to bust a nut. But that's the angle they take to get ever so close. Bypassing like n even luv going straight to the satisfaction of lusts. But I don't mind much bcuz it's just the way it is. I'm dominate n crave submissives from time to time. As I'm unable to believe intent for the way they go about reaching for me. I just wait for the moment they're left in a past time...

Priceless...

The wonder of how many others live in a different world. Tucked behind their eyes were they come to life. As thoughts take then away from the confusion here. Knowing they ain't live the masses n hide from the hype. If they exist, where oh where are they now? Going unseen for they don't care to interact. Damn I bet it but the loneliness is a bit much to counteract. Having to deal with the same ol shit if self wants to come out n mingle with others. Finding nothing more than useless intensifies in the changing of luv'rs. As the curiosity creates a question of, do they think of someone like me? Knowing we could have some fun being who we are just living the dream. With weird friends that have a normalcy that comforts the laugh. The mind drifts of the whereabouts as photos are never being captured....

I want worth...

I'm in need of a double shot of something I ain't never had. But it ain't no drink so you do the math. Taking in consideration that I wanna taste something real. A smooth comfort of a deeper type of feel. I'm craving a temptation that drips from the eyes. A pure sense of security curled up to life. With no end to how touch is more than a fingers stroke. I believe there's no place like home. N to go there is like a dream that drifts in thoughts. Allowing me to briefly ease into a pause. I could use a friend who related to who I am. Someone who doesn't look at me like I'm anything less of damn. Without the tap that leaks with a heartache awaiting my return. I want worth. Having more meaning in eyes that never lost sight. I can't find it in the bottom of a bottle deep into a hollow night. N a bar ain't the calling I seek. There's more to the heart that clings to sharing what's free.

Live with me...

Let's go see some shit. Plan a get away n live like we're kids. Somewhere no one knows where we are. Not that they matter but I'm just saying, bring you heart. Wet can find places that will remember for all time. Escaping into the wold world of the unknowns hype. Creating a friendship that lingers off to here n there. Living loose n enjoying a lil of life as smiles we ware. Tell me yes n show what you got. I'm not scared to live as I won't stop. It'll be us coming undone so fuckin free. N when we get there, dreams will become reality. Pieced together one at a time. On the outside of everyday life. There's a calling I wanna share with only you. The freedom of the thought would be so nice to see us put to use. Far from the pulse of the typical thump. Run with me n rest only when we fall to the rush. As nights have no reason to hold back. Just for mornings to rise after a well deserved nap. There's mountains awaiting. Oceans ever so breathtaking. We have a chance to witness it personally. Trust me when I say my intent is reaching for you harmlessly. Our journey ain't gonna wait for the memory to capture who we are. Come along n take part. There's many things to do as the universe strings what we become. Maybe even find somewhere else to reside as laughter speaks of trusts. It could be a spot in a city we've never been. Or a small town taking pics of what it has to give. It doesn't matter what we do. From the sky to beneath the waters edge we can move. Getting to know the highways that take us on an escapade. All I wish is to hear your say my name. As simply as the thought that comes up with new ideas lead the way. Take a chance n believe in what's being the gates...

I see you...

Stilettos n a pair of ripped jeans with a cute lil shirt. Yeah that shits hot but have you ever just slipped into a tee n some jogging pants n laid back in a set of arms to find some worth? Even your favorite dress looks good on you when you feel the need. But I'd havta agree with myself when I say, "you'd look so much better in a sundress n a pair of flip flops on your pretty feet. N then booty shorts you water when your home alone I bet would bea sight to see for sure. But you being naked on me would be something dreams could touch on a caress wanting so much more. I can only imagine how you feel when you get your hair done. But that point tail has me drifting in thoughts of the girl next door in you n I'm damn near wanting to temp you to luv. I simply like your presence as you can pull off any outfit you want if you choose But it's not the clothes that's captured my curiosity staring at something deeper as you move. As from over there my eyes just cannot get enough. But if you bare feet were on my lap if give you something to trust...

Change changing changes...

Am I not worth the stay? Without the pity to do so, am I enough? I listen to the way you've been saying my name. It's changed as I can hear your thoughts falling from luv. I've noticed since time ago but wanted to see if you'd come back. Nights Steve the same with space driving a wedge. N I wonder what I did to change your mind before I become a part of your past. Having you around is a pleasure but lately I'm not sure if we're sitting on the edge. I see the way your body language is not reaching for me the way you used to. Am I to just go with it or let you go. My heart's already invested n pulling away ain't gonna a delight to cut you loose. I want you in my life but not if I havta feel alone. Where'd you go in the mental storage in between your ears? N how long have you been drifting into another world? If I ain't it it's ok to relieve you fear. I'd rather you do you than keep goin on with wasted time pretending to be my girl. Everything changes n we could only hope at first that is for a lifetime of fun. As it's rare anymore for two people to remain in the same page. This is your out so there's no hard feelings from words losing trust. Just put the friendship on the line either way you decide your path  We're grown n I'm capable of a lil pain if you wanna do your own thing. We've always said we'd need upfront n honest. I have a crave to be with coming to live off dreams. N I'm not just being modest. Treat as you'd expect another to do. With a lil respect to redirect your intent. Just tell it as if your mind eases so you can find home. Am I not your go to?

The cross over...

It's the fact that, once you gain the peace within your own freedoms. Gaining access to a drama free life. The ability to see emotion becomes a thought process bcuz the feel in its own is toxic. It's difficult to set self aside for a potential friend on another level bcuz of the possibility of trading the silence for the chaos all over again. Once you've truly found yourself as needs n wants separate. Real maturity leads the way so that self is what's seen as a whole before ever considering relations with anyone. Sometimes beyond alone is one of the most beautiful things to take place in your life. There's no doing what you don't wanna do. You can take to whoever you want without someone's jealous azz comments spitting venom. The sense of living is just different when it's just self that will never turn on you. It gets to the point of being called names, as broken n monster a are couple when others cannot get what they want.  N it's not selfish. Nor wrong to hold out n feel people out of you're to allow someone into your life. Not everyone has crossed over to live in reason. Outta harms way where that sigh is wish the mind clear understanding of what it takes to be as is. Being just one person trying to hide from the circus of repetitive malarkey. Once you've fallen in luv with the calm, you witness self in a new way that your actually like you. Unfazed by others there's a lack of give a fuck blanketed by humor. Hiding a deeper protrude that not just anyone is gonna get to play with. N even though the solo act craves a Lil something extra, the mindset knows that comes with attachments. Making it easier to simply stay to self...

Thinking again...

Emotionally disabled. There's a wonder of if self is able. So far behind the lines of opening up. There's a chance that the odds have turned on luv. In a disbelief state of clarity. Being more attracted with a mental stability. Knowing feelings are triggers of thought. Yet rare is a individual who isn't Codependent of the heart so raw. Protected is a concept only few free themselves from restraints. Others chase the feel good until the expressions change upon the face. Looking for a friend through a different angle. In the repetition of depths always getting mangled. As ours always back to the basics of one's own truth. Thinking again of all the bs n abuse. Myself ponders of the intellect of those that never learn. Curious to know if the even have self worth. It seems the thrill of racing heartbeats is more intriguing than a piece of mind. As we all live our own type of life...

Yet to find herself...

She falls deep for the bs. It's in who she is. Always seeking the thrill of attractions. Losing self in time due to the distractions. She judges fellas bcuz her choices are shit. N yet, her type isn't what she needs to truly live. It's all a hype in the mind. A fulfillment of cheep interactions that's hard to find. Wanting luv from the a made up version of hope. She just didn't know she's never gonna find the comfort of home. Chasing thoughts through memories that shadow silhouettes incapable of what she craves the most. Damn the heart that cannot understand the opposites that mingle in the mix of what it takes to be alone. In a mental state as she sits in disbelief. Labeling all men in the same sense more useless than a fling. Only if she could possibly correct her mindset. Back to an open process of what's good to the moment to invest. Yet, she's caught up in the visual appearance in a hypocritical phase. All bcuz who she chose isn't who she was able to transform into changing last names. She leaps into arms of profiles that act as the same ol same of never after. As bitter she drifts into a world of separations where it's just her. Caught up by her own desires wanting more than a lame to lay her the fuck down. Oh the passion of the act that provokes true intent. Connecting on another level of freeing self so depths can vent. It's a sexual intimacy that triggers the vibe. As down goes another heartache that's written as cry. She's a pawn of her own kink that drives hormones into the night. Past the limit of luv'rs that consistently fade by days light. N she cannot figure out the reason of why she falls so hard. As it's in the way characters play the part...

Nothing was ever meant to last...

Remembering how to let self adapt n live free. Being alone in ones head will make reality feel like a dream. With everything on the outside of us we're all alone. N yet, there's a choice of what to entertain as the heart roams. As the trick is being able to identify phases others are going through. To knowing when to grab some of an opportunity when it comes along to improve. Inside our minds a game of worth is played. As the universe just wants to interact with how we are all the same. Either we carry the baggage of past relations or say fuck the dumb. One hasta be in tune with the inner makings that define self luv. The ability to believe it's not over until the dirt covers what remains. N with the connection of life pulsating within the veins. Time itself will be challenged as the one who awakens mentally will be at peace. Living day in n day out with nights filled with their own little squeeze. With the comprehension that nothing was ever meant to last. So making the best of things hasta happen or it'll pass us up way to giving fast. Doing more than recollecting memories not yet ready to be repaired. For old age will come to the crossroads of a lifetime dared. Whether it be on the edge or in the safety of one's very own home. We get to decide what's what to us that makes the difference in true form being shown. Here we are to share everything that cannot physically get into our depths. But we feel it enticing us wanting our best...

Empty...

Reaching for the top from the bottoms up position. Selling time to the highest bidder n passing on life's intermissions. Same ol result of being broke is just never enough. Only thing to be shown for the loss of self is materials feeding the rush. Shallow in the makings of a better life friend out the experience to live. Having only periodical moments to be remembered as thought upon the lips. Dying while alive with nothing to look back on but work. For a chance at the end of it to ease back without the guarantee to enjoy the worth. To gain what is the purpose of happiness comes with a price. Sacrificing pieces of the now that go without a comfort other money's find. Caught up in a lifestyle of slavery rest becomes the downtime stealing even more. As breaths can only be heard in a sigh wondering why in the fuck it's all a bore. Empty days are a thrill of numbers on the rise. To spend after exchanging what cannot be relived for some sorta claim to be defined.

The untold finding a voice...

You speak of luv but yet fail to comprehend what it takes to be a friend. There's shit that's never been said as the release is to free weeks from the never coming off the end. Being the biggest person set on repeat as your tongue find it's way around my reputation. As it took hit after hit of all the things I've heard through the years knowing the real situation. N yet, my lips were sealed other than spicing up the stories about me bcuz idgaf what others think. As your name to me was sacred in a sense of why I'm the fuck couldn't I let go of nothing more than a dream. So to hear how you feel of me find me in other's words really sets the mood. Changing I did from a protractor to a man living loose. But it took some time to shake of the one thing I wanted the most. Someone I had no business giving my luv just to feel alone. It seems the chuckle you find in presence was enough to entertain the crowds you've come to know since. Although I don't mind for you're a fucked up individual in every letter it takes to pronounce skittish. Only if your lil fan base that feeds your narcissistic way's knew the truth. Of hope behind the scenes it's much different than what's on display for all to believe you're the one abused. Only thing you've ever known was an addictive life. Had I known myself prior to entangling my feelings with yours I would've cut ties. Let's tell them how you chose a lifestyle over everyone you've claimed to luv. N how I was the one standing still trying to hold it together as someone to trust. Or shall we not go back to the days where I was the one to blame? You were the one that caved. Weak for a reason to dip out on reality you refused to face. As it was I who allowed you to play so many unnecessary games. Secret be told I enjoyed watching you dig you grave. As you played in my chest n I covered you up for my own escape. Or was a beautiful time of getting to know me again. As you still linger at the bottom looking for a sucker to be your next biggest fan. Looks mother like daughter n I know that eats you up inside. But hey, I cannot lie when I say, "your a self inflicted disturbance beneath you own skin as you hide. So point your finger n have everyone stare. Bcuz the life I live simply doesn't fuckin care.. 

Getting it in...

Getting it in...

Not to brag but I've always been the better half. N that's why I do so much better on my own. It's a raw reality that creates a loner within. Trusting no one that is into the claims of thrones. As it's seen as an immaturity with a follow the lingo to fit in mindset. N that's when the disbelief of realism kicks in. For knowing ones place aside from the pretending to be more than a figurative thought. Knowing by myself I'd rather live. Not too brag but I've always been in my right state of mind. Having a drive that's gone unmatched by another faking their way. Even after losing so much there's just no stopping me. As my smile continues to stretch across my face. It seems that "fit" just isn't what it's said to be. With others falling victim to their own untold truths. Time has spoken over n again of how the level of use has me single ASF. N I'm not even out here in the middle of life running loose. Not too brag but I'm rare in many ways. Humbled by choices of a past that's grounded my heart. Being just one individual in a world of wtf's. No one within relations has ever stood on their word like it was so fuckin hard. Somehow to do good in life I've had to stick to myself. But I can't categorize everyone else for it's my own attractions that's failed to deliver. I like what I like so that's just the way it must be. I'm just a giver that would rather see the sliver of fake fucks floating facedown downriver. Not too brag n all but I'm more than what I'm willing to admit. But I'm just being me the only way I know how. In a solitude lifestyle that has a way to thrive. Without a leech sucking on sex as if I'm the same typical azz dude in the now. As there's pieces of me hidden behind the stare in my eyes. Well protected by the eagerness of freedom wanting to live. As the thought of what I must do compared to how I'd luv to give into depths that justifies the never ending hype. N it takes the vibe from the chuckles torn completely away from my ribs. Not to brag but I've got me the ways I cannot trust another to have. It's a solo act to step into each n every day. Trying to shake off the disbelief in people I simply cannot do. But hey, I tell myself "life is great". As I awaken to a financial world in which I must do more than consider. I havta survive without a friend by my side. With every night there's a peace that settles the nerve. It's the way it is n I don't know why. Not too brag but I've grown accustomed to dying as I live. I'm unable to miss what everyone else takes for granted when chasing relations. Recognizable facts make up intent in need to find comfort. N I've found it in me without the constant let down of distasteful imitations. Somehow I've simplified my situation by counting on me. Most say I'm broken but they don't understand the break corrected who I am. Now I'm here on the other side avoiding the same ol shit others are into. Distant yet intact bcuz I can enjoy being unaccompanied by tender hands...

Empty fulfillment...

Lost on social media. Waiting on for the right one to speak up. Time gets trapped in the doings. Night after night listening to everyone's conditionings of luv. Bored n willing to partake. Feeling somewhere foreign in life. Always watching for a hint of interest in words. Damn near validated within the mind. Feeling a sense of comfort but it's a lie. The singlish vortex sounds about. Defying relations  defining reason of why not to mingle. Fitting in with the broken ones so humor can be spout. The irony is unreal. The front is not to be mistaken. There's lil hope in dry into anyone true purpose. As emotions are complicated being forsaken. It's all set on a repeated timeline that never ends. A cycle of wirelessness that becomes a norm. Losing sight of a reality that once was. Sights locked into a screen is the individual reborn. Enslaved to a different type of living. Thinking a friends list some sorta fame. Having access to whomever at the touch of a thumb. Knowing self just wants some other form of escape. It's a false presence of people being whoever they wish to be. Able to block out the drifters n unwanted conflictions. As confidence is a post settling the nerve as if it's real adulting. It's a resurrection of worth like someone actually gives a fuck under the conditions. Everyone resembles one another even though they think they're unique. Without it there's an emptiness that lingers on. The attention once can get is a hype that lasts for a few moments of each day. N then it's on to the next meme waiting without vocal chords. Creating a purpose to cover up what no one wants some other to know. That deep down weed give it up for that one person to say our name. But the honesty in that is far n in between. So why not keep goin along with the emptiness of the game?

Please understand...

Please understand the emotion in me is in no rush. N thy mind didn't relate to faking straight into luv. Please understand I've evolved n would rather have a friend. Honestly, believe it or not, it would be more painful in the end. Place understanding in not fighting you feelings that tech for a use. I'm just different n realize what it'll take for my inner self to move. Please understand it's you n not me. I'm just living n attempting to let things progress naturally so I can breathe. Please understand tongues flip on the turn of tides in between moods. N I'm worth more than the discomfort of fowl play spat on the loose. Please understand I'm waiting on time to tell me a real connection had come through to be seen. As it's gotten in to my boundaries where I twiddle I'm my dreams. Please understand I comprehend the situation that remains as the facts. I get bored with everyone edit I know isn't the one standing intact. Please understand I'm not an easy safe to crack. Just so you know I'm not a challenge but a depth that doesn't like the thought of I'm a deletion left in a past. Please understand just bcuz two people get along means they're bound by the heart. Don't be blind to the individual I am shaking off hugs from wrapping arms. Please understand I'm not that complex to think there's no one for me. One just come to be me in a world that live by the same ol mindset of chasing needs. Please understand I enjoy the single life bcuz I'm as free as I choose. I'm just not so sure the one is gonna like who I am so I've called a truce. Please understand I truly don't give a fuck to fit into silhouettes.l that are never heard. I don't belong to a shadow of another when my own follows me for better or worse. Please understand this is what you'll havta deal with trying to get close to the person your sights have found. At I'll adjust accordingly to whom it is you've become in the now...

Find yourself...

I need not teach you for you should already know. Having you own developed mind is an attraction through actions shown. I'm no one to look up to n never have I been perfect. There's just this thing called live n learn that has transformed me into someone to invest. It's a way of life. A mindset that catches on to bs along the way. You either have it or you don't. But it's not on me for your inner makings to be rearranged. If you haven't spent enough time alone that's not my fault. We all need a loner moment to identify as self before collaborating from behind our walls. Growth from within is a beautiful thing when you can conversate beyond the typical nonsense that lays upon the surface of the tongue. You just havta wanna lmk low who you are first n foremost prior to falling in luv. Otherwise it's a matter of faking it until you make it that wastes everyone's time. N mine I cheesy deeply so evolve or step aside. I'm not gonna sit around n advance n you're simply not with it. The worth in the willingness to do you without them need if another creates a sharper wit. So you know who's good for you n what to avoid. N you're not a dependant so I refuse to be annoyed. Step up or get outta the way. I'm not waiting for to to understand. To be is to live n I comprehend the cycles of phases as I just wants my toes in the sand. 

Why lie.?.

I wanna run off your nightmares. I'd that what your wanna hear? Or would you rather play fair? Maybe get over everything you've come to fear. Idk, maybe it's just me. But I can't help but to think I'm losing interest in the feeling you hide. So from the tip of you tongue, tell me, what is it your need? Bcuz withor without you I have this thing called a life. N it waits on no one to correct their ways. Pain has no reason partake in the distance in been hearts. If you can understand that you're on your way to the heart escape. But for now to make life better I just cannot deal the cards. Hope floats like shit n sometimes it sinks. N yet, who are you if you're not in your true element of moving forward with sighs? Vent n get rid of the weight or I'm not the one to alter realities link. Meeting up to see about the mingle of taking flight. Wasted of not the remains you will be unless tensions can reside. Out longer the tide of years built up from a past you hold dear. Or is it that you're looking for a passion to cover up the feeling of low tides? I can make believe you're everything I've every long for. But why lie to take advantage of a phase just to fulfill my own lusts? You're no whore. N I ain't into falling to fast into luv...

Dunno...

Mood shifting. Back n forth. What to do when it's disturbing to the listening? Is there more? Has self been cheated outta the good life? Rusted hinges have an erie sound when revolving in motion. Hi. N then it's a past sense of devotion. There's truth has lies that represent a painted picture burned. Swing shifts of mindsets set adrift. In the coming or going, when will the heart learn? As the smile needs no help in its lift. There is no losing of what never sticks around. First come first serve delivers a war that rages between there ears. Taking up space in time that's yet to be found. With the confusion of wtf that creates unwanted fears. Telling it the way relativity speaks. Odds over evens revolves in the memory lost to dimming of lights. But ain't that the beauty of being free? Finding pleasures that make time slow to the find.

Timing...

Timing. Made possible by phases of life. A smile that triggers interests on the rise. Timing loosens the heart for the possibility of, why shouldn't I?  With a smirk that defines everything that hides in the dark of nights. Timing. It's in the way phases align in an unmentionable moment that makes perfect sense. In an act of craziness to leap without warning of what's only lent. Timing. Believes it's for the keeping fire all time. Moving in motion to believe in a different type of life. Timing. Tells the heart that it's ok to go back under the claim. Meeting the chill of the rain fun again to play on so the inner child escapes. Timing. Isn't everyday that reasons to the joy of opening up. As truth comes of a special kinda luv. Timing. Without watching the clock in an act of ignoring it moves to fuckin fast. When the removal is that of the mask...

Please don't...

Please don't get attached. I'm just living life n idk where home is as a guaranteed match. I'm no one. Trust n believe I'm a one man army always avoiding luv. Better, that's what you can do with someone else. Trust me when I tell you it's not me in which you are felt. It's sad but I can't help but to be honest. Truth is what I'm waiting on someone I don't know even exists as I wish I was modest. But my attractions is of the craved thoughts acting out inner submissions. As it's ok for you to know I have an admission. Come see what you've wondered about. I have no secrets worth hiding so I'm gonna claim my sleeve dripping dry so I'm not so loud. There's just no way to get to me unless. But that's for just a unique type of person in which I'd invest. Please don't believe I'm your forever in a lifetime as you live. I'm nothing special in on eyes staring at the physical glitch. N just like that you're over me. Awakening from a brief irrelevant dream...

A loon on the loose...

Disguised by the single life n making it look good. Yet behind the eyes wonders a peek a boo in secret looks. Think I'm the one outta billions roaming around is more than a chuckle waiting up n under the breath. Tell the truth, I'd be exposed to what comes next. So in a moment a choice to hi Dr e hasta be made. If not there's a chance I'd be seen coming to surfaced upon my face. Oh help me if it comes to be. I'm not ready for the birth of daydreams. Why change the way I think? I like my freedom so I don't mind if they leave. But then I sit n think of when will I ever give in to a friend. As blank thoughts comes to mind as I wait for the end. Caught up in the middle of life doing me the only way I know how. N to hear others tell it, I'm fowl. A loon on the loose bcuz I don't fall into the the role playing nonsense. But damn if it wouldn't be nice ASF to sit n ease back n lower the defenses. Shh, don't ask n I won't havta tell no lie. N we can all go on about our own lil lives. An undercover luv'r at best going to waste. Avoiding the conflictions of the heart that always turns to pain. Sorry I am not nor will I admit I have depth. Someone might want in beneath the humor that disturbs the groove. As I ask, why in the fuck should I play the fool. Knowing it's an excuse to keep it as safe as doing me. Simply trying to make it as long as I can before someone transforms from a want to a need. Yeah, the thought creates tension within but who in the fuck will ever fill the void. Just take words for what they are, noise. But don't listen or read along to what's out for the first time in idk in how fuckin long. Rambling is just a convo with self that finds a rare to tap into before the night goes wrong. Missing the feel of a woman as a man through the silence of having no one at all around. N yet the unrecognizable human within is misunderstood due to the means of surviving alone. Shoving under the tongue of just craving to go home. Concealed is the individual rounding out for a better cause. Lost but not really n in the same breath self just wants to take some time to pause. To gather what matters until the dig buries the reason to say fuck relation. Revealing worth hidden in the texture of what could never be considered an invasion. One good one would be a dream come true. As lips will babble of fuck it, there's no use. To scare off the weak n desperate needing to be luv'd in the now of gimme gimme or else. I'm not one so easily to be felt. I could go either way as it's in my best interest of what's best for me. N as of yet I haven't been a believer in luv without a like that enjoy the way I breathe...

Play thing...

The feel of your throat in my hand. Your pulse reaching for mine. I crave the texture of your skin. Fingertips squeezing with a snug to the sides. Slowing down the blood flow to your head. As you smile with the light headedness stare. In full acceptance for me to do as I please. Against the wall you wait naked n bare. The smell of your scent intrigues my hormones. As my heartbeat speeds up to catch that of your own. It's a simple pleasure of watching you go limp. Into an unconscious state knowing you're being groped. Oh the crave that’s set in your eyes to be taken. Used as a plaything as you're tempted to come from within. With a nibble upon the lower lip to show you I have good intent. Your submission creates a sinful grin. One in which comes to life in my palm. Still clinging to the reaction I cause. As my second hand feels it's way around you anatomy ever so slow. Touching imperfection so they find comfort in being flawed. It's a rare kinda desire I get when you're close enough to fondle. N the act of feeling horny is a gratifying gain. With you at my mercy I come to life. Dominating you like an orchestrated masterpiece willing to be played. As every stroke comes from deep within my needs. Wanting you the way you insist on me freeing your inner freak. N I question who's truly in control of the situation. With a faint of breath I enjoy making it hard for you to breathe. As I choke you to your knees for you to wait on my command. All awhile standing before you fully erect n teasing you. Daring you to approach my shaft prior to being told to do so. You're so beautiful down there n this is why it's you I choose. For when you're looking up with your mouth wide open. I become more of me in a way you complete my kink. So taste it n suck on me but I don't wanna explode. As you gag n beg for more like daddy's lil whore. As you eyeliner is smeared n running down your face. Caught up in your tears you say is to please me. But we both know you get of on being tested so bad. But that's what I like when you become my fantasy. You're dirty Lil play thing that person's gracefully to the abuse. My sex obedient sex toy freed from you depths. To live as intented with a deviant use. You turn me on in ways my passion feeds on your moans. Sight following the movement of your body totally in sync without a care. As I lift you up to bend you over. To go deep with in with a forceful thrust that makes you gasp for air. To pound you harder than you can take. Slapping your azz as it becomes whelped from pleasure. N with both hands wrapped around your neck I wanna hear you beg for more. Gimme the buried treasure...

Mind fucked...

Every now n again a crave comes along we wanna play with. A link ignored for so long until the news becomes words upon the lips. Brining truths from within the secrets of an admirer's desires. To touch in an act of pleasure caressed by the fire. Feeling the best created by the intensity of attraction. One day, unmentioned uses will eventually be rectified with satisfaction. For not many spark a curiosity that sends the mind into overdrive. Losing from afar just wanting paradise in a set of eyes to resemble pants shared in a sex life. A deep sensation is tucked away behind playful flirting craving more. One can damn near feel with the tongue of hidden body parts triggered to be explored. Here n there someone awakens the beast attempting to minded it's own. But even it cannot refuse the likeliness of what could be if ever two people were alone. Feeling their way through a moment that lingers. As the pulse wiggles a walk of prints released upon the tips of fingers. But the thought is trapped in the constant wonder that remains as silent as a mute. They come n they go never to be put to use...

Lock n key...

Let's see if I have the key to your lock. N if so we can swap. That way you can hold the one thing that opens me up. N I can finally believe I was meant for luv. Insert it for yourself as I watch. Give it a turn as if it's a nauch. N we can dance around the house every night for the rest of our lives if the tumbler spins loose. I wanna know if you're what makes me move. Or together we can feel the way the grooves slide jus past the tip. With each notch finding their way along before the twist. As smooth as the shalt with ease. Until it's fully buried within, shoulders deep. Within just to the head to think of the next moment waiting for us to show what it is we have to give. Lemme unlock you so we both can live... As free as the lockbar being released. N the shank of all things coming out so the feel is a relief. From the tumbler to the pins to the locking mechanism within. The click of a counter clockwise twist is all that's needed so give it a spin...

Patience gave up...

Stepping forward from the back of the mind. Whispers trigger doubt in the middle of wasting time. Self isn't worthy of another real enough to hold their end. The feeling is overwhelming to even consider someone that type of friend. It's inevitable that they'll turn away one day. Taking more pieces of confidence that's already a shattered smile upon the face.  Standing corrected once the comfort of noticed takes affect. There's no need to pretend bcuz it's all special effects. Made to create a front only the mirror can see through. As living alone for the year of time is most likely chuckles amused. To be reminded of momentary interference before they go back to their prior lives. As if the skip of a rock is anything more than a ripple moving side to side. Far from the center where the impact is depths lingering with an uncertainty of compatible use. Self cannot ignore the voices that refuse to commend a truce. So to listen to the reality of I trapped within is a raw motionless stare. The belief of being wanted just isn't a thought allowed to be bared. As when with others there's still an emptiness pulling from the inner makings of the heart. N there's no need for pity for it's just the way things are. Something's just missing beneath the physical presence of me. I guess my patience gave up as I set myself free. To depend on no one ever again. Caught up in the peacefulness of the cycle attempting to redefine what's been banned...

The end comes quick...

Looking at all the wrong faces causes a frustration of misplacement. Creating a temperamental unrest within emotional replacements. Damn near everyone is not right for the situation for self to open up. As friends are limited to the time it takes to get to know trust. One, two, three n then the head shakes in disbelief. Thinking with the thought of where in the fuck is the release? To be freed by another to effortlessly. It's always short lived when other wanna know the inner makings of harmony. Protecting others who desires to get close enough to the fire. The end comes quick to dilute the feeling reaching for what grown tired. N the cycle continues to adjust a Lil bit more in between the transformation craving to find a place called home. Simply living in a mindset set out to be alone. Eyes aren't a thrill to gaze into. All that's ever seen is an empty voyage staring back as it's on the go. The seek of the will has no thrill to capture sights locked in. Nothing settles into the depths chuckling in the ribs. Hearts break softly before long term has a chance to cling. As it's for the better off of contentment easing into the leave. With a vague memory of a moment drifting  from side to side. Watching through the crowd to set who's who with the flow of the tide. With footprints in the sand that only last so long. To facial expressions losing interest once the lines become from the fog. In a guarded presence as if the sun refuses to shine. I'm theakings of life there's a wasting of time. Flipping with a flop from one luv'r to the next. Building a resistance buried deep in the cages chest. Wanting a certain kinda comfort to live out in the open as is. Many things go without saying or even touching the lips. Hiding the desperation leaking from a sacred insecurity on the move. Chasing away all that step into the circle of use. With a patience that fuels the beast to mingle with rotating moans. All put into a group set aside to get to a voice that needs no tone.

Friendly gesture...

Holding in the heat under the covers but don't make me sweat. Time ain't shit when it comes to a friend as it's meant to be spent. Get comfy n find some z's n let the night progress. Just don't hide your true intent bcuz it's a fine line between more or less. But settle in n feel free to be who u are when you're alone. As it's upon your request of you not wanting to go home. Sometimes the misplacement gets the better of the mind that runs from thoughts. In need of a friendly gesture for a moment in the making of a pause...

What's done is done...

Blinded eyes. Blink n in a state of reality lost in a dream. Unable to see the change on full display. Sight turns to memory wanting to believe the same ol same. As self is in the way of ever giving the benefit of the doubt. With a venomous spew from that leaps from the tongue so loud. Hatred fueld in depths cannot be corrected. The pain n confusion settles in the claiming of nerves as if infected. Setting the willingness so fast outta reach others havta live in a recycling discomfort. Bonds broken by bad decisions never heal. There's always a pointing finger no matter the process taken to right the feel. Admittance isn't accepted as the beginning of where things turned for the worse. N to be forgiven is nothing more than empty words. You can't go back n there's nothing that can be done. The dwelling is the only thing that'll ever be shown. Held to convictions to relive the mistakes along the way. N as that's wanted it's to be noticed as an improvement from a prior self. Looked upon as human that's learned a few things that could help. But the belittlement is buried in the mental aspect to remind someone of it all. Chance is a myth once the moment complicates life as the heart falls. Down so low as to disturb the good placed in their face. N that's when the inner mashed from them tend to fade. Pulling back from the abuse of emotions clinging to the smiles curve. To redirect it's desperation to get others to witness true worth...

No coming back...

That missing part of what you speak of is part of never fighting the good fight. Never bouncing back to have that one person willing to get down with u in the middle of life is the sigh. It'll always be a memory bcuz of what you've never applied yourself to gain. As hearts, if real with how they feel, well forever be broken to the break...

I heard nothing but periodical words n it wasn't enough. I was worth more the way you are for another to earn my luv. It wasn't easy letting go n I'm not sure I truly have. But the reality of it all stays hidden behind my face bcuz I'm gonna be ok here today...

Even though you're where you are as it bothers me every day. That's the part where you simmer accepting the life you live as I escaped. For your own reasons is why I had to shut down on everything you've never known. So the missing part, for years I've missed coming home...

To a place that no longer exists even in my mind. Somewhere where we're lost in time together claiming mine. N yet everything is subject to change if two people aren't willing to put in the work. As I'll miss you always, until I'm placed in the dirt...

Set adrift...

I told myself if I ever feel in luv again I'd never come back. So I held out waiting for what was to present itself to the facts. I fell in luv just to ask for my heart to be returned to me. As I stood emptied from head to toe lost in a dream. Knowing emotion found it's calling after so long. N every moment was captured in the lyrics of each song. Damn the years it took to let go so I could listen to certain jams again. But when it's real it never heals just right. It just fades in time until the tingle isn't affected by the mind. It was the hardest thing to admit. That the one way street was my willingness set adrift. As friends wouldn't make to the now. A far fetched reality is as is that has been found. Once luv'd in a way eyes had truths unseen till this day. As desire was more than a sexual interaction stretched upon the face. Oh the memories that remain are intense. As they're fun to go through bcuz everything here today makes perfect sense. From never seeing self wanting anyone else to regaining what was lost times ten. As I think to myself, the loss was a win that hurt in places I'll prolly never reach again. In a timeless era of life I've lived n luv'd all I share. In belief I believed I hadn't anything to spare. Without reason of self worth was shattered. Creating a new version of a clown to take away from the details that mattered...

Closer...

Standing closet to me will get you felt up. I'll reach for a feel if you're near enough to touch. Lemme feel your body n I'm telling you imma squeeze something tight. N if I like it I might just claim it as mine. Shh step back n adjust your intent. Coming at me wrong will get you fucked n this I will not pretend. You'll submit to me if u insist of rubbing up on me as if we're a pair. Friendly my azz bcuz it doesn't fly for I don't care. Get yourself groped n come on over here n lean in. Looking at your I'm already licking my lips. I'll call u Pucker as I kiss you quick. Letting you know from head to toe that there won't be a inch missed. I'll ravish your flesh as cute as u are. With fuck sounds I'll place myself deep in your heart. Think I'm playing is your first mistake. I'm good with the game as long as it comes with depths at stake. Needless to say it's your move to show n tell. More that you know of my angle of you on me, I want your smell. You could even leave it on my pillow come mornings light. I'm that willing to chance the thrill to change your life. Cocky? Nah. I jus know what I like. N this is my introduction of saying, "hi". I wanna frisk you. So jus press yourself against me n I'll put you to use. That's all it'll take for me to find you the key. So you can unlock desires hidden within lonely fantasies. Yeah, confident I am n I don't get this way too often. But for a moment with you I'd soften. As I'm waiting on even a simple caress for you to give me the go. N it won't be long until we're both going home...

Times...

Sometimes. There's this save that swallows me up. Waking away the cover from up under I get to the point where emotions are to fuckin much.  Chasing live alone I put from within what I've hushed. At times. I'm a wasted moment with years in my eyes. Trying to figure out how in the fuck things turned out the way they did. As I lose another piece of myself to the pain. With a heavy heart reminding me of the human within. There's times. An emptiness consumes me outta the blue. Touching the details beneath the surface that don't quite move. But until the rush of lemme out rising from depths wanting to be felt. As I get quiet n drift with memories that never helps. Better times. Find me in rare form getting leaking from the hand I delt. With a sense of where did the old me go? The serge pulsates fit a while until I remember to the train I do not belong...

Wanting you...

Would I be wrong if I said, "it's too bad I ain't your type". Don't of the things I just don't say goes a Lil something like, I could see me being caught up with you in life. N just waking up to you everyday woke be equivalent to the fresh air I breathe. Giving more a of reason to live day by day as nights we do more than dream. Yeah, there's untold truths of my hungar for you I have this crave I've had to settle down but I can still feel it move. I try not to think about it but when I look at others they just ain't the one I want. N with saying that there's so much left it's my smile that shins the tech of withers luv. I'm just being honest as I sit behind the scenes. Taking part in the audience you need to help you believe your worth. But damn if you don't know what someone like me do for you to hear these words. As yes I know even with the softest o silence I'd just be in your way of your trying to catch the attention of your crush. The truth is the wickedness of the have is who makes us blush. With a stare that just doesn't wanna look the fuck away. Although I don't see me in the expressions creating happiness upon your face. I'll live though. Ain't nothing but an emotion riding the possibility of what if that haunts me with a taunt....

I don't mind...

Belittle me n then pretend to be my friend. It's ok bcuz you can never get to me. N to be honest, I've fallen in luv with the way relations end. I can get back to doing whatever in the fuck I want. Without the strangulation of a so called luv. So put me down n stomp on my name. Treat me as if m a lesser person bcuz I just can't wait. New beginnings that knows my with are a priceless thing. Some say my mentality of fucked. But in actuality not many can be with the earning of trust. Lacking the ability to hold another's emotion closer to their own hearts. So spit your venom upon my face. N watch how my expressions will never change. With or without you is in how your are of a forever after or a never again.  Break down n verbally insult me if you will. I'll go back to being a stranger with a smile that knows you're missing more than an empty thrill. A in the moment of only feeling yourself when times get hard. As you'll listen from afar of hours my silence plays it's part. I don't mind bcuz I like my freedom to be me. It's NCIC I comprehend the concept of wants m needs...

Absorbed within...

They feel self a little too much as self makes them believe everyone is playing games. When it's a mental illusion to protect the heart shuffling pain. N it's those they choose to fuck with is who sets the stage. Mind fuckin any chance to take part in the flickering of flames. As it's their own inability to see angles taken by others. With one wrong move the body becomes jus another luv'r. Leaving thoughts to process in yet another phase as people are placed in a category in which depicts everyone is the same. Just for the walls to get bigger n higher with the turnabout that comes along with every new face. Failing to realize it's a matter of having a bad judge of character. N the more severe it is the more likely vanity n sex is the key to the pain that is so unbearable to worth. Truths are shoveled like dirt to bury a belief that someone somewhere is genuine willing to give their best. N there's no one to blame due to the attractions blinding intuition placing bets. They're absorbed within the defeat sinking in to the loneliness after so long. As the reel behind the eyes spins to replay everything that's gone wrong. All bcuz they believe everyone but then it's on some BS. In which makes them in their own, a pfft set lose from the lips...

Sticky notes...

Leaving sticky notes in brail on the heart for when it awakens from it's time out. So it knows the details of how it's supposed to interact with reason's pound for pound. Helpful little hints put in place so emotion doesn't allow just anyone in. For the mind needs the coexistence of feelings to properly relate n truly live. Scribbles written are to correct self's partake in the matters of opening up. Thoughts aren't enough to complete interactions with another trying to find a use for luv. One without the other is a creation of lonely times. But to allow depths to run free in an unfamiliar hope is damn near a passion's suicide. So in this state of sycosis where the sleep is to rest desires craving to come back to life. The wait is a patience that calms the process of thoughts beyond lusts hype. To involve the blind with a vision felt as a pair. Reunited within is the outcome more than displayed on sticky notes holding together scars so they never again tare...

Use is in the process taken...

To become familiar with the contents. Attempting to adjust to more than comments. With sexual behaviors set to the side. Knowing hormones n emotions are an angle to overrun the mind. So it's slow n steady as patience comes into play. As most will forget it's a mental game. Yet, how wrong their thoughts are when they cannot get what they want. If luv isn't the last thing on the menu then wtf is trust? Without the wait to witness another in true form. Time tends to leave should be friends to their own type of norm. As the struggle of just living life to see where it goes is a solo act. Keeping attachments just outta reach so intent is matched. When all people ever want is the full package handed to them. As if giving self away is an attraction more than lent. The thrill isn't as good to the touch once the feel has it's turn. It's gonna take the individual to be seen as the difference without saying a single fuckin word. Use is in the process taken to mingle behind the lines where strangers lurk. Reaching in with hands to squeeze with a groping flirt. N in the eyes of others the wait isn't as appealing. As self sits alone n accustom to living out life without the double dealings. Things just aren't allowed to flow naturally so a bond can interact. To be enjoyed as a person taking part in a situation that lowers the mask. For some reason the pulse forced by the heart refuses to ease the fuck up. As it's not always bad thing to adapt in certain ways as it just wants to be luv'd. It's just if that's all there is, enticed by sex. There's no point in baring depths kept safe in the chest. No one truly knows anyone. Nor the capabilities of their transformation that go unknown into the day comes to end what's been hushed. For the bad times are approaching that tells everything of what there is to know. Be careful of who it is you hold...

Cry...

Cry with me. No one will hear you. Not one person will ever care. So in the moment live loose. Free yourself from the burdens. From the endless crave to matter. People aren't interested in you. They just wanna be entertained with the uncontrollable laughter. It's fucked but it's true. You n I are alone. Moving simultaneously to wasted facts pushed to the side. We're nothing special to the desperation of hope. So weep. Release the tension gathered in depths. To the other side we shall inter into reality. It's a place where the face never gets wet. As time didn't rush to pass so fast. Let the weights carried leak. One good cry. N down goes the flow touching the cheek. Feel it. Find pieces of yourself as your remove the twisted sick sensation of being wanted by anyone other than you. With a demented smile come back to life. Cry for use...

Old things gone bad...

My heart was set for life. I found comfort in a unique piece of mind. But damn if you didn't step the fuck up. N I'm not sorry to say fuck ya! Not really but I had to to shut down the neverending rush. In you I fell the fuck in luv. Just for you to walk straight thru me the way you did. Oh the emptiness. The feel of looking back at this world never to be missed. With you I had happiness. I found a better version of me. Fit the first time ever I was freed. Smiling like I never felt myself come the fuck alive. As I lay these days with the cool of a cold heart raping my mind. But there you are, nothing more than a dream. A fantasy once lived as if suffocation keeps me in my knees. Then I get to the other side of tipsy while drinking alone n I remember the way you move. As you come back around the memory to hang out to cut me loose. I know. Let go. Damn me for trying to be witnessed before you were to leave. Fuck you. That's the thought I get when you think of me. So I dream. I drift without a pause. I'm lost. N you're making it look like I never mattered. Ignoring the fact that hearts went with the pitter patter. Way to go. You won your own game just so you know. You overlooked the fact that luv was deep in the middle of desires heat. But at least one of us are free...

We've all been there.

Pages...

Read along n find the written message of words placed specifically in alignment in the open. Let your sight caress each letter as if it's your story jotted down as your depths are showing. Slowing to the pulse of truths reaching for your mind to come undone. In a moment on pages to comprehend there's someone else in this fuckin world that's in a mental sync never to rush luv. I'll be on the other side of the arrangement of the twist watching your eyes flow. As a witness to how you feel the delivery when your lips shape syllables wanting to be known. From one human to the next I sit on display in a rare view just far enough away from ever being seen. Imagine if you will the author having to write out thoughts created in the heart where time cannot breathe. Waiting on someone to do more than turn the pages of selfish use. To become a piece of a story yet find sound in a voice so lovely new angles come through. Follow me with your fingers as if I whisper upon blank pages craving to be a timeless masterpiece. Touch me to go with the curves of expressions damn near brail sighing with ease. Pulling you into my world that isn't so much different from yours. As details leak out bcuz the inner makings flirt with something that can be so much more. From over here you look quite stunning to my naked sighs. Sinking in to the pages absorbing a tale captured of you n I...

Size doesn't matter...

They may not be strong enough to pick you up n help you when they're done. But they can trip you n watch you fall outta luv as they run. Smiling like it's funny bcuz they've secretly been interacting with someone else elsewhere. N on contact the ground will awaken self to the instant pain that gives the heart a tare. In such a small package they can do so much damage just the way they can. As the man in the mirror questions himself of how emotions land. Changing facial expressions as if beat down by passions fading away. It's amazing that such a little person can transform how a fella moves so elusive with every new flame. Damn near dancing to avoid being burnt by hands so soft. As the face in his reflection is where the witness of himself is lost. Knowing there was a time in a prior time that he was more than willing to feel life on the upside of laughs. But since the tumbling over a leg sweep there's just not been much of a need to repeat the past. For fear has settled into depths that have become comforted by the solitude. As thoughts will never forget how size doesn't matter when she decides to take aim to shoot. Taking down the biggest of men in a single shot. So why would we ever allow them to find our sweet spot?

Unheard...

I wanna talk to you but I don't know you. N it makes it easier for me to keep it on the move. I'm a recluse that doesn't take to too many others. N I can't seem to take to the arrangements of luv'rs. I only wanna get attached to one person as that's the truth. As I wonder if your curiosities drift needs proof. I'm not typical nor ready to fall head over heals. There's details in which I wander of mentally with as the thought of mental stability fits the feel. Bcuz honestly I've taken a liking to the way you appear to be. Little do you realize that maybe I'd like to assist you in your moment to live free. The thought has come up n I cannot lie. It's more than you know that you cross my mind. Although it's possible that it's just a phase. If I can be truthful it's rare that within another I wanna escape. To have someone else feel me the way I do them. As I'm only words away from the moment of when. So take it for what it is as I hide in plain sight. Knowing damn well I'd enjoy adding you to my life. But I lack the courage to let true intensions to be known. I've just fallen in luv with the piece n quiet is all. N I don't want anyone to come along n free me is why I don't give relations a second thought. I'm at peace but I'd like to try n figure you out. Something strange has come over me n I just wanna hear the way your voice creates sound. For it's the simple things I daydream of. Craving the concept of like before luv. The thrill of touch rides my nerves. As I will for some odd reason, go unheard...

Do tell...

Do tell me why I can't believe you telling me you're so much fucking different. Speak as I remain silent so you can get through the confusion of indifference. I need not question what you say is the truth. Yet, I cannot take your word they sound similar to others wanting to be put to use. So choose your words with precise precision. N find me intrigued if you will in a moment of persuasion. Entice me with truths that live beyond words spoken. N neither of us will ever end up heartbroken. As the tongue slivers to alter sound. I'm listening so I can hear the message coming from your mouth. Do tell it the way you shall. Just don't mimic the crowd...

Coexisting with ease...

No sex. Just friends. Let's see how well we mingle first. Talk n put things on the table so intensions don't lurk. We can be as upfront as truths can show. Possibly finding a reason to move forward with words. To conversate on another level where friends exist. No touchy, no feely, just u n I biting our lip. Holding back what we feel we want each other to know. So a chameleon doesn't appear full of desperate hope. Hands off n emotion set aside. Just allow there to be a u n an I. Coexisting with ease. Without the urgencies of pleads. As is in true form as the individuals are noticed. Face to face n staying focused. Taking breaths that fill the mood. Undisturbed by what doesn't move with the room. As steady as sure can align with a use witnessed. Doesn't obtaining the cure of happiness...

No aches, no pains...

I fear hurting you if there's ever a need to defend myself. All due to how it's me on the flip side of not being felt. Fit luv is as selfish as his it makes self feel just that. Self, in a situation of attempting to luv another before the closing of the past. I'm not into the pain that's followed by the resentment soon to surface. To me the childishness is worthless. So, if it's friends we cannot be we shall not cuddle up. I'm scared of the aftermath that will occur with the cussing of luv. N I'm taking into consideration of your facial expressions that'll change trust. Draining it with an emptiness drowning the eyes. You're smile is with more than me protecting myself bcuz I havta. Bcuz if it ever gets to that point we were never anything more than luv'rs composed as a sad arietta. The ugliest side of us will destroy the feel of who were thought we were. N we both know nerves wouldn't settle until our own version is heard. N that's the dreaded final call. The day we stand face to face as away we fall. In opposing directions back into the crowd. Listening to whippers in the wind that sound so loud. Coerced I will stand for me. Even if it's your potency disturbing who it is I am to be. It's frightening to think I'd harm u in any way. So let's not interact n live for another day...

Chapters of the novel...

Luv is a phase n then it shakes attachments off. From their touch to their faces, strangers wanna get close just to turn around n get lost. Like never fits quite right looking for a certain type. N the hype runs its course as lips slip into thoughts roaming through in the mind. The heart luv's emotion so can feel alive. As periodic relationships claim territory of the body until the end divides. Wasting desires n time on someone left in the a prior moment. Craves change n passions get redirected into eyes of a strangers stare trying to hold it. Depths empty n comforts fill the core in many ways. In a stage under conditions where real didn't cause pain. But yet, the interaction runs it course. As it's always back to self wanting no more. Junctures of in n outta compatibilities is a realization of growth. Especially when it's safer to sit alone. Far from the rotation of luv'rs calling each other the same pet names. As in between episodes expressions settle into a calm stretched upon the face.

Day night day night...

Lonely by the night rotation trying to escape the fight. Alive n running by days giving mornings light. History in the makings no one ever knows. Home being the one place torn am n pm. Living through the mingling of empty dms. Alone in the hrs behind the shade. Expressions upon the face shape shift as time is paid. With silence becoming a long friend. Just to feel life from the sun touch the skins singe. Like a revolving door chasing the stillness moving within its realm. The ol topsy turvy of the teetering seesaw goes up n down. As the back in forth of daily moods transform with the now. From dark places to bright skies. Opposites of self linger within disciplined sighs. From the pits of solitude to the upright living. What's hidden from sight is true self wasting away in the act of not giving. Trapped in the illusion of hope nothing ever feels alive. But in the come around of the return of sun rays there's a difference in the hype...

Speechless...

Sidestepping verbal validations. Listening to words. Cheep n whatever comes to mind. Saying anything to give another worth. But rather is the matter to shut there fuck up. So truths rise to the occasion. In the s silence of the eyes that cannot lie. Maneuvering within with the feel of a new invasion. Lips motionlessness to expressions hushed. Awaiting actions to lead the way. Through the course of time use is in the patience taken. Giving a different type of comfort upon the face. Safe n confirmed with a friend to be made. Saved for the future to play out. Without a need to rush let's into a form of cheep thrills. To live in the moment of the flow. Getting to the in particular precise second knowing is fulfilled. Capturing the process. In a muted pause. Noticing the motivation that creates smiles. Changing the sand ol same for a better cause...

The saddest part...

Behind the smile n the stare there's a loner white afraid. And to create laughter in an instant but yet sinks deep into chains. Bound to a safe place no one knows the fear of being touched. As being felt is a little too close to luv. A madness of spontaneous bits of who resides within can be seen. Although remove the mask n fragments become too much to breathe. The clown hides truths tuck away tight. Away from the beginnings of ends that lose the fight. As even friends are at a distance to calm a nerve. The solo act isn't all but a show as eyes lurk. One finger applied to the skin scares self back into its hole. Looking n craving yet, another joke. A better sense of a thrill that's willing to play. Diverting attention away from emotion to dilute the expression upon the face. Just to remain alone so the inner makings don't move. Sidestepping interests the chuckles live loose. Always ready for the next quick wtf. As chuckles get with the giggles to avoid anyone seeing the lack of trust. It's an art on display that speaks of the twisted contents that submitted to the silence. Admitting that depths are far too deep for relations inevitably turning verbally violent. For the never again was meant as a promise to self. As the entertainer was enhanced so others could grin from a little help. Beneath the surface there's someone that wants more but cannot escape. Due to the belief of use played the fool n lost at the unwanted games. The drifter of sorts that just wants to go home. Not knowing in which way to go. So, the shit show is what everyone gets. To protect self so no one hears the truth whispered from the lips...

Inches in..

2 inches in n her eyes opened up. I wasn't sure of what I witnessed but I could've sworn it was luv. Damn she was tight to the fit of it hurts. I felt her wrapped around the thickness of my girth. N I could only imagine how she felt when the next 3 inches reached for her heart. With slow strokes I watched her moan herself apart. Listening to my whispers of shh, just take it. As with a shove there was a forcing of the 6th n 7th inches in that went past where anyone has ever been. Deep inside her wet juiciness is how I found the snuggliest pussy I'm yet to come across. As she spoke in words that went, please, easy, you're too big. But I wasn't even fully in. N when I told her she pressed as put her hands on my chest. Trying to catch her breath before I inserted the rest. N as she loosened up the eight inch was strong n hard n full of give it me. With a submission in her escape. She came out to play. To enjoy the stretching goin bang bang bang. Oh damn is what her sighs sang. Moving along with the bed creaking n rocking with the motion of wetness flowing. But it wasn't until that final bit of what was left of me was buried in her depths that I heard her gasp to the knowing. In an admittance of she's never opened up in such a way. It was laying upon the orgasm coming outta her face. Wanting to be seen. Craving to feel me cum in the moment of my dick in the bottom of her needs. Fully submerged n climaxing we simultaneously let loose. As our bodies went limp like we couldn't move...

Back to number one...

I found what I wanted but it wasn't what I thought it was. N it wasn't until I fell so fast in that I realized the truth of luv. Blinded by a smile of such beauty I was consumed. I found you but I wasn't what truly moved you. I was words expressed that never showed proof. As I lingered in life waiting on my heart to cut you loose. I found me n there's no you here as I've called a truce. Truth be told, it was a one way rendezvous. N it's made me more aware in the aftermath of there's is no us. But that in its own is a matter of it's me I havta luv... 

The key...

She gave him the key that opens everything to her world. Made him promise never to give it back, even if she lost her word. N he held it close to his heart for the keeping. Shameless n selfless as there just was no such thing as leaving.  Happy. That's the thrill of the connection they shared in smiles lit up. So far behind there lines there was no returning from luv. It was them until the end came to take one or the other away. As only one would be left to carry on with memories expressed upon their face. As the bitter sweet relations changed through the course of time. Periodically one or the other was the one holding on to hope to ease the mind. With years lived they'd became someone else. Damn near a stranger due to together they forgotten what it was that was once felt. Until the moment came to be to, go their sperate ways. Redefining the contents of emotion still lingering in depths empty space. It seemed they were good on their own for so long. Then she met someone new that transformed her into a different sound of song. He asked her for her hand to wed as she gasped trying to catch her breath. Ready for a life of whatever comes next. N as she stood at the alter staring into his eyes. That old feeling of belonging came back when her ex walked through the doors n said, "hi". Jaws dropped but he arrived to the occasion in peace. With a stretched out hand to break a promise by giving her the key. The symbol of simplicity that bound them forever as one. He was willing to wish her the best with tears falling from what's been hushed. From the purity of admittance that it would be them in a lifetime of no matter what. With a silent look she knew he had to give up. N with a turn he stepped back to allow her choice to move on. So she could fulfill the dreams he couldn't help her explore. But before he got to the door she called out his name. With a unique but familiar tone in her voice she said, "this is yours babe". Stopping him from disappearing outta sight. To hide away like a creature chasing the night. She remembered in that moment that it was them no one else could ever explain. He must've unlocked the right door along the way to keep her wanting everything worth the save. For she couldn't let him live without her by his side. Once upon a time ago, luv found a like. It was meant to last as it's still alive n heard. Her friend kept his word to put her first.

Changing degrees...

 Luv is one the temperature from good to bad. Willing to create a tomorrow that isn't forgotten in the past. At the heat is caused by the excitement reclassifying the heart. Intensifying moments that conflict with the beauty of charm. The sizzle melts cold emotions that revive the feel. Yet is but careful passion's flame will burn them to a singeing meal. As two can taste the flavor on intent. Or bitter into the flesh once the end is present. Fluctuating fahrenheits define time's expectancy to coexist. Continually warming the thrill for the feast. Taint the meetings of the inner beasts. Hungry n craving the touch of a luv'r. Playing with a friend said to be more than the day relations are over. Simmering going either way. Either coming back into focus after a fight or riding out the sauce to clean plate...

Fit to fill...

I wonder how'd we'd fit. Physically, mentally, n emotionally. As the crave of desires meet facts kicking in. I think of how tight you'd be wrapped around the way you make me breathe. With a moan of your own to add to the mix. Stuffed full within the heart as there's no room within you left. Feeling every inch as I stand firm. As the pulsation reaches for your chest. I'm curious to know if we'd meet in the middle. Of life, ourselves, n with the universe surrounding only us. As touch isn't the only thing we crave. N hope has nothing to do with the makings of luv. Willing n able to not only say but to rescue again each other from all other pet names. The curiosity of the comfort of you laying on my chest. Hearts as close as they can be as we commit to invest. Flowing with the passion through every aspect in life. In sync with you on me resting to ease our minds. Thinking about us. In the calming of the rush. Slowly touching the naked flesh in be a caress felt deep within. I think about the moment we begin to live...

The crippling invasion...

Sharing pillows with the enemy. Crossing lines within dull energy. Lies camouflaged in stares. An unknown threat waiting to rip a tare. With twisted intensions that raise hope to the occasion. The heart not knowing of the crippling invasion. In it for self their truth is disguised. Hidden in plain sight. A foe in a moment of make due. Giving just enough to appear to be proof. Comfort wrapped in warmth of arms settling the nerves. Listening to all the little things spoken in words. Unaware there's a monster creeping through life. Holding hands felt just to pass time. Gathering smiles in thoughts that create a memory made to keep. Yet, to see a so called friend set thier own self free. Days become months that combined to make years. Sitting in the company of someone who will soon define the meaning of tears. The pretender moving in motion with emotions that sway. Lacking true devotion rarely displayed upon the face. Hearing whispers softly saying thy name. Waiting on their moment to escape. Blinded by another's stare drifting with sight. As it's another they silently seek lingering in life. Quietly ignoring the quality of who lays next to them in the present. Self will become a past thought of a distant presence. The process is long with a deceitful motive. N through it all self is the one that was never noticed...

Look into me...

Don't close your eyes. Witness a stranger n become that vibe. Look into me. Feel the nature of the beast. Be. Outside of all your lonely daydreams. As close as breaths can be felt. Upon they lips with the head on tilt. Take a look as kisses create a pulse. When finding a friend in a moment where times with the pause. Open up. Be seen as someone to trust. Going with the flow of passion held within. Move with my body as u grasp a grip. Touching with a sense of it's me you cannot resist. Letting self come out to make a reality outta that unfulfilled wish. Take a peek into my stare. Let's peel each other back layer by layer. Going deeper than comfort can dare. As skin finds joy in being flush. Once again before it's too late we can be the rush. The consumption of use wanting to play. I'm no one in which you havta be afraid. Focus on how I look at you. How you accept the man I am admitting a truce. I'm a whisper in between sighs clinging to desires. Light that fire. Watch how the night exposes my mind. Running off silhouettes created to be redefined. On display upon the wall walls opposite from the flame As our shadows become one n we regain the expressions upon our own face. Chuckling with a ripple reaching the shores of the heart. Lay your sights on me as I mean you no harm. Up close n personal is the thrill I seek. Aware that it's you that you've come to free. In the design of my corneas, come find me. N try not not to blink...

Until we meet...

I don't want you to see me with anyone else. So I remain single waiting to be felt. For you to pass me by wouldn't be his for me. To be fun in your eyes with another in my life. I'd miss out on it as as I lose my mind. As there's just some things patience truly stands for. I guess I'll see you eventually when you're done taking score. Trying out smokes to see which one fits you the best. Knowing it isn't me face attached to the feeling so it's not the same when it's coming from the chest. All yourself if I was taken then how would you know it was me? The one you've admitting doesn't exist but I'm dreams. As even in there I can't chase anyone but you. But your not here nor there to be put to use. Maybe time just forgot about us. Or possibly, you're holding on to someone you think is your one n only. With a loner within that aches for more. Do you ever state off into the unknown n think something's wrong in your core? Bcuz I'm stagnant but sidestepping others that claim to be your silhouette. Looking like I'm broken but it's ok bcuz I know, with you I'll take my last breath. N it could be I've already encountered the likes of you. Idk due to I'm so far in my lane I can't see the wood. Caught behind the lines of myself without a friend. As it'll prolly be this way until the end. Even though I'm open minded to what you may look like. It's who you are that will cure my sight. From the blur I believe we're trapped within. Feeling our way around in others from time to time seeking to live. Falling short or fighting the urge to submit to a stranger having something to give. Or is it you are just that? N somehow I've dismissed the chance n placed you in my past. Idk but I havta keep on moving. Can't stop, won't stop, until we meet in the middle of the soothing. Thinking, damn it's nice ASF to finally have you around. But for now...

Two as one...

Opened without limits. Sexual desires fueled no matter the filth that resides tasted upon the lips. Convo free to explore whatever comes from the thought. Kinky or straight to the point as friends have a cause. Bonded by likes living life to the fullest. With edges trimmed are that of useless bullshit. Relations clicking on every level in accepted as the comfort of weird. I'm a unique way of loose that lives by an example without fear. Able to be as is n at peace within the walls of the mind. Getting at the true origins with another set out to gain a rare type of grind. Whether or he tired the fuck up or having a night out. Together on the outside of boundaries where honesty creates the passage of passion found. A little quirky n a whole lotta freakiness. Faking in to the feel of truth wrapped up in happiness. In luv with the smile that stretches upon the face. Listening to content as tongues twiddle names. Fuckin n touching for fingertips to play with the skin. As reality is like a dream come true today never wants to return from the trip. Having a use to empty the contents of the heart. N much more as submissions interact with charm. In a breathtaking kinda way that gives air to the inner obligation to be self. Feeling a hand hold firm the details felt. Met in the presence of come out n fuckin play. By night n by day. Depths cannot deny the facts of disturbed that for every so nice. Laughing with the twisted sense of wtf in the eyes. Staring down a match  facing back. In the middle on a norm with the key the gates. With the fine print on between each line that needs not read. Did the confirmation is in the linger of there is no next. Mates, luv'rs n a lifetime of whatever in the fuck happens just does. Seen, noticed n witnessed to me enjoyed up close n flush.

Inside out...

Your face can only say so much. Body will only uphold until age creeps up. So who is it you truly are? I'm life playing parts. Going back n forth in between character n being one. It's it you that you've fallen in luv? When vanity is claimed by the act of dying alive. When home is everywhere to find. Who's deeper than the image on display? Beneath the physical portrayal that is the betrayal needing to tamed. Has the inner makings awakened to the reality that differ from societies force of habit? Able to step back n become in depths of the beauty as you've nabbed it. Real has two versions here. What is it you truly feel? Aside from the shit show of sight. Can you understand this in the contents of your mind?

Realities eyes...

Guidelines keeping self from being seen. Living behind the restrictions of society forcing self to thy knees. To bow to a way of life. Forcing the same ol same buried into them mind. Orchestrated patterns mimicked to fit in. Knowing there's more in the depths within. As the show is a false sense of being real. Creating followers to repeat how to feel. Set in place is an illusion of what is free. Compressing breaths before the chest they leave. Don't be different is the point of no return. Losing who one is in a time where there's a lack of worth. Captured n imprisoned in every way. Vanity, finance, mindset, it's all a fuckin game. A useless thrill of acceptance bcuz people are taught not to be alone. Having a lingering from deep roam. Appearing to be just like everyone else. Catering to egos of fictional characters needing help. N to be on the outside looking in skeeters reality. As the individual takes notice in the in eventuality. Witness to one by one of those breaking away. Finding inner makings happier without fake smiles upon the face. Truly living in their own unique sense of comfort. In luv with the desire of wanting more...

The willing to live...

A need to live. A seek of what there is to give. Back to life. With the thrills day n night. Having actions in movements. Capturing every moment. Enjoying breaths taken. With nothing ever forsaken. N every possibility waiting. To decide a smile is self facing. Realizing it's not over until it the curtains close. Having worth. Knowing home is everywhere. Giving birds to what simply hasn't a care. Wanting to be. With the beauty of the comfort of a word like, me. As time spins for the chance to laugh a lil bit. Gaining through the years of touching lips. Finding friends. Going to the ends of the earth before laying down as energy has been doesn't. To do it all over again come mornings light. Deep into the late night vibes. Creating three memory in thoughts coming back around. Free from restraints is the use found...

Dream girl...

You're beautiful. But you'll never hear me tell you how deeply I'm attracted to you. N that's the saddest thing I've ever come to know. Oh how the heart fears the let down on the move When it comes to you. When it comes to you. Yeah, it's yet to happen bcuz you have no idea I have a thing for you. Who am I to interrupt your singlism at it's finest. No it's not a word but fuck me over you. I'm a bit too much n I'd hate to not be me. So I sit back n wait on the day another fella woos you. Someone a little more into giving you your way. All bcuz I to matter n have a reason to mingle with you. But I can't step up n speak n I dunno why. I'm trying to understand this whole thing about you. N how I just wanna reach for a response. To become that one person to you. N yet here I am letting the feeling go to waste. N damn me if I can't stop thinking about you. As even my dreams come to life even you're in them. Awakening me in a different world where I can't keep me from you. You're breathtaking to someone like me. Lost in this place where there's no I in you. Maybe if you knew than possibly the thoughts could find a way. I'm just scared to to lose the issue of you. N we haven't even began to start. Mainly bcuz your silhouette has no face n it's not your vanity I set in you...

Behind closed n locked doors...

Wait! It'll be worth it. Or it'll just sound good in your head until it's too late. With a lingering feel of it's all bs. Sitting around staring at materials that cannot interact. But at least you'll be established if they ever come along. Big facts. Either way life goes can you go wrong? It'll be peaceful ASF truly finding self. Rounding out to be someone to reckon with. Knowing in life you don't need help. But the gesture in time will be fulfilling to actually live. As long lonely nights when there's nothing to do creep on up. Depending on the patience to be in the moment in which you are. One day, one night, n repeated while holding out for likes to cling to luv. Telling emotion to settle down in the contents of the heart. As single as the mind can withstand a friend to appear. Losing the restraints to be as is n nothing less. Distant from hands wanting to touch the thrill of the vibe ever so clear. Never to look into eyes until that one can't resist the depths reaching for rescuing from the chest. That is if the comfort of the solitude doesn't get you first. Capturing the best of you behind closed n locked doors. With not one person ever to see the real truth of muted worths. As the linger soothes the beast from ever wanting anything more. But, wait! It'll be worth it. Or it'll damn you too the voices that have no sound that mimics a mate. Drifting in a world where the smile doesn't match the efforts of the ribs. Missing the chuckles that create a difference in the middle of life. But if the rush moves to fast then it's back to square one. Starting all over again for the last time. So it's fuck feeling numb. Stages of the outcome change self a little too much. As not just anyone gets to come inside. Trust, exploring lusts, laying flush, n ooh the gush. Asking does every level exist in a package on display for the mind? Opened to the known. Free but earned. With a sense of humor but fully grown. Waiting on a turn. In the cycle of getting lost somewhere in the elsewhere of, huh? Trying not to die before the best of what's remains isn't considered what's left. Having a new feel daily to regain the fun. To wait on another who simply says, yes!

If the choice was yours...

And what if it was you and I alone in a room. With nothing but life between the two of us wanting to live. Would you fight me off the way I would you? If the moment just happened to present a chance to come from within the minds wits. As we stare in silence for the wonder to speak. If there was a you and a me behind closed doors. Hearing heartbeats as breaths tell on the way we breathe. Or if there's a possibility that we'd give in to wanting more? And let's say we found ourselves together with no one else around. What do you believe you'd do if the choice was there? Standing before you as you in front of me. Bcuz my curiosity would be looking for a certain gaze in the eyes of playing fair. On this side of daydreams where neither of us can leave. With the locks that haven't a key to open to the escape. Who would I be to someone like you wasting away? In a situation searching for a way out. Having time spent too realize I have a use that's gone untamed. Like you, in the presence of just once, moving without sound. Trust me, I'd refuse you by all means just the same. Ignoring the fact that just maybe you're different as we'd be too proud. In the center of the universe where there should be a lit flame. The chill from cold hearts just may be the end. Before the beginning ever takes place. Bcuz we're unwilling to give up the peace chancing to get close another so called friend. As we'd prolly shy away from remembering each other's face. Tell me I'm wrong and avoid the scenario of you, with me. Somewhere without others lurking about. Able to decide for self if it be okay to set the burden free. To put all the fuckin weight down...