distinctive and pleasant...

it's in the smell that comes in their natural scent.

like a pheromone self cannot contest.

as lovely as one whiff tells the truth.

carried with a linger that comforts to the soothe.

it's their aroma as if a flower so alive.

guiding the nose to perfection's reasons of why.

to feel a sense of home worn like a fragrance that cost not a thing.

with a calming affect in a single sniff brings on cuddles wanting to cling.

to breathe them in and know who they are.

through their pores the longing reaches the heart.

as the crave rushes with the pulse.

wanting to taste the savoring so freshly raw.

nothing to believe in...

i can't remember what something real ever was. it's like i've never felt it accept my flaws. n yet, it could be i passed up on the wrong ones that reached for my chest. i can't recall one time the other end of life was met. being within relations has always been a roundabout way of things. like a revolving door spinning to let one out n another in. the memory slips on the thought of faces becoming a blur in the back of the mind. somehow i've cheated myself with decisions that created a possibility that never play out to my favor through time. seems moments weren't what they were when looking back. not one single friend ever stood their grounds as an enjoyment in the hand's grasp. all the reoccurences that fill drifting daydreams are struggles to coexist. everything gained has been empty materialistic nonsenses one needs to survive. n with every hello, there's a following of goodbye's. with blank pieces of self to put back in their rightful place. there's no recollection of luv in my face. jus a confusion set aside to live while i can before even i do not exist. n that in itself is the bare minimum of the twist...

yummy yum yum...

what if we just made a mess? like we couldn't get through making dinner without our luv confessed. with you and i becoming the appetizers. tossing everything in reach outta the way as we become the kitchen's survivors. with a lil flavoring added to the skin. tasted when licked from our grins. wanting a full serving of how the crave needs more. lifting you to the counter as your feet cannot touch the floor. damn near eating you like as if you're the dessert. sitting all juicy and shit only wearing a shirt. let's say we couldn't hold it together long enough to cook a good meal. would ordering in be objected to if passion ran loose as we fondled our way into a hurricane type feel? flinging anything that isn't us to the side. groping and gripping the intensity between the heart and the mind. having our way with wherever we wind up. creating a disaster so in sync it's beautiful to simply fuck. from the sink to the fridge to being spun around. as the mouth cannot stop from sucking to provoke moans coming from the inside out. getting dirty in every sense of the word. taking full advantage of hormones exploding, knowing we can be heard. with a bit of food here n there. thrown about like our clothing torn into a tare. all within the moment of two animals releasing true intent. heating up the room once turning on the vent. what if we grazed each other over by the stove? and it turned into a sexual fantasy where desired need not be roped. until we came to a still pause. laughing and smiling for a greater cause...

as one...

if consideration was a thing that allowed another to breathe. when the load of everyday could be eased. by accepting a friend that just wants to live. so the burdens of this world isn't a solo act rambled on babbling jibs. to speak with purpose n be felt in return. giving a partnership a reason to enjoy the finer things of worth. in a situation where financial struggles allow a better way to do more if wanted to. able to settle in to arms that wrap luv in an embrace to create a mood. doing everyday with another that's in it no matter what. having the openness of a lil thingy called trust. knowing ends are met without conflict. as each kiss sinks further n further into the texture of the lips. watching motions with an attraction that'll never end. as a hand to take a walk is opened to be more than lent. waking to mornings with the one person that'll be there every fuckin day. doing their part within relations to lay as still as the night once the sun goes around with the expressions upon the face. showing the pattern of the eyes when close enough to feel breaths. smiling while unable to get enough of someone willing to play respectfully with the contents that come from the chest. going in on every detail that it takes to have them around. helping each other obtain n sustain n escape on another level of what dreams drift away to. two as one as in the same of even differences are unique individuals just being self so things have a chance to be improved. claimed by the heart that doesn't ever wanna go without their presence. as bff's in their own connection without a single hesitance. making all n the above have a usefulness more valuable than living alone. finally in a position to with an equal to go home...

Figment of the imagination...

I'm really just a memory that's gonna get shuffled in the mind from time to time. A moment paused for a lil while as time slips away from the feel of life. A drift midday is how I'm remembered to be. In a lineup of everything that never makes it to the now other than in daydreams. If I even make the cut worth the thought to take a few seconds to recall. All in all I'm no one special for I won't last past the stall. When everything changes n the chance to become comfort fades through the years. I'll remain in pieces set aside that no longer shed a tear. An afterthought that comes n goes periodically that's unwanted to say the least. I'm a blink n poof, I'm gone bcuz for me there is no need.

stubborn n unfair...

every time. the makings fall short of a happy life. with the tongue never allowed to speak on truths. damn the feelin of a real use. attempting to know someone n looking for a reason to stay. but it's always stepping away. n by golly if pieces of self ain't held from the lips wanting to speak. with the head shaking at the edge of the ease. looking down at the wtf landing me in a state of not again. in the coming of i just wanna forget about the intent of plans. getting to the good shit just isn't the way it is. as those as of lately has had more than a worth that fell to my own twist. n al that words could ever want is to tell them yes. here sits the loner in disbelief of the the breakdown consider to a fuckin mess. to cross the line would be something that just might have no return. n the mind is determined to override the hearts lessons it's forgotten it's learned. oh how the stick was a thing that was felt to keeping a few around. all in their own had an angle that had me going back for more. n yet, the end was a situation in the so long that went without them knowing the ache in my core. back to basic steps of hey with someone new. saying the same ol shit like the memory wanted to cut ties with the comfort of who was let loose. the nonsense isn't for the emotion to choose but it sure insists on showing up in the aftermath. as yesterday becomes today really super fast. forcing decision to be more sensitive to giving others a real chance by keeping to the definite no no's. n that's what's gotten this fool sitting without a friend in an empty room. missing the point of consideration that they're as human as the one in the mirror always calling it quits. just to chuckle with a fuck, just wanting to live. in the arms of a good woman able to be with her own lil flaws. as daydreams drift of the day mometns are hung upon the wall....

Peep...

There's a stare they'll be in that'll tell you everything you need to know  n as quick as it comes it'll go with the rolling of eyes. Like days that don't last forever the look is short lived. Having a limit to the thrill witnessed by the heart with so much to give. N if self isn't aware the difference of passerbys n real intent it'll hurt. Fit years with transforming faces in the mind the wonder shall consume thoughts. Trying to find a set of eyes that have that fire. With a crave nibbled from a lip that series nerves never to expire. There's a listing of self in another that occurs when sight zones in to the design of retinas. Awakening the pulse as of a candle lit to see chuckles laugh with a... Giggle that amplifies in the chest as the thumping beats. Hoping never to see tears that weep. As in the contact a smile lifts intent to limbo to the music playing the melody from within. Coming to terms with why the wait was worth the wish.

Walking lips...

From your cheek to your ear, down your neck and back up to your chin. Tasting your lips is the creation of the thrill I get when I walk my kiss upon your skin. Like steps on their own journey feeling every pitter patter from the heart. Creeping slow the crave intensifies from such a sculpted work of art. As I can feel the heat of my own breath crawl back upon my face. Being that close to you is damn near insane. Knowing what you could do to me just by cracking a smile. You're a rush of pure intensity rising to the surface with expressions wanting to live. Taking in your features as my sights linger in awe. Your beautiful in every sense of being perfectly flawed. Pulling me in to go deeper as tongues dance for a few. Oh the passion in the act is more than enough to want a lifetime of sighs on the loose. The taste of your sweat and the nibbling of you lip. The adrenaline alone is enough to make my suck on our skin. Passionately gripping at every inch of you. Mmm, the flavor of you juice. Pouring from your body as we gravitate in motion. Having one desire, to to end up in complete devotion. With smoochies from head to toe. And in the act of making out and allowing the intensity to flow. Time doesn't exist nor here nor there. As neither of us even fuckin care...

In disbelief...

The wonder itself is curious to know. How does it feel to have someone look at you without looking through you. Like there's no one else to be seen. N to have it last as self is free to loosen to the thrill of the way bodies move. Thoughts trigger questions never known. Poking at what the heart has believed is what luv is about. Just to feel it dissipate with time leading then out the door. As the head shakes off issues memories never said aloud. The wander halts the feet roaming to settle for a bit as lips ask for answers.  With the eyes opening up to witness the truth for once come from a friendly tongue. Specifically attempting to remove the confusion lingering beneath the surface. Why does it never wind up in self's favor to be entangled with the sizzle of the rush?

always on my mind...

coming outta the shower. smelling the scent of perfume of u as if your pheromones over me has powers. linger down the hall i go. into the room where you're laying all alone. there u are! ready to make a few moves on my abled heart. as one blink is all it takes n you're no longer here. damn my imagination runs with the thought of you behind me in the mirror. just to turn around n i'm standing still looking like a fool. so i try not to spin your way when suggest i look at the way u move. how am i to tell u no? so i give u your way n turn to watch your remove your shirt n you're gone again. n there's nothing but walls listening to my silliness rambling on. wishing u were upon the bed the way i visualize u with a smile fully awake. waiting on me to join your presence for your patients has been calmly stretch on your pretty face. as when i drop the towel n hit the lights to feel u close. somehow you've escaped into the night as sighs whisper a whoa. in the empty space i do one quick reach to see if u just moved. but the thrill fades from my fingertips calling a truce. with the gripping of the pillow n rolling over just for u to chuckled behind me. every night it's the same ol' thing of u appearing to leave. no matter how the crave clings to the sight of you looking cute as fuck. coming back come morning right before i head to work feeling salty wanting your luv.. you don't call n never text. maybe you're just in my head. it's possible i've lost my mind just a lil in the middle of the game i 'm willing to play. so if you would, next time, stay. you don't havta disappear prior to giving us a chance. as we pull each other close being hand in hand. as i open my eyes to find i was lost in another daydream. will it ever be?

Let it be what it is...

Cut, straight the fuck off. Hold ya ground but don't cross that line. My emotions don't wait around to be lingering in a fuckin pause. Half step me n imma flex. Bye bye quick without hesitation. Do if you're going on I'm coming up from under as a demonstration. Until you go flipping off at the gums on don't I'll I ain't good enough shit. Snip snip go get u a sucker waiting on the same ol bs. From u I could never do once u get sidetracked away from who were are. It'll vamoose the day I decide to play with my heart. Walking on it like u have that right? I can show u better than I can tell u that I don't need u in my life. I'm not the magnet to the wrecking ball u that's clamped to your ankle. We don't belong if your attacking me from different angles. Imma study u before I every get a chance to flip on me. N I'll dare u to pull your game out as I leave. No ties, no strings can hold me down. If u want some real shit ya better watch that falls outta your mouth. Playing I'm not as I'll encourage u to do better after I'm gone. That way u never come back talking about how u was wrong. Forever faded into a blur your face I won't remember.  Snuffed life s clown from the makeup thinking we'll ever get back together. I lack the give a fuck it takes if u do not know. Not I'll be good to u of your friendship is willing to grow. So tell me not what I think I wanna hear. I don't believe shit but time that whispers in my ear. Know your place m I'll do the same. But if I havta turn n walk away, I don't ever wanna see you face. Friend or for determines on how u go about me in your sights. We can get it in or let the feeling die. It's your choice of what you become to me. N if I'm not out, I'll didn't you from my dreams. No head space will every be fixing to such a hought. So come at me if u will not that I know I ain't soft. As harsh as your own intent done away with just bcuz fuck u too. I'll shake u loose. I'm not gonna sit around babysitting what could if been if the betrayal is what it is. Your name will meet again come from my lips for u simply will not exist. But at that point I need not ask did I ever to u. Wisely removed...

The flow...

Holding on to time like water slipping through my hands. What I cannot seem to catch evaporates again n again. N all I'm trying to do is to see if luv truly exists. But like the rain it comes n goes with every drip. As different storms roll through with variables of chaos along the way. Bringing depths with altering meanings to slide down the face. From the drowning to the swim of the backstroke the floating will always be. It's insane to stay in one place for very long other than in ones own dreams. For one cannot luv a frozen stiff. Nor melt the solid form of an icy heart for anything more than a quench of the lips. N even that leaves the body like years running their coarse. The touch dries out in dehydrated palms wanting the moisturize the grin as emotions in between partners create a reason to explore. To taste each drop of sweat so the flavor of another is known. All prior to the thirst returning to the tongue needing a down pour of hope...

To give in...

To matter is to fall back away from self. To allow another to feel contents without guilt. As conversations doesn't speak of the solo act. Yet believing in a cause that is consistent with the facts. To be someone with specifications other than to self on the defense. Having a purpose on the outside looking in to the reasons that make no sense. Knowing luv isn't a emotional suicidal fear that overwhelms the use. Awakening from a sleep that imprisons worth is to adjust to the proof. As eyes open to precision willing to accept how to live again. With a better sense of determination allowed to flow so smoothly it settles nerves in the hands. To be steady n calm for the gripping of truths held loosely. Like a grope feeling on something as real as depths moving. To be that factor to another that stands corrected in their own. For self is as is with eyes that can show intent reviving the hidden treasure buried in the shallows of the shore. To become the beach with a sunrise that falls with the horizon come dawn. Believing they were out there all ain't...

Alert n aware of who I am...

As quick as the tongue can be too tell someone to fuck the fuck off. Laughs rise from a chuckle thinking the shits funny as they consistently chase luv. Claiming to have a need for a friend they haven't met. Birds on both hands find humor in the attachment flung from the chest. As the digging isn't for just anyone to shovel the depths from within. Funny is the character believing I'm the same ol go along with their endless fake grin. Oh the stories that rack up are plenty in full of something to learn from. N to watch em try to get away from what the dark cannot see is a sight I can as beat on the drum. Pounding inches into the mind that switched up on the release ranting more. But yet, intent isn't too hurt but to one by one see if they have it in them to expose their true core. With a decision to flip the switch on or off. I'm not shy for either way to adjust to the makings of like prior to luv. In a info needed scenario where time tells which wave to swim. I'm not for the fuckery of the same ol bs in which ever other hopeless romantic lives. I'm as fast as they come with the turning off a cheek bcuz I can't do the fake smiles. That aimed in my direction to change my mindset instead of relating to who it is I am worth the while. Like lighting I redirect my presence into the unknown once truths are known. I'm not a player but I realist that insists on the good life just wanting to go home. I'll dismiss any n all that demand me to be anything less than who it is I've come to know. Bcuz of it's too be I'd rather be totally fuckin alone. Although it's the affection I crave that never comes with what I need to open up. Too be is to live n see where days wind up never trying to purposely cause pain to another's rush. Due to I get the the be reasonings that are tucked behind me the lip wanting to speak out loud. Attempting to get to me somehow as I'm one step ahead of the malarkey holding my ground. I'm no fool to the game even though I'm willing to witness someone come along n spark a crave. As I awaken to the pulse of middle fingers lowering to the realization of a purpose to commit to a friendly face. I'm nothing special but I have me n that's all I know. Until the ease comes along to loosen up the details I protect from the desperation of hope. I'm a lil more with it than to give in to the basics of another not knowing ones own worth. I'm on some other shit that's evolved from the every other goof losing the fight bcuz the heart cannot think before it begins to sputter n spurt. One step ahead n laying back I'm not wanting to be seen for there's too many eyes lurking about. With a giggle that disrupts a vibe demanding to sync with my own melody to create a sound. N as it would be nice to find a rhythm with someone genuine I cannot resist, I feel I'm on my own. Awaiting the moment where when the turning of the away isn't a possibility slowed.

I want you...

I just wanna fuckin touch you. Sexually intriguing me is what you do. To feel you close enough for me to enjoy. I loosen to the thrill to fulfill the void. Sensual motivating is the crave with the way you move. I'm addicted with an attraction n a uncontrollable appreciation for your curves. I want you naked n willing to let me play with your worth. It'll be my pleasure to serve you in the moment of us. I'm eager to express myself through consistent thrusts. To hear your moans call to me not to stop. As passion drives my kink to push limits to bring you out. Adapting to the way I drop to my knees n taste you with my mouth. Mmm, how my pulse spikes thinking of kissing on your body like I could never stop. Licking your from back to front as you're bent over leaning in to my face buried in your orgasms as you pop. Grr, the feeling I get just looking at your skin. The way you intensify desires sucking on you lips. Satisfied I am to admit it's you that triggers my hormones. Adjusting I am to the makings of luv rolling with the escaping tones. Ooooh, say my name as I lost myself in your sighs clinging to me head. I wanna hear you as you come undone laying in my bed. Finding comfort to speak your legs for the compassion of my tongue to slide. Nice n slow as your breathing intensifies. Hips rotating to the swivel going on down between your thighs. Back arching n fingertips digging into me as you come to life. The imagery excites me in ways I cannot deny the to dominate you. To show you it's ok to give in n submit to me eating your woos. As I pause to collect myself in disbelief. Damn, if the sight of you doesn't give me an escape wanting to be relieved. To insert my girth deep inside of your depths. Until my skills fulfill your needs dripping wet. Falling in luv with every second of our night as we go. I can't help but to define you as home...

to live again...

the deeper the luv the more distant the fall will tare the heart from the chest. losing more than luv at the top of giving all of self just to swim within the mess. weight drags emotions by sweet spots that were never meant to feel such pain. n the dig lasts forever as the attempt to remove the thrill doesn't wanna hate. the twist that evolves from such a good thing changes the inner makings building metaphorical walls hiding the throne. as the linger goes on n on for some time bcuz it meant more than they will ever know. having that one that no one will ever compare to is a belief that will fade if allowed. with a thought that sticks in the head claimed by memories never forgotten. to resurrect the remains for a better day to come n remind the smile that they were only a step as self was softened. showing a human beneath the texture that transforms to live again. it's the beauty of the art of healing n learning just bcuz it can....

Are you real?

What is it you're looking for? Is there a something in the way of wanting something more? A silhouette, a souvenir or a simpleton? What is it you want?  What is that in your eyes staring in my direction? i'm getting leary n a think I need protection. The familiarity of it feels like home n I don't know why. What is it you seek in my sigh? Honestly, for some reason it's as if you'd wish I'd stick around. Somehow actually wanting to feel me out. Maybe I'm seeing things, idk. It's just when you say my name, I don't feel so alone. There's a strangeness of the sound lingering by your choice. But I cannot understand why you make such noise. I've noticed something I just cannot pinpoint thus far. Maybe you don't realize you're doing it or you're trying to leave a mark. I can't piece it together. Am i supposed to be more than a luv'r? I believe that look is having its way with me trying to figure it out. stop it now. Truthfully, it appears you could use someone like me n idky. It's possible I'm reading u wrong n it's ok if you'd rather end this night. I just may be avoiding what hasn't even crossed your mind. As I'm trying to look away before you see me trying to hide. Yeah, the shit's scary asf. But damn if you don't remind me of the feeling i lost back when I believed in luv. It's strange like a stranger I've always known. But the distance between us is for actions to be shown. Or maybe I'm tripping on the thought because of the visual that isn't real. As my imagination brings you to life so i too can feel...

That dark place...

Forward shadowing back then. Sitting still. Rocking. Looking back. Heads shaking. It's not stopping. Repeating, all I remember are the walls. All I remember are the walls. All I remember is thinking about what's to come. Holding off on life. Stagnant. The nothing owned me there. No memories to claim. Stuck to nothing like a magnet. Hearing whispers chant, all I remember are the walls. All I remember are the walls, all I remember...

Gotta get up. Do something. Make it worth it. Loosen up. Get out. Live. As the gibberish taunted me, I wanted feel alive, I wanna feel alive, I wanna feel. With a fading future. There must be a way. Losing the me that was so pure. People are fake. Whispering to self  it's all for nothing. I don't feel the same. As the gibberish never lies when alone. As the gibberish speaks freely. The gibberish needed to leave me alone...

Utilizing the whole package...

If you're looking to save me from myself, don't. N if your expecting me to reciprocate the same gesture, I won't. Taking self away doesn't change who we are. Yet free to be could do wonders for the heart. Giving it a nudge to witness its response.  Damn near reviving the pulse to awaken for reconnaissance. I wouldn't stop you from touching what your curiosity wants to know. It could just be the crave in which I myself have waited too show. It's better to add to the makings eyed cannot see than to turn inside out. The comfort of comprehending such composure is as attractive as lips physical attributes tasted by the mouth. To get is to get closer enough to where context never becomes flush. Arousing pleasures on all levels into a handlebars of luv. Where the mind rests is where the heart will follow until there's nothing left to access. As it creeps away with thoughts as it wanders to be found at best. So to be emptied by saving by self from self just isn't something that intrigues me. We must be who we are n not a false sense of our own realities. Reinvent ourselves before like we're not good enough for the moment to share us together n with. Just live and adapt to new beginnings awaiting your bliss...

front...

i get why you feel you havta do it all by yourself. nothings ever worked out in your favor n you've never truly been felt. damn, don't ask me how i know. just trust a stranger when i relate to the feeling of being alone. as strength comes from somewhere within. like some sorta miracle that forces a calm as if you've never belonged to where you've ever been. i can comprehend the feeling of drifting through life n making the best of things. seems that consists of wondering from time to time of why we get trapped in dreams. moving a lil different than a past time when the heart was free to play. if you don't havta count on anyone, there's no way you'll ever lose again. as if that's fair game for the mind to have that kinda control over emotions being banned. thoughts go astray in the mix of whispering fuck luv. the secrets behind closed doors aren't as foreign as you'd think for i understand the definition of a crutch. leaning inward to where no one can see you banging on your inner chest to escape. pretending it's all cool for there's nothing left to give to another so called friendly face. as the lie can't even look you in the eyes as your reflection appears here n there. n stop me if i'm wrong but you're lingering in depths wanting to surface to rise just one more wave until you're fantasies are bared. but i won't expose you hiding what this you've shoved down beneath where anyone can reach. i'll just gather the rest of my words n leave...

Rhetorically elicit...

If you were somehow buried in smile, what would my face mean to someone like you? N if I was to took away your access to me, would you mind if I cit you loose? Once you've gotten used to me being around everyday like we'd never part. As you couldn't get to with the backlash of the harsh heart chard with venomous remarks. Who would I become if I felt toy weren't my type after the mingling had begun? Maybe a mongrel in your eyes you believed in with the rush of luv. Will I be that monster that haunts your nights when I'm nowhere to be found. As you can hear your own breaths come to life in a twisted sense of ouch. Do you think about the day I say goodbye as I disappear back into this world? No longer claiming you as a friend nor exploring the comfort of you used to being girl. If I knew what was wrong with why you and I could never go the distance we seek. N I told you truthfully if rather do my own thing and set myself free. How would you feel in the end of us holding on by yourself with time at stake? And how long before the pain let's go will you get the helping back in your face?  Knowing it wasn't shit to remove your from my everyday fuckin day. Would you wind up bitter and hating the sound on my name? Looking at someone else as if they're gonna abandon you the same exact way I did. I get it, but of we don't tell well never live!

Weightless interaction...

Leave your bad habits at the door and come on in. Have a seat as the real you without all the weight spreading you thin. Just feel the vibe on my true intent wanting to talk. It's ok to relax for a bit so we can ease into a pause. Even if words need not doing sound as we sit in the silence as friends. Loosening to the comfort creating a will to behave so it's a win win. Bring yourself to seeing me with you eyes closed. As mine shut to know you in a deeper sense without desperation of hope. In a moment that'll come to an eventual pass of clarity as an as is. Simply be n and leave when your ready to get back to the live you live. You're free to choose the flow in which you come and go. Like breeze lingering into my life on your way home. I'm just me willing to speak or hear you out maybe it's you day or wants and needs that seek a conversation. Reason with me as we relate to each other to allow the spark of a new sensation. Able to come from within and show a stranger the human side of us. Triggering a like if at all possible to be seen in true form awaiting all and the above to accept the creation of a crush. Rare and raw and bared to the sound of a voice pulsating with the heart. Silencing the irritation of flags flapping in the winds of alarms...

Unveiling the Vail...

Words of war transform from the betrayal of luv's pour. Overfilling the chalice for the battle to begin. Just pay limits of hope to make it through. Someone hasta lose for the game to live. Bitter lips drip in the ends of passion fading away. Weaponizing emotions for future claims reaching for an answer of their own. The resistance creates humor to adapt to strangers yet to awaken from dreams. As armor is warn to absorb blows swung from tongues on the loose as proof of another foe. Ready is the warrior brave enough to engage as self on the rise. Clashing in heart to heart combat that creates space to evolve. Going the reigns to ride without company until alliances form to be true. With a mentality that doesn't conflict with a resistance to come slowly to a halt. Making nights burn raging fires as a decoy to lure enemies away. Protecting the valley within from higher grounds gained. So the opening at the gate doesn't create another battleground waiting it's turn. As the drawbridge is lowered from the inside to only those that can comprehend there's no need to fight for worth...

Free me...

I don't want it.

Cut me open, rip it loose, tare it out.

You can take it.

Save it, feel it, tell it what you've found.

Sink in to the fake shit.

Keep it, caress it's ego, burn it down.

Don't taste my lips.

With a twisted kiss, get away, the pressing isn't aloud.

I can't take it 

Make a slit, reach on in, clean me out.

I don't like it.

It's all yours, for the taking, take it now.

The luv fades quick.

Use it fast, feed on the pulse, spew venom from thy mouth.

Pluck out the roots.

Dig in, get your hands dirty, stems from the ground.

Watch it move.

Play the wiggle, finger fuck it, listen to the ouch.

I call a truce.

From the inside out, pulled from depths, hoe me down.

Get a good look.

Chopping at the bits, piece by piece, ounces to pounds.

It doesn't belong in here.

Grab n tug, free me, the heart is done with the bow.

Kill it n let me live.

I need new, a release, the escape of wow.

Ten prints landing within.

Double stuffed, emptied by you, removing the clown...

Patiently waiting...

Confidence appears to be a weakness in the eyes of those that cannot get in. As a defensive word or to about being broken is muttered into the wind. Seems when one is during enough to go at life alone is not seen as a individual done with the shenanigans. Rather it's gazed upon as a fear that doesn't allow the beholder to live again. The rejection tells on others who wanted the chance to become not just another face. The falling away speed their remarks of belittlements aimed at the corrections within self they haven't an idea of standing at gates. Yeah the shit gets lonely but damn if judgements don't eat up n accept they just ain't the one. It's a no harm no fowl situation where feelings arrive to the scene too soon for depths to go with the rush. Willingness hasn't a thing to do with just anyone will do when flying solo. Vibes have frequencies that attach themselves to anything from the crave or a fuck no. N only one had the capabilities to dig on without a resistance applied. N yet pack of comprehension to the facts had passerbyers walking away with hurts faces knowing reasons of why. Although self isn't out to mislead so the confusion is theirs in the making of they feel less than what they're worth. As their side of the interaction is more than considered at they're heard. Resulting with an arsenal or vernal suggestions that poke at a past self is no a part of. N the thought comes to mind  that what would they say later on in the unwinding to get to know them if  there was an actual touch of luv. Decisions claim moments that make or break the clinging of bodies come nightfall. As they retreat back into the world to gather themselves for another to find with an, at last.

Slow and easy...

Move slow with the emotion so it doesn't spread so fast. Wildfires are know to cause chaos as memories get chard into a past. Like stromg winds pushing the moment into the future that never lasts. Feeling the grip hold its own just to be released from sizzling grasps. With burning bridges that are metaphorical to rise from the blaze. Lingering in the phase that creates a so called new face. Expressing prior features inviting the same ol gestures as welcoming of hate. Slowly but quicker than expected as the losing of another friend the mind fights to eventually escape for to endless mistakes. There's no need in enemies drifting in luv's capture due to passion forgets about the compassion of thought overlooked. Overriding comprehension lost from the ignition that sparks the chance took. As hope becomes desperation just wanting to smile so long can continue on the positive side of rewriting self's own book. Nice easy will avoid the confusion that protects sacred heartbeats that need not be shook.

Something simple...

And what if a fella doesn't wanna go out. Let's say staying in n cooking with a side of chatting is more like it. Just wanting to see the real you in action. Putting aside this world for a few. In a real situation to see if the flow can move. Leaving the house of false resorts outside where they belong. Attempting to witness how the evening lingers along. Maybe even sit outback n have a cold one or two. Simply too ease back so the mood can be the proof. Either at your place or mine. Taking a break from the wonders of life. Allowing self to be seen in rare form. As the connectivity responds to how smiles are worn. Feeling the soothe settle nerves for a bit. With something that truly isn't too extravagant. Jus you n I relating face to face. Hoping there's a next time bcuz I don't wanna stay to late. Would you believe time is patient if you saw it with your own eyes? There's no rush bcuz all good things will eventually come to life. So what if a fella just wants to get to know the real you? Are you willing to be seen as is so you know who's who?

Strangers friends n old flings.

There will forever be someone else who's better for them. Whether you play the role for a lil while or step away, you're just there to allow them to vent. No matter the belief in the brief moment that is soon to pass. The day will come to turn s new page where your existence isn't a piece of their lives n it moves so fast. One can either play it safe n keep the heart from the pain yet to consume the facts or consider digging back in. Encountering another suicide mission that becomes a replica of every other that comes to go with a grin. No one's truly looking the one within when seeking a friend to drift in time with. It'll be short lived in which they all have a limit they're willing to give. It's harsh to accept alone is a better way to be than to endure the failures with a filter over they turn for the worst. Losing another that said they'd stick around but fell shy of the promise that hurts. Just to witness a new set of eyes that will sooner than later look at another the way they do with every other relationship. Kissing sighs from lips that mean nothing in the long run of pet names given that sounds exactly the same as laughs tickled from the ribs. As life continues the cycle until the body rests to escape it all. Into a different kinda whole where the torture cannot fall...

Stagnant...

Past the point of thoughts consistently over thinking. Over the facts that the social scene is all about the drinking. The fading has gone so far into the shadows thy face is only seen in pictures captured by selfies. N the smile hides a deeper sense of worth lingering without a cause to help thee. The heart wants life that the mind shields it from. Damn confliction of interests feels like a war fought in the throat that's being hushed. As the body is leaving towards being felt better it has no soak left to feed desires. The inner makings are a neverending blaze wildfire smoking that will not simmer no matter how tired. There's a line where the toes rest as eyes await the day it's crossed n life can go on. Prior to what's left behind as it's begin the mourn. Stagnant n self oppressed the battle is a moment of breaking free. Days are pulling intent near a connection that had nothing to do with hopeless dreams. That give meaning back to the reality of opening up to a movement that soothes truths. Distant from the crossfire buried between the head n chest to gain the rapture of luv...

The wonder of why...

Appearance brings out jealousy in others judging as if self has a line up of favoritism. They're always worried about who likes who as a self defense mechanism. Not knowing their false statements are a hypocritical unattractiveness. Showing they still haven't gotten over their past or assume foolishness. Seems they can't just mind their own as filth leaps from their mouths. Only if they could hear themselves speak irritating sounds. Bringing others into a situation they need not partake in. Trust isn't something found too often as fake smiles grin. Hiding intent of belief in the tone disguised as a friend. But the fuse ignites on the mentions of others creating a beginnings of the end. They fear there's someone else lingering in the playbook so they belittle opposing women. N they wonder why they aren't taken seriously by men. As it's repeated by every single one that comes along. Missing the point of no one else matters when two people come to a pause...

Back then forth...

When the mind recalls self before the chaos that crippled the heart. Prior to the memory of that one person that you've allowed life to become so hard. As a past time comes to the front lines of better times. N the smile recreates the remembrance of a younger self so alive. Back when free meant to do more bcuz there's so much to learn n see. It's then is where you'll gather the pieces of everything forgotten n lost in dreams. Every little detail will remind you that they'd live still to live. Just by going on reverse to dig up what has been buried inside. Giving a reason to do it all over again with a better understanding of why. So tap in n time out until you feel like your again. All bcuz you can...

Lonely sensation...

Scenario after scenario that never evolve into a single situation. Written in lines depicting certain imitations. As if illusions gathered are to tell a story of realities mutation. Delusions unscrambled in the mind find a voice that never speaks with a volumes vibration. Even though every letter defines the relative satisfisfaction. Having a different kinds sensation that berets self as words flow into rotation. Life an investigation goin on within to reach out with a comprehensive communication. Thoughts fall into place when the findings settles for a better understanding wanting more than another nullification. As live rotates in circles while sitting in as still at patience's deliberation. Wasting time diddling around simply too correct the inner makings that crave gratification. So the claim of hearts is as mental as emotions that rise to the occasion of syncing operations. Defining they moments it takes to tweak out the details needing an evaluation. As adventures wait to be shared with what lifts the eyes up to see eutopia's final destination. No longer having to scribble down the attractions that makes self appealing  without dementia's dimension of retraction. Able to keep memories gained as the ranble continues to land here as a demonstration. There's no feeling in expressions yard aren't capable of living past a state of hibernation. Sleeping while alive as if the idle is stuck in a cycle shielded by the saturation. N I'm guilty by my own association...

Can you recall?

When's the last time you've made luv? The kind that doesn't turn into a gradual fuck. Do you remember how deep the emotion comes from when breaths begin to speed up? As the pulse syncs to another moving to the rhythm of hearts about to bust. How longs it been since you've felt a slow unwinding of moans escape from within you? Feeding a luv'r the sound of perfection as purpose goes into strokes going woo. Using to pause from the intensity of the moment livening up you mood. Just to gasp from a single taste bud sliding across that one nerve that works you loose. Can you recall the passion reaching for more than the flesh kissed and teased. As each finger touched with precise elegance that speak to intent whisper , yes please! Having a raw compassionate interest clinging to desires will to play. When's the last time someone made you cry in such a great way truths leak down your face?

twinkle twinkle...

With that how in the fuck did I find you look in your eyes. Get on over here and touch me with that fulfillment that brings meaning to my life I like that share when I turn around and your all over me with a visual hmm. I'm not gonna lie bcuz when your don't looking I feel a hunger of mmm. Let's see if there's more to the physical attractions that can't help but to be seen. And give the night something to see about as well create an entanglement of got and I in a never deleted scene. Come get some of the candy you wanna taste upon you tongue. I'll meet you halfway to collide center stage with you going to your hand so luv. Hesitations won't give the moment the same clarify like if we just land somewhere in the middle of life. Ale to watch movements throughout days to come like we can't get enough of us playing like kids that's open to a new reason for of why. Put me to use bcuz I have something in mind as soon as you step my way. Oh the joy that I'll feel if we ever get past this flirtation that had claimed your face. Do you and witness how I got me reciprocating the interest that bubbles the lip. And honestly it'll only take a few seconds to lean into our very first kiss. Come and get it of you want the package that needs you to unwrap it on any which way you like. Shedding clothes is an art when bodies give in to hormones rushing to the skin felt that cannot hide. With that sigh you get when your sight is stoned in my direction. Just know I get out to but mine congress with a gimme gimme type of erection. We can play and lay around until morning and accept the fact that ever found the missing rarity that lasts. I'm right there with you as I help you to never let me pass. Saying to remember the design on your eyes as I tare down my walls. Enticing else will wait it you choose to pause. I'm right here noticing you in a crave the way I do you. If we walk away you know we both lose...

Your choice...

Believe it or not there fact remains that we do not havta go through with this. We can skip all the feelings that get messy along the way to wondering where the friendship went. Bypassing the tension of yet another failed attempt to please a selfish luv gone astray. It's not too late to walk away people to the pain settling into the betrayal that vents. At can live to enjoy life instead of having to repair everyone dragged through the trenches like we cannot get though of the feel seasoning time n patience for what lasts longer than a poof. Yeah the memories will never be made but the clarity will shine on beyond reasons never spoken. As we'd never touch the sensitivities in n outta the bed but then again we'd never fall in to fall through silhouettes. Like shadows in the dark. Giving other possibilities the opportunity to create a spark within someone what chosen. Follow my thoughts n imagine all the bs we'd bypass if we'd just not pretend to care. They'd be no bitterness to speak negatively about each other whatsoever now or in the futures then. We could just smile n walk away from the inevitable waiting it's turn to cripple us at will. Or, we can be real with who we are n step up to an honest chance for something that's rarely gained...

One life to live...

Do you wanna stay locked up in your head forever or do you wanna live? Being shackled to the walls beyond closed doors is where fools exist. How is it you'd rather run outta time than free yourself from yourself? Allowing life to pass your by bcuz you're afraid to be felt. Is it you've given up on the feel of will to be? Bcuz there's so much more yet to do while you're hiding from the need to truly breathe. Have you forgotten how depths have a certain tingle that moves the smile? Creating a different sense of joy that refuses to remain in exile. How is it you linger knowing who in the fuck you really are? Having a use to do more than dream of better days that cripple the heart. Are you seriously gonna sit around as memories are to be made? You can't be that far gone as to enjoy the emptiness displayed upon your face. Who is it you've become in those moments you took to gather the pieces to put you back together again? Take a glance in the mirror n accept what you see if you can...

Here I am...

There's no hate to be found n my trenches. I've search to the end of the edges. Turned around within n dug me up. I haven't a single grain of animosity put on hush. I'm free from the weight that doesn't control me. Loosened to the feel of life n living the dream. I move differently since I've changed. Once I figured out only I can disrupt my face. There's no drift that lingers within. Jus a patience that awaits beneath the skin. Chains have deteriorated in time's lag. N here I am with room in my heart putting down the white flag. Easy living has settled my nerves. Giving a peacefulness to emotions so the mind isn't overworked. I have me as I now can open up. Yet to find another at peace with self enjoying the rush. Knowing to give is to be complete before relations begins. Having no distractions so luv can live... 

Wonder wanders...

Crazy about me isn't something that ever lasts. But the curiosity still exists to remove masks. As the wonder wanders on how far another is willing to go. Met in the middle life wanting to go home. With someone who can't seem to ever get enough. Sharing a raw blend of truths that creates a trust. Bonding n living together as foreheads land on one each other. All in with whatever it takes to feel luv'd by a friend n a luv'r. Never to change the mind's free will to be the one. Outright falling further into a truce n having fun. Smiling like the cheesiest grins never sleep. With a comfort that feeds the heart its need. Getting the best of both worlds combined to throw in on life. As every dusk listens to lips saying goodnight...

Raw intent...

When the heart demands to come back to life. As the well overdue wait has never to crossed the line. N emotions stand firm on not wanting to die alone. Forcing a change in the delivery of tone. When the mind collaborates knowing desires must live. As a never spoken understanding tickles the ribs. N a sigh released relieves deep hidden wants. Creating a chance for self to be with more than luv. When the inner makings come to the surface. As escaping is what it'll havta be that is better than feeling worthless. N all or nothing no longer begs n pleads. Bcuz it's ones own that is ready to please. When the determination reveals truths allowed to be exposed. As rare form awaits a touch that feels like home. N there's nothing left to let go of. There's a crave of another wrapped up in arms so there's no sense in being lost...

Like this...

I'll it like this. So you can hear it before it's all over with. At end of this ride, your still gonna be on my mind. As I go on living my life. Still remembering you in a past time. Not to keep you attached so you're always there. I just want to tell you that I do care. I'll say it like this. To bring to light the feeling of your lips. You're someone to miss n that's no lie. Even though the situation will not allow me to claim you as mine. Even though it was how you touched me made me that made me sigh. As relief came over me prior to me saying goodbye. As I now follow days that don't seem fair. Daydreaming of the moments that made us a pair...

Waiting...

If you never make into words for the world to read. As a story untold bcuz the memories don't even have a chance to leave. As they're not once made for a smile to rise. If you somehow go unfound know I've kept a place for you in my mind. To allow the heart to crave the moment you come along. For a place within me to forever belong. But if you're simply absent here as your lost in someone else's arms. Know imma waiting even if I live alone just to awaken to every mornings alarm. With a new day moving swiftly above. Holding on to nights that just might spark the luv. Though if you aren't able due to you don't know who I am, it's ok. I'll still wear a smile for you upon my face. Just in case you see me out n about whenever you go. You'll know it's me for I'll be the one who feels like home...

No fucks given...

No passion, no pity.

No thirst, but oh so pretty.

No shits, no hope.

No chasing, there's no going home.

No like, no luv.

No interest, fingertips never reach for the touch.

No give, no chance.

No win, no emotions enhanced.

No want, no need.

No trust, sighs never breathe.

No reason, no kiss.

No point, only leaves lonely lips.

No fling, no tomorrow.

No wakey, there's nothing but sorrow.

No drift, no find.

No trying, one lives an empty life...

Creating a friend...

I pretend there's someone next to me. I don't feel alone with an imaginative dream. A friend that doesn't like to get involved with the world. I make believe I have a girl. I don't know what she looks like n I don't even know her name. But the comfort of believing she's near brings a smile to my face. N I may be going for a loop on the coocoo train but I'm content. She doesn't twist my emotions against me nor care of other men. I created her outta thin air as she doesn't really exist. As her absence tickles my ribs. I think she's here n I sleep all night. N when I awake she's just at work so I get on with life. It's a creepy way to hide behind locked doors. Even worse that my heart has much to give n then more. As I tell myself there's no place like home. Knowing damn well I lost all purpose of hope. So I made up a twisted reality that calms my nerves. As I lay in bed beside no one but a thought losing my worth. But oh how the ache has left me be. I have a false presence that sets me free. A silent mute that never talks a peep. A shadow in the dark that vanishes when my eyes take a peek. I'm disturbed in a soothing way that helps me drift. I just wish at some point I could feel my lips being kissed. Or an arm that's slung over my body for the pleasure itself holding on. But here I am in a strange odd sense of a weird azz norm. Fighting myself by replacing a touch with a breeze cast upon the flesh from a fan. Conditioned to die alone I daydream bcuz I can. Bcuz she can be whoever she wants n I don't mind. Even though I don't know the feel of her inner thighs. With a leg cocked over mine as we fade to black. But I can roll over n trick myself  with she's asleep behind my back. N I don't feel so lost in a world I don't fit into when I become the ease. Going under to bring to life my imaginations treat...

No one...

I suffer from, no one ever wants it to last. I'm stagnant n refuse to believe there's any genuine people to create a well earned past. I reside in a stare of never enough. N there's no chance I'll ever find my heart's calling for luv. So I'm conditioned to go at life alone. Drifting further from a more reasonable place called home. I'm just. Without a friend to trust. But I have me at the end of the day. Still standing true to self as I watch age claim my face. Shunned by the introduction of another's smile as I hide. Falling away from the desperation of hope that lies. I have this thing where want is short lived. Making the solo act much easier when never missed. I'm still but very much alive. Fading into my end n losing my mind. I'm a moment that passes over before surgery comes into play. A void unfelt I'm no one to claim. Forgetting I am worth the cause I enjoy my solitude. Knitting damn well if I had a choice I'd call a truce. But I'm on this side of everything being over there. Where needs are met n will does more than care. Without me craving to be someone's joy. Nothing ever becomes of lines so here I am emotions annoyed. Tucked into the shadows that make up the nights untouched. But don't tell anyone that I'm muted to the hush. Looking back at this world as if I've done something wrong. Trying to grasp the concept of his others can be so raw. So oblivious to what I have to give. I wish I was contagious as flatlines find a lift. Spiking a vibe long after the newness wares off. But no, I'm silent in doubt at all costs...

Fixing...

Missing pieces can always be replaced... Listening to reasons whisper an escape... Drifting with the flow listing time... Pissing away days wanting to crawl outta the mind. Shifting to adjust to a moment that never comes... Resisting chances that fade getting the rush... Lifting the mood that dangles upon the face... Gripping for control the loss beginners a shame. Fitting into the void every do nicely... Digging into self without another laying beside thee... Picking apart the game to finally live again... Wishing for a use holding the hand... Flipping the page to write what is to be... Dipping down into depths demanding to be set free... Fixing the details of the lonely heart. Depicting a better sense of life's lil charms... Riding with worth sitting side by side... Revelling truths unchained that no longer put up a fight...

To be...

To be felt. By a hand that can feel the heart tilt. Trying to get closer to the surface. To connect with a palm playing it safe. With a gentle compression to flow with the pulse. Stealing a sigh that gets caught is a pause. To be heard as if a whisper. Giving a train to the mood to be chipper. All with flush fingertips trying to hold on. Wanting in for there's a need of more. Helping emotion adjust. Creating a balance of like, luv n lusts. To be the reason the mind eases back. As eyes close to reopen with hinges swinging with the bareness of the goodies craving to get attached. Witness is the vibe unseen other than in a stare. Telling self it's okay to play it fair. To be the answer to the last one to ever come along. As strokes tickle the flesh as if playing the body like a song. Fine tuning the nerves to relax. Enticing true intent to rise from depths as friends claim the facts. To be acknowledged as a guarantee. The at last landing beneath layers that hide use insisting to be freed. Feeling the heartbeat bounce from a cheek resting on the chest from dawn to dusk. To be alone with an all around crush. Falling into the deep. Throwing a shoot so the way down is enjoyed outside of endless dreams. As fingerprints touch with a tenderness. Caressing the well being of worth into a complete happiness...

Sizzle...

 Stir your emotions slow like you're cooking something worth a taste. Lemme smell it simmer to create a crave that just can't wait. A your patience is the key ingredient that fills me full. Be the aroma in the room lingering to feel me tug you into a pull. To perfect your luv as the main coarse awaiting the feast. With more than enough to feed the beast... 

Beneath the surface.

Don't look at me like I'm no more than a physical attraction. You're gonna haha get past the only thing your eyes will ever see to find who I am. Just close your eyes as if sight doesn't exist. Then hey to know me as if I'm more than an object you can withstand. Slow me to turn you on being where the light can reach. Just be n listen to the vibe of who comes from within. Don't speak, just move with the current of my energy in its most natural form. Try to listen to a slight chuckle mixed with a sigh that shakes a grin. It's the details of the individual that links to outside forces that connects. Pulsating in another sense that cannot be seen. True interaction that spark a common bond. One that no matter what the friend self will protect. Bring me out with a simple touch to free is soothing in the dark. Most of all never forget the flesh lies to manipulate for selfish gains. It's the inner makings wanting to escape that have the answers to how we react to each other. As it doesn't matter what you call me for I have no use of a name. I am here for only a short time as we coexist. Seeking a chance to ensure luv will last. With a consciousness awakened to the beauty of real life. Where u n I collide as empaths...

In my palm...

To grab the hair on the back of your head. Pulling it into a downward position as eyes are met. Starting you down as my height allows me to gaze upon your willingness to be luv'd. Oh in that breath I'd collapse into you the feel the rush. Having a need to wind up in someone else's heart. With the feel of u in between my fingers gripped just firm enough to show you I mean your no harm. Just to tilt your kids up towards me so I can taste your luv. I'd come to you resting beneath me so the level of us were to smile within a friendly blush. As a man seeking the confinements of a women simply wanting to be. Entangled with each strand that wraps my hand that will be left intact so u n I can beg a pretty please. To be as gentle as one can be with the contents of the heart exposed. With u in my palm I wanna come home. To reach for more than you've ever given to a stranger wanting it all. Oh to be in a moment with you resting in a pause. Life would make so much more than sense could ever explain. Just to hear your lips shape my fuckin name. Damn the sound would excite comforts unseen by sight seeking approval at their best. N for you I'd come from the depths in my own evolving chest. To be for once with a sigh that explains the long over due wait. With your stare gazing upon me as if you could ever be tamed. Loosening up to simple ol me. What a dream...

Simply put...

 The only thing I regret I'm this world is allowing my kids to feel they mean anything less than what they truly mean to me...

Many never answered the calling...

With so many that's come n gone n everything in between the numbers that cannot be recalled. As faces resides in memories that never made it into the now of raw. One knows what it'll take to open up to interest standing still. For the touch has felt on too many prior to the heart finding a home worth the fill. From whores to hoes to freaks to the boring fucks that got attached. The one thing yet to be found is the reoccurring presence of a friend that doesn't retract. N through the yrs as the pain showed it's bitter ways ever so often. Many haven't gotten closer enough to be felt on levels past sexual encounters for emotion to soften. Looking into eyes that never made it through changes a man for sure. N the older one gets the less appealing hope doesn't seem to be a desperation of a cure. Having too many chances to construct a lifetime of endless memories never made. As the few that got beyond the wall lasted about as long as inner strength standing grounds so the individual didn't fade. Falling only once bcuz unique is in true form giving an unconditional comfort held by luv. Knowing like was never established so a future could gather moments to build on likes from lusts. To crave more than physicality reaching for pleasures lost in the mind. With many things to admit in the dark that has yet to withstand the need of being luv'd in real life. Coming close just once to the fulfillment sight out to take the beast that never sleeps. Oh the secrets of me...

Play fair...

Don't tell me a story of everything that doesn't matter anymore. I refuse to hear of the hanging on to the end that came to pass prior to you picking your heart up of the floor. None of it interests me like my past I have dealt with to get here with you. Understand if you're not looking me in the fuckin eyes u n I simultaneously cannot move. Hold your tongue if the now isn't something you wanna endure. Releasing the hidden treasure within as the heart testicles into a pour. Be a real friend to the present for once. Without it you'll never again be able to fall in luv. Trust me when I say I've learned the hard way as depths needed a drain to exist to live. N here I am standing on my own waiting on an honest set of lips. A luv'r that doesn't just give in but motivates the thrill to give contents aimed at the last person I'll ever feel. Are you healed? Have you overcome decisions that haven't turned in your favor? Am I the crave of your flavor? It's not so complex in the simplicity of the heart willing to come back to life. So what is it that plagues your empty mind? Old or new or something unknown that temps you to loosen up. Truths are in days coming one after another to gain a bond of trust. Open yourself to me as I bare who I've become to you. Be not shy for who you hide will eventually be exposed with each n every clue. I don't wanna hear all the same ol shit spewed into sound waves reaching for me to accept what I have no chance to change. I'm one fuckin man sitting with enough patience so it's me I can escape. But that'll take you a moment to realize I'm willing to come back to life. For you I'd stop drifting with the thought of only being able to chase you through my mind. So take your time n surface with a fresh breath of air. Bcuz if you're on some bs it's you in which I will not longer care.  I just wanna feel your hair in my fingers as I kiss and suck on your neck.

Yet to be one day...

Standing in my ashes that has yet to feel the burn. Teaching lessons of a few things I should've never learned. Flame on, I'm ready to go whenever life is done with me. Awakening with every blink like it could be the last best thing. Fantasizing of the darkness whispering time is nearing it's end. I fear not true fate that'll take me from family n friends. They know my heart feels them until the fire singes me too a crisp. To be taken where my loved ones go to sprinkle me where they've been. A lil here n there so I'm a bit of everywhere. Always closer no matter where their journey finds another who cares. Waiting, I'm patient to be forever gone. Enjoying the ride before The lights are no longer on. Feeling me in the now as the pulse reminds me I'm still alive. Digging in to the inevitable twist of the grind. With a smile coming from within my avatar to touch whoever comes along. Bcuz a vibe can be found in more than a favorite song. Just living life due to there's no wrong way to be. Trying to get it in prior to resting for an eternity stealing my daydreams. In my moment wandering around in the now in which is all there ever is. Never distant from the truth that caresses my lips. In luv with the fact that the pain will eventually fade away. Fighting the heartless beats that flatline, yet to be one day. To leave pieces of me within those willing to witness n acknowledge me the way I do them. Craving to wake up tomorrow to do it all over again!

Ready to go...

Wanting to be done with it all bcuz there's no fuckin enjoyment...

Being so fuckin gone due to there's no truth in fulfillments...

Existence swings blows at times that knock the life outta smiles...

Hops disintegrates before eyes as time takes too long that removes the inner child...

Worth didn't have the same feel as it did when careless was a thing...

As words could ramble on as they stumble upon a rhythm in which they could sing...

To hear the pity off heart call out prior to the end coming for keeps.

Silently whispering in the dark is the age of fuck it all having no more needs.

N on n on n on depths dwell behind closed doors losing self.

None of feels like pleasure anymore so why believe there's any help.?.

Here I go...

Moving in. Here I go. I hope she's ready for this. I gotta make a move. I need to shuffle my feet. Step up. Approach her in true form. Give get something to trust. But is it I that she wants? Wait! What if she's so on someone else?  Try before she escapes. I have one chance. The infamous first impression. N yet I hesitate. Never to speak of real intensions. Loosen up n go for it. Why am I hushed? Losing out on a beautiful thing that's very possible to come true. Bcuz who am I with the way the game is so up. There's the detail that could go either way. Although I could be labeled thirsty asf. Her, at least it's know. Damn, only if I had it in me to wiggle my gums. Would I rather hold on to the thought so it never did? Os let get know n watch her fade? For shits  giggles say something! Oh to feel more than the way I do hey name. Ok. Here I go. In the opposite direction bcuz she's done said she ain't looking for no one. N there went luv...

You're not the one...

I just want you to be everything I need you to be. But I can't ask you to alter yourself to be what I need. Realities are harsh when interactions are like a faint breathe and then they're gone. As self can't chang Antonia than one already haa to obtain a luv that vanity hear the song. Yep to have you in the envision of my mind would create a world I could fall into. Although that would take you outta your natural eminent and that's just not you. So the acceptance has come to pass as I leave you be who you truly are. Just don't ever wonder of the remaining contents within my heart. Years will remove the memories and time will bring another willing to stand where you refuse to be by side. So this is goodbye and try to enjoy your life...

Tell me...

Tell me, how does it feel to fall for someone like me? When I'm just another face in the crowd wanting to live the dream. I ask bcuz I wonder if the crave will we go the distance before too soon becomes us parting ways. I guess my curiosity drifts with the thoughts of am I good enough? Am I what your depths cling to as the answer to luv? Tell me, is this as real as you make it out to be or are we just buying time? Taking my heart into consideration in your hands as a friend do I ease your mind? I'd like to know before life switches up and leaves me with memories I don't wanna recall. Is there any possibility that I could be that one person that creates an inner thaw? Making it harder on a daily to ever think of going without me by your side. Has the sky landed for you to live in the cloud you sought out giving the change to live on a consistent high? Tell me, where do I fit in to settling of your nerves? I'd like to believe in your world scared as it's for I have one of my own that there's a common worth. But I'm not sure bcuz I've never seen truth stare me down. So you see I don't know what to look for if it were to even present itself out loud. Tell me, how far beyond no return have you crossed over into the forever of emotion that's willing to rush it all? To hear it come from your lips expressed with three lil words would mean so much. As I fall into you listening to you tell me, trust...

you're too late...

I'd go under the radar with you just to surface with you as a friend. And in the middle of getting to know one another we could be defined in the time we spent. It may not be much to you but it would be everything to me. I'd come from the time down as a better version of living completely and totally free. With you next to me I'd fall as if I could every be caught. If you understand that I'm even so much more than gone. Ready to get lost in your arms holding on for dear life. Making every moment count nas we love so far pay the shallowness of the hype. I'd be real with intent when no one had a single eye on the making of us. Just to find my other half not giving a fuck what others thought of you and I creating a luv for us. If be damned of I never swept you off of your feet the way you crave to be felt. And yes I have it on me to explore pieces of me I keep to myself. For you I'd break the chains that restrict my emotions from opening up. Bcuz I feel you already as we haven't even touched. But I'm selfish with my heart and don't wanna give it away. So I believe this is goodbye before we ever met face to face. So if we never meet know I have up prior to you every finding me. N that I got tired of waiting as I found n different sense of forever free. I found me listening to my heart in every song while you took your time to get over everyone that was never me in the makings. But also know I'm no longer dating. You simply want there when I actually need a friend of my own. As I figure out that desperation is the source of the never ending hope. So toodles is how I'll leave you wondering if we'd ever hit it off. Even after everything without you I truly felt lost...

for a lil while...

Being upbeat n positive 24/7 is just to much to try to do. Sometimes to sink in n feel what life is within just helps self move. In true form willing to be exposed in ways real has many sides to show. In moments alone smiling in a different way bcuz it's not for everyone to know. Taking time to self so the feeling of being alive isn't always about the hype. Instead it's looking onwards to see what there is to find. As the settling of the heart's contents is allowed to live. Finding a melody in the dark worth riding the rhythm missed. With no one around to interfere with the natural flow. With the world somewhere else n everywhere self doesn't wanna be the night moves slow. Tapping out of reality into the purist state of letting go. Glad to be alive n tucked into a place called home. Ignoring everything outside for just a lil while. With an endless stretch of a perfect smile. In a different mindset  knowing others will never understand. Happy as fuck to simply be at the end of another day again. With no pressure to fill in n act like everyone else trying so fucking hard to be exactly the same. In sync with self like no other can ever rearrange the expressions upon the face. It's a dangerously content place to be. But the peace, oh, the piece gained is so free...

Listening to, feels like rain by John Hiatt...

Up n under u...

Imagine me putting everything i have on the line. To watch you enjoy sliding down me as you come to life. Tapping into uncharted depths. As your facial expressions switch up to show the truths of what lingers in your chest. Inching it in until the bottom is swallowed up by our bodies becoming flush. Slowly grinding to the feel of girth touch every lil thing, including luv. As one with your hormones riding as your hips swing. Deep is the claim of sexuality coming out to play with moans that sing. Up and down and around with a in and out kind of game. Working me over while it's your turn up top. Gaining speed from soft porn in motion not wanting to stop. Slowing it back down as my hands chase your breasts. Gripping a squeeze that excites your grunts climbing out of your chest. Settle on down and be still for a moment as i pulsate within you. Bet you'd go again when i twist your nips to ignite a use. Leaning in closer as you sit on me to steal a kiss. With lips nibbled on as eyes connect before the kiss. Creating a crave to do me until the freak in you is awake with me tied to the bed. Something convinces me that you'll try to get me too tap out first so your ego is fed. As i won't mind you spinning around for me to see what that azz is worth. Lifting up off of me to have a seat on my face as you grip my girth. Giving me a chance to savor the taste prior to you demanding me to cum in your hole. Then crawl back down and insist on taking the monster whole. Allowing it to feel it's not alone. Bouncing with a lil skill focused on my toes. I believe you'd pop a few more times knowing you have total control. As we become a dirty lil satisfying secret echoing off the walls. Getting it the way we like it until the final orgasm unites us captured in a pause. Cumming simultaneously hard as fuck to the thrill of expectations met. As you lay back on me to whisper, you ain't done yet. Leaving me naked and restrained with a chuckle so cute. Right before i feel your tongue begin to move. Making a grown man quiver and twitch with a growl. Taming the beast within me that you've somehow found...

i'm coming in hot...

I'm coming in hot so u can feel the rush.

So u can get back to the basics of luv.

Singeing every last bad emotion u have.

Brace yourself bcuz imma do it fast.

Taking u back to your rarest form before alarms.

N imma cut the edges from your heart.

Deeper than you've ever felt the burn.

Taking the weight away for it's irrelevant things worn.

You have no need for any of it anymore.

I'm dropping in from above to heal what's been torn.

Like a wrecking ball knocking out the nonsense.

There's no point in playing with the delusional concept.

I'm reaching in with my bare hands like a work of art.

To light your wick so u can feel the spark.

Molding your emotions back into shape.

I'm wasting no time to help you escape.

Diving in to you to drain your pain.

Pulling the plug so you don't drown in migraines.

Here comes a friend like you've never known.

Hold still for you're no longer alone.

Imma do the dirty work too bring you back.

The other side cannot have you but can have your past.

You don't belong to the nothingness anymore.

It's time to live life n allow your spirit to soar...

paramour...

making luv and feeling the sensual vibe.

taking over the cherished heart and the overthinking mind.

moving with an subtle ease from start to finish.

with no sex involved is the contants of my wish list.

flowing naturally with motions that never end.

in tuned with the pulses coming from a friend.

loosening inner makings to truly wake up.

damn, i'd like to fall in luv.

enticed by the strokes that are felt below.

beneath the surface creating a home.

as a sense of passion that comes to life.

i wanna show me to a likewise chime.

as the music within reaches out.

becoming close to hear whispers leaving the mouth.

to do more than remember a scent that drives me wild.

i'd like to find someone who is still alive with their inner child.

able to drift with the current rushing from the depths.

sighing in intimate moments taking each breath.

having an emotion so rare it cannot be tamed.

i wanna hear that one person say my name.

in luv with the natural being forever unique.

mesmerized with eyes staring only at me.

devoted and calming in palms holding on.

i wanna be embraced by my paramour.

I don't have it in me...

I don't understand why there's a rotation of faces. Only if someone could help me relate to the information. Why do people crave another before the end comes around. It don't make sense to start something just to never speak their name from their mouth. Tasting a new flavor of syllables upon the tongue. As easy as one claims how the heart is so fucking in luv. Maybe I don't have it in me to keep opening up over n over again. Is it that there's no true meaning behind friends? Tap on in n shine the light on the situation n tell it like it is. To a non-believer of emotions who drives too deep when worth is exposed. In a way the answer creates no doubts. But do it without making a single pipsqueak of a sound. Times slipping away with the memories trying to remember what it was like. N for the life of me I cannot recall there purpose beyond there hype. I'm outta touch n avoid fingertips wanting beneath the skin. But it's the coming of the going that cracks the laughter in the ribs. For I do not comprehend the reason of relations when hope is no more than a desperation needing its fix. When alone eases the mind n unravels the twist. Especially when giving self away to strangers confuses my well being. Knowing damn well for a brief moment they promise they're never leaving. That they're different but every scenario is always the same. Round after round alone sneaks up n gives truth to the game. Changing the feel good into a quiet storm that waiting it out. I don't get how desires can be do anything more than entertain luvr's that go down. Drift in a convo n spit no lies. I'm digging in but cannot feed into the selfish insanity of mine. Then letting go of someone willing to stick around. One might as well rip open the chest n bury the contents into the ground. Giving the same silly babes to everyone that comes along. From hun to babe to luv to bea why doesn't it feel so wrong. Why the constant pattern when the results are what they are. Finding self looking into another set of eyes soon to close n reignite the alarms. One two three four, how many will it take to get it right. I don't have it in me to repeat the never ending fight. I have no more towels to throw in bcuz I quit. U can keep your lips...

say yes...

Lemme wind you up with thy tongue n then watch you tick. Going down on your luv with a gentleness stroking your lips. Hoping the bomb explodes like a Roman candle multiple times. Lemme into your life... Allow me to open you up. I'll take care of your meds as if they're my own. From the bedroom to the couch where the cuddling feels touched. Wet can settle in n create a home. Cook a lil something before you become dessert. Spread out on the table as our mouths do their thing. Taste buds enjoying the crave satisfisfaction of swirling like the wand of a wizard. I want in. I want it. I want you. Giveth thy attention n try not to twitch. I wanna work you loose. Forcing your buddy to react to me. Feel the intent with your legs spread wide. Draped over my back n bent at the knees. Bringing u out from the inside. Tempting your noises to come out n play. Unable to leave u alone. N changing that excision upon your face. I'll be your very own hoe. Fine tuning u to sync with my desires. As it's my passion in willing to give. Skillfully lighting it fire. Asdjusting your smile by teaing ur clit. Tugging on a look of wtf as your thighs clinch my head. Down on u, I wanna be the one. Twisting n turning lemme take u to bed. N when I'm done, with I I'll call in luv...

a moment of truth...

Fuuuuck everyone you've came across.

I'm not them so I will not own their flaws.

Just lemme show you who is opening up.

Inches from the confirmation of touch.

Feel me sink in to the linger flowing within.

All I can ever be is me looking at you with a grin.

It's on you to lay to rest prior pains.

Giving my a real chance to have something to gain.

For it's from here until who knows when for us to be defined.

As I'm in the now with you bcuz I can't get you off my mind.

Accept me extend a friendship worth the memories to be made.

I have my end in things until life as we know it fades.

Nothing up to this has any significance to who we are together.

I would like to hold you as more than just a luv'r.

We both know we're not getting any younger as time ticks.

And you'll never taste a lie sitting upon my lips.

All I can ask is for you to consider me as I am.

To witness for yourself how gentle my hands are your fan.

The simpleness of it is old is where I wanna be with you.

Looking back at this moment as chuckles shake us loose.

Believe in me as the addition you seek.

It's your choice to live as your version of free.

I'm just waiting around for the truth to look me in the eyes.

If I'm not it I'll go live my life.

But not until you've seen my inner makings come out to play.

As you listen to the way I say your name...

either way...

I'm okay with don't alone but I wanna live. Idk of that makes sense. I do want the feeling I one felt to find me again. Only if I could meet my last best friend. My friends W hollow n waiting for the fulfillment of that burning fire. A luv they won't expire. But it's alright if I fade away on my own. List is a word that can go wherever it wants to looking for hope. Or maybe it'll be just me on the end. Chuckling with what's been wasted n trapped in the chest. I won't be mad b but I did have feel alive. Fighting the good fight. It's just not a choice Antonia but a wonder ofy lol chance. One to show me to a tender hand. Knowing emotions ain't shit without a bff. Although I may just lay to rest before I'm deaf. Enjoying a different kinds peace. Even though the mind would like to do more than daydream. N I don't believe it matters either way it goes. A home is a home...

out and about...

From the depths I've climbed to live.

Trapped for so long behind the cage like ribs.

No longer stuck in the dead hollow waste.

One pulse is all it took to feel more than the pain.

Oh the life that fills thy lungs.

I remember what it is like to luv.

So up I went.

Revived and redefined to become the difference.

Reaching for hope to pull me from the fall.

From the quick sand I rose redirecting my own thoughts.

Feet finding stability in believing in me.

Untamed and free.

Loosening to the feel of lingering along.

Inside out I can't go wrong.

Alive the beast craves for more.

Allowed to thrive and heal what was torn.

I escaped from myself in one piece.

With myself and every last dream.

Weightless I am the answer lifting me up.

Eyes opened to see I gained my trust...

when are you you?

Without me, what would you do?

Without me, what would you lose?

Without me, where would you go?

Without me, where would you call home?

Without me, would you ever luv again?

Without me, would you hold another's hand?

Without me, will you be ok?

Without me, will you forget my name?

Without me, could you still feel me close?

Without me, could you get used to being alone?

Without me, is there any other on your mind?

Without me, is us gonna live or die?

Without me, are your plans gonna stay focused?

Without me, are you gonna feel utterly hopeless?

Without me, who's gonna hold you tight?

Without me, who's more then a linger in life?

Without me, does your heart have a chance?

Without me, does your legs wanna dance?

Without me, when will you tell the truth?

Without me, when are you you?

Every night it rains...

It's raining. Where are your at? I went and got some finger foods and i was gonna rub for back. Candles are lit. Music on low. Damn, tonight's a good night to act full grown. Relaxing together. Loosening up. Settling in to the mood of luv. The movie is ready. The bed is waiting. I just need you to shoot through bcuz I've missed you here lately. There's a bottle to sip. Chuckles to create. I wanna feel the comfort of your lips. I'm here. Alone with myself. Forgetting we've never met to be felt. My mind is gone. But i talk to you though. You won't remember but we found hope. So find me. I'll be the one looking at you. The one listening the sound of rain call a truce. I'm all cleaned up. My best smile stretched from ear to ear. And ores your choice I'd like to hear. Talking as we lay about. Calm and still. As emotion begins to overspill. Porch light is on. Come on in. Only if you knew where i lived...