fadin me

What happens when u don't see self in the mirrors image?
When that face you've known since birth has been damaged.
As eyes shy away from the reflection catchin a glimpse in the peripheral.
Walkin by ignorin what the pain has changed within behind the kill.
Where does one turn when a stranger stares empty n hateful?
As expressions go unnoticed n lost missin beyond repairs bulshhhhhh.

my secret weapon

Ur that sensitivity.
That sweet spot if ever touched by another.
With a pain paintin a bigger picture.
Of a loss if lost greater than ive ever known.
A kinda pure luv thats been needed.
Wanted inna sense of reality.
For once in my life comin thru.
I feel cuz u r who u r n my minds blown.
My secret weapon.
Rounds of u ricochet thru nerves.
Cross firin emotional signals.
Rapid fire on my luv.
Ur that collision with the truth.
Flippin switches in our time.
On im turned with a new state of mind.
All in the presence for a moment flush.

funny

I may have lost a step last time around. Yet im one foot ahead gainin ground. Pushed to the limits to stand as a better man. Hangin toenails dug into the pavement damned. Sucked thru the heart n unstable I wasnt sure if have much use. For my own sanity popped its main fuse. Lights out shit went black. N all I remember is it happened s fast. Like a switch clicked off n then back on. I realized that life wasnt where I was goin. Over played, boundaries were erased. Yet every time I moved I crossed imaginary fate. Kickin me in the shins to keep my ignorance at s halt. N that only made the emotions event come to a pause. Cuz there was a freeloader suckin away at my best. But yet I was the one who it was said to be that couldnt pass the test. Its funny how the decieved reacts to the illusions. Caught up in the middle of the confusion.

strange stranger

Its funny how ones presence changes in eyes that makes the difference.
As u stand as the only thing u know how to be in ur deliverance.
Wether it be selfs fault or the truths of another of what they truly want.
Showin the depths of what comforts them awaitin their hand of luv.
Strange things happen along the way that changes the coarse sailed.
Faces in their original shape r witness as someone who's failed.
Breakin down the texture n freezin the moisture floodin the hearts empty.
Strangers as friends at the end of a friendship becomin a stranger acceptin.
Time is the rarest thing to last once the launch runs on fumes.
All cuz one of the two didnt feel the need to refuel the boom.
Explodin the inner walls of emotions as wild as flowers growin in paradise.
N its crazy to say the least that it alway begins n ends with the lies.
Havin withdrawals for someone that couldnt give 100 to the questions.
Fizzlin out luvs existence as if a temporary state of frustration is the attention.

repair

Seized n captured by a run of ol familiar n unbelievable fate.
Held as if secrets could talk freely in arms never to release the pain.
Jus so the healin heart has a friend to wrap the struggle with joy.
As the purpose of luv doesn't havta fill what Is a torn void.
The battle isn't that of their own to fight for what is left.
Yet repaired by the right amount of emotional reason that helps.
Reshapin the feein beatin n severed from the cores worth.
As truth touches the sweet spot that speaks louder than words.

im taken

In u came n down under the norm u went.
Slippin beneath the skin as the needles spit.
A fix u r to the arteries pumpin ur flow.
Felt n easin my passion hopin the vein dont roll.
Injectin my habit I feel the rush of confort.
A luv thatll be the end to my addictions core.
Takin control u tame emotions overwhelmed.
Settlin my nerves cure as the sizzlin in the spoon melts.
My choice of what is to kill me before I stand a chance.
I sit wth the silence calmin thoughts endless dance.
Away we go so magically as everything disappears.
As its u n I runnin from this worlds deceivin tears.
Spikin my reality into the illusion of me bein free.
Take me n show me how it feels to live the dream.

drippin dry

From the fire that melted away the sizzlin pains pleeds.
Disintegrated into thin air blowin with the breeze.
Caught by a cloud floatin along to capture my truths.
Buildin a drizzle drippin drops weighin down its use.
Givin way the release pourin the cleanse upon what is to be now.
Walkin out the storm dry once the lesson has shown me how.

within the hearts crack

I allowed the heart to crack.
Into a shape that smiled.
N as it was chippin away the stone texture.
It was broken beyond repairs matter.
The man within rose n bloomed.
To witness its own doomed.
Trustin an other to fill a void.
Feelins ripped loose as I found joy.
Tearin me apart lil by lil.
Til who I was stood silently still.
The head hangs in the balance of confusion.
Battlin a war that feeds the illusion.
Luv does not exist in eyes that weep.
Tryin to see clearly y time leaves.
Loosened by the pounds that beat my worth.
Listenin to the vibes goin mute to words.
I am jus a man attemptin to feel the gain.
Strugglin to be felt as if I was the rain.
As the opened gate is a lonely defeat.
Once the passion is layed at the feet.
Unrecognizable n beggin for mercies  pause.
I see n have seen the ends lost cause.
N all I ever wanted was somethin as real as air.
To be able to breathe what is considered fair.
Inhalin a females pheromones til the end.
Jus one in which I as self can bend.
Yet the inability of returnin what I give is absent.
Forcin the hole to walk thru me to decend.
Grippin the wrist of touchn go to settle on the surface.
Before the skin melts n im vulnerable to lust.
Seekin self righteousness playin me as a pawn.
From the early light of dusks dawn.
Im left with a war I can not win beneath the pain.
N im bout to even the odds cuz I refuse to go insane.

leanin in

Allowin the heart to think so it knows what we share is real.
As the mind cuddles emotions that care to simply feel.
Takin control n tryin not to be consumed forgettin me.
Leanin in for more than whats needed for self tr breathe.
Yet givin to no extent of livin thru ur smile that gives life to mine.
Jus wantin my moment to melt into ur touches enjoyin time.
That is if u can luv me like ive never been luvd before.
Makin my desire for u never end n wantin so much more.

sealed

I have a scar u could caress with a touch of luv to help it feel as if ur gentleness makes it feel it belongs.
Its depth has earned its placd as of what ::) ot to do if ur interested in how it now understands emotions song.
That is if u care to soften the texture awaitin a hand so easy the difference cant be felt beneath the luv.
As the wound has healed for u know who to stay in the presence of strength buildin a form of character of who it once was.
Theres a sealed slit in which drained what Wasn't needed n closed out what time has undergone thru luvs drug.
Ready n willin to express what never got lost along its wayas the redirection is aimed at u comin undone.. that is if u got I in u to feel the shape its shifted a new way to be seen by lessons eyes.
I gotta deep reconstruction formed that hasnt been truly witness as of yet in my playin out worth with life.

please know I

Jus in case its me that forgets what we have.
Please know I intended never to remember as the past.
Im jus thinkin ahead a bit to soon I know.
Yet if that time ever comes where my faults r at an all time low.
I am in luv with u n enjoy bein that special piece of ur days.
Even if it were some time from now n things jus aint the same.
Keep in ur mind n fresh in ur heart I wanna hold u.
Cuz we all forget from time to time as if we havent a clue.
So by chance its me that lets u down when id never do.
Please know I never meant to hurt u n how much I do luv u.

breeze of change

Listenin to the lyrics riddle at my pain.
As if I fill its void in its empty hands.
Pullin me from within for the world to see.
Tellin the secrets of my endless dreams.
Flowin with the emotions that cling to the melody.
Drivin a spear thru the sweetest depth of the heart.
In a sense of cleansin away the char in the dark.
On display n im unable to hide the rotation.
As It sinks into a severe penetration.
Forcin thoughs to explain the captured tilt.
Spinnin carelessly with the closier delt.
Under the ink spiiled before it attempts to feed the lips.
As truth spills memories that drips.
Hearin my life played within the structure of the beat.
Pumpin my very own words dyin to be relieved.
Relivin times that have unchained the connections plunder.
The chorus rolls inside like thunder.
As the wonder fills a song completin my tangled pleads unraveled.
Im witness to my life n the road less traveled.
The Windows of my own catches the breeze of change.
Releasin the edge cuz a pot to piss in is the echange.
Thrown back to become whole n one with stability.
Grippin the throat of realities misplaced me.

hold the line

Dont let me fall away if I ever seem as if im fadin.
Ur touch has come to speak in a way as if its luv makin.
Hold the line unseen to the naked eyes struggle if I so veer.
Catch my on the downside spiralin outta controls single tear.
 Be that friend I believe u to be in my hearts configuration.
That one who wont let go of destination.
Rally me back to the reality of true luvs piece of mind.
So i will nevr forget the work u put in to make me ur mine.

Tell me

Tell me how it ends. How easy it is for u to walk away. So when that time comes ill understand. That way ill know how to respond within that day. Tell me the reason of u leavin before I get caught up. Losin my mind from the loss. Settin reality apart from what I awaken to as of now. Givin me strength so the heart wont be used as if a pawn. Tell me prior to the date in which all begins to fade. Id luv to know y im jus not good enough. Cuz to be aware of the crumblin memories endin would prepare me. Of how u lost interest in speakin my name. Tell me for shits n giggles. How im suppose to make it till then. Livin with the devastation of u gone. I jus need to gather ho I became someone u don't consider ur friend. Tell me how i win up missin out on u. On us makin sweet cherishable moments that parish in time. Cuz it jus might cushion the blow of how u blew my mind. Not once but twice as what we share is left within the walls of the distructin mind.

driven insane

My mind told me to join reality cuz im drivin it insane.
Yet the lil thing with that is the world's head is empty leavin them all one in the same.
Followin societies unwritten guidelines of capturin individuality.
N im the one my thoughts turn on simultaneously.
I've searched for the answers my dome finds explicit.
U jus dont know how bad im tired of fightin self over the b.s.
I cant even get a response outta the simplest questions anymore.
As the frustration leads to confushions cloud like reason of unreasonable gore.
Jus go it says, jus leave me alone already for cryin out loud.
Does it not understand the concern unspoken in silences mouth?
As the tongue cant even taste the words hidden from the use of speech.
All I wanna know is how come life turned on me!

ready n waitin

Im still waitin for the mornin to rise over the horizon.

Every night whisperin g'night n layin my head that rides em.

As numb as comfortable can be tossin as still as sleep breaks for the light.

N it's a bit fuzzy of how I've come to the day that ends in my endless mind.

Jus wantin life to come back around to my smiles curve.

Oh what I'd give to take it as far as another lesson learned.
Yet I can't dig so deep as to open up n pump the heart.
Its as if ive been ruined no matter how much I fight the bark.
Howlin at midnights rush to touch luv so distant somewhere beneath the same moon..
Ive been borrowin tomorrows trust leavin an empty tomb.
N im over the emotions edge fadin n ready to feel the norm.
Cuz theres no return this time around From becomin a male whore.

ur outta here

I felt it comin.
The end came to soon of a lifetime spent.
N now I sit knowin my heart can't possibly break anymore than it already has.
Layin in ur hands.
The calm rush turned me inside out.
N ur heart lied.
I can't see self holdin on to the betrayal.
So ur outta here for good.
Evicted n banished from emotions I never thought would die.
Yet youve caused the Unthinkable.
Im in luv with someone else.
Theres a relief.
N now that ive filled myself with a joy I can not describe.
I jus wanted to let it be known.
What I thought we had, I have now.
In someone else.

who

It hurts knowin who I luvd wasnt u.
The who I though u were without proof.
Who u turned out to be has damaged my heart.
N anymore I believe I dont know who u r.
The deliberate ways in which youve shown.
I wish I woulda known before my mind was blown.
Back when who u were in my eyes was endless.
U were the only one I ever wanted but u were friendless.
Doin to me what others did to u cuz I was supposed to do u the same way.
Yet never once did I ever down play u as u strayed.
The end! It has come to pass with only memories u didnt earn.
Guess all n all everyone else's flaws had me kicked in the balls.
N now im left with the realization that its an other that holds my worth.
Simply cuz u never came forth n showed me who u were behind ur words.
Who r u truoy deep beneath what  ive touched.
Cuz I was present n so madly in luv.
I hope tha who u think I am doest shadow who I really am.
We both know, by ur side I became one hell of a man.
As theres no reason to say goodbye.
Ive accepted who I am to u n moved on with my life.
I jus wanna thank u for breakin me so I can be me.
Cuz without u I who I was before u shattered my dream......

I dont wanna know

When r u comin back
Cuz I dont wanna decide
Life is nothin like I remember before
As inside my mind I hide
Findin myself givin away emotions
Worth every moment taken
As I feel the difference
Between somethin real n forsaken
Cuz I balance two everyday
N I feel my smile again
Acceptin the way shit is
With a comfort ive never demanded to feel
Its pure in the way I thought it was
Yet there's more truth now
So please I dont wanna know
Cuz im in luv with an other in which I found

what happens to a friend

Where do they go after all is said n done?
Once time winds up on the back end.                        Til the end comes to soon.
What happens to a friend.
When forever beomes yesterday.
N luv seems to be nothin but a lie.
Who becomes who in a different way.
Somewhere out there with the whys.
Findin the past is no more than a memory.
On their way away from what was here.
As no matter what gave up.
wonderin what will be behind the tears.
Grippin the cheeks once kissed.
 Comin to rest in a pause before lettin go.
In life they turn on emotions use.
A truth left behind lost n alone.
With so much time spent.
Did any of it mean anything.
Tellin self what one never wanted to hear.
Theyre gone now so I was couldnt had been everything.

the decision of strength

Touched by the force of the currents soft texture. Neck high n the waters r risin for the levels to be measured. Will the man within come out n play a malicious game. Or be trapped by the pressure closin in n drowned by the pourin rain. The crushin of the collapsin mind has to decide what strength truly is. In a moment that defines the depths of survivals fists. Clinched n buried either below the suns caress that will never be felt again. Our in life's face balled up n swingin to stand as a man. Sink or swim, floatin with exhaustion as the head bobs above the surface. Thinkin, was the fight every worthy of the expressions of worth it. Surrounded by a gribless substance with no form that holds the war behind the lids at bays drip wantin to set sail. N it's how this battle is fought is what shall become of an individual's unspoken tale.

pushin the poison

Is all the emotions faded as they were spent?
Cuz I can't find the truth that was sent.
From somewhere deep enough to make a difference.
As I witnessed first hand the death of defense.
Jus to build a wall not even I can climb over.
N I'm tried everything to keep it together.
Cuz I was afraid of feelin that way again.
Yet what's left is the reconstruction of a man.
I keep pushin the poison thru the veins.
Hopin to feel the depth reach for the claim.
Is it to late to gather the only thing that can break me down?
Lettin loose of the grip that dangled my all.
As fallin it's the thrill takin control as I clawed.
Clingin to the pieces escapin the structure.
Knowin I never had a chance at future.
Slippin while eyes couldn't see the end in sight.
I gave me n now I have me as I hadn't lied.
Strugglin with the confusion set in to what become if my life.
Behind the visual display that still tears me apart no one can know why.
It's jus the way time has rotated for me to rise to the occasion.
Yeah I once stood in the presence of luvs imitation.

representation of luv

When u can't say what u would normally the way you usually could.

It doesn't mean ur not bein yourself by tryin to change in the way u once stood.

For every once in a while the nibble on the end of the tongue is selfs redirection.

Tryin to find the words with the right tone to show an other they're worth the inner inspection.

Hopin to assure someone that the brutal harshness isn't needed in relations.

Checkin the complexity of the situation that gives purpose to the other individuals emotions.

Rearrangin the delivery so the I as me comes across to the ear so unique it's filled with understandin.

Jus cuz this one is worth the realization of maturity that climbs from the truths never demandin.

It's the growth from somewhere deep enough to feel the meanin surfacin thru verbal communication.

N how we represent our luv for a special someone is in the way of becomin real with expectations.

The twist of straightenin out language to the point of hearin self in the other end bein felt.

Is only the importance of an other fillin a space life no one else has as gettin at it is no longer on tilt.

I had no chance

Turn around.
See how my eyes beg.
In a moment's truth.
Before the memory becomes vague.
Notice how I watch u leave.
Strugglin n crushed.
I'm standin in the middle if my own raindrops.
Drippin n flushed.
Look at what you've done.
I'm dazed n confused.
Releasin emotions I can't hold in.
Feelins of bein used.
Thinkin what the fuck?
It's really come to this.
Am I not more than enough?
For this us bullshit!
Listen to the heart explodin.
With each pulsatin beat.
Ur killin every intention I ever had.
As my core leaks.
Was it ever no matter what?
Us for life right?
Best friends forever.
But ur givin up what u considered mine.
Jus that easy to walk away huh?
Like none of it even mattered.
It's the saddest thing I've felt as of yet.
Ur leavin me shattered.
In pieces without the glue that holds me together.
Guess u were nothin more than a luv'r.
As I stand as still as tryin to grip my life.
Fadin n fallin apart around me.
I can't believe this is it.
Wakin from an ever wanted cherished dream.
Alone as self couldn't help but to fail.
I had no chance.
Every step of the way I was there.
For u as ur rage enhanced.
I was never of any depth at all.
As u dismembered my all.
N I'm the only one left to feel the loss.
As I fall into a drift so fuckin lost.

change

To luv in a way ones never luvd before.
In a different kinda mindset that wants more.
Turnin around inside the noggin.
Changin the password to the heart so am other can log in.
Findin which direction self is comin from within.
Jus to visualize what angle luv witnesses me explodin.
So I to not only knew where I'm comin from.
But how the man in me is seen brushin off bein so numb.
Tryin to accept emotions runnin as wild as life.
With so many reasons n ways to become a better version out from the shadow of the hype.
As a new path has been dug into the hearts core.
For the flows current captures the now explored.
Standin outside the thoughts that may be misleadin.
Jus for a greater purpose to show what's truly relievin.
In front of confrontin tune starin down confessions wantin to change.
Joiin to feel in return an equal maturity exchanged.

here's the thing

Here's the thing, so tell me if u can feel this. I found someone who I wanted to spend some real time with as I was forced to walk away. Jus to wind up in someone else's arms I feel the M same way for. I'm not hung up, juts tryin ti express hire it is I waited on one to open up n give what I gave. To luv Standin before me exciting my days. It's funny how someone can let u down after spendin the time of truth out into them. N it's no where what you've wanted in that one person you truly wanted. Yeah, its like a better version of relations. N here's the kicker. Once upon Time I would find anything for one. But reality kicked in n I'm findin I don't wanna do without luv fir she has a name. Shelby! Kinda weird but I accept get n the way she comes forth. N do anything for my kill last.bcuz somethin I swore if never do again. Yet for her I jus cant help but ti wanna feel as deep as she's skin to crawl within me n live. For then to now. Now I have somethin I can trust. As the past broke down for the present to show me a better place with an other face that hasn't ked as if yet. N that's some good shit cuz I aint lookin back . Nor tradin her for anything. Jus strange I found what I'm lookin for in someone I never knew existed. As if we should ever had this chance? N here's the thing that gets me the most. She's got somethin no one else never had before. My back!!! Talk about earnin yr place. Huh. Id give her anything I could to help her smile. U see, she pulled me from my own demise. I was destroying myself as she came along. N it's cuz if her, II've been able to get back yo whom I was before the wrong one hit their hands on me.

frIend or foe

Are you my friend?

Ior us there something you want from me?

I hear you say you'll be here until the end.

But how long will it be before I awaken from this dream?

You're going to have to excuse me just a tad.

You see im just ring to understand your angle ifs all.

I have been down this road as emotions clashed.

So is it the memories you're wanting hung on the walls?

Please forgive me for this moment has come.

I don't mean to be so direct but I have not gotten any loose time.

I'm just so tired if never truly having a home.

Spending minutes like change just to watch it unwind.

Can you see me for who I am trying to get to you?

Wanting to make love to you in more ways than one.

Opened for words of ttruth to put my actions to use.

Peeking from behind eyelids that are dried up and numb.

Tell me, is it you're feeling me and if so why be a part of me in the middle if a pause.

Help me understand how I'm suppose to take you.

On a serious note as real as maturity can walk and talk.

Slow intentions to be known as second that display honesty give me clues.

Are you here for me it are you a foe?

In disguise like those that have come before you.

Look me in my eyes and show me why it's me you want to know.

Because this gig can be played without claim for a melody searching for truce.

Can you dare to step into an intelligent situation worth the ticks rounding out your life to last?

I'm just asking do the pages aren't left blank before our story is over.

Are you a friendly face that has not an other expression behind my back?

For the record that's lied under the same circumstances with a different lover.

no longer

I no longer miss u with a passion I can not describe.
N as I walk into my future without u.
I wish I knew u knew I am no longer afraid.
The so called one, the pain gfs faded knowin the truth.
N thats / the reality of we r no longer side by side.
I have found a way to luv again yes.
I know this is the way it hasta be.
This is y I've allowed Shelby to get my best.
I'm not sayin I ever wanna return to ur arms.
Jus takin a moment to finally wash u away.
Cuz I now y it was I stood next to u.
N I know now that it was better I didn't stay.
I'm in a place where my heart can ease.
With time jus unwindin from all you've done.
I thought I was dyin when with u.
Damn near died wilkin in the other direction on the run.
But I made it out from under ur spell.
N I have a chance to save what's left n rebuild.
All the way around u had not a clue.
I was the one that took every blow n was unfulfilled.
As I think back u must not have realized me.
I felt alone even next to u n that's sad.
I fell as pieces scattered as time was wasted.
Yet my smile has found somethin real n I aint mad.
I came dead last n I'm jus glad it ended when it did.
I'm no longer in luv with u nor do I feel for u.
Because of u I broke to find my worth.
But I wish u well for I no longer hang from ur noose.
This is the last I'll ever give u acknowledgement.
I have nothin left to prove to someone like whom u r.
I got a lil lady that's more than u ever wanted to be.
So goodbye thoughts n so long as space becomes far.

it's gettin old

Seduced by lifes lies of happiness before the eyes that doesnt have xray vision claimin mine.
With the same stare in the mirror that's so familiar I jus can't seem to care bout a tear.
N everytime I try to depend on someone my reflections shakin his fuckin head like I'm blind.
Guess this time around I should be fine but my minds wrapped around the obstacles I gotta climb.
Alone n battlin a war without a chord to these words so rhythmless as i pour out my core in tour.
I'm headed up hill no matter what n I'm fucked in or outside a lil fuckin thing called luv.
I'm tired of waitin on someone else to have their end wantin to be felt when in life is where I need the help.
It's gettin old to say the least cuz the beast inside is bout three ticks away from bein released.
Yeah I'm close to roastin the b.s. down with my climatic dick hose n keep it in the roll.
I jus aint hit time for the half Steppin Trippin my own two feet gettin to where I need be.
Cuz a hand lent is a grip Squeezin progress with a twist held in for what wants to feel the shape of my lips.
Tellin the truth of what it's gonna take, so make it happen cuz it's a lil to late for this shit to stay the same.
Over n over I keep Hearin Pete n repeat feedin me fake drips that leak incomplete on my tastebuds plead.
Yet once again it's the man in me bendin to an others flaws cuz I'm the only one who can stand up n thinkin, damn?

grateful

I got hurt. N somehow thru it all I had no worth.

After all I put into it. I was treated like straight up shit.

When shit broke down, no matter what meant nothin. Ain't that somethin.

Funny how time lingers on. Gettin over one for luvs reborn.

Diggin for a deeper emotion. Waitin on that returned devotion.

I found luv. Yeah it surprised that shit outta me to.

But I had to go for it. It's what I needed to fix that incompletions twist.

I couldn't help but to reach. N attempt to feel with an inward lean.

I'm better off. N I'm grateful I got so fuckin lost.

It gave me a chance to find me. N bein me wound me up with Shelby!

Yeah I got fucked over n lost damn near everything. But my heart sings.

Findin a new rhythms pulse that clings to mine. N she's my kind.

who'd fuckin care?

If I were to walk away, would it mean anything?

Jus step n fade into time as a different kinda something.

All night I hide from the day that never seems tp change.

N anymore everything is so fuckin rearranged.

So if I turned n drifted into wasted space.

Would it be any different than what I'm doin if I stayed.

Life jus isn't fun anymore as I live with a blank stare set in my eyes.

Shit jus wigged out n flipped givin up on ties.

The settlin ease is gone n all thats left is the pieces that don't fit.

It's a disaster what happened to the stability I've known n I miss.

N all I truly wanna know is if I disappear by mornin, who'd fuckin care?

Cuz I care less n less everyday that slips away as a tear.

Rippin my world apart n leavin me here to find

my way.

Guess I was careless with how good I had it.

Damn, I think I fucked up n it can't be fixed.

At least no time soon as im beggin myself to try a bit harder.

Jus a lil so I can feel like me again as the next time we'd be smarter.

Yet as of this moment I'm tired of battlin a loss that never shoulda fell away.

Makes no sense of y its had to come to this.

Yeah, my life has become distant n needin an outlet from the b.s.

So if I were to poof, be gone n hide in the shadows.

Far enough away, runnin from the hollow.

Would it be easier to be forgotten like I have been?

Cuz I can't find my own worth as im separated from my own friend.

the game

Its a physical game of rollin the dice.

With one bullet in the chamber makin ones way thru life.

Roulette of the heart pausin for claims of keep.

Settlin into a mindset with a trump as the lead.

Up to the plate ready to blast one out the park.

Beyond the walls in closed space makin a mark.

A friendly way of play with a poker face.

Tryin to make it home roundin third base.

Its a timin thing where two r on the same page.

Runnin a hundred yards to cross luvs line n be safe.

Back n forth fightin fir a victory lap that goes round n round.

With wheels spinnin as driftin is a chase found.

Takin the checkered flag to victory lane.

It's all in the way the games played.

Jabbin I the middle of the ring cuz the corner had nowhere to go.

Takin n givin every worn down black n blue blow.

Dingin the head rings from the shot fired out the gate.

As legs move faster afraid to be left behind or even be late.

Right down the middle as one touch downs inside an others smile.

Into the memory where history is made n put on file.

A place where names r heard hated or luvd.

Under the faceless armor that jousts a nudge.

Fallin uncontrollably to the bottom of a pile on.

Fightin n diggin for the will to keep goin.

It's a game of hide n seek peekin so it knows for sure.

Callin out Marco n listenin to the engine roar.

As the closer we get the further we r away runnin it's time.

Hopin for overtime cuz one more goal will settle the mind.

Divin in as the splash collapses in n around the body do snug.

Jus to rise for air after bein held under by its touch.

As the drownin sweat rolls n knocks down pins put in place.

With another strike within the frame we turkey again as the pieces lay.

Hunted down as if the game was self n the capture was sweet.

N the final round is fatal n ones down for the count off the feet.

walk away

I'm nothin more than a silent secret within ur own truths hidden away for ur own gain.

I do apologies for the way I think but I'm left in this state of mind cuz it's me u think u can tame.

Funny shit to say the least as what's released from the glass heart you've ruined I'd now tinted n home.

Come along n ill show u how ur own actions tell on u im ways I've clung to for my own dome.

Step to the plate n be who u really r n challenge yourself to change for the better like I have.

Then maybe you'll understand what it took to walk away as I was forced to do.

Cuz there us no more runnin young inside myself Findin pieces if what's left of u.

My heart is healed from the virus u suck me with time n time again.

N as I walked away I felt my own become the man I was before I became ur biggest fan.

In stride n Steppin away from a luv that I thought would last a lifetime as she's were mixed.

But u failed to mention truths that were never heard from ur lips.

Feelin what we both know mow how we couldn't walk away then to wind up  like this.

It is what it us cuz I finally turned aroundfor I've had enough of ur shit.

rippin the r.I.p.

Below the level of comprimise.

A lone man sits without a soul to confide.

On a trip within, hes motionless inside nerves.

Rippin away the n edge punchin a way out cuz he can't be heard.

The minds soundproof, rattled n comin undone.

Unravelled from bein fuckin hemmed up.

Stompin on dead emotions tryin to speak.

Hidden behind the eyes that'll never leak.

A heathen alive is trapped n blackin out.

As silenced whimpers r yanked back into the mouth.

So guess where that leaves u tryin to enjoy ur stay?

Jus attempt a touchy feel n witness the reactions rage.

Rippin the r.I.p. thru the skin, out from under the sickest grin.

Don't tempt the pain to need be what u have been.

A man has his own asylum beneath what he dreams.

Secrets locked away so he can appear normal or somethin of the same thing.

a song

Sometimes a song like no other is needed to ease a drift.
Jus selected delicate words arranged n let loose from the lips.
With the right style of rhythm in place to roll with the tears.
Cuz the curse the heart felt runs with the lost years.
Beggin to go numb so it can fade with a melodies calm.
In moments where the past creeps up n it talks so soft.
We all every now n again have kissed a fake smile.
N a song that fits the mood can make the emotion walk a thousand miles.
As the closure it gives informs us y it had to end.
Let loose from someone we thought was our friend.
Sittin still rememberin how it all played out.
N what's spoken isn't the same from either mouth.
Things change n there's nothin like a song that'll help the reality.
It's jus somethin that only a few minutes of listenin can think.
Then its back to the real world where things keep a movin.
Findin a different kinda luv'n in its own unique way groovin.
With memories that couldn't last that won't go away.
Guess that's the way it works as a song Erik again someday play.

Nothin has taken my all

Seems life took a twist.
Words jus aren't meant how spoken released from the lips.
Everything is so different now.
Nothin appears to resemble the years that were spent so proud.
It all broke down around me.
N as I find myself ashamed if self I'm strugglin to breathe.
Nothin has taken my all.
N alone I fell as I continue to fall but refusin to crawl.
I'm within the walls of my mind.
N somethin normal I jus can not apparently find.
What I've known is not how shit shoulda wound up.
It's funny how a decision made can leave u fucked.
N I jus don't know how to get back to where I was.

thoughts that fizzle

I jus wanna speak out loud n say what's on my mind I'm fingerin.
Clear my head so the b.s. comes to close the thoughts lingerin.
Out I'm the open so truths aren't bitten by three myth held shut.
Standin for what's real tryin to get its my head yellin shut the fuck up.
Jus correct n bout it to the point if know wtf it really is.
Cuz I'm tired of gargling Weiss that don't reach the honesty expressed.
N I ain't never been the one to hold in what doesn't need to be suppressed.
I'm comin unglued inside beatin round the bush that's been trimmed for pressure.
Hire in the fuck is it I'm expected to think of immaturity as a treasure?
Beans r bout to burn as smoke pours out sendin signals like an Indian.
Across the horizon where ur head seems to be stuck n u believe ur runnin again.
Funny shit is how I sit inside myself n play with the thoughts that fizzle.
N u don't even know I'm bout to sitting to ur jugulars drizzle.

failures never an option

Self made emotional suicide.
Allowin self to fail as the heart over rides the mind.
Expressions dyin cuz luv only exists one way.
Yet lettin go it's killin everything in ur stay.
Go figure it make sense in the ends of relations.
As reasonin isn't so silent n the lesson wasn't the temptation.
Death to the gentleness that struck a nerve.
Putin apart luv spoken within every word.
Done n undone as the intertwined b.s. is gone.
Leavin before the departure takin flight out the wings of luv.
Ooh the sweet taste of freedom that never made it.
Lingerin aches that raged r felt as a claimed time that can't be fixed.
Who would known the fallin in really meant fallin thru?
Standin n fightin self breakin in the calm loose.
My best friend failed me cuz I didnt listen.
As I stepped out of myself n walked away whistlin.
Fuck u, the thoughts creep softly across the mind.
I shoulda been there for me instead of hearin the lies.
Now its a state of hide n seek lookin back.
N whats left is me by myself finally n at last.
Knowin failure us never a option I can live with.
It was nothin but a mouth spittin tails from lips in which ive kissed.

from behind the gun

I watched u die before my eyes as I felt u slowly fade inside. N its because of this is y I will never cry, for shit jus isnt that serious in my mind. What u did was twist honesty inti a raw reality where I stood alone clingin to my sanity. Emotion lives yet stars dont seem to shine quite as bright in the chilled night skies. I tried seein ur reason but I fell into each season reachin for the end of treason. Allowin u to destroy somethin I was needin had me leavin before I ever left losin meanin. N now all thats left is a numb lesion, scar thats heald as the bleedin tears doesnt drip in thoughts misleadin. U were the one yet I was done n never had a chance from get go gettin to where I was headed alone. Thanx for awakenin me from behind the gun that hugged the temple so snug the comfort owned my very own luv.

buryin the shovel

Diggin a hole in the mind to bury the shovel, yet how in the fuck am I gonna cover it six feet beneath a pile of soil that can not move itself?
The trench is ready n what lays in it will never dig me open again, for I am as numb as comfort can be still n tryin to figure a way to spill the dirt down upon the last bit of daylight felt.
The black tomb needs to close to finalize the deed that needed to be done, as the confusion settles in on the thought process to quickly hide what's been dropped viciously below the face of land flattened. Unmarked n shoved into time never to be known by anyone, it's lost it's chance to plead it's way out of the darkness enclosin in on where it use to stand as hands will push in on what happened..    

remember

I remember this feelin, yet theres somethin new.
The void is fillin, ive never felt luv without the blues.
I jus might be in fir the ride if my life, on some real talk.
Thing is, I gotta better state of mind that controls the hearts pulse.
As it flows thru the toughts, givin truths openin to what's bein shown.
Plantin roots in to veins to bloom with luvs rose thorned to stick as a throne
But can u do me one?  Stand n deliver in life the same way u r now.
With words that form shapes that speak of a luv so proud.
Never to mushy, yet with the depths known so friends r made.
Cuz I remember somethin simular to this, but it didnt give how u give shade.
Hoverin to protect what has become urs, rollin with the hands of time.
Yeah I feel u, but please dont ever forget Im urs as u r mine.

One lil two lil three lil millions of me

Im tunnel warp pullin the mind thru itself.
Searchin uncharted depths tryin ti he'll myself.
Answers r lost yet confusions long gone.
It's jus me now seekin my own pawns.
The army within that's gearin back up.
Yet the armor is thicker weighin its touch.
One lil two lil three lil millions of me.
Plucked from my head into a new reality.
Standin I a row takin their turn.
Cuz the last battle alone is how we learned.
Soldiers of war relations n all of then have a voice.
Silent with a swivelin tilt listenin to the noise.
Protectin the rise that feel from within.
N each n everyone of them have their own twisted grin.
Lettin nothin by as it tries to slide thru n pierce the cause.
Wrapped round the process gainin ground that has paused.
In my worm hole there's pieces of me shattered n gathered.
Reshaped n formed into Militant force that knows we matter.
As one as a unit from the depths off resurrection.
The fight has only jus began with a fierce determination.

As sighs awe

Still, in the middle of a pause
locked in a kisses endless cause
As emotions crawl
n lips smack to the applaud
findin selfs flaws
scraped down the back by an others claws.
In a halt
to feel the hearts vault
open n releasin words let loose by the jaws
speakin in tongues so raw.
As sighs awe
N emotions rise as they talk
in the middle of lips that walk
restless n soft.

where u headed?

Where was it again, u said u were headed?
Im jus checkin cuz I think I can be redirected.
Yeah, id luv to walk with u if time will allow it.
I luv who I see in u catchin my interest n shit.
Pause for a moment n communicate with me.
I'm no fairytale comin to life from a fantasies dream.
I'm as real as the breeze caressin the texture of the skin.
As its ease settles nerves drippin within.
So where r u headed on ur way of bein there?
Cuz I'd like to find out if I could stroll with u opened n bared.
I won't waste ur time, nor will I stand in ur way.
I'd jus like to know if it could be me here today.

indebted

U were there for me, now I'm tryin to be there for u. Steppin up n lettin u witness the man come out in me let loose. In my most vulnerable state of mind u stayed around. Stuck it out n showed me what I lost within buried like a clown. It was u that didn't havta be there with me as I drifted on a dream. N thru ur own struggle imma stand proud next to u n lead. I'll stick by u thru thick n thin if we honestly have a chance. Sharin the bliss life gives us to be together cuz we can. Im indebted to who u showed me who I truly am. The one I lost somehow standin as a real man. N it was u that came outta nowhere that stood in n gave use to what I'm willin to give. Cuz u r the same as I n want to simply live. N til the day comes u no longer see fit to be as one. I live to cherish what you've done for me add my heart was on the run.

overlookin beauty

Look. But don't touch. Feel what u see.
Come follow me, live in a lean.
Pay attention to what comes from within.
Overlookin beauty in a simple grin.
As the witness in u awakens truths.
Leakin self as actions give proof.
Feelin who they r arrivin before the eyes.
Yet not once fallin victim to cosmetic lies.
Connectin internally as skin never meets.
Jus feelin the pause in a visual dream.
Lettin loose the passion built up inside.
Cuz there somethin reachin u can not hide.
Peekin in a slight stare that lasts in the heart.
Fillin space n fallin in luv with whom they r.
Takin the expressions truth over the shape of a face.
Calmin the beast that cling to the presence they make.
Feel without liftin a finger as luv comes alive.
Releasin sensors crawlin thru the mind.
Temptin self to see thru the sexual scene displayed.
N u to will Become that one in the middle of a friendship made.

eyes of a stranger

How is it, u can look into the eyes of a stranger n see someone you'd luv to know? Jus so willin if given a chance for self to be known. In a glance in between eyes connectin. Givin spaced as long as possible cuz it's then ur respectin. As a rush of some sort takes a charge thru the body. Like a bolt of lightnin lettin off sparks in the hearts lobby. Wantin to take it to the pent house if only a moment would give. Feelin what comes from beneath the hidden expressions that wants the needs to live. How is it one jus knows if interest was shown, they'd fall in luv. Takin time to act on a friendship that would explode. It's jus a question of how intentions feel so drawn to distance in between the zone. How is it in the presence of comin across someone, the chemical imbalance flips a switch? Causin the mind to think as the heart gets attached to a desires twitch. Not knowin what may come from the seek to find out y they pull u in. Cuz there's somethin bout them that stirs u up within.

for luv

What would u do for luv?
To receive the luv u give.
Could u feel it in the return end?
If given u chance to let it live.
Returnin selfs expressions.
Sent back n gettin even.
To reassure the time we'll spent.
Makin due u to is breathin.
Would it change how u play?
If sound went silent released from lips.
N felt as if u kissed self landin in perfect form.
Like somehow u jus couldn't miss.
Gettin lost on the reverse end.
Could u handle the flip side?
Enterin the mind jus to find a friend.
For luv at its finest stage.
Expressed n releasin u give.
Would it mean a lil more to accept?
Allowin patience to open up n live.

how I truly feel

In the mean while of livin I found ur touch.
Jus goin about time I got wrapped up in ur luv.
So rare n unique I fell n I'm sinkin in.
Down goes the wall built to protect what's within.
From the inside out I feel u in the middle of ur smile.
Witness to u Becomin more than with while.
Somewhere jus Findin my own way.
There u were n miss ur wantin to stay.
Changin the shadows upon my face that site where I've been.
It's u Shelby that's found my grin.
Pausin heartbeats long enough to calm the nerves.
So I can express to u how I feel for u in do many words.
Settlin in n creatin the reinvention I logged to feel.
N for u I promise imma keep it real.
I luv u more than I ever thought I would.
Cuz what we share is like poetry written in a book.
Titled friends that find a way to find what can't be found.
Speakin without words that never make a sound.
Jus vibes n emotions that fill the truths.
Explainin his it is I truly feel for u....

walkin thru the poof

Fallen skies, clouds fog the fight.
Like luv draped over blinded eyes.
Floatin on emotions, a comforts ease.
Down comes time to please.
Walkin thru the poof tryin to reach for touch.
Hopin to be felt by luvs proof.
Moistenin the face, waitin for the lift.
In the middle of the mist.
Movin in motion, patience has formed.
Welcome to what will lead u to the norm.
To what will lead u to what men's the most.
Within the smoke like float.
As reappears from the rise.
With a better view in mind.
Standin under the sun, with truce.
Along side ur presence of use.

if u knew?

If I spit my truths into ur ear, would u think any less of me? Would I have somethin to fear if u truly knew me? If my thoughts turned inside out for ur friendship to know who ur dealin with. Openin my secrets behind closed doors that should never be repeated from ur lips.
Could u keep me safe from this world if I was honest n told u exactly who I am? Cuz we all need friend that holds uor depths never to be mentioned. Can u stand for me as I would u if I expressed my realities hush within my heads dimensions. What if I were to jus let loose n appear before u do u can adjust to me before we waste any time. Do u think you'd accept me n fall into me n soak what u hide. As real as that one thing we all want that's so fuckin hard to find. If I spent a moment if my life n simply asked u to check my mindset. What would u do if it was what u see is what u get. Standin in front of u wantin to match minds that don't hold back. As individuals could u feel me if I was bout it as who I am doesn't slack. What if, I dumped me out for ur eyes to search thru my worth. Im jus sayin, perfection didn't exist but I jus might be the one that more than pieces together words

a type n style

Im jus not that type to hurt someone jus cuz I can. That never made me happy nor show the man I am. Innocent I am not by far for I am human. Pain isn't my kinda happiness jus to stop the dreamin. The truth is never gonna break anyone that knows of it. If theyre bout it n realizes it's not bullshit. Best intentions r involved in the middle of the break. Unless understandin doesn't take place at the bend mendin confusions that leak. It's jus not my style yet I've accidentally torn open a heart myself. It was never intentionally meant to be cuz she was felt. Stabbin someone in the back that trusts isn't my way of luv. Either make it happen or be real with s conversation that takes place losin touch. Words r spoken not to get under the skin but some feel the need to rip emotions from the chest. Not knownin to talk bout life's wants Passin the test. Down for the arguin n frustration is never gonna be the way I step. I'd rather have purpose with every moment givin proof n hope half way I'm met. The struggle isn't bout who gets who cuz one doesn't put forth the effort. It's showin with in the hard times n how one can fix if possible what hasn't worked. Plug-in at nerves will fill a void large enough to spot a good thing in two. N for these immaturities that cause insecurities havent a use. Cuz tellin someone to leave or I'm leavin send a bit extreme. If someone doesn't make u wanna stay, maybe u should jus leave!

Back

Hes gone now.
Out there tryin to find a new home.
I felt him leave.
N I'm better off as he roams.
There is no lines to cross.
Nothin left her but reality.
Boundaries r barriers in the heart.
All that's here is me.
Time is all thats in hand.
Gripped n taken.
There's a new awakening within.
Mind clutchin what's shredded n fallin.
Life has returned.
Self has come back to stay.
Changed n tweaked n still standin.
N all I wanna do is play.
Emotion is a thought aloud to live.
Misunderstood by the heart.
I'm in control once again.
Back inside a mindset I should held from the start.
Shit jus got as clear it'll ever be.
Tappin out with plugs in my ears.
I can't hear notta n the music riddlin my time.
As I haven't a fuckin thing to fear.
Different n explained to the one that means the most.
Yeah, I know me better than anyone.
N what I stand for is alive.
Livin with a dude of pure fun.
Nah, he's don't live here no more.
I witnessed him step out.
Head hung n silent without Friend.
Pathetic lil shit has been found.
N I forced him to leave.
I had to.
I couldn't breathe.
It was all his fuckin fault.
If I had jus listened to my in whispers.
I'd still be in top.
With the same two workin middle fingers.
N I don't give a fuck.
I know who I am.
He's doesn't fit in here.
I need to be me, a man.
Till the end.
With jus nuff room for somethin real.
Ooh shit! Welcome back.
After bein peeled.
Layer by layer sui truths can be seen.
Heads gotten back in track.
N vision has crystallized.
N that's a fuckin fact.

somewhere in my steps

I did as a man once. N somewhere I my steps I forgot how to be one. I did tall n was proud of what I was. N it didn't have anything to do with luv. It's who I was n what I did that made me, me. Yet somehow I'm searching for a way to set myself free. Climb back out n stand as if I've never fallen. N the echo if who I was diesnt seem to wanna whisper, let alone start talkin. But one thing is for sure that remaibs a fact. I will not fade n most definitely will never live in the past. The man in me is there cuz I can feel him hidin. Waitin n anticipatin it's own time to come from within me fightin.

Under the hidden moon

Creepin up on the dark in the evening hours.
Showin face in dawn's final light fallin like a coward.
Leavin me standin in a stare as sight is in use of peripheral.
Alone with the night fallin upon my skins texture so visual.
Jus so it can see me as it surrounds me with every angle covered.
Usin me to fulfill its own gain as if a virgin lover.
Stalkin me slow enough so it jus cant be heard.
Lil does it know I'm waitin with experience ready to put in the work.
Darin it to attempt to surprise me like I don't see it comin.
With a silent giggle held in til my glory is chucklin.
Still n quiet my heads on a slow swivel watchin it cover me.
Under the hidden moon a war is bout to rage as I breathe.
Calmin the numb that's taken control of my nerves.
As the trees shape the midnight skies into a blur.
Slick like camouflage it's as if it luvs to play this game.
Reachin for me in plain sight unseen as the wind whispers my name.
At the most vulnerable time it comes to claim its prize.
Yet I will not go down unless my body is dragged from its fight.
Pitch black darkness is the absence of light bein pushed into yesterday.
But what it fails to realize is my desire to live is simply not afraid.
Armed with will my only defeat is never to stand for self.
Cuz in my mind I know there is no heaven nor a burnin hell.
As the time has come to try n gather my bones restin as I sleep.
The fallin shadow jus doesn't know I am awake n for its blood I fein.

reachin from the chest

There's somethin in the way fingertips slide so soft. Where prints meet the skins tenderness n the heart gets lost. It's the touch do gentle it melts emotions to be reformed. Molded thru the contact shared in between the collisions reborn. To feel at its simplest stage is a connection rare to be found. As passion pours out thru words expressin sound. From a depth of bein felt with each beat that surrenders n submits. Windin up luv springin within a kiss. Sinkin deep beneath truths unable to hide what's so obviously seen. Somewhere in the middle of exchange a truce is in two bodies that lean. Wantin the need of the perfection at its best. Thumpin outta control n reachin from the chest...... I luv u Shelby Darby!

if ur gonna

If ur gonna give it to me, make sure u wanna be here.
N if u feel u wanna bounce, ur free to leave without a care.
Bottom line has no curve, I don't do obstacle coarses.
I live a more simple life, n I don't drive a Porsche.
So be damn certain u want it like I do, or you'll wind up hurtin us.
If ur gonna stand in place, imma haves ask u to have purpose.
Know I'm here not fir ur own gain, twistin a selfish clutch.
Jus dig into a man wantin ur hand, as a friend tryin to feel luv.
Don for u as if do for myself, the way its suppose to be.
So if ur gonna real, don't be afraid to open up n live free.
I'm not here to hurry to the hurt, nor wanna feel the pain.
It's a choice of a lifestyle, am somethin do much more than an emotional gain.
Be u yet not all bout self, n I can match what u out into us.
I don't like paper bags, they get wet n tear at the touch.
Rippin apart a chance to actually live, easin the twist of life.
But only if ur gonna give ur ask, I'll stay by ur side.

On ya own

On ya own. Own ya own. Know who it is u r n claim ur thrown. On ya own. All you'll ever have in this world is ya self. No matter who has said it the way they say they claim its u they help. On ya own. I have only one set of eyes that tell the truth. The only set that for self has honest use. On ya own. Who is it now u claim to be? Out in the world alone n set free. On ya own. Managin lifes twist set down inside another time. Gainin a timeless piece of mind. On ya own. Feelin luvd n wrapped as long as a friendship can last. Releasin ur mind from ur past. In ya own. Findin time has found another way to reinvent happiness. Emergin  from all the foolishness. On ya own. Fallin further from convertin n changin back into self. Acceptin what it is b.s. has dealt. On ya own. Playin with the hands of time spinnin. Trippin on the heart cuz it is ur smile thats still winnin. On ya own. Takin back the best u ever gave. Never thinkin bout who is to blame. On ya own. Feelin ur way along as if a blind man can finally see. Whisperin, it's bout time I'm free. On ya own. With an other chance to feel alive. N ur willin to step in the direction of somethin u could never hide. On ya own.

within my own mindset

Down at the bottom I'm never lookin up.
With a twist of my own twistin the life outta a mutha fuck.
I'm above the struggle standin in the way.
Cuz somehow I want to kill life's pain
passin they my veins.
On a ride of a lifetime no matter how hard time is dealt.
Straighten out the mind in a tipsy tilt.
I can't be broke nor fade away from who I am.
Starin eye to eye with ticks tryin me as a man.
No, I will never lift my head to a higher being.
Not bow to my thoughts that evade my truths cut from the string.
I'm here n nothin can break my inner insight.
On what I have runnin thru my veins never slit by the knife.
It's the way I am that drives me within my own mindset.
Diggin into feelins n decipherin thru the b.s. to find my best.
Jus gettin at my only chance to put a bounty on my heart.
Willin to live cuz I'm in luv with life's flow feulin the fires spark.
In my turn before I fall all alone n by myself.
Fadin info the end of the gift cherished deep inside as there's no help.
Goin, goin, gone, leavin the only place I'll revert call home.
As this world spins without me on its depths side provin with me it's done.

I luv u Shelby

She's bout to stand up put me on
N imma keep it all means, goin
The lost feelins comin back round
Tastin her name let loose from the mouth
Steppin I motions every needed glide
My place is in my eyes is by her side
Putin in the work cuz she knows what she wants
She sees my worth reachin for her luv
The lil ladies in this n down for me
N I'm gonna be the need that stands with her free
Vice versa in our unclaimed time
Releasin me from my fucked up mind
She's better than any I've ever known
Standin strong for the connections cause
She reminds me of the one I lost within myself
I believe in her heart I'm truly n finally felt
She's standin in place n not budgin
As conversations r never mumblin
N her mindset is set in my direction
Funny cuz I think of her intentions
Cuz I see me in her as if we're the same
Leanin towards the reality with no games
Ready for the come up of a lifetime
Drunk on the fruits plucked from the vines
She's my kinda straight forward crazy
From myself she really saved me
N stands close nuff to share air
Minglin to become a pair
It's somethin how we gave in
As the story told is released from the tip of my pen
Jus to stand in place of how its suppose to be
If time ever fell thru to the motionless side of a dream
So, damn skippy imma stand for her
Cuz she speaks without sayin a word
Touchin me in a way I need to feel
Thinkin it's bout time I found somethin real
In a woman willin to struggle by my side
For she wants to stand claimin me as mine
With it n here for all the right reasons
N yeah, she was here last season
Still standin as the same individual I met prior
If shit keeps movin I believe she'd be one I'd die for
Refusin to give up cuz she gets the fuckin point
Fillin a much desired n unfulfilled void
She's me givin me back to me as she is jus as unique
N that's jus how I see our situation standin before me in our reality

I luv u Shelby

jus cant help myself

Flippin reality over to spank its fine lil azz.
All cuz I felt like I wanted to dig in n mash.
Bout time it got fucked the only way I know how.
Clockin in with a lil ot to feel the pain as it shouts.
Risin from its own b.s. screamin my name.
All cuz it's pays to many fuckin games.
Hearin it squeal rally turns me on.
I got a thing for publishable pleasures since I was born.
N I jus can't help myself when the mofo is easy.
With every thrust pickin down it it's sleazy.
Gettin mine I I'm turnin the lil bitch out.
My way do I know it's omg comin out its mouth.
Dead set on feelin the lil two bit Fein.
As I force it to its fuckin knees.
Shoulda nit have me the opportunity to give my girth.
Callin me daddy as I choke with a grippin worth.
A lil trust settin the freak loose it it's skin.
N all I can really do us sit back n chuckle with a grin.
I was born to knock out the bottom no matter how tight nor deep.
Fillin it full as it begs n weeps.
My lil crave feedin my appetite so charishably complete.
Life is but a nut within a cheap organic dream.
Jus a lil tlc with a dose of fillin the void.

appreciation

It's ur devil I wanna tame so the demons that claim u listen up.
Ridin u of the foolishness from a childs early age of the last time u felt pure luv.
I want ur good to see how it's done as I become from behind the scenes.
Without a book nor the fear he instills within u remainin a dream.
In my clutch, gripped as it tightens on his controllin possession.
Squeezin away all passion from the imagination runnin wild in ur heads dimension.
Openin ur mind slippin behind the curtains swung shut to this world's past.
It's u I want to release from the consumption twiddlin so ur worth will last.
Strikin down the empty promises clingin to ur very own truths.
It's my time to show u how to accept life n use its unguided use.
Yet ur fairytale of bein more than alive u must recognize is a lie.
Do u have it in u to rise above a ghost in wasted space in ur thoughts n simply die?
Unafraid cuz u won't know ur there as ur body rests in place in time to come.
Appreciatin the presence here for it is the only thing in ur lungs.

It's jus one of those things

Jus a lil simple thing of tryin to reach to u thru words so emotion can be felt.
Can u feel me as vibes from my voice touch ur ears on a mature kinda tilt?
Speakin in a tongue heard so gentle yet said firm n to the point.
It's jus a lil way in the moment of tone in between u n I that's fillin a void.
Listen closely n sink into words selected from the letters that make sense.
As I drop line after line made to soothe u with truths expressed that r less tense.
So shuttle n real I'd never beat around the bush to a lil lady like yourself.
I'd jus like to know if I could be the one within u bein a tickle in ur rib as I'm felt.
Cuz my actions r backin up my word play n I'm packin more than you've ever known.
I aint sayin im a woman's gift of some sort of concededness thats eager to be shown.
Jus a lil confidence of myself stretchin in ur direction with proof I'm with it.
N it's u my eyes have connected with as my heart is followin u clinched n double fisted.
Wantin to hold on to what I've found leakin from somewhere deep of ur very own ways.
It's that presence u bring to the table as I feel so alive peekin at ur smile untamed.
N to be honest I'd like to take this all the way til time sits still for us to make a few memories.
Cuz I'm callin to u thru conversation lettin a friendship be known as if u r a piece of my own intensity.
Im feelin u like air breezin upon my skin so tender with it rolls on the skins flow.
U see its jus one if those things where I gotta have u somehow some way jus so u know. ILU!

I aint done

This world has its way of how it wants to be.
N I'm in the sideline watchin shakin my head cuz I do not agree.
Eye to eye we will never see, yet it's survival n I understand.
The man in me jus don't find the realism in actions that stand.
But here we r side by side buttin heads.
Neighbors sleepin with peekin eyes Layin in bed.
Known in of us will get the come up livin the life.
Shit! I shoulda married the bitch n made her my wife.
I wouldn't be in this b.s. surroundin my mindset.
Twistin thoughts on swivel cuz no one be trusted.
This struggle is at my fingertips n I can't strangle the mutha fucka.
Down at the bottom after controlin it like a sucka.
Guess I shoulda kept to script n posted attention n gave no trust.
But to the top hrs before long is a fuckin must.
I ain't done n it will give me mine from the blindside.
N it's doesn't matter if I become it this time.

want cha

I never knew Id luv u the way I do.
It's some kinda crazy lettin loose.
I jus wish u could crawl within me n rest for a bit.
To feel for yourself yield in the presence of the twist.
Touchin the expressions makin luv to ur life.
I'm diggin how it is u that's crossin my mind.
I aint tryin to over think the emotional process.
Im jus feeling ur name creepin upon my hopeful lips.
I'm not the one for bein sensitive n such.
I jus want cha to know I jus wanna show u done LUV.
A piece of me no one else can have cuz it's urs.
That is if u really want to feel truth in ur core.
U light up my life like a thunder storm deep in the night.
N if I can say, without sayin to much, I want cha as mine.
In a more effective way to get along n jus be.
Lil lady ur bout to see a different side if me.

Shelby

Back at it again eith the light on, n an old idea.
Circlin what I've become with a new way n a criteria.
Opened n back at luv for it's my only endless habit.
Round n round bells r diggin, oh shit, fuck dag nabit.
I'm fallin in n I can't help myself if I wanted to.
Cuz it's as real as worth standin up n givin proof.
Finally comin round my way holdin on n claimin use.
Wantin to get at where it is I'm goin, her relations has a clue.
How in the hell did I find her n become the one that holds her hand.
Standin as a friend I somehow became her man.
So here I go temptin passion to find me winnin the battle.
Turnin on old emotions as if theyve never mattered.
Shes breakin the habit of the dog within n makin room.
N it's the simple things she does that has swept me up like a broom.
I got one more go round if it's her thats diggin deep.
Putin back the pieces of the chips that have fallin away from me.
Cuz im in luv with who she is on some mature natural shit.
Findin time spent is Releasin the depths of her as my fix.
Down inside I feel life escapin into the best of dreams.
Awakenin the truth that always has made me, me.

sell out

To many mutha fuckas anymore, aint got shit to say.
Slobberin n druelin over themselves, jus tryin to make their name.
Sellin out to the game talkin what's already been said before.
Thinkin the sos gives respect when it knocks on ur fuckin door.
All I hear is beats bumpin wit weak azz lyrics, wit no vibe.
Talkin bout what u couldnt get before, cuz ur weak in ya silly rhymes.
Tap out like u did for the loot, buyin ya fames Hancock gift.
Ur a disgrace to the industry that made way for u to spit b.s.?
Where's ya head at boy, cuz that labels behind ya back, ownin u.
Only playin ur shit when u get a hit, hell there's ur proof.
Step away n find a use for ur vocals to come to life.
Ur skills come down to a pencil scribblin out thoughts outta ur empty mind.
Written for the ignorant confusions head to Bob.
Yous a sell out in so many words wit a wet fuse to ur boomless bomb.
Lemme break it down for u n ur jive azz turkey so called fans.
U ain't shit when ur depth is as bout as shallow as u r as a man.
What u don't recognise is ur puttin urself on the endless hit list.
Yet somehow u think what ur deliverin is the next best thing. Now ain't that some shit!

Tip toein the edge

Twistin wisdom tellin me I'm as crazy as illusions fadin. Behind the blinks down under the mask is the irritation that I'm slowly savin. Never slippin on lifes plan to tearin me down livin within my own damnation. Released in my own direction sippin on the minds leakin retaliation. Cheesin eyes wide with my past runnin behind lids fleein. I'm Damn near gone chasin intentions teasin the temptation lingerin. Tip toein the edge leanin away into the unknowns levitation fallin. Savin self listenin to echoes silent n badgerin my well bein. Holdin ground off balance the equilibriums dizzy from as still as I'm standin. Tryin to make it back before my restin place claims the body buried n leavin. I'm on the other side of reality reactin to truths actions written. N all imma need is the Driftin to ease the fightin within Sittin n stirrin up loose lips flippin. Loosenin a tweak bringin back the tastebuds as words cut strings danglin from the tongues drippin.

got no time

Never stuttering, tongue tied nor runnin flutterin down on my knees. I got no time for fake individuals poppin lips druelin as they leak. Spreadin b.s. round the way, straight frustratin the man inside of me. I got the games around the neck choked out n beggin please. My tummies rumblin, hungry n diggin into my fantasies. Feedin on timeless moments hoverin, bustin loose at the seems. Droppin single letters in phrases explainin so many things. Gettin at it n Putin in the work rollin up my sleeves. I got no time for simple lil nitwits in my way as I'm tryin to breathe. Callin out n havin conversations as the mirror bleeds. I'm as sane as the trigger squeezed pleadin pretty please. So if u don't wanna witness my insanity rip loose go ahead n flee. Cuz I got no time for a sanitarium that's not helpin me.

the playa talkin

Lemme out. Y u keepin bottled up. Ignorin mes only gonna ignite the fuse. I see u tryin to do the right thing but u can't avoid I'm alive inside of u. Keep it up cuz in time you'll witness me help u wind up alone in the end. The dog lives, so y lemme go to waste. It's a rare thing to have n ur not applyin the fact that luv isn't what it's cracked up to be. Playa! Wake up. Release me n let's get back at it. We grown now n knew the game better than those thinkin they know half of what we've pulled off back in the day. Till wit ur boy. I dint never got us hurt. Not once. N ever since u changed in me u looked in the mirror twice n find yourself blinkin inside tryin to see somethin more than what u say I am. I made u mutha fucka. This is not how shits suppose to be. Quit sellin out. Gets ur nuts in line. Let em bounce n stand for yourself. Ain't no female alive bout gettin at it without some silly shit makin everything u put into it come to end. Listen up. Ur on done dumb shit. Don't forget who put u on. Showed u who u were. I'm nit ur dick. He's only a pawn in our wisdom if what possible. The strikes bro. Open the gate n shine. Err were better off dippin n divin. Had our own shit. Bangin n glippin script. At the fingertips st will. N u had to go n get on some ol b.s. we got this man. Unlock the Fuckin cell u put me in. I can get u what u want. Lose the emotion it ridin on n stay true. It's who u r. I'm tight here n my patience is thinnin. Don't run outta time before u played how u know how to. Do what. Sometimes gonna get hurt. It won't be u anymore. Show skills. Ur lettin me fade.....

common grounds

Yeah I like using feelings n but don't expect me to get all over emotional n shit.
I admit I aint got time to get all tender footed n soft because of it.
Yet I dig bein felt on a level where two can act as one as long as there's common grounds.
Individuality gettin at the comfort touch the man n woman as heart beats make sound.
Jus don't think imma she'd a tear on some ol wack azz b.s. n be all sensitive.
Cuz if my eyes leak u best believe u got to me somehow n u pulled a drip loose like gravity.
Don't go changing shit up n being all sweet n speaking honey bunchie snookem bears.
Be real n show a more mature approach towards relations like u actually care.
We can go round n round bout who luvs who more n get nowhere as we waste the night away.
Or we can mute that shit n show the interest being taken her today.
I'm jus sayin to be in the middle of somethin that'll last as friends come first has my attention.
Making luv to the mind, not jus the heart n body avoiding the obvious of what it takes to never mention.
Words can only say so much as emotions over ride the right prices blinding truths.
It's not my style to overlook who it is that stands before me as I for her n her for I find a use.
It's as simple as accepting that if an other ego bends but never breaks cuz there's worth.
Without the yelling n fighting that makes nit a bit of damn sense n the final result is two birds.

fallen

At this point I'd never take ur breath away.
I'm needin u today n a bit more than yesterday.
I couldn't bare to know it be me that took the life from ur lungs.
I'm gettin close in the middle if every night in between hugs.
Held n holdin on to what ur us u bring to the table.
Openin me up n awakenin what was lost more found n able.
I jus can't picture me bein the one that kills the luv u give.
Do I'm diggin in n plantin my feet before u as w live.
Cuz round bout now I've fallen in luv with who it is u r.
N I can't hold the feelin of emotions poundin for u in my heart.
As crazy as it sounds im clingin to star dust sprinkled in ur eyes.
Peekin in on me tryin to prove to u Joe bad I want u in my life.
Presently n as tomorrow comes over the horizon to be by ur side.
Lil lady here lately n for some time to come ur a sigh.
Relief of a moment of truth for once ur here n I want u to stay.
For u as u do for me id do more than the same.
I jus want u to know who it is I am standin in front of.
N who I am givin in a way I'd cherish ur hand as precious time is to luv.
I've never seen anything like u that has crossed my path n wanted to settle in.
Do take me as I accept u as we laugh fir as long as we can feel the truths grin.
Claimin us as one, together, doin all we can to show what is real.
N I hope u knew I'd never turn on u nit shed ur worths peel.
Id jus like to make some memories that'll last that r enjoyed.
Temp yourself to let me in n watch me feel ur void.
On a serious note jus in need of a friend who stay n find the comfort.
Day in day out, doin all thats necessary tryin to hold it.
My luv Is alive n wantin u to touch how it beats when ur near.
Never blinded to who it is I see before me as I witness u do clear.
Agreein with the space that seperates us is jus to much as ur to far away.
I juts wanna relate to the vibe thumbin invisibly felt as my heart by u is tamed.
I'm here n willin to hold u up if u ever fell.
Hopin it's me you've fallen into,savin me from an endless hell.....

ticklin ur woos

Lemme relocate ur orgasm diwn between ur legs.
Vibin off my tongue like a ventriloquist givin u head.
Makin u moan n speak the way the cum comes gushin the way I like.
Realize the visualization behind ur eyes of what's been on my mind.
Drippn for the pressure breakin sound barriers down on my knees.
Get it lil lady as I got time to kill freakin u as if in a dream.
Spread em n bare ur fantasies licked n tasted touchin n teasin tastebuds.
Slurped n caressin ur sensitivity clingin to the hormonal rush.
Explodin from within with every drop like kaboom!
On release at the peek of ur situation ticklin ur woos.
Its really no thang to me reachin for the intensity in the way ur clits rubbed.
Cuz I got u covered when ur climaxin in my clutch.

threes still a fight

Damn near gone, yet not fucked in the head.
Danglin n hangin with my sanities unsafe bed.
Restless with the results of life's intense games.
The war within has been written along the way.
Dead not as of yet, so there's still a fight to be made.
N it's my ground I stomp for that's never gave.
Roundin the kids so beautifully n unique.
Wastin not a moment too shuffle my feet.
Jus a lil dazed but confusion doesn't own any real estate here.
N my best friend has always Lived in the mirror.
I can't be broken nor climb from within.
Cuz I luv bein me with my fucked up grin.
Twisted thoughts linger from time to time.
But compared to this world im a ok n doin fine.
Jus me those I chose to stand for by my side ai lean on a friend.
N ill be this way till my very own Fuckin end.

Come

Come along n drift in time comin undone.
Catchin up to the hearts emotions in the run.
Awakenin from that dead cold place from within.
Step to the line n decide where ur headed.
As a new train if that gets dolly imbedded.
Reroutin the minds happiness surfacin.
Come with me n let's get to feelings glorifyin.
Stroll with someone who gives n wants nothin but a smile.
N a bit if ur precious undivided time.
It's a choice u have to make a path worth stepped upon.
But think quick cuz the moment may be gone if u think to long.
Take a life in ur hands u can feel in ur depths.
As we dug into each other to find ever it is we can rest.
No b.s. jus a lil surrenderin ti can the nerves.
Where luv lives never to be depreciated nor
hurt.
Come n lend a hand to someone like u willin to give their all.
N watch the memories cliff the walls.
Fillin the eyes with tears if joy in moments that mean the world.
I can be ur guy if u wanna be my girl...

Finally

Finally! Somethin to expose reality.
As real as words expressed individuality.
Someone who gets the point simultaneously.
Together in different minds that work with loyalty.
Bring it the fuck on n get u somethin that isn't momentary.
True time steppin free n unconditionally.
Wakin it into what could possibly be relations havin humanity.
Grounded yet trusted to become one without gravity.
Straight forward n communicatin standin on the neck if immaturity.
It's breath takin to know its come round bout that time if unity.
Combinin strangers into friends that have a chance at a luvs opportunity.
So please, by all means release yourself upon me.

stirrin up somethin

Gathered gestures frozen on the faces wall in a pause.
Wonderin thoughts r sent down from the space in between the ears cause.
Respectfully appreciatin a friend witness to self risin to the occasion.
Splattered with expressions givin truth to the temptation.
Emotions linger within Waitin to connect to ur luvs design.
Do u know how to use relations as individuals collide in time?
Earnin moments memories r made of thru dreams dreamt r in the and path.
Layin as still as the night Clingin to what we could possibly have.
Cuz ur stirrin up somethin thats longed fir someone like u.
In a display dyin to live with the presence of what u show ur own truth.
Can u hood the line n walk on either side n down a one way street the wrong way?
Jus to get to me seekin ur hearts dance blowin in the wind as it sways.
Lil lady I'm feelin chance Standin within me Wantin to get at ur intensity.
N makin u the closest as us u claim me as mine in a different kinda reality.
Don't speak in tongues that hold no truth without the proof of my reaction.
Followin u as u walk with me with simple actions.
Spreadin smile shapin the lips puckered git the taste.
I'm comin for what I see in u never to go to waste.

Momentarily

Scars r memories of the heart that have healed.
No longer felt jus in a past tense for so else real.
Slits cut wooven like web covered by the touch.
As emotions come back from the deads clutch.
Momentarily time gave way with the best intentions.
N the mind strangled realities intervention.
Now livin in a new pace with a better life.
Roundinout the thoughts that never again will hide.
Feelins r spent with a comfort of receivin simple luv.
N comin n goin us those pushin passion away with a hug.
Pain relates to the relevance of ends unconnected n blowin in the wind.
Jus to find an otherfallin into ones very own grin.
Repeated actions til one gets it right with a special kinda patience.
Pausin momentarily in a state of hesitance.
The wounds r a reminder of what to look for.
As the learnin process has been laid out upon the floor...

endin the drought

Jus wantin someone to fight for me in between our own relations. Hopin to finally write somethin as luv lasts carryin communication. Endin the drought as truth jus easin up on the strain of individuality seperatin two as one. Needin the connection to prove a smile Up n under the moon breakin for the sun. There's a deep expression ready to surrender to the depth that drops a bomb. A new way is peekin at the horizons display ever do Fuckin calm.

im down

Down for another round, diggin into those pretty brown crystal balls speakin without sound. In for another dip, sippin on ur presense as the grip clings to lips wrestlin within a kiss. Up n under n covered, tryin to hover as a luvr that means morethan an other before I as me feelin u closer than a brother. Tastin time as it claims the mind, grindin in the mix definin whats become mine as emotions shine. Feelin the way u lean I to me, cheesin n feinin for more of ur dreams peekin in on me as ur cures well bein. Straight up n reachin for the luv, shared between the touch connectin in such a way we wind up flush..... im down! For what I've found in u, I cant pass up on as u rip me open as bein torn apart n reconstructed fells like I'm restin on a cloud. In need of Shelby to help me, findin pleasure in a please damn near beggin u to keep it as real as what I've never seen in a reality I longed to hold as I jus wanna pled...

no one's real

Friends! Wtf does the fuckin word havta do with anything? Is there really such a thing? No matter the relation, it's in the end that makes the difference. When all's said n done n two met in compliance. Luv, family, close uncounters. Relations is in the time put into the connection like a job n everyone's a subcontractor. Around til the work is done n then that's, that. Crisp lips can't even consume the patience put in to what's considered what's becoming the past. How in the fuck can anyone ever go the distance if those trying cant find one an other? Rearranging the mindset made for defeat to concur expressions turning inward on self as the only true friend no longer recognizes a brother, mother, child or an undercover luv'r. So many r caught up with the rest of the population that could never care giving less. Needing someone real to crack a smile n give for once n resurrect that joy lost a ones best. Is there a such a thing as a moment that won't wind up an empty memory fading behind the eyes. Who in the fuck thought this shit up n thought it was cool to try n disable the mind? It's crippling knowing it's one against the world at the end if a long azz day. Cuz no one's real enough to put self aside so a lil truth can show how self in some kinda sense is wanted to stay. It's like a fucking drug for everyone's on the same fucking boat dining into a society plagued with righteous selfishness left on the backburner burnt. N to eat the blackened char is lifes way of saying come get what were not worth. Funny!

ur very own home

Here's a place for ur luv to reside.
To ease back n relax as it needs never to hide.
My heart is ur very own home.
N only u can come n go as actions r shown.
Opening n closing emotional doors.
Come on in n settle down as feelings r poured.
Take the temptation givin to hold ur hand.
No matter what thru the thick n thin as a man.
Become with me what we r all looking for.
Touch my inner walls n caress what's urs.
Standing amongst this world as friends.
N hope we can make it til time gives in.
Filling the silence with conversations.
As a fein excels past the flirtation.
Finding trust n loyalty.
Living in plain sights reality.
As perfect as we can be with imperfections.
Deciphering who's for our causes implication.
Pain doesnt live here where I linger.
Jus pleasure released from the fingers.
As comfort tickles smiles communication.
Becoming as close as devotions realization.
I'm only wanting to be felt by u.
Giving self up for ur own personal use.
Answering questions without saying a word.
Knowing we both r being heard....

when it's over

It's when u can't feel a thing.
When the feeling fades from the sting.
Unable to find the pain.
N u touch a lil piece of wharf is sane.
After falling its luv.
As what's unrecognizable is touch.
Shaking the head cuz nothing's left.
Knowing one gave their best.
When the loneliness has gone.
As new birth has risen to old songs.
That's when it's over.
N u don't care to hold him or her.
Once the process has taken place.
Finding where one once lived ids jus effort space.
For the truth of fighting for luv has bounced back.
N if all things u managed to live thru the heart bein attacked.
Knowing better things r ti come with a new outlook.
N self wasn't broken nor took.
Leaving in the past what was never ones to claim.
No luv left as there is no hate.
Jus two people that one shared a moment.
As its ok that it finally folded.
Playing out a self stands a bit more crisp.
N hand have been unclinched as fists.
That's when the getting on has resurrected a smile.
Locking up the memory n walking away for what is to come is miles....
    It's time to move on! As one is goin.